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Wabi Sabi Love: The Ancient Art of Finding Perfect Love in Imperfect Relationships

3.34  ·  Rating Details  ·  253 Ratings  ·  37 Reviews
Arielle Ford's Wabi Sabi Love follows the success of her international bestseller The Soulmate Secret by revealing how to make love last forever.

Using the ancient Japanese idea of illuminating the beauty in imperfection (known as wabi sabi), Wabi Sabi Love provides all the tools necessary for you to experience more balance, harmony, and joy in your relationship than ever b
ebook, 256 pages
Published January 3rd 2012 by HarperElixir (first published January 1st 2012)
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Aug 22, 2012 Christina rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Modern Lovers: take note of Arielle Ford, the smart couple's guide to thriving in an enduring relationship.

I've read a Dr. Laura book, and I can tell you to forget Dr. Laura and the Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage book she wrote.

Arielle Ford espouses a lot of the same things yet does so in a sane, logical way.

Move over, Dr. Laura: you're obsolete.

The new therapist is in: Arielle Ford. What she writes makes perfect sense. You will ignore Wabi Sabi love at your own peril.

It's one of the greate
Bea Elwood
It's a fact that happily married couples fight as often as couples headed for divorce, so what's the difference? It's how the disagreements are handled. The four deadly sins are Critism, Contempt, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. Need help breaking down your own defenses so you are a better communicator then I would recommend Wabi Sabi Love. A bit repeative but full of wonderful, real-life, illustrations; my favorite, the wife who's husband loves poppyseed bagels and eats one everyday. You can fo ...more
Jessica Rick
I love tiny books that pack a wallop. Arielle Ford lays down principles to guide relationships and provides real life examples of couples who have gone through problems and applied said principles.

So many little gems throughout! I highlighted many passages and points int he book. Here are a small handful that spoke to me: (i) "A twenty second hug releases the bonding hormone and neurotransmitter oxytocin" (ii) "Agree to explore than than solve. Research has shown that 70 percent of issues don't
I thought this was a great book about relationships -- mainly focusing on co-habitation with your significant other, and learning to deal with his/her quirks. There are several different scenarios given, with many examples of diverse couples going through something, so the characters Ford uses are relate-able to the reader in some capacity. A very interesting read for anyone in a relationship -- whether there are quirks or not.
Jun 05, 2012 Libby rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
The case studies of successful relationships make this book valuable (did you know that Barack Obama was a slob, dropping his clothes wherever?), but some of the author's advice--e.g., get involved with your partner's interests--seem less valuable. After all, one doesn't want to--nor should one--become a clone of your beloved. That said, though, there is helpful information here.
What is Wabi-sabi? Apart from a little catch-phrase that might help to sell the book? "Pared down to it's barest essence, wabi-sabi is the Japanese art of finding beauty in imperfection and profundity in nature, of accepting the natural cycle of growth, decay and death. It...reveres authenticiy above all. It celebrates cracks, crevices and all the other marks that time, weather, and loving use leave behind". Or from another source: "It is a Japanese asthetic, in which things are imperfect, imper ...more
May 11, 2015 Anne rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read2015
Ford has some excellent strategies but some mediocre execution and rather tired anecdotes, like the one about cutting the ends off the ham because Grandma always did it. Additionally, the examples and experience come from people who are childless or with 1-2 children and have 1-2 siblings, which limits the usefulness or universality of some of her ideas. After a while, I felt a little too strongly that I was not the target audience for this book, being on the other side of 40. Ai.
Jan 19, 2014 Lo rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
I am really unsure what this author was basing their 'sage advice' off of and this book left me wanting the entire time. Most of the advice given in this book could be taken horribly out of context and seems to admonish "ask not what you can do for yourself, but what you can for the person you've decided to attach yourself to".

Relationships are not easy, but they also shouldn't be forced, which the author seemed to advocate at times (i.e. teaching yourself to enjoy football so you and your sign
Jul 13, 2015 Monica rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
The examples were ridiculous. Your male partner loves sports? Your female partner loves shopping? Your partner has messy hair and doesn't care about it? These are not real problems or imperfections. The authors also seemed to be implying that the best way to overcome struggles in a relationship is to basically become your partner. Not for me or perhaps for anyone who takes a more individualistic approach to relationships.
Sep 03, 2014 Michele rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Through a series of love stories, Arielle provides concrete examples of the main idea of her book - There can be love and beauty in the imperfect. She demonstrates how to reshape your circumstances with your loved one so that the very things that annoy you about them can become the things you love about them. While the book is mostly themed toward romantic relationships, I found the lessons to be applicable to all of my favorite people on the planet. The POV offered in the book has given me some ...more
Angi Solley
A bit lame but at least it trickles in through my days as I'm reading it. Switching in and out of books with a storyline of course, while waiting to pick up the kids from TKD and such. Read in short bits, it's pleasurable.
Jun 18, 2012 Keeley rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I found this book so incredibly helpful! I read it just as my boyfriend and I were preparing to move in together and it helped me see all of the little irritations and flaws (on both of our parts) as part of the entire, perfect picture that is our relationship. Ford highlights real stories of real couples and uses them to illustrate lessons in accepting the flaws in yourself and your partner as beautiful, because it makes both of you who you are as a couple and as individuals. Whether you're sin ...more
Aug 04, 2013 Alyssa rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
It was extremely difficult for me to get through this book. Truth be told, I was adding a ton of library e-books to my wish list & accidentally added this one. Wabi Sabi in my rushed mind was supposed to be a cookbook or something interesting about wasabi. I should slow down & read the summaries before downloading. Anyhow, it's not about food at all. It's a relationship book & an extremely corny one at times (most of the time.) It has maybe two little gems of paragraphs that I highli ...more
Marjorie Elwood
I would have given this a 3.5 if I could have - I appreciated the suggestions and concepts, as well as some of the exercises to improve one's relationship, but it was fairly simplistic. In addition, there was one portion that annoyed me: it seemed as though she was promoting fawning over men and appearing less competent than you are in order to attract men, although others have told me that they didn't interpret the passage in the same fashion.
Jul 23, 2012 Valerie rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: selfhelp-romance
This is one of the best books I've read about relationship. This helps me to decide if I deserve to get marry or not. At first, I really don't like to get into relationship because I am very devastated but after reading this book, it changes my thinking and realize I love to experience to have a good relationship. I thought guys have a big problem but I was wrong. I highly recommend this book for those who want to succeed in marriage. ;)
Oct 06, 2013 IvyLaArtista rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: i-own, divine-love
This is a great read for those who want to discover the art of loving another by embracing their imperfections as part of what makes them perfect. It was definitely an easy, entertaining read that will keep you engaged. Arielle Ford seems to be writing it with the married person in mind, but I think it's great material for those in relationships or even preparation if you want to be in a healthy relationship one day. I recommend it!
Amy Lesher
Wabi Sabi is an ancient Japanese art form that seeks to find the perfection in the imperfection. Keeping this in mind, we are continually reminded to see the positives in the negatives--to find the gift that is always there. Full of real-life "couple" transformation stories followed by practical perception- and relationship-altering exercises. An easy, insightful read for anyone looking to be reminded of the silver lining.
Aug 01, 2012 Amy rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This book is an easy, typical self-help read that had some good principles in it. Some were based on the art of wabi sabi while others seemed to be more in alignment with cognitive therapy - changing the way you think about the imperfections of your partner. There was a good definition of intimacy in the book and examples of real couples struggling to come to terms with their differences in each chapter.
This book contained some good points to improve love relationships, but I felt the author frequent endorsement/advertisement of her sister/friend/acquaintance etc. books non-genuine and not always relevant to the points she is trying to get across.
Also, the fact that she uses her own love story as a model relationship e.g. "Me and Brian did this/ Me and Brian tried that" becomes tiring after a while.
Nov 08, 2013 Jill rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
i liked the concept of Wabi Sabi Love (Wabi Sabi, the Japanese concept of the perfection in imperfection). But this is really just another talk-show self-help book, where every anecdotal relationship ends in some kind of positive lesson. It's just kind of lame...some of the ideas got me thinking from a different perspective, but overall it is just a little too pat to be inspiring.
Aug 07, 2014 Royale rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
3.5 Great perspective, but fairly basic. Could have been a bit more substantial.
Mar 12, 2012 Dani rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A terrific book to read when your significant other is really, really, really getting on your nerves. It'll help you lighten up a lot. The bottom line is that it's our expectation of perfection that gets in the way of two imperfect people having a great relationship that only gets better over time. Read it. It'll make you feel better.
Regina Hunter
Do not get me wrong, book is lovely, caring and nice, but human with any common sense can figure these things out by themselves. If person does not want to do these things willingly without anyone telling him otherwise, either person is a moron, or he doesn't want to be in a relationship.
Jul 20, 2012 Hazel rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: spiritual
I started reading this book & wasn't buying what Ford was saying. It seemed to me that she was basically saying you had to put up with whatever annoying behaviour your partner does. So I quickly lost interest in this book, quit reading it & returned it to the library.
Jennifer Barry
This is a great book that addresses the imperfection of couples and how embracing the imperfections or differences can change our perception and love. Arielle is great at weaving personal stories through meaningful lessons and concepts.
Mar 28, 2012 MelJoy rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
If you've read other "self-help" relationship books, you've read this one already. Arielle has a unique label for what others have written and suggested before. Someone will read this book and find something new, perhaps.
Brooke Colbert
Sep 18, 2012 Brooke Colbert rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This concept was new to me and I loved it! If you are a self help sponge this one is for you. If you like/need to step outside your comfort zone, who doesn't, this one is a quick read that could help broaden your horizons.
Jun 11, 2012 Bradley rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: 2012
I really love the premise of this book. Wabi Sabi is trying to make peace with the imperfections of life. I like to think of it as finding the beauty in the brokenness.
May 29, 2012 Joann rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Enjoyed this in the big picture, but got bogged down in some of the too-cute stories. Did have some insights...
Jan 06, 2013 Mripma rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I like admitting imperfection and this book was all about that.
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Arielle Ford has spent the past 25 years living and promoting consciousness through all forms of media. She is one of the founding partners of the Spiritual Cinema Circle, a DVD club dedicated to providing movies about love and compassion. She is the author of seven books, including the Hot Chocolate for the Mystical Soul series and her newest book, The Soulmate Secret: Manifest The Love of Your L ...more
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“When the Japanese mend broken objects, they fill the cracks with gold. They believe that when something’s suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful.—Barbara Bloom” 2 likes
“Ring the bells that still can ring; forget your perfect offering. There is a crack in everything; that’s how the light gets in.” 0 likes
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