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Let's Pretend This Never Happened: A Mostly True Memoir

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3.88 of 5 stars 3.88  ·  rating details  ·  88,336 ratings  ·  12,122 reviews
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For fans of Tina Fey and David Sedaris—Internet star Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, makes her literary debut.

Jenny Lawson realized that the most mortifying moments of our lives—the ones we’d like to pretend never happened—are in fact the ones that define us. In the #1 New York Times bestseller, Let’s Pretend This Never Happened, Lawson takes readers on a hilarious journ
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Hardcover, 318 pages
Published April 17th 2012 by Amy Einhorn: Putnam (first published 2012)
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Bossypants by Tina FeyIs Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? by Mindy KalingLet's Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny  LawsonAre You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by Chelsea HandlerMy Horizontal Life by Chelsea Handler
Funny Women Memoirs
3rd out of 204 books — 879 voters
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Best Books of 2012
48th out of 3,027 books — 9,357 voters


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Community Reviews

(showing 1-30 of 3,000)
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Jenny Lawson
Jan 10, 2012 Jenny Lawson rated it 5 of 5 stars  ·  (Review from the author)
I wrote this book so I think I'm required to like it. But I'd like it even if someone else wrote it. Although if they did I'd sue them for stealing my life story.

How confusing.

Much like the book.
Grace
If you're looking for a Sedaris alternative, this unfortunately isn't it. Which kills me, because I get the feeling Lawson had the potential (and raw material) to knock it out of the park, but it just doesn't come together.

Jenny Lawson is definitely funny. When she really gets going on a story, it's pretty fantastic - but that's only 10% of the book, and the remaining 90% is just awful. I can't help feeling like this book was all written in a single sitting, with little editing or review. It's u
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Jeanette  "Astute Crabbist"
Skull and crossbones on this one if you're easily offended. So no whiners, okay? I mean it. Just....no whining.

This is the most hilarious vagina memoir ever written. Okay, so technically it's not just about vaginas, but she mentions hers more often than anyone I've ever known who actually owns one. And besides, I had to throw that out there right at the start, so if you're going to get all upset you can just get it overwith and stay. away. from. the. book. Should you choose to read it anyway, d
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Patrick
First, I should mention that I listened to this one on audiobook. Didn't read the text version.

Second, the audio version is read by the author. I think Jenny did a nice job with it, too. If you're used to nothing but professional audiobook narrators, there might be a few verbal ticks in here that might bug you. But me? For an autobiographical work like this? I'd much rather hear it in the author's own voice.

Third, she got some actual laughs out of me. Not just amusement or smiles. Not just chu
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karen
**edited...with content!**

watch your fucking back, sloane crosley...this lady is funny-funny, not "boys tell me i am funny at parties because i am pretty" funny.

i am so glad that kelly read this before me and it encouraged me to pick up my ARC and get into it far earlier than i ordinarily would have. BUT NOT EARLIER THAN I WOULD HAVE HAD I ACTUALLY WON THIS THROUGH THE FIRSTREADS PROGRAM, WHICH IS HOW THIS SHOULD HAVE GONE DOWN, GOODREADS!STOP WITH THE SNUBBING ALREADY!

i had never heard of jenny
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Katie Mercer
Basically the best review I can give this book, is that as a librarian I'm pretty much giddy with excitement waiting for the things people will come tell me after they've read this book. From the (boring) I loved that it was an honest look at mental illness and survival (very true) to the (no seriously I can not wait) YOU LET MY CHILD READ THIS AND NOW THEY WANT A DEAD SQUIRREL PUPPET and THIS BOOK IS BLASPHEMY AND READING IT KILLS PUPPIES AND KITTENS.

I pretty much giggled in excitement when I w
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Chris
Aug 20, 2012 Chris rated it 1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: people with no sense of humour, whiny people, folks with too much spare time Americans
Overall Rating: 1.5


I don’t know if it’s specifically American problem, but let me tell you, this is one of the worst memoirs I’ve read. (Seriously America, do you honestly find this funny? O.o) And I’ll tell you why, I’m not just saying this because of some misplaced sense of spite, ok?

When I first heard about this book, I was very excited – it sounded like a real good reading material and it had an awesome cover to boost with too.

From the very beginning though, I realized it would be far from t
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Trudi

Jenny Lawson (aka The Bloggess) is seriously effed up, and that doesn't always equate with being seriously bleeping funny but in her case, this book will S-L-A-Y you. I laughed so hard in parts I shed tears (and a little pee I think). Just sayin'. For anyone out there with some incontinence issues already.

Her frantic, stream-of-consciousness delivery (though punctuated with gems of insane hilarity) can get exhausting. Sometimes you just want to scream, "Jenny, will you just shut the *&%@# u
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Diane Librarian
JENNY LAWSON ATTACKED ME WITH A MACHETE!!

OK, so I have never met Jenny Lawson, and she didn't attack me with an actual machete, but I'm being metaphorical here, y'all.

Because reading Jenny Lawson's book made me feel as if I were being beaten with some kind of weapon, and it may as well have been a machete. Which is a word she uses in her book. She also likes the words chupacabra and vagina. And numerous swear words. She also likes postscripts. Lots of them.

But back to the machete. I opened my re
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Jaime Abbess
I’m not sure what I enjoyed more about this book. The actual laughing to tears moments while reading or the actual laughing to tears moments while retelling the stories to my boyfriend (who kept mentioning that he and Victor have a lot in common).

It says a great deal about Jenny Lawson (of blogging fame) that at 38, she was able to write a 300+ page memoir that is interesting to read. Interesting, not because she is a celebrity or has boinked a celebrity, but because she has lived a strange lif
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Kelly O'Dowd
Feb 27, 2013 Kelly O'Dowd rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for: EVERYONE
One of the perks at working at a large chain bookstore are the free Advanced Reader's Copies of future books. But I guess one really can't get an Advance Reader's Copy of a book that came out in the past. Although, strangely enough I've seen it happen. But I think it's because the store mail got lost.

So I got this book for free. Which was awesome. Because when it finally comes out for reals, I'll think, HOLY CRAP I KNOW WHAT I'M GETTING! and totally buy it for like $45 minus my other perk of a
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Ariana
i heard an interview with jenny lawson on npr and she was really interesting. i had read some of her blog and it was funny, so i got the book

it's fun, and quite funny, but when someone moves from blog form to a published book, i expect the text to be more polished and streamlined.

instead, this book reads like it comes directly from her blog with no editing, clearly there was an editor since she quotes the editor in the text, but it still doesn't read like there was one.

anyway, it's worth a glanc
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Bry
FUCKING BRILLIANT.

Like seriously...fucking.brilliant.

And hilarious. Like I nearly choked on a sandwich while eating my lunch at work hilarious.

This book is the "mostly true" memoir of Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess who was a poor kid raised in West Texas with poisoned drinking water, a father who practices taxidermy in the backyard and collects bobcat urine, a younger sister who swam with her in a cistern that they shared with pigs, a mom that wrangled them all into a family, and a menagerie of
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Oriana
I don't like David Sedaris. And I distrust "funny" books the same way I distrust sitcoms with laugh-tracks, because it's condescending and discourages thinking for yourself. I will not be coaxed into mindlessly laughing because there is a recorded track of a bunch of people (computers? robots?) mindlessly laughing. Good grief.

So why did I buy this book? Well, because the Strand sells proofs for $2. I found this one, which I'd never heard of, thought it had a cool title, and then saw that the fro
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Maria Guzman
Apr 26, 2012 Maria Guzman rated it 1 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: no one
I think there might be something wrong with my sense of humor. I tried to read this book but it's not making me laugh. In fact, it's making me annoyed. It reminds me of a whiny nagger who is all about "me". Oh right, it's a memoir. Anyway, I jumped to some of the chapters to see if I missed anything funny but it was all the same. I'm giving away my copy in the hope that someone may find it funny and not completely waste the tree that this book was printed on.
Christy Compeau
May 05, 2012 Christy Compeau rated it 4 of 5 stars
Recommended to Christy by: Kelli Jordan
This book is a laugh out loud, get yelled at by your husband because your silent laughter is shaking the bed too much, entertaining book. I've never read the author's blog but really enjoyed the book. The only detractor for me was the over use of the F-bomb. Granted, I was assured that this is just the way that the author talks so I wont complain too much but I could have done without the overuse.

Read it!
Flannery
May 30, 2012 Flannery rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: People who like David Sedaris but wish he was raunchier, and Texan, and female.
Let's Pretend This Never Happened (A Mostly True Memoir) is a collection of stories from the life of Jenny Lawson, who is also known as The Bloggess on her blog of the same name. I was somewhat familiar with Lawson from reading bits of her often irreverent blog posts and laughing my ass off. She talks about a whole range of topics from childbirth all the way to squirrel puppets. Anyone who knows me knows that I love a good story. I love telling them and I especially love hearing them. The more a ...more
Josie
When Jenny Lawson relates a childhood story she's funny and engaging...but so far, that's only occurred for about 10% of her writing in this book. The other 90% I've read is just terrible. The parenthetical ramblings and anxious Turrets-style outbursts quickly get old, and they distract from some of the really funny and entertaining bits. Everything is "totally" or "basically" life-threatening or she's stabbing or kicking someone in the balls "in her head." Her nervous, panicky breakdowns feel l ...more
Becky
This is the perfect book to read if you’re constipated, because the abdominal spasms caused by your hysterical laughter will have to create a bowel movement.

This is also only the second book that has ever made me vomit. The first book was a History of Cannibalism. To be fair I was running on the elliptical, already a task for me, and I was doing fine until I flipped the page and there was a picture of HUMAN ARMS HANGING OVER A FIRE. I this point I gagged, and my gag reflux is such that I keep ga
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Erica
YOU: "Wait. Erica? You just read this book."
ME: "Yes. I did." (Here's the review)
YOU: "No, but I mean you JUST read this book. Like, two weeks ago."
ME: "Wow! You're pretty observant. Why are you watching my Goodreads feed? You know, just out of curiosity...one stalker to another. That kinda thing."
YOU: "What? You are SO weird. I wanted to know why you're listening to the audiobook if you just read the hardcover."
ME: "You probably should have asked me that in the first place instead of stating an
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Carol.
Feb 23, 2013 Carol. rated it 4 of 5 stars  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: people who love odd humor and can tolerate swearing
Recommended to Carol. by: while it was on my to-read, I confess Trudi's description made me bump it up

Oh, Jenny.

There is something so completely...

extravagant [ik-strav-uh-guhnt]
Part of Speech: adjective
Definition: exceeding the bounds of reason, as actions, demands, opinions, or passions.
Synonyms: absurd, bizarre, crazy, exaggerated, excessive, exorbitant, extreme, fanciful, fantastic, flamboyant, flashy, foolish, grandiose, immoderate, implausible, improvident, imprudent, inordinate, lavish, ludicrous, nonsensical, ornate, outrageous, preposterous, pretentious, prodigal, profligate, reckless,
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Ashley
I pre-ordered this book at Amazon as soon as I heard about it. I've been reading The Bloggess for years, watched her struggle with her rheumatoid arthritis, her social anxiety, and her depression, all the while being one of the most joyful and optimistic presences on the internet. I was happy for her on a personal level that I rarely am when bloggers get book deals, and besides my real affection for her, I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that Let's Pretend This Never Happened isn't rea ...more
Melki
Yeah...I thought I had it weird growing up. Besides being the daughter of an atheist father and a religious nut-job mother, Mom was also what the humane society likes to call a "collector." (This is a polite way of saying "animal hoarder.") At any given time, we had a dozen dogs and cats (and I mean a dozen of EACH, not total!) living in the house. For years, I used the toilet with my mother's pet possum sleeping right beside me.

Jenny Lawson had it worse than me, however. At least the animals i
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Caris
Aug 30, 2012 Caris rated it 3 of 5 stars
Shelves: 2012
Growing up, my parents had an affinity for the exotic and grotesque. Our yard was always stocked with some bizarre assortment of animals, from cattle to emus to peacocks. Whatever was being given away in the paper would eventually find its way to our house. My dad also liked to kill these things and feed them to us, because it’s fun? I don’t know. But our house was always filled with carcasses and dead things. The pot of simmering liquid on the stove was just as likely to be concealing a coyote ...more
Laura the Highland Hussy
Review Posted at Got Fiction and also at demon lover's books and more


4.5 stars

Ever since I saw Beyonce the Giant Metal Chicken pop up in my twitter feed, I have been hooked on the Bloggess’ special brand of humor. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in my life as I did when reading about Beyonce. So you can imagine my joy when I received Let's Pretend This Never Happened: in the mail.

I know that I pretty much only review romance, but this book is so much more than just “A Mostly True Memoir
...more
Caitlin
Audiobook. Which I think was my first mistake. I honestly didn't really like this book, because she annoyed me SO MUCH. Something about her voice/tone that bothered me. High pitched but needs a cough drop? Oh, and she pronounces the G in every word ending in ing. So annoyinGGGG. I gave it 2 stars because... well, I couldn't turn it off and I DID laugh a lot. She just builds up these "crazy" stories and then goes off on a 10 minute tangent on something else, and then comes back to the point (and ...more
Britany
This might be the best audio book I have ever listened to. I burst out laughing almost everyday in my car driving to and from work! The book is narrated by the author, Jenny Lawson. I want to believe that Jenny and I would make for perfect best friends in real life.

A book made up of wild stories, anecdotes, and conversations between Jenny and her friends and family. The book even had picture evidence! While this book couldn't be recommended for everyone due to vulgar nature of the book, and Jen
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Sarah
Really, instead of a written review, this should just be video of me laughing so hard while reading this at lunch that I started laugh-sobbing, much to the amusement of those around me. And I was only on chapter three - the chapter that involves, so help me god, a dead squirrel hand-puppet. If you've read Jenny Lawson (aka The Bloggess) before, I don't have to tell you she is absolutely hysterically funny. If you haven't, then, prepare yourself for one hell of a ride through her demented carniva ...more
rhea
Sep 11, 2013 rhea rated it 5 of 5 stars
Recommended to rhea by: Nick Kives
I knew I was going to like this book before really starting it:

description

I loved this book, sure it seemed like rambling, but it made me feel like she was talking to me and not so much like I was reading. Which was interesting and couldn't work for all books.

I don't think this is for everyone, there are some graphic descriptions, but she writes most of them humorously. Only once was there a serious chapter where I'm glad she left it at that and didn't try to make it funny. Most of the crying I was doing
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Linda
So I’m all excited, right, because several people have mentioned how very funny this book is, hilarious, in fact, and I’d probably really like it because I like funny stuff-- doesn’t everyone?-- and so as soon as I finished up the Henning Mankell audio I was listening to (he’s Swedish, you know, and writes about a marginally depressed Swedish policeman who solves really gruesome Swedish murders) I popped in the first disk of this cd and was struck instantly by how the reader sounded like she was ...more
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Known for her sardonic wit and her hysterically skewed outlook on life, Jenny Lawson has made millions of people question their own sanity, as they found themselves admitting that they, too, often wondered why Jesus wasn't classified as a zombie, or laughed to the point of bladder failure when she accidentally forgot that she mailed herself a cobra. Her blog (www.thebloggess.com) is award-winning ...more
More about Jenny Lawson...
Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things

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“Because you are defined not by life's imperfect moments, but by your reaction to them. And because there is joy in embracing - rather than running from - the utter absurdity of life.” 179 likes
“You should just accept who you are, flaws and all, because if you try to be someone you aren't, then eventually some turkey is going to shit all over your well-crafted facade, so you might as well save yourself the effort and enjoy your zombie books.” 133 likes
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