Secrets of the Baby Whisperer: How to Calm, Connect, and Communicate with Your Baby

by Tracy Hogg, Melinda Blau

book data

876 ratings, 3.82 average rating, 303 reviews (more data...)

rating	frequency	%
5		30%
4		35%
3		22%
2		9%
1		2%

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published

January 30th 2001 by Ballantine Books

binding

Hardcover, 304 pages

isbn

0345440757 (isbn13: 9780345440754)

description

The last thing new parents can find time for is quiet reading, so many helpful books on infant care rely on bullet points and a "let's get to th...more

[close] The last thing new parents can find time for is quiet reading, so many helpful books on infant care rely on bullet points and a "let's get to the point" writing style. Tracy Hogg, a neonatal nurse, teacher, and mother of two, uses these techniques to good effect in Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. Focusing on newborns and their parents, her simple programs are a blend of intelligent intuition and methods based on years of experience. The first half of the book is devoted to E.A.S.Y--her name for creating a structured daily routine for you and your baby that makes the most of your baby's awake times and also leaves time just for you. These concepts aren't designed to force your bundle of joy into not following her body's needs, but rather to create a feasible middle ground between total rigidity and on-demand food and sleep (and no time for mom to shower). If it still strikes you as too regimented, keep reading. The author makes room for differences in personal style and includes short quizzes to determine whether you're a "planner" or a "winger", and what level of daily structure you are likely to find helpful. In the same chapter, she identifies five general temperaments of infants, how to get an accurate feel for yours, and what methods of care are likely to be the most effective for his temperament. Her statement that babies prefer routine is backed up by research from the University of Denver. While most of the book relies on anecdotes to get the points across, Hogg does find room to back up some of her statements with quotes from various researchers and institutions. Included at the end of the book are assurances that E.A.S.Y. can be followed even with a colicky baby or one who's been ruling the roost for the first few months. Frustrated parents might like to read the last page first: "all the baby-whispering advice in the world is useless unless you're having a good time being a parent" is an excellent reminder to enjoy this time with all of its ups and downs. --Jill Lightner [close]

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other reviews (showing 1-20 of 1034)

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April rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

10/05/08

Read in October, 2008

recommended to April by: Britt-Marie
recommends it for: new moms, pregnant moms, anyone planning on having kids

I really loved this book. I will recommend it to everyone who would like to understand how their baby communicates. I really feel like I can understand what my babies are saying and asking. I like the author's style of writing because I felt like she was my friend and right here helping me.

People complain that she bases everything off of experience and not science and that she doesn't know anything about breastfeeding. Well, I've read two la Leche League books and I really have had ...more I really loved this book. I will recommend it to everyone who would like to understand how their baby communicates. I really feel like I can understand what my babies are saying and asking. I like the author's style of writing because I felt like she was my friend and right here helping me.

People complain that she bases everything off of experience and not science and that she doesn't know anything about breastfeeding. Well, I've read two la Leche League books and I really have had enough of their information, so her ideas were refreshing and helped me to not feel guilty about my decisions to cut back on my breastfeeding the boys so that I can be a better mother to them. You obviously feed hungry babies and you don't go longer than 3 hours between feedings until your baby is 4 months old. So, it seems right on to me.

I LOVE her ideas about flexible routines: E.A.S.Y (Eat, Awake, Sleep, "You"). It's not as rigorous as Babywise and it's very baby friendly. You learn how to read your baby's cues and to know what their language means. I am calmer around my boys and I move slower too. She has great ideas about calm baths and my boys haven't cried once since I started following her advice. She describes infant massage in a way I can understand.

Where sleep problems are concerned, her ideas are the best for us. She isn't for making a baby crying it out alone, nor does she take the polar opposite of sleeping with your baby and feeding them all night long. You stay with your baby at their crib and help them fall asleep w/o you rocking and holding them for hours. This has saved our lives because we were rocking Clark to sleep for hours and he'd wake up screaming as soon as his little body touched the crib. After your baby is 3 months old, she has a Pick Up, Put Down method where you pick up your baby and soothe them but as soon as that need is met you lay them back down. (This is if you've done "accidental parenting" which is what we did and you need to fix your problems).

If you already have big problems or you need to help your baby learn to sleep in their own crib after sleeping with you, please read this book before you make them cry it out :-) If it doesn't work and CIO is best for you, then by all means, do that. She says that too. Tom and I have tried PU/PD for two days now and we had to pick up Clark 23 times the first night, five the second, and tonight he went down the first time.

She also has a DVD that I checked out from the library. More great info on that as well.

She has a second book "The baby Whisperer Solves all Your Problems" which is if you are starting her method after your baby is born and you have problems. I'm reading this one right now and it is a necessity if your baby is already here or older than 3 months.

Anyway, that's my review.

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2 comments

Hannah rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

08/23/07

bookshelves: raising_babies_and_children

Read in November, 2006

recommends it for: new and expectant parents

My big take-aways from this book:

1) Slow down with your baby - go at your newborn's pace, which is way, way slower than you'd expect

2) Respect your baby's personhood - develop an attitude toward your baby like they are a person who is in the room, which they are! Let them know what you're going to do next ("Now we're going to change your diaper... Now it's time to eat... Now it's time to go to sleep...")

3) Give your newborn a tour of the house when ...more

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Damecatoe rated it:

08/15/07

bookshelves: non-fic

Read in April, 2007

recommends it for: pregnant women, first time moms

I knew zilch about babies, so my friend picked this up for me at the library. In those first few weeks, I found the book helpful because it had charts to help with understanding a baby's cues.

When my son was less than 6 weeks old, I thought the author's E.A.S.Y. method was bunk. I mean, if a baby wants to fall asleep while eating, no cajoling seems to help. But by the time he was 2-3 months old, I realized he was on E.A.S.Y. - eat, activity, sleep, you time. And I was saner for it. ...more

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CS rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

02/19/08

Read in September, 2006

recommends it for: no one

At first the advice in this book seemed so logical that I was excited to have a plan for how to be a mom for the first time. Once my son arrived, I decided that this book was evil.

Hogg's basic idea isn't terrible - it's the guilt she assigns to anyone who doesn't use or can't follow her method. I was in tears more than once because I felt like a failure when her advice wasn't working. One day I literally threw the book against a wall with frustration. I think that action surprise...more

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3 comments

Carol rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

02/28/08

bookshelves: reference

This book was recommended to me by a friend. I found it really helpful, although the author goes a bit overboard with the mnemonic devices. I liked that she gave some useful tools for how to provide babies with structure & guidance. The best thing was that she taught me it was ok to pause before reacting/responding to whatever my baby was doing. And that the best way to parent is to respect your baby as a person with his/her own personality, interests, likes & dislikes (which is harde...more

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Christina rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

02/15/08

Has a copy to sell/swap — Read in February, 2003

Well, I would definitely have to say this book has good points and not so good points. There are some very useful tips in this book, however it all needs to be taken to heart with a good dose of reality. It is very important to begin to get your child on a routine as early as possible, but let's be real, you are never going to get a 3 day old newborn to space feedings out to 3 or 4 hours between each one. Neither are you going to get your newborn to sleep through the night right out of the ga...more

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Elizabeth rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

01/08/08

bookshelves: parenting--newborns-

Has a copy to sell/swap — Read in May, 2006

recommended to Elizabeth by: I dare not say!
recommends it for: Absolutely no one

I found this book completely useless and actually ridiculously funny at times because it was just so off. This may work for Tracy Hogg's celebrity clientele who have nannies taking care of their children but it is pretty useless for hands-on Moms. Her tone is annoying (she keeps referring to the reader as "ducky"). Try reading Dr. Harvey Karp's (yes a real MD!) "Happiest Baby on the Block"--a much better and more useful read. We use this book to elevate my son's mattress w...more

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Christina rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

11/21/08

bookshelves: nonfiction-reference

Read in August, 2008

recommended to Christina by: Mariah Esko

Practical advice on helping your baby establish an "E.A.S.Y." routine of Eat, Activity, Sleep, You. It includes tips & practical advice for each step - baby massage, bathing, getting to sleep, age appropriate activities, and more. She also gives advice on overcoming bad habits.

This is a down-to-earth guide with lots of practical ideas. She has a fun writing style & a lot of personal baby experience. I even liked her proper British writing style.

I per...more

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Chandra rated it:

(review of isbn )

10/21/08

bookshelves: non-fiction, parenting

The good:
-Author has a calm, respectful attitude towards babies.
-There is some genuinely good advice sprinkled through out.

The bad:
-The 'sequence' (EASY: Eat, Activity, Sleep, You Time) is laughable at best, creepy and controlling at worst. (Anyone who can get their newborn baby to fall into a 'sequence' like this either deserves a medal or lucked out with the easiest baby in the world).
-The breast feeding advice is subpar and could potentially inter...more

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5 comments

Jessie rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

09/15/08

bookshelves: parenting-books

Read in September, 2008

recommends it for: Formula feeding moms who are also not into attachment parenting

This book has horrible misinformation on breastfeeding. The storage time for breastmilk is WRONG, and it even says to shake breastmilk after warming (breastmilk should only be swirled, shaking is bad for it), and her method of feeding a newborn only every 4 hours would lead to not enough milk production for most mums.

Most of this book was fluff. Some of it was flatout wrong from what I've seen with my baby - she says mobiles are of no use until baby is 2 months old, but my baby has ...more

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Jodi rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

08/05/08

Read in August, 2008

recommended to Jodi by: Jaime

Loved it! It has reinstated my sanity. Jack is less fussy now as I am better interpreting his cues and knowing what to expect with his schedule actually allows me to plan a little. It has greatly reduced my stress. The E-A-S-Y schedule is brilliant, except for the Y (Your time) part has become Rocky's time. Somehow, I will have to fit myself in somewhere. This is my only criticism: I wish it talked about juggling a toddler with a new baby. This book is perfect for a new parent, but some of the s...more

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3 comments

outside247 rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

06/30/08

bookshelves: non-fiction

Read in June, 2008

recommends it for: New parents

I feel like I can't really rate this book until I can try out some of the author's advice, but with that being said, I though this book contained good advice for new parents. So much of it just seemed to be good common sense. My favorite bit of advice was "Start as you mean to go on". What she means by that is that if you don't want to have to carry around a 30lb toddler to get him/her to go to sleep, you shouldn't start by doing it while he/she's a newborn. Because of that advice ...more

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2 comments

Emily added it (review of isbn 0345479092)

04/14/08

Read in February, 2008

Another baby book that is not based on science or research but rather one person’s experience. That said, even despite her trying to sound like she’s your friend throughout the book by addressing the reader in colloquial terms, I did learn some things which she, just like the best baby on the block author, conveniently summarized on a few pages. Here’s my notes from her summary in case you can’t just photocopy her summary pages:

0-4 months
- remove baby from the breas...more

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Alicia rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

12/17/08

For me with all parenting/baby books, I don't believe in one person's opinion/theory 100% however, I agreed with a lot of this. I especially liked how it helped to add structure from pretty much the start of a baby's life (as I am a structure/routine freak). I have found that it follows a lot of the Parenting with Love and Logic and T. Berry Brazelton's books, which we tend to agree with. I just found this in a bookstore one day and I'm so glad I did!

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Adrienne rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

08/15/08

Read in August, 2008

recommended to Adrienne by: my older sister
recommends it for: anyone, mainly moms or soon-to-be

I'm loving this book so far! It points out so many good things about understanding babies and how to read their cues and begin routines. I gotta hurry and finish, only 7 weeks left until baby comes!

I LOVE THIS BOOK! The E.A.S.Y. method that Tracy talks about really works! It takes time to get it started and to figure out how it will work for your unique situation, but it really does work! Basically it's this: Eat, Activity, Sleep/You Time. It really helps for baby not to depend...more

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Alicia rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

01/02/09

bookshelves: 2008-reads

Read in November, 2008

this book at first seemed ideal to help me get my daughter to sleep, as she wouldn't sleep anywhere at all, pretty much. It was recommended by a friend, but what I found was that it was so inordinately complex, there was no way I could follow her steps when my daughter was crying. I thought it would be a great no-crying method for sleep, but it is incredibly impractical and made me feel inept.

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polly rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

08/14/08

Read in February, 2008

This book is b/w 2 and 3 stars for me. It was okay and I liked some of it (her desire not to let a baby scream for hours for instance, that seems commendable). I think it's a good idea not to let a baby fall asleep nursing--I was able to do that until teething began and then that little plan was out the window! It is really good to try to learn to read your baby's cues. I definitely liked that part of the book.

The things I did not like--

calling the reader 'luv'--a fe...more

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Julie rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

04/07/08

bookshelves: baby

Read in June, 2007

This was my favorite baby book that I read. Tracy Hogg is British - sometimes reminiscent of the Super Nanny - and is interesting and clever. I felt so prepared for those first days and weeks home from the hospital after following her advice. My favorite thing about the book is that she helps you evaluate your baby's temperament and parent accordingly (for example, I could tell right away that my son had certain qualities of Hogg's Touchy Baby description and so he needed to stay with a pretty c...more

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2 comments

Erin rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

01/02/09

Let me say from experience that this book is b.s. It did nothing but frustrate me during the infant days. Granted, I think it has a point when it talks about getting to know your child's personality, but I'll be damned if my child fit neatly into any description they had. I think it just added to my confusion.

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Kelsey rated it:

(review of isbn 0345479092)

12/04/08

It's similar to On Becoming Babywise in regard to baby's eating and sleeping habits. And in needing to decipher your child's different crys/needs rather than hushing the cries in general.

There are supplementary chapters on breastfeeding, colic and relationship expectations that are most definitely helpful.

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