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English as a Second F*cking Language: How to Swear Effectively, Explained in Detail with Numerous Examples Taken From Everyday Life
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English as a Second F*cking Language: How to Swear Effectively, Explained in Detail with Numerous Examples Taken From Everyday Life

3.82  ·  Rating Details ·  310 Ratings  ·  39 Reviews
In the English language, swearing is essential to effective communication. In this hilarious and illuminating guide, you will learn just how to do it - no f*cking problem.

Whether you want to succeed in business, school, or social circles, a strong command of vocabulary is absolutely necessary. Just imagine a stranger to our shores, trying to comprehend the following conve
ebook, 96 pages
Published June 15th 1996 by St. Martin's Griffin (first published June 1996)
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Roland Volz
Nov 01, 2009 Roland Volz rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: language
A thin book, this covers the "seven words you can't say on television" and somewhat more. Each term is highlighted, defined in proper dictionary style, synonyms are given and explored, and examples and counter-examples are considered for the differences between men and women. The book's title is exactly right: if you learned English as a second language, and all the primary English-speakers you know are too proper to talk to you about swear words, then this is the essential book for you. I'm goi ...more
Lyuba Pachoma
Nov 01, 2016 Lyuba Pachoma rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
A Curious book with many useful and unknown expressions :-D
Alex Telander
Warning: this review contains graphic language.

While not new to publishing (release in 1996), this book is a necessary swear word compendium for any English lover. Author Sterling Johnson, a professor who has been teaching English as a second language for over twenty years, brings us a complete breakdown of swearing in the English language: each chapter begins with the particular swear word, gives a rundown of the various forms it may be used in, as well as full examples of how specifically to u
Sep 14, 2007 Tracey rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: ESL teachers to assist students learning with the finer points of vulgarity
I believe my mom bought me English as a Second F*cking Language: How to Swear Effectively, Explained in Detail with Numerous Examples Taken From Everyday Life for me at some point (which seems appropriate, as I inherited my tendency to curse like a sailor when angry or frustrated from her.) I picked it up this time so I could claim to have finished at least one book in the past two weeks!

Written more or less as a straight language instruction guide, Johnson explores the usages of the Universal
Cathy Douglas
Mar 24, 2009 Cathy Douglas rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: reference-books
I cherry-picked this handy little reference volume while sorting library sale books. Real-life swearing doesn't make use of anywhere near the full spectrum of possibilities, and this book will bring new life to anyone's vocabulary. Between this book and the Urban Dictionary, one has access to a veritable thesaurus of the profane. Why merely "beat meat" when you can "choke the chicken"? How else does one know it's cool to "eat," but skanky to "eat the weenie"? Where else can one find all the vari ...more
Mar 28, 2016 Androo rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Not as exhaustive as other texts, this book's author really screwed the pooch on this one. (Coincidentally, you will not find that phrase in the book but rather 'fucking the dog.')

An excellent primer for those who have never watched television or interacted with an English-speaking human before. Otherwise, it will not add to the etymologist's library.

The book screams 'Rush job' with its barebones intro, dust jacket and contents. I have not seen more generously spaced pages since teaching freshma
Aug 17, 2009 Melissa rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
At times outrageously funny, at other times perplexing; some of the phrasing was dated. (Boob is a confusing word because it can mean "tit" or "a dumb person"? Has anyone actually been called a "boob" since the advent of color television?) Also, the book wasn't quite as exhaustive as I'd like: he missed plenty of colorful phrases like the English "take the piss out of" and, despite a lengthy listing of euphemisms related to masturbation, he inexplicably failed to include "spank the monkey."
I think I was expecting more from this than what I got - I wanted it to be a true grammar and vocab book, not just a random listing of more or less useful swear words ("ass eyes," really?). Frankly, I learned more from watching Boondock Saints and spending a night in an Irish pub during the World Cup than I did from this book. Disappointing, and not even that funny.
I finished this a while back. It's entertaining enough, but of course there's something a little mind-numbing about reading an entire book--or, since I'm an idiot, two entire books in a row--about swearing. I also don't really like scatological swear words so that was sort of annoying to me. But the section on the word "fuck" is worth the price of admission.
This one was given to me by friends who'd heard a lot of stories about weird things that would come up in the course of teaching advanced ESL classes. I wouldn't really recommend this book to actual's more a novelty item, it's not all that complete, and it's pretty crass. But it IS funny!
Epoch of Entropy
You can utterly respect the author's intent of sincerity, and in fact, covers the topic at hand effectively. But, as an American, and reading the British take on swearing to non-english speakers... This book is fantastically funny.

And, you'll be sure next time you need to swear, you'll be syntactically correct!
May 15, 2011 Bookish rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: nonfiction, read-2011
You'd think with that title that it would be better than it was. I thought it was sort basic and elementary, and frankly, there were a lot of really great swears left out. As it turns out, this is "beginner swearing" - I kid you not, and it's definitely evident when you read it. It was ok...I've come up with (much) better swears myself, and much more creative usage.
Willa Grant
Dec 16, 2008 Willa Grant rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I just re-read this book. I could be dying & this book would make me laugh- it is laid out just like any other language guide which makes it all the more hysterical. I am sure this proves my immaturity rather than how f*ckin funny this book is.
Cannonhistory Potter
I read this a couple of years ago and nearly wet myself...quick read, requires nothing more than a suspension of normal sensativities. Think how funny this would be if it actually served as a language immersion book for ESL folk.
Willa Grant
Aug 09, 2012 Willa Grant rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This is the funniest book ever! I could have just found out I was dying & I would laugh when I read this book. It is written just like any other phrase book but it is "profanity" & how to use it correctly. An abosolute gem for those of us who are still immature. ;-)
Jan 26, 2010 CoolBreeze1978 rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
An in depth exploration of the intricate and subtle rules of swearing effectively in the English language. It's detailed outlines provide a treasure chest of writing devices for the more than status quo fucking writer.
F*ing funny. As I learned my English from American college kids, I already knew almost all the words and expressions in this little book, but it's still entertaining as it's written in a very humorous way.
Steve Mitchell
Swearing is not as simple as you may think. Just peppering your language with expletives is not big and it is not clever; you need to be economical and select the right word for the situation. This book will help you learn to utter profanities with confidence.
Nov 12, 2008 Aldean rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: laughs
Not a book to be taken seriously (at least, not in this reviewer's humble opinion), this slender volume was the source of much mirth to my entire circle of friends. A taboo-free primer on the bluer shades of the English languages.
Linda Aull
Feb 28, 2010 Linda Aull rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
Funny in places, but not nearly as funny as I wanted it to be. At least it was over pretty quickly.
Jan 03, 2015 Leo rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
El libro que te enseña como decir tacos con propiedad en inglés. Imprescindible para malhabladas como yo.
Sep 12, 2012 Sandra rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Not only a non-reread, it isn't even a keeper. Perhaps some people get a laugh or two out of the examples; I'm not one of those people.
Dec 20, 2009 David rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor
A blunt and witty evaluation and guidebook to effective swearing. Good for some chuckles and a few hearty laughs!
Маx Nestelieiev
Jul 15, 2013 Маx Nestelieiev rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: english
funny and pretty goofy book, everyone has to read it instead of enjoying the radio named K.C.U.F. :)
Jan 15, 2012 B rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
short read, good fun.

as an actual english teacher i would have liked it to be aimed for actual second language learners ,though.
Bharat rated it really liked it
Sep 20, 2012
Heather rated it it was amazing
Dec 20, 2008
Josh Sigmond
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Apr 02, 2014
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Aug 26, 2013
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Aug 11, 2013
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Sterling Johnson--pseudonym of California writer Jeffrey Whitmore--is the author of the St. Martin's Press bestseller ENGLISH AS A SECOND F*CKING LANGUAGE ("Great f*cking book!"--Stephen King) and WATCH YOUR F*CKING LANGUAGE ("One of those rare smart and funny books."--Penn Jillette).

Whitmore is also the author of the 55-word classic "Bedtime Story" ("rather wonderful"--The Cambridge Introduction
More about Sterling Johnson...

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