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Hello Kitty Must Die

3.34  ·  Rating Details ·  1,783 Ratings  ·  317 Reviews
On the outside, twenty-eight-year-old Fiona Yu appears to be just another Hello Kitty--an educated, well-mannered Asian American woman. Secretly, she feels torn between the traditional Chinese values of her family and the social mores of being an American girl.

To escape the burden of carrying her family's honor, Fiona decides to take her own virginity. In the process, she
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ebook, 320 pages
Published April 1st 2010 by Tyrus Books
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(showing 1-30 of 2,910)
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Melki
Jul 28, 2014 Melki rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humorous-fiction
When will I ever learn?

Once again, I was sucked in by a great title, then kicked in the butt by mediocrity.

When an egomaniacal lawyer with a deep admiration for serial killers meets up with her old school chum, a guy who was once sent to juvie for setting a fellow student on fire, sparks fly, and it seems like a match made in Heaven Hell. But unfortunately, not in a cute, funny, what-if-Wednesday-Addams-found-her-true-love way.

It's more like Sex and the City had a one-nighter with American Psyc
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Marvin
Aug 05, 2011 Marvin rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: humor
First line: "It all started with a missing hymen."

Thus starts a fictional memoir whose first chapter features rants about body parts I don't have and sex aids I've never used. It is dark and hilarious, the way I like my comedies, yet I wondered if the author has the ability to continue in such a strong manner.

The premise is strong. Fiona is a "Hello Kitty" Chinese-American stuck between modern America and Chinese cultural norms. She is a 28 year old lawyer who is also a virgin and lives at home.
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Anna
Jan 12, 2012 Anna rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: apl, 2012
Wait, what happened? I had added a longer, detailed review for this one. Did one of the small GR server outages/updates kill it a few nights ago? :(

I could not resist the book, the title was too irresistible. Fiona Yu is a Chinese-American lawyer who is 28 and lives with her parents, who want to marry her to a nice (enough) Chinese-American man. Fiona isn't keen on the idea of getting married, and enjoys more her life as a single (who also has a nice male ... parakeet in her life). So she takes
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Vonnie Stewart
Aug 06, 2011 Vonnie Stewart rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
What a different, crazy, cool story to read. The protagonist (Fiona) is an asexual young Asian woman sociopath giving her cold views on the world. Her best friend (Sean) is a serial killer white man whom she's known since grade school and their dialogue/world views are immensely interesting to read.

"The sweet smell of death. Thick, toxic, intoxicating. It made me giddy. It gave me weak orgasms."

He was the product of an abusive home with an overly sexual mother and she has overbearing parents w
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Diane
Jun 27, 2010 Diane rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Be careful of this one if you don't like dark humor. Would be good for fans of Dexter. Part social commentary on cultural expectations for asian american women, part moral commentary on what would you do if someone you knew was doing illegal things but you benefited like hell from it, part feminist anthem in taking control of your own destiny. I liked this author's voice very much and thought her fearlessness on her chosen story for a first-time novelist is to be admired. I will look forward to ...more
Alexandra
Feb 06, 2015 Alexandra rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: belletristik, humor
Die einzige Frage bei dieser Geschichte war: Kann, und darf mir nach Dumb House ein leichter Roman mit schwarzem Humor über ein witziges Psychopathenpärchen, das mordend durch die Gegend läuft überhaupt gefallen? Ob es das darf kann ich nicht beurteilen, aber es hat mir gefallen :D. Die Unterhaltung ist zwar leicht, aber genau das bezweckt ja dieses Werk. Die kuriosen Figuren strotzen nur so von guten Einfällen der Autorin. Sean hat sich als Psychopath von Kindheitstagen an eine äußerst erfolgr ...more
Elle
Dec 11, 2010 Elle rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I think that when you pick up this book, it goes without saying that you are going to take it with a grain of salt. It's about an Asian American woman whose family follows traditional Chinese culture living in a world where the old traditions no longer make the same kind of sense to her. To contrast the seemingly subservient culture presented by the protagonist, there is the very American, Caucasian, violent foil of the piece, her best friend, Sean. He turns out to be more than what she bargains ...more
Karen Germain
Apr 12, 2011 Karen Germain rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: No One!!!! Don't be fooled by the catchy title!
A big thanks to my friend Nicole, for buying and passing this book along to me. Based on the title and cover, I would have definitely bought it and I am so glad that I didn’t pay money for this book. It was awful.

There were so many things wrong with this novel, that I almost don’t know where to begin. The main character, Fiona, is completely flat and void of any personality other than bitch. She is cold, spoiled, entitled, self-serving… there is zero to like about Fiona. She also thinks that she
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Helene
Oct 16, 2010 Helene rated it did not like it  ·  review of another edition
Disappointed and annoyed after reading this book.

I'll give Ms. Choi credit for being able to "put the monster at the end of the book". But really, this was a disturbingly sad novel. I'm tired of Asian-American writers constantly making fun of our own culture or trying to prove how American we are.

Fiona, the protagonist, was probably fashioned after Ms. Choi herself. I found Fiona annoying with her persistent resistance of her parents' marriage setups. Got old really fast.

And although her boy fri
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Megs ♥
This was a free Nook book I found one day and decided to read only because of the cute cover. hah

Once I started reading, however, I realized that this story was anything but cute. It sucked me in from the first page, and I devoured this book in a few hours. I've since read another book of Choi's and I love her writing style.

She combines humor with darkness beautifully. She always has a character that is doing something horribly wrong, and right until the very end you think they are going to get
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Mike
Feb 08, 2011 Mike rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: Anyone
After reading only 20 pages of this book, I knew that I would be giving it a high ranking. I almost thought I could write the review before finishing the book. Not quite.

This book is dark, very dark. If you like biting sarcasm, mischievous (some would use "evil") thinking, and quick plot lines, this book will appeal to you. And while the opening chapters were rife with all of the above, they led into a middle and finish that added depth and darkness.

Ms. Choi adds a significant helping of family
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Fleece
FINALLY (i put this at the beginning because it's great): i don't know what the fuck the character was thinking, hello kitty being passive. HELLO KITTY RIPS TREE TRUNKS OUT OF THE FUCKING GROUND.



okay, I LOATHED AND ENJOYED THIS BOOK AT THE SAME TIME, for many reasons, most of the loving reasons being OMG CANTONESE PROTAGONIST, and most of the hating reasons being INTERNALIZED RACIST AND MISOGYNISTIC PROTAGONIST and a complete buy-in to VICTIM BLAMING and SHALLOW SLUTS and NONSEXUAL CHINESE BOYS
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Philia
Jul 10, 2013 Philia rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The shocking pink colour book jacket caught my attention. Based on it's title, I would never have picked it. But after it's numerous Silent Invitation on the library shelf, I thought I could at least flip through a few pages and give it a chance. At least, someone else from HongKong has taken her first step to write and published her debut novel.

Giving it a chance i did. I read the first 5 chapters straight, giggling out loud a number of times and breaking the silence in the library before flash
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Samantha Kukuljan
This book was Interesting. I didn't say fantastic, I said interesting. Interesting enough to make me keep reading it.

I guess the Author's voice is one thing that sucks you in. I cannot help but think the author has plugged herself into her own novel but even though the character is smart, ruthless and overall a bitch. I liked her and I don't like a lot of female leads.

Then there's her friend Sean. When I first started reading this book I thought it would be a Asian girl gets pressured to fall fo
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Marianne
I had to let this one marinate a little bit before I wrote out something. If Christopher Moore was an American-Chinese woman then he could have very well penned this novel. I mean that in the best way possible. I could relate to being a grown woman under traditional Asian regime. I don't know if everyone would understand how much easier it is in her type of family to be blindly obedient and then just sneak around to do the other stuff. For that alone, I appreciate the symbolism in the title.

Dar
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Lisette Brodey
I had no idea what this book was about when I set out to read it.

Chinese American attorney Fiona Yu, loses her virginity to a silicone dildo coated in two-percent Lidocaine gel and decides she must get her hymen restored. The plastic surgeon, specializing in hymen restoration, who greets her in the office, turns out to be a childhood friend, Sean. And Sean did some pretty crazy stuff back in school.

Fiona, “half in love with Sean,” is trying to get the message to her father that she has no inter
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Medeia Sharif
Jul 09, 2012 Medeia Sharif rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: read-in-2012
Fiona Yu detests Hello Kitty, who’s bland, pale, and expressionless. She believes too many Asian women are pushed into Hello Kitty’s cookie cutter format of passive conformity. Living with her parents as a twenty-something attorney, she wants her freedom yet traditional customs are forced down her throat. Her parents are arranging a marriage between her and Don Koo, someone she finds unappealing.

In the quest to restore her hymen, Fiona meets up with Dr. Sean Killroy, a childhood friend. As a chi
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Sarah
Aug 24, 2011 Sarah rated it liked it
Shelves: fiction
This is my third book for the #boutofbooks book-a-thon.

I have no idea what to say about this book. I don't even know how to classify it. It's not a mystery novel, but it's about a serial killer or killers, I'm not sure.

When I first read the summary for this book I thought that it would be a great companion for books like "Joy Luck Club". It's about a 29 year old Chinese American woman who is tired of being what she calls a "Hello Kitty" - a quiet and subservient Asian woman. She's a lawyer who w
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Mika Gallardo
Hello Kitty Must Die is about Fiona Yu, a modern Chinese-American woman living in San Francisco. At the age of twenty-eight, her parents pressure her to get married, settle down an be a good traditional Chinese housewife. Her father sets her up with different Chinese men and none of them work out. Mostly because Fiona has no desire to get married, have children and live in a suburban home, partly because all those men are complete losers. She struggles against her parents' intentions, protesting ...more
Brittnee
This book has been on my 'to-read' list for a very long time. Like, added the day I joined this site type of long time. I'm not going to lie to you and act like my desire to read it didn't have anything to do with Hello Kitty being in the title, because let's face it, that is exactly why I wanted to read it. I am also going to honestly say that I hated the beginning of this book. I hated it so much that I nearly abandoned it. Luckily my commitment to finishing what I start gave me the will to co ...more
Michelle
Aug 15, 2011 Michelle rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I subscribe to a blog on my Kindle called "Free Kindle Books." Everyday, the blogger updates with lists of books and their descriptions that are available for free on amazon.com and other sites. I have downloaded several that seem appealling to me, but this is the first I read all the way through.

At first glance, this book is about an American Chinese woman in her twenties whose parents want to marry her off. At second glance, this book is a tale of serial killers. It describes what they think,
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Teipu
Sep 11, 2016 Teipu rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: paperback, read-2016
Seems like the authors favorite book is American Psycho, because this read like a watered-down version of it.
The main character could have solved a lot of her problems if she just would move out of her parents house...
Aviva
Aug 04, 2010 Aviva rated it it was ok  ·  review of another edition
Disappointing despite the fabulously irresistible title.

It started out very witty but devolved into a bad imitation of Showtime's Dexter television series.

Yes, everyone must die, but did that mantra need to be repeated quite so frequently?

The only redeeming feature is that it's a quick read. And I suppose it should get some credit since it wasn't horribly written enough for me to quit midway through ... but to be honest, I'm not at all sure why I didn't quit by the time I hit the middle. I rea
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Kavita Ramesh
Aug 12, 2015 Kavita Ramesh rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Darkly funny, subversive, and with a strong plot. I was surprised by how much I liked it.
Erin
Sep 28, 2015 Erin rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
I read this book for a book club in my area. All I can say is these women must be twisted. While the book was incredibly well-written, I was dragged from one page to the next almost in complete shock at the story line. While I have read some weird stuff in my time, this one took the cake.

Fiona Yu is not interested in men. Period. She’s not interested in women for that matter. She just doesn’t have the passion in her for anyone. She wants to live her life as she sees fit and that’s that. She does
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Janet
Aug 18, 2010 Janet rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
fierce, hilarious, perhaps gleefully vicious, totally amped up. none of the characters though are quite human so that the human elements of like... sympathy and stuff... are what seemed weird and forced. also contained my utter pet peeve in writing of rattling off brand names in outfits. anyyyhooo, this sure was more interesting and fun to read than the run of the mill, east meets west meets a generic asian american story crap floating around out there. would love to see what she comes up with n ...more
Chris
May 18, 2015 Chris rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Choi's "Hello Kitty Must Die" is a dark comedy that is shallowly sarcastic but deeply set in justifiable snark. It starts out amusingly quaint and then becomes progressively darker as it quickly shifts into crime-fiction territory, something not altogether unpleasant. The protagonist is a slightly narcissistic asian-american woman (who don't need no man) with a penchant for serial killers and a disinclination for the typical-- specifically the docile, baby-popping, skin-creaming, man-subservient ...more
Anna
Apr 26, 2010 Anna rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: fave-adult-2010
I won't lie: I wanted to LOVE this one -- & in some ways I did. I mean c'mon, the title alone renders it worthy of "best of the year status." Uniquely irreverent & delightfully vulgar, right down the author's blurb. The particular brand of humor, however, a little too "Heathers" (old school Wynona Rider flick, remember?) for my taste.

Note: If repeated readings of the word hymen offends your lady-like sensibilities, you best steer clear.
Vivienne
Like many I was drawn by the title and rather expected it to be chicklit about the struggles of a young Asian-American woman to break away from the expectations of her culture. Hence Hello Kitty must die!

In one way it was though Fiona's journey turned out to be much darker and the novel more bbiting in its humour than I could have imagined at the start.

I loved its strangeness.



Jen Spencer
Aug 01, 2012 Jen Spencer rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book was definitely not what I expected when I read the first page. My boyfriend picked it out for me, which I thought was pretty cool... then realized that they talked about nether regions on the first page. Even cooler. It grabbed my attention from page one and it held it all the way through. I thought it was a really good book. Kudos Jake; great choice.
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“You can always count on an asshole to be an asshole.” 10 likes
“But I didn't want to be anyone's green card ticket, meal ticket, cook, washing lady, housemaid, personal masseuse, baby machine, regularly-scheduled-hole in the mattress. Only to end up dead, discarded, buried in a ditch somewhere, dumped into the big, blue sea, all used up.
Boys should just stay home and fuck their mothers.”
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