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The No Hellos Diet
by
Sam Pink
"The thought of calling off work is like the thought of suicide, just nice to think about."
In The No Hellos Diet, Sam Pink brings you straight into a world you've never been to before -- your own life. Find yourself working at a department store where everyone must wear red and khaki clothing. Find yourself throwing out garbage for fifty cents more than minimum wage. Find...more
In The No Hellos Diet, Sam Pink brings you straight into a world you've never been to before -- your own life. Find yourself working at a department store where everyone must wear red and khaki clothing. Find yourself throwing out garbage for fifty cents more than minimum wage. Find...more
Paperback, 88 pages
Published
August 16th 2011
by Lazy Fascist Press
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This is a sequel to Person written like a sperm. Cause it's heavy in the front but it wiggle tails real light toward the end. If you read Person and wanted more then open your mouth and swallow this.
Likes:
1) When he says uh-oh. I kinda fast-read to get to the parts where he says uh-oh, so I could just giggle manically for awhile.
2) When the girl says "red light". [spoiler alert, a girl says "red light" in No Hellos Diet] that was sweet and made me feel like less of a monster even though it did...more
Likes:
1) When he says uh-oh. I kinda fast-read to get to the parts where he says uh-oh, so I could just giggle manically for awhile.
2) When the girl says "red light". [spoiler alert, a girl says "red light" in No Hellos Diet] that was sweet and made me feel like less of a monster even though it did...more
There was never a book that never made me feel as shitty about my life as this one.
Yet there was never a book a related to more.
And that's just the worst feeling.
This book was about retail life, and how it sucks, and how despite it's shitty waiting room feel, it was better than being in your shitty apartment all day.
Each character that worked at the retail store reminded me of someone at my store. The back room stories reminded me of my back room stories. It was all a sad, satirical story. Eve...more
Yet there was never a book a related to more.
And that's just the worst feeling.
This book was about retail life, and how it sucks, and how despite it's shitty waiting room feel, it was better than being in your shitty apartment all day.
Each character that worked at the retail store reminded me of someone at my store. The back room stories reminded me of my back room stories. It was all a sad, satirical story. Eve...more
This book...it is really something special.
George Carlin once talked about the way he came up with his material. He said there were two worlds. The "BIG" world, which involves lofty concepts like politics, and global issues stuff.
The second world, the "SMALL" world, dealt with more personal things. Observations on the self, existentialism, and what not.
Sam Pink is a master of the Small World. He understands what it means to be a person, a REAL person, to work at some awful job that you hate but...more
George Carlin once talked about the way he came up with his material. He said there were two worlds. The "BIG" world, which involves lofty concepts like politics, and global issues stuff.
The second world, the "SMALL" world, dealt with more personal things. Observations on the self, existentialism, and what not.
Sam Pink is a master of the Small World. He understands what it means to be a person, a REAL person, to work at some awful job that you hate but...more
Sam Pink is pretty good. He makes acutely interesting observations about the everyday in ways that most writers don't. Here, however, he doesn't do much to unify those observations with any real thematic glue other than the loneliness and ennui of being consciously average and unremarkable. I may or may not read Person next, but from what I've heard, it seems as though Sam Pink keeps writing the same novel over and over again, only instead of drastically changing certain story elements or tone (...more
from publisher
Read 3/29/12 - 4/3/12
4 Stars - Strongly Recommended to readers who enjoy the humdrum of the everyday
88 pages (eBook/PDF)
Publisher: Lazy Fascist Press
We've all been there, unless we were born with a silver spoon in our mouths. Whether it was your first job or an in-between pocket-filler as you attempted to sort your shitty life out... I'm talking about those grueling, humiliating, horrendously mind numbing minimum wage positions we suddenly found ourselves in.
Mine was a part time po...more
Read 3/29/12 - 4/3/12
4 Stars - Strongly Recommended to readers who enjoy the humdrum of the everyday
88 pages (eBook/PDF)
Publisher: Lazy Fascist Press
We've all been there, unless we were born with a silver spoon in our mouths. Whether it was your first job or an in-between pocket-filler as you attempted to sort your shitty life out... I'm talking about those grueling, humiliating, horrendously mind numbing minimum wage positions we suddenly found ourselves in.
Mine was a part time po...more
You live in Chicago. You have been dumped by your girlfriend. She has left you with an empty apartment. You have a job similar to that of a stock clerk at Target. You don't really have any friends, and spend much of your time alone, or with your ex-girlfriend who keeps popping up randomly, or engaging in meaningless yet amusing conversations with co-workers, or buying a child's mattress so you have something to sleep on. This is your life. Enjoy.
Pink has an uncanny knack for making the everyday...more
Pink has an uncanny knack for making the everyday...more
one my favourite writer's from the bizarro/alt lit world. Honest, direct, sensitive without the boring pathos etc. Gritty without trying to be hipster gritty. Moving. Like the best of Miranda July flicks. Attempting to connect with others but honest with alienation as well. Love the writing of this Sam Pink fella!!
I made a video of me reading the first half of this book out loud: http://vimeo.com/29996731
Then I read the second half to myself. Mostly while walking around town.
It is similar to Person but also different in many ways.
May fav part was when when the main person was hanging out with Sour Cream
Then I read the second half to myself. Mostly while walking around town.
It is similar to Person but also different in many ways.
May fav part was when when the main person was hanging out with Sour Cream
I can't remember, but is this the one where the protagonist works in the warehouse of a department store? Or is that Person? I don't know, I read this and Person basically three days apart so they're kind of melding together in my head. They're both really hilarious though.
Neo fucking decapitates a guy with some kind of steel rod or something in that third Matrix movie. Did you remember that? I didn't. And then I saw it happen again. Damn. Beheaded as all get-out. This book is a six. A compact slice of a terrible life that plays out in the best way.
I'm not a writer, so it's difficult for me to criticize a book when I've written nothing more than a Facebook post that people actually find funny.
This is the second book that I've read from Sam Pink, but I didn't like either one of them. I gave it three stars because I respect the urge to create something totally different, but I couldn't help but to feel that this book was written in this style because the author couldn't resist the urge to use the word "you." The style isn't for me, but I can...more
This is the second book that I've read from Sam Pink, but I didn't like either one of them. I gave it three stars because I respect the urge to create something totally different, but I couldn't help but to feel that this book was written in this style because the author couldn't resist the urge to use the word "you." The style isn't for me, but I can...more
sam pink you are really funny and sad
i want to hug you
but i would be too scared
so i would probably just buy you an apple
and all of your books.
i want to hug you
but i would be too scared
so i would probably just buy you an apple
and all of your books.
This is the best book I've read so far in my life. And I've read other books too. This is much better than those other ones.
I don't even know how to describe this book except the guy it is about, I kind of want to give him a hug, but I kind of don't.
I really fucking liked this book. I sat and read it in one sitting. Feels like cozy depression.
liked this a lot but lots of problematic stereotypes that i could have done without
This book made me want to get a job somewhere similar to Target, so I could have a friend nicknamed Sour Cream.
Seems as if I owe somebody a can-opener.
My twenty-eighth birthday is next week...
Catcher in the Rye + Bukowski + American Psycho = Sam Pink.
May 24, 2013
Meghan
marked it as to-read
May 23, 2013
Cameron McLeod
marked it as to-read
May 23, 2013
Jenn
marked it as to-read
May 22, 2013
Ruth
marked it as to-read
May 22, 2013
J.C.
marked it as to-read
May 20, 2013
natercopia
marked it as to-read
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Sam Pink is the author of The No Hellos Diet, Hurt Others, I Am Going to Clone Myself Then Kill the Clone and Eat It, Frowns Need Friends Too, and the cult hit Person. His writing has been published widely in print and on the internet, and also in other languages. He lives in Chicago, where he plays in the band Depressed Woman.
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Dec 11, 2012 06:47am