Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me
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Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me

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3.71 of 5 stars 3.71  ·  rating details  ·  30,050 ratings  ·  1,297 reviews
"My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate."--Chelsea Handler, from Chapter 10 of Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang

It's no lie: Chelsea Handler loves to smoke out "dumbassness," the condition people suffer from that allow...more
Paperback, 304 pages
Published April 3rd 2012 by Grand Central Publishing (first published May 10th 2011)
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suzannarama
Nothing screams, "Third in a three-book contract!" quite like Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me. In fact, it goes on to say, "Oh, shit! I'm three weeks over deadline and I still haven't written a word! I don't have time to write another book. I know! I'll let my friends write it for me! They should have enough to say about me to fill a whole book, right? No? Well, let me check my email, and see what else I can find."

The book starts out well enough (despite the obvious cop-out of not actually hav...more
Trey
This book is not as good as the ones Chelsea writes herself. Instead, it was kind of like a half-hearted roast, in that each chapter was told from the point of view of someone in Chelsea Handler's life, and each person took the opportunity to call her names and insult her, but ultimately professed their love/friendship/admiration for her (about 75% fawning and only 25% insulting). The insults lose a little of their bite, though, because the stories are about how Chelsea so adeptly lies to the au...more
Natalie (Natflix&Books)
I'm glad I'm not friends with Chelsea Handler. People who raved about this book may say that I have no sense of humor, but I wonder what is funny about your friend ruining the song you are singing to your brand new husband during your wedding reception, regardless if you can hold a tune or not; making you believe that you are being sued and probably fired for sexual harassement thus ruining your future; spoiling your honeymoon; forging emails to your friends and family that you are pregnant (whe...more
Dani Peloquin
While it is not exactly an enormous feat to read all of Chelsea's books, I feel as if I have come to know her over the years through her essays and memoirs. When this book came out, I was a bit leery. Though it's about Chelsea (who is almost always funny), it wasn't written by her and therefore I was suspect. Still, I had read all of her previous books and was in a serious Handler drought so I decided to take a chance. I was disappointed. While I chuckled a few times and smiled every couple of c...more
Samantha
Listened to this while driving from Minnesota to Chicago. This is a compilation of multiple people from Chelsea Handler's life writing about the practical jokes she plays on them. The bad part is that it is also read by the people who wrote each chapter. Some of the people reading their chapter were really great, others were awful or just plain annoying.

Aside from the actual readings, I didn't really enjoy the book. It was like listening to Punk'd but without Ashton Kutcher. Just couldn't get in...more
Samantha Ace
My main, conclusive thought about this audio book? Chelsea is an asshole.

This book was a collection of stories from Chelsea's friends and family, about all of the times she has terrorized them and basically ruined their lives.

Chelsea does not play practical jokes, these are long, drawn out spectacles that usually leave the recipient in tears or a panic attack or on the verge of a stress induced stroke. Her "jokes" are complete reputation ruiners. It is not funny. I was left cringing most of the...more
Alyssa Lieberman
As with every other book I have had the pleasure to read by Chelsea Handler, “Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me” left me with a red, tear streaked face, an aching diaphragm, and little respect for the outrageous comedian. I laughed the entire way through, even though this time I was not surprised at any of the ridiculous stories I read. This is perhaps because I feel like I have come to know Chelsea personally after reading several of her hilarious memoirs and essays. “Essays” may not be the mos...more
Paula
I liked Chelsea's book, my horizontal life, but this one falls flat. I’m embarrassed for her. I was hoping for a list of clever pranks and instead what you find is a series of dumb lies and uncomfortable insight into who she is and the relationships with people around her.

Its a collection of stories that illustrate how irredeemably F*%$ed up in the head the whole group is. And not in a funny way- in a very sad co-dependent abusive unpleasant way.

I used to think she was a talented businesswoman a...more
Bookstax
Turns out a book of "humorous" stories told by people who seem to need to be friends with any celebrity isn't interesting. Who could have imagined that! This book was a new low in the "crap I choose to listen to in my car" category. Listening to this book did reaffirm that my initial thoughts that Chelsea Handler was not only under-talented, but that she also got where she was by sleeping with the right people are completely true. Now, though, I know even more about her than I ever wanted to, an...more
Kim
This book will make you very, very glad you are not friends with and do not work for Chelsea Handler. Unless you like your weekends, honeymoons, and general everyday life ruined by her ridiculous and often weirdly cruel practical jokes. That said, her friends and co-workers seem incredibly gullible, so the book could also make you feel quite savvy and clever. Also, she and her friends and co-workers seem deeply immature--often in fun ways, but also really problematic ways, so the book could make...more
Judy
This book has absolutely no socially redeeming feature, so naturally, I really liked it. Chelsea Handler spends much of her time creating practical jokes with which to bedevil her friends. The rule seems to be that if she decides to make you a victim of her demonic humor, it's a sign of her love and respect. Unfortunately, I share this worldview which might be the reason that Chelsea Handler is one of my guilty pleasures. If I like you, I'm all over you, if I don't like you, I can't be bothered....more
Renee
Now this is the way to write a book: have your friends, staff and family tell very funny stories about you, or involving you; add a few comments at the end of each story, and cha-ching wait for the cash to role in! I gave this book three stars just for the genius of the idea!

In a nut shell this book is about the elaborate practical jokes Chelsea has been playing on her family and friends for decades. These pranks are deliciously malevolent but always hilarious. She is definitely a person that y...more
Kevin
'My tendency to make up stories and lie compulsively for the sake of my own amusement takes up a good portion of my day and provides me with a peace of mind not easily attainable in this economic climate.'. Chelsea Handler

Chelsea's family and friends share lies and practical jokes perpetrated by Chelsea.

Crass, edgy, foul mouthed and R-rated...with moments of hold your sides hilarity.

"I went out with a guy who once told me I didn’t need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him,...more
Josh
Mostly I just want to do what she's done. She clearly believes in herself like no one's business and is kind of a comedic genius. The book may have been funnier had she written it, rather than have her social circle recount (brilliant) tricks she's played on them. But whatever, it's damn funny. The bitch is kind of fierce.
Katie
This is one of those books that you pick up just knowing it's going to be good and it doesn't disapoint. If you're a Chelsea Handler fan or have enjoyed any of her other books, then you'll like this one too. This book, unlike her others is written by her family, friends and victimes of the lies and pranks she has pulled on all of them. It's crazy how a. inventive b. creative c. serious and d. careless she is about the lies she tells and the emotions she tears to shreads. But almost all of the co...more
Melissa
I'm rating this book as amazing not because it has any deep insights, trust me, it couldn't if it tried. But because it is absolutely hilarious. I laughed for extended periods multiple times while reading this. Some of the pranks she pulls are just too out there, but it's nice to know that she cares about her friends and family enough to inject that amount of humor into their lives. They may not always appreciate it at the time (I'm sure I wouldn't either) but it's nice to have that sort of thin...more
Pam
I have watched Chelsea Handler on Chelsea Lately, and I have read "Are You There Vodka, It's Me Chelsea?", so I had an inkling of what to expect from "Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me." But it was even better then I expected.

This book is written by friends and colleagues of Chelsea, and it is basically their stories of her pranks and lies to them. You see, Chelsea loves to lie and she loves to pull pranks, and the two go hand in hand. I can see why she loves to lie, she is fabulous at it! As e...more
Ashley Mackler-Paternostro
I've read all of Chelsea's other books. Loved them. They are all laugh-out-loud books. Chelsea manages to get herself into some seriously bazaar situations, and her quick wit seems to always be her saving grace. If you've ever wondered how or why "all" that seems to pile down on this one woman, after reading this book, you'll wonder no more...she welcomes crazy in and then full on embraces it.

This book is written by the people who fill Handler's day, not by Handler herself--which, of course-- y...more
Stevie
after 1.5 chapters: It is making me LMAO, so far
"Yippee Kiyay, Mr. Falcon!"
… at first it was ok and moderately amusing … then it was just something I needed to get through. I mean, it was totally ok, and parts of it are pretty funny. She is mean, though -- or her friends are really stupid, especially the one who changed his honeymoon based on some prank she pulled..... and some of those women seem like airheads. All of the readers are pretty annoying except her siblings – their voices aren’t as...more
Bridget
I have mixed feelings about this book. At first I thought Chelsea was really mean to her friends. I wouldn't want to be friends with her, not that she would want to be friends with me. The reoccurring theme throughout the book is that Chelsea plays practical jokes on her friends, if she doesn't humiliate you that means she doesn't love you. She also is extremely loyal to these friends that she humiliates on a daily basis and buys them great presents/trips. I liked that each chapter was written...more
kelsey
Maybe it's because I had such high expectations of a book from Chelsea Handler. Maybe it's because I had read the amazingly funny "Bossypants" right before it. Or maybe not all of Chelsea Handler's friends should be able to write a chapter in a book. Whatever it was, this book simply wasn't up to par by Handler standards.

We get it. Chelsea Handler acts like a 7 year old boy with boobs. She likes to play pranks (some of which are painfully stupid - yet people fall for them), but she only messes...more
Rach
I am not one to give up on a book. I even slogged my way through The Bad Beginning last year, which I hated. But after reading the first few chapters of this book, I knew I couldn't waste my time on it. I even made a new shelf on Goodreads just to sort this book somewhere.

Yes, Chelsea Handler is a funny woman. I have watched her show, read her first book, and laughed at them. But I can't read about someone who treats their friends and family so horribly, seemingly rejoicing in their discomfort,...more
Toni Wulfekuhl
What a great way to write a book !! This was NOT written by Chelsea. Each chapter is written by a friend, co-worker etc telling of all the pranks Chelsea played on them. Wait til I tell my friends and family I want to be a Best Selling Author but THEY need to actually write the book, AND it better be good !!!
1st chapter was written by her producer, I was ready to call it quits. He wasn't that funny and made her come across as mean. I am currently most of the way through 2nd chapter and it's funn...more
Alexander Jackman
While not actually being written by Chelsea Handler (it's written by her friends and family and dog), Lies That Chelsea Handler told me utilizes the same wit and charm as her past works. This means that it is funny, shocking and raunchy and thoroughly entertaining to read.

I would recommend this book to anyone that enjoys any of Chelsea Handler's works being it her tv show(s) or her written words. Certainly if you are a fan of Chelsea Lately then this book is even more for you as the writers of t...more
Alexandra
If this book taught me anything, it's that I'm glad I'm not friends with Chelsea Handler. This book is about some of the pranks and lies she's told her friends and family over the years. They are humiliating and it seems she has no limits (family and your career don't seem to matter).

I really liked that the book was written by her friends and family, so we got to see how they feel about Chelsea and her pranks. I don't know how they do it. I would be in constant fear of being humiliated or being...more
Matty
Out of all of Chelsea Handler's books, this one is my favorite. Although it was nice to read about her antics from her own mouth, having her friends tell tales of how fucked up she is, well, it was refreshing.

There were absolutely times I laughed out loud and there were times where I almost thought she went too far but then I thought, she just as fucked up as I am.

The recurring theme in this book is that if Chelsea makes fun of you, she likes you and if she lies to you, she loves you. She's spu...more
Nicole Agadoni
I borrowed Lies that Chelsea Handler Told Me from a friend, and I enjoyed every second of it! I’ve always found Chelsea Handler to be hysterical on her show, and she proved to be just as hilarious on print when I read her first book a few years ago. This book is a little different because it is a collection of short stories and anecdotes from the people that know her best, her friends, family, and co-workers. This style of book is appealing to me because the voice and story changes every chapter...more
Brittany
Warning: if you do not like sarcasm, cursing, ridiculous pranks, and multiple stories of peeing in your pants from laughing so hard, do not even pick up this book. Though not the same as Chelsea's other books, still very entertaining. If you are ready for some laughs, some oh shit did she really do that moments, and adults playing big kid pranks, then this is the book for you. And please don't take it so seriously, if you do then Chelsea just pranked you!!
Sonya
Because you're a blond semi-successful comic and have a couple bestselling books, you apparently think it's awesome to terrorize people around you and related to you, probably for material--and then have them write another bestseller for you. Chelsea's pretty disturbed. Reading this book is like watching a car crash. Slowly. Unattractively. If this is what being a celebrity is, I want to be the farthest thing from it :/
Rachel C
Chelsea Handler is a super funny comedian and it's no wonder that she surrounds herself with very funny and well spoken people. This book kept me chuckling to the point of tears at one point.
Basically, this book is a collection of essays written by Chelsea's friends, family, and colleagues about all of the ridiculously hilarious jokes that have been pulled on them at one point or another whist working with Chelsea. I do not think people should read Chelsea's books for the content but rather for...more
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Aiossa's Senior 5...: Book Review #4 Allison Osborne 1 3 Dec 18, 2012 07:29PM  
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Chelsea Handler has become one of entertainment’s most sought after and versatile rising stars. In July 2007, Chelsea broke into the world of late-night talk shows with her E! Entertainment series, “Chelsea Lately,” airing weeknights at 11:00 p.m. Consistently the network’s highest-rated program, “Chelsea Lately” offers a tongue-in-cheek look at entertainment news, celebrity truths and rumors that...more
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