The Vampire Relationship Guide: Meeting & Mating (Vampire Relationship Guide #1) by Evelyn Lafont

Mar 31, 2011 Redd rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

For one who doesn't like vampires very much, I found myself drawn in and captivated by Josie's inner antics as she sought a relationship with Gregory, a captivating vampire she met at his house party one evening. Toss in another fella called Walker and suddenly Josie finds herself in the dilemma of what to do with two highly attractive vamps who want to her for themselves.

The Vampire Relationship Guide had me in stitches I was laughing so hard. Josie kills me with her wit and antics with these t...more

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Nov 24, 2011 Zoe rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: Fans of Sookie Stackhouse and other UF vampire stories.

Shelves: ebook, urban-fantasy

The Vampire Relationship Guide Volume 1 is subtitled Meeting and Mating, but probably should have been labeled UR Doing it Wrong. While the writing is engaging and the world building fascinating, the narrator’s stunning lack of perception drags down the second half of the novella. The ending is further hampered by a bad guy plot so hideous, it’s no wonder it failed. I’ve seen better criminal plots hatched by first graders for a cookie raid.(And the first graders didn’t get caught.)

But let’s star...more The Vampire Relationship Guide Volume 1 is subtitled Meeting and Mating, but probably should have been labeled UR Doing it Wrong. While the writing is engaging and the world building fascinating, the narrator’s stunning lack of perception drags down the second half of the novella. The ending is further hampered by a bad guy plot so hideous, it’s no wonder it failed. I’ve seen better criminal plots hatched by first graders for a cookie raid.(And the first graders didn’t get caught.)

But let’s start with what works, and why it works. We’re introduced to Josie, a bridal shop worker who has an obsession with meeting and bedding a vampire. She’s offered the chance to attend a party of a well to do vampire named Gregory, and so dressing up fancy, she heads out to hook up. Josie and Gregory meet and hit it off well, and as Josie leaves, she meets another vampire. That meeting doesn’t go so well. Yet these introductions worked well for me, and I initially loved Josie’s random strange questions or comments. I also liked the little glimpses into the background of this world’s vampires. They have a good mix of familiar tropes as well as some new ideas to help keep the monsters fresh and interesting to learn about.

The second vampire Josie met at the party introduces himself the next day as Walker, and then proceeds to act like a jerk over, and over, and over. And yet, “there’s something about him” that Josie can’t help but like. Oy. I had a similar problem with the characters in Amanda Hocking’s Switched, and for the exact same reason. Nothing in the dialogue or the character’s actions hints at physical or emotional attraction, and yet the narrator tells me over and over how very hot the vampire is, and therefore, that overcomes their absolutely boorish behavior. Apparently female heroines are so lonely that the first guy to look at them is worth jumping, even if the look they’re getting is a scowl of contempt. This kind of “attraction” makes Josie look so desperate for approval that even when both guys are treating her like crap, she sticks around. Hey, at least it’s attention, right? Bleh, this is not a good quality when combined with her other bad traits.

The story moves to a big conflict for the final chapters, and when the bad guy steps out to reveal his plans, I wanted to weep with baby Jesus. The plan is poorly thought out, and the reasons that the bad guy chose Josie make no sense.

So, this leaves me in a bit of a pickle. Here we have a story with solid writing, many charming moments of wit, and with vampires who are a combination of familiar and new aspects that make the world building intensely interesting. But Josie’s method of world building is asking hick questions that aren’t even appropriate as fifth date material, much less the first. If Josie and I were on a date, I would expect her to say “So...you used to have a dick, huh? What's that all about?” That’s exactly how tacky she is in broaching vampire topics. And while the world Josie lives in is fascinating, once we get to that first set of dates, Josie reveals why she’s still single as she nears her thirties. She’s a goober who likes the taste of her own shoes. She has to, because she keeps opening her mouth wide to shove both shoes inside.

The vampires have an interesting background, and this is a world where vampires are out in society, something you don’t see often. It’s a unique enough view that if you can overlook Josie being a hick, the book isn’t bad. But even being a hick myself, I was frequently face-palming at how tacky she was. Think of this as a brief road trip with someone you sometimes wish you could sex up, only to wish you could drown her voice out with the radio a few minutes later.

I’m going to give The Vampire Relationship Guide Volume 1: Meeting and Mating 3 stars and recommend it to fans of vampire humor and urban fantasy series like the Sookie Stackhouse mysteries. And being charitable, Josie didn’t rub me the wrong way nearly as badly as Sookie, or as Wendy from Switched. I was able to make it through Josie’s book, while I dropped Switched and Dead Until Dark early on. So call that a tepid endorsement of Josie as being the least cloying of the three.
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Apr 11, 2011 Melissa Wehunt rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: vampires, paranormal, humor, humorous, paranormal-romance, sex, erotic, erotica, kindle, read-in-2011

This was a pretty good paranormal romance/ertotica read. I don't believe it was a full lenght novel, but rather a novella. It came highly recommended from someone else, so I was totally all about reading it asap. I didn't think it was like, totally great...but it was fun and fast. :) I would definitly like to read further installments of these characters...assuming there will be some. The author could have definitely made a full length novel out of it.

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Jun 11, 2012 Michelle (In Libris Veritas) rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: fantasy, kindle, vampires, short-stories

I honestly didn't expect to like this and I think it's because I downloaded it when it was free. Sadly most books that vampire related and free at some point usually end up on the low end of the scale. I'm happy to say this went the other way.
The main character, Josie, is a little goofy and at times I wanted her to stop saying such stupid things but most of the time she didn't bother me. Walker kind of annoyed me with his mood shifts but I suppose given his reasoning it makes sense.
I like how...more

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Aug 22, 2011 Jackie rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: Vampire fans who enjoy humor and witty repartee

Shelves: e-book-edition-for-review, read-in-2011

Goodreads Book Synopsis

Josie wants what she's never been able to have--sex with a vampire. When she receives an invitation to a party thrown by one of the world's richest vamps, she doesn't stop to question her luck; she just jumps into her favorite stilettos and heads out to the event of a lifetime, secretly hoping that she'll come home with a party favor in the shape of a sexy coffin dweller.

But the great undead, much to Josie's chagrin, aren't just pale sexbots with pointy teeth waiting to s...more

Goodreads Book Synopsis

Josie wants what she's never been able to have--sex with a vampire. When she receives an invitation to a party thrown by one of the world's richest vamps, she doesn't stop to question her luck; she just jumps into her favorite stilettos and heads out to the event of a lifetime, secretly hoping that she'll come home with a party favor in the shape of a sexy coffin dweller.

But the great undead, much to Josie's chagrin, aren't just pale sexbots with pointy teeth waiting to satisfy her carnal desires--they are dangerous--and sometimes cranky. With a single-minded focus on fulfilling her sole sexual longing, Josie unwittingly entrenches herself in the twisted and sometimes antagonistic world of vampire relationships with no one to guide her, but herself.

My Thoughts

I love almost any kind of vampire story, cannot help it since seeing Bela Lugosi playing Dracula as a child. Growing up my favorite thing was to hide behind my Dad's chair when we watched those old Black and White movies, why they scared me is something that makes no sense to me now. However the idea of a creature of the night who seduced women and drank their blood while making it a pleasurable experience is one that still fascinates me. More so when I watch my favorite Salvatore brother, bad boy Damon, on The Vampire Diaries television series. I enjoy the stories written about vampires that incorporate humor as well as some steamy romance so Josie's adventures in the world of dating a vampire was something that absolutely entertained me and also proved once again you should never judge a man by his outer appearance or demeanor. Sometimes when it seems too good to be true it really is! What we all seem to forget is that vampires are not living creatures, they are not bound by human morals or human laws. Furthermore when you have the power of centuries of living at your fingertips such things as right or wrong no longer apply, especially if the vampire in question was never a nice person when they were human!
The twist that author Evelyn Lafont incoporates in The Vampire Relationship Guide, Volume 1: Meeting and Mating is one that I did see coming, however for me it added nicely to the buildup of the ending and when all is said and done this little novella is about as perfect a tale as I have had the pleasure of reading in a book 300-400 pages long. Amazing what the right usage of words can create in less than 150 pages!

Fans of Paranormal Romance who like a little bit of suspense and mystery in their plot will love this as much as I did. There is so much going on in such a short space that it is a shame to spoil the story for you, suffice to say it is a quick/easy/funny read which should appeal across many age groups.

Now only have to wait till the 31st of August for my copy of book 2 The Vampire Relationship Guide, Volume 2: Secrets and Trust , which I ordered from the author directly off her website and am looking forward to reading.

[I have to disclose that I read a copy of the novella which was given to me by the author. This in no way affected my thoughts or colored my judgement on the book and there was no other compensation for my review comments from the author.]

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Aug 02, 2011 Jess Haines rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: paranormal-romance

This book follows our heroine, Josie, as she lives the dream and dates not one but two eligible vampire bachelors. It’s pretty flattering attention considering she spends her days working at a bridal shop dealing with bitching bridezillas.

To be honest, I wasn’t sure what to expect when I read this. Certainly not the down-to-earth problems and at times hilarious situations Josie finds herself in. She’s direct, insightful, occasionally a bit self-depreciating, and makes no bones about her desire t...more

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May 29, 2011 Belinda Boring rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

I had so much fun reading this book and there were countless times where I turned to my husband and said "Man, I think the author's writing about me!" I am a vampire girl ALL THE WAY. I love the broody, tortured soul and the intensity. The vampires in my head are UBER sexy and I think if I ever met one I'd melt into a heated puddle because it would mean ... there may be one of those erotic bites *blush* So when I began reading Vampire Relationship Guide, straight away I identified with Josie. Sh...more I had so much fun reading this book and there were countless times where I turned to my husband and said "Man, I think the author's writing about me!" I am a vampire girl ALL THE WAY. I love the broody, tortured soul and the intensity. The vampires in my head are UBER sexy and I think if I ever met one I'd melt into a heated puddle because it would mean ... there may be one of those erotic bites *blush* So when I began reading Vampire Relationship Guide, straight away I identified with Josie. She is a girl after my own heart, BFF material because she has some serious lusting after the fanged hotties as well.This book was a hilarious look at Josie's getting her hearts desire of dating a vampire BUT the author is especially sweet - she gives Josie TWO love interests. Can you imagine what it would feel like having that kind of attention? *swoon* This book was easy to fall in love with and I devoured it in one sitting. Once you start, you won't want to stop!

I really loved Josie. I loved the excitement that she had and I could totally see myself hanging out with her, gushing over men. She was so giddy to get an invite to a vamp party and I loved how confident she was in going to it by herself. She shows up and its glamorous. As much as I'd be in heaven, I would've been hiding behind a potted fern, lusting from afar but she talks to the hottest guy there - Gregory! Talk about swoony. I would've been quite content with him alone but after leaving the party, Josie crosses paths with another vamp and it was ALL over for me. Walker is the epitome of everything that is sexy about vampires. He's the reason why I get full body tingles and secretly wish my hubby would sprout fangs. He had me panting in parts and searching for ways to swap places with Josie. He is a bad boy, full of mystery and snark and he made me want to reach in to the book and do very dirty things LOL Josie really had her hands full - two very different guys and her feelings swaying this way and that. Gregory is attentive and Walker oozes yummy goodness so what's a girl to do. I really had a good time reading how Josie dealt with everything and how she responded to each guy.

This is the debut novella by Evelyn and guys, you need to watch out for her because she writes with an amazing sense of humor. I found myself laughing all through the story and it made it an amazing experience. There wasn't any point in the book where I lost interested, it kept me hooked to the end and left me desperate for more. Vampire Relationship Guide, Vol 1 is a read you'll relate to, that entertains and has you feeling good. Definitely grab yourself a copy and I'll be looking for your "I HEART Walker" tweets and Facebook comments LOL Happy reading!!
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Apr 27, 2011 Donna (BLHmistress) rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This book was an absolute joy to read, I know I have mentioned in previous reviews how much humor is an important factor for me in books and this one had it from practically the first page and continued through out the story.

I was literally laughing out loud for the majority of the book, Josie, I can easily say she will rank as my top favorite female character of 2011. She was experiencing what all of us that dream of having two vampires competing for her affection or to at least get her in bed...more

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Dec 12, 2012 Kara rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: awesome-title, vampires, paranormal-romance, humor, chic-lit

We are presented with a world where vampires and humans have assimilated as much as any group has become part of American culture.

No hiding under beds or in closets, no stalking through the dark forests, no secret meetings in basements and no angsting over outside prejudice – vampires are just part of the new normal, like his and his cake toppers.

So, now blood is an option on any restaurant menu, as ordinary as the gluten-free section, the ADA has been stretched to cover the vampiric need for b...more
We are presented with a world where vampires and humans have assimilated as much as any group has become part of American culture.

No hiding under beds or in closets, no stalking through the dark forests, no secret meetings in basements and no angsting over outside prejudice – vampires are just part of the new normal, like his and his cake toppers.

So, now blood is an option on any restaurant menu, as ordinary as the gluten-free section, the ADA has been stretched to cover the vampiric need for banks to have nighttime hours (woot!), and magazines commonly run articles along the lines of how-to-date-a-vampire. One magazine has a “Dear Vampy” advice column, about human-vampire relations.

So, are vampires stand ins for a particular social, cultural, physical, ethnic, or sexual group here? I don’t know, and don’t really care, because I was too busy laughing at the both ease and hilarity of making vampires just another carrot in the American stew.

For the main character, she finds vampires to be her ‘type’, and is eager to find a way to meet one who’s single – working in a bridal store, she meets few guys who aren’t already engaged. Luckily, her vampiric mailman (I know, right?) offers her an invite to a party being thrown by one of the most handsome, rich, single vampires of them all.

Wacky erotic hijinks ensue with the girl enjoying, sort of, two sexy vampires expressing intense interest. The toothsome twosome cross multiple lines, to the point where even the main character (of a erotic/romance novel – the kind of story where any male behavior goes) realizes she might have to file two restraining orders.

She’s also incredibly insensitive, which annoyed me, until she actually articulates that she might be insensitive. She’s the equivalent of the “nice” girl who walks up to a lesbian couple she doesn’t know at a bar and asks, all innocence, “how” they have sex. >rolls eyes< Oh vey.

Basically, I found the setting more interesting than the characters.
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Jun 20, 2011 Caitlin rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: read-in-2011, review-book

I read half of this little novella last night in the bath. I thought I was going to have to sue Evelyn for the cost of a new kindle, the amount of times I nearly dropped it in the water from laughing so hard. The story follows Josie, who has decided to persue a relationship with out favourite blooksucking fiends who in this universe are out and proud. Josie is hilarious. She's the perfect mix of sarcasm, adorable naivete and humorous commentary. Her comebacks were longwinded, often obscure and o...more I read half of this little novella last night in the bath. I thought I was going to have to sue Evelyn for the cost of a new kindle, the amount of times I nearly dropped it in the water from laughing so hard. The story follows Josie, who has decided to persue a relationship with out favourite blooksucking fiends who in this universe are out and proud. Josie is hilarious. She's the perfect mix of sarcasm, adorable naivete and humorous commentary. Her comebacks were longwinded, often obscure and occasionally slightly stupid. She's fantastic. Move over Sookie Stackhouse, cause Josie's here to stay and she's funnier, less whiny and a damn site better looking. She does appear to be having an equally eventful stay in the vampire romance camp however.

For a novella there was an impressive amount of world building in this novel. We learnt a lot about LaFont's take on vampire lore,which is imaginative and realistic and obviously well conceived. I loved that we also found out this information through Josie's occasionally tactless and offensive questioning-which removed the need for out and out exposition allowing the story to flow well. I loved how LaFont stayed true to the Anne Rice claim that vampires are all beautiful because why would you turn an ugly person? That made me giggle, me and my boyfriend had a debate about that explanation vs the beauty being a part of vampirism only a few nights ago-I knew he'd appreciate that addition.

There was much more of a storyline than you expect from the synopsis, which was a very pleasant surprise. I loved the development of the plot, Josie ends up with not one but two fit vampires clamouring for her attention. Naturally, one is a complete dick. And not in that sorta charming Jace-like way, he's actually a dick. It's hilarious. I loved Walker's character a lot and I loved how exasperated Josie became with him. She didn't just go alot with his insults because he was hot, and in fact she gave as good as she got. Gregory seemed like your typical vampire really: hot, confident, ridiculously rich.

The writing was hilarious. Straightforward, punchy and laced with satire. This is not a book you can read in public, unless you don't mind the awkward stares that come with laughing on the bus. Overall, this was a perfect lighthearted read for a Sunday night when I was feeling a bit miserable. It exceeded my (not so low) expectations and provided several hours of high quality entertainment.One of the best things about this book is the wide range of people it can appeal too. It almost bridges the gap between chick lit and paranormal romance. Now I'm not a fan of the former, but I loved this, and I've seen people who aren't a fan of the latter who adore it just as much. However this is definitely a book for a more mature audience. I'd've happily read it at 15, I was reading Sookie at that age, but I'm not sure I'd want *my* 15 year old to read it, if I had one.

The only small criticism is the cover. I thought it looked a bit drab at first, and then I read a post where Evelyn highlighted her reasoning behind it-that it was designed to look like an old manual-which I could then see and appreciate. However I still don't think it's eyecatching enough to appeal to a large audience.
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Apr 24, 2011 Crystal ♥ RBtWBC rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: request-blog-tour

3.5 stars

The Vampire Relationship Guide was a funny novella and a fun, quick read.

Josie is an outspoken 32 year old who works in a bridal shop and has an obsession with dating a vampire; until she suddenly has two hot vamps vying for her attention. Then she finds out that they may not be all the rage she thought they were.

Josie meets Gregory at a party and they instantly hit it off and he seems like the perfect man, err..vampire. But when she plans a date with him, Walker, the rude vampire that...more

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Nov 20, 2011 Jenn rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: keep-in-library

The beginning of this book was a solid 4/5, then dropped to 2/5, but redeemed itself at a 3/5. I don't want to spoil it, but you will see what I mean when you read it. When the conflict exposes itself, I was left thinking "Um, oooooookay. If you say so." Of course, this is a book about vampires and the human women who want to jump their bones, so there's an expectation of silliness.

Josie is a smart-mouthed (*cough* bitch *cough*) bridal shop employee with a taste for vampires. She snags an invit...more

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Aug 06, 2011 Julie Parsons rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: purchased-lost-giveaways

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.

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Apr 21, 2011 Beverly rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Loved the story! Evelyn creates fabulous characters. I fell in love with Walker from the go. Gregory creeped me out from the start and I was so sure right away that he was really the bad guy. Josie is a great character, loads of spunk. I would have liked it if the story had been fleshed out and longer. So, I am hoping for a sequel (which I assume is coming considering that this is volume one).

This was a fast, fun read. The characters are great! Josie is spunky and funny, Gregory is smooth and my...more

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Sep 15, 2011 Kara rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: florida, paranormal, romance, vampires

Goodreads Summary:

Josie is your average girl who just wants one simple thing to make her feel complete--sex with a vampire. When she receives an invitation to a party thrown by one of the world's richest vamps, she doesn't stop to question her luck; she jumps into her favorite stilettos and heads out to the event of a lifetime, secretly hoping that she'll come home with a sexy party favor.

But the great undead aren't just pointy toothed hotties waiting to satisfy Josie's carnal desires--they are...more

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Apr 21, 2011 Tishia (Paranormal Opinion) rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This is a very funny, novella-length book. At only 90 pages, it is something that's great to read when you don't have a lot of free time. Josie is hilarious, I just love the way she thinks and they way she talks. She is a 32 year old bridal shop worker who is just dying to jump in the sack with a vampire. She suddenly lands herself dates with 2 different, sexy vampires. Unfortunately, when you date someone for what they are instead of who they are - you are probably going to end up very disappoi...more

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Apr 06, 2011 Naomi rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

The Vampire Relationship Guide Volume 1 is the first book in a series by Evelyn Lafont. This short novel is full of mystery and humour.

Josie works in a bridal shop, the worst place to meet the man of her dreams. The only thing is the man of her dreams isn’t technically a man - he’s a vampire. All of Josie’s dreams come true when she is invited to a vampire party. This could be her chance to meet Mr Right..fangs and all.

Well not only does Josie land up dating one vampire, but she ends up dating a...more

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May 28, 2011 Amber R at Awesomesaucebookclub rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This book is awesome! I can't wait and I hope and pray that Evelyn Lafont writes some more books.

I love Josie. She is so funny and unapologetic. I love that she is independent and happy with her life. Josie doesn't succumb to the pressure of the "normal" life that her friend is always kind of trying to push on her. She stands up for herself and know what she wants from life. She's happy with what she has.

There are, of course, some hot scenes in this book. I wouldn't love it as much if there we...more

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Mar 28, 2011 Diana (Offbeat Vagabond) rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: humor, vampires, paranormal, paranormal-romance, arc

Review posted here: Offbeat Vagabond

Thanks to Evelyn Lafont herself, she gave me the chance to read her very first book. Now I must admit (and I told her myself) that I do like paranormal romance, but chick lit has never been my thing. But she said if I was a fan of the Sookie Stackhouse series, then this should be up my alley. I must say, she was definitely right.

Meeting and Mating is pretty straightforward. In a world where vampires and humans coexist on an actual normal basis, Josie, a thir...more Review posted here: Offbeat Vagabond

Thanks to Evelyn Lafont herself, she gave me the chance to read her very first book. Now I must admit (and I told her myself) that I do like paranormal romance, but chick lit has never been my thing. But she said if I was a fan of the Sookie Stackhouse series, then this should be up my alley. I must say, she was definitely right.

Meeting and Mating is pretty straightforward. In a world where vampires and humans coexist on an actual normal basis, Josie, a thirty-two year old woman who works at a bridal shop, wants to finally do it...with a vampire. While at work one night, she gets an invitation from a mailman (who is a vampire) who says he can't make it to the party. Josie takes advantage and goes to this party and meets a sexy and rich vampire (with a spray tan) named Gregory. They hit it off and plan to meet up again. While leaving this party, she meets another vampire named who calls himself Walker. He is a smartass, a smoker, and is sort of stalking Josie. But oddly enough she ends up on a date with them both. It was more obvious the differences between the vampires and that just made it more fun to read.

I am not going to say more because I will end up giving things away. It is short, but it is quite packed. But don't go in to this book expecting some novel about a chick gawking about love because I can tell you now, it will change on you. I wish I can say it, but trust me, by the time I got to the last two chapters, my mouth was hanging open. I really enjoyed this book. It may not have been my genre of choice, but I am glad I broke out of my comfort zone. This book is full of humor, intriguing characters, and mystery. I just wish the book was longer, but I can tell you now, it is great either way. I am having an interview with Evelyn Lafont on Thursday and I hope to see you all there congratulating her on her first release. She deserves it. Thank you Evelyn so much and I can't wait to read more from this series.(less)

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Apr 26, 2011 Mandy rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This was a fun book! It was a quick, easy read, and thoroughly enjoyable. I love, love, loved the MC - Josie. Her narration was funny and witty and I really wanted to hang out with her because she seems like someone who would just be hilarious. I enjoyed the witty banter she had with other characters and her sarcasm was awesome.

The plot moved along, there was dating, action, sexual tension, steamy sex scene, mystery, suspense, and a nice resolution. My only complaint is it was too short. I want...more

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Mar 28, 2011 Lexie rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: book-type-e-book, genre-romance-paranormal, review-blog

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. This is really more like a 3.5 for me. This is a short story, clocking in at just under 90 pages, and in some ways that was part of the problem. The story began as if it would be a standard length harlequin romance title, but with only a fraction of the time the author rushed the pace along at awkward moments (like with the development of Walker or the eventual reality of Gregory).

Josie was an engaging character--a little foul mouthed, but she had some funny observances. Plus she had a grounded...more This is really more like a 3.5 for me. This is a short story, clocking in at just under 90 pages, and in some ways that was part of the problem. The story began as if it would be a standard length harlequin romance title, but with only a fraction of the time the author rushed the pace along at awkward moments (like with the development of Walker or the eventual reality of Gregory).

Josie was an engaging character--a little foul mouthed, but she had some funny observances. Plus she had a grounded sense of things; she knew what she didn't want (the 2.5 kids and house in the suburbs) and what did want (to have fun). I think LaFont overdid the fact that Josie didn't want to look 'slutty', in the course of her dressing for the vampire party Josie mentions it no less then four times and later she mentions it several more times.

LaFont took a broad stroke with explaining the world--there was a lot of 'let's explain this' moments because Josie understands very little of how vampires tick (despite being obsessed with them--she only seems to know they're gorgeous, marry a lot and are great in bed) and would ask questions like 'Do you even breathe?'

I was kind of uncomfortable with the nature of Walker and Josie's relationship initially. Things started off badly, but Walker's attempt to make up for it was awkward at best and Josie's judgy-ness was frustrating. She takes Gregory to a bowling alley for a first date--a bowling alley with a rich, cultured vampire--and yet Walker's attempt at a first date (at a biker bar) is more offensive? Walker compliments her and worries about her, while Gregory seems to be amused by her (almost like a pet), and Walker is in the wrong?

Admittedly Walker pushes all her buttons, but he puts up with a lot more abuse from her. Which made the ending all the more confusing. The eventual revelation of who Gregory is wasn't a complete surprise, but Walker's explanation was. And it doesn't explain why Josie, fresh from having a night of passion with Gregory is like 'Whatever you want Walker' and strips for him and let's him help with a bath. I sincerely think I missed a chunk of development.

The little 'excerpts' and 'Dear Vampy' segments were funny (though again Josie's was kind of abrupt) and I did like Walker's character, possibly the best. I think if LaFont had more time to flesh out the motivations of everyone involved, this would have read easier. Josie's just wanting to have sex with a vampire, Gregory's ambitions for the election and Walker's mysteriousness enticed the reader to read on, but there was ultimately little to no pay off for it. (less)

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Apr 21, 2011 Carmel (Rabid Reads) rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Reviewed by Rabid Reads

The Vampire Relationship Guide, Vol 1 is a cute, quick read that will have you giggling in no time. The title of this book will give you a pretty good idea as to its contents. Josie goes through Evelyn Lafont's how-to steps in such a way that you can't help but smile. I was surprised by the ending when an element of danger is added. When I first picked-up this book I was expecting a light, chick-lit read which is exactly what I received but the twist at the end was a welco...more

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Apr 05, 2011 Stephanie rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

There are two things you need to know about The Vampire Relationship Guide Vol 1. First, it is a novella, so it is the perfect afternoon read. Second, The snarky wit and humor Evelyn Lafont uses will leave you gasping for more. I didn’t know what to expect when I started this book, but I can assure you it is 90 pages of pure fun!

Josie is a girl desperate to date a vampire. She knows very little about them except that they are red hot sexy. This can lead to unexpected consequences, since we all k...more

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Jun 12, 2012 Suzan rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Paranormal Romance fans

I loved this! I had a feeling about halfway through that Walker was more then he seemed and a good guy, I also got the sense that Gregory may not be what he seemed though I didn't expect him to be as much of a bad guy as he was! Until the fangs made an appearance I actually thought that maybe he'd turn out not to be the real Gregory but a stand-in and that Walker would be the real Gregory cause he doesn't give his real name! That changed when Gregory revealed his fangs! Still, I kinda had more o...more

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Apr 15, 2011 Katja rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: favorites, indie, as-ebook, adult, gisrg

Story:

It’s clear, that this is meant to be a light chick-lit with paranormal creatures spicing it up – I’ve read enough Harlequin romances to recognize it – so I’m going to review it as such.

We get to know Josie and start following her dream come true journey into the vampire world. If you think of any pulp romance story, you might believe in the beginning that’s what this is going to be, but it’s a bit more than that. Instead of one handsome male you have two – though it is easy to guess who’s...more Story:

It’s clear, that this is meant to be a light chick-lit with paranormal creatures spicing it up – I’ve read enough Harlequin romances to recognize it – so I’m going to review it as such.

We get to know Josie and start following her dream come true journey into the vampire world. If you think of any pulp romance story, you might believe in the beginning that’s what this is going to be, but it’s a bit more than that. Instead of one handsome male you have two – though it is easy to guess who’s The One – and there’s a dark twist closer to the end. Sure it is foreshadowed, but I didn’t expect it to go that far when reading chick-lit. However it was a refreshing turn and made the book something else than your usual pulp dose.

In my opinion the story suffers a bit from the way it handles the core romance and I would have wanted it to be elaborated. The way it is now just makes me feel uncomfortable of the whole thing. If it wasn’t such a major part of the story it wouldn’t matter that much, but because it’s the romance I count it for quite a chunk.

Main character:

Josie is sweet and witty and comes off somewhat bipolar as a real chick-lit heroine should, but momentarily she seem to be too… gullible. Not sure if gullible is the best word, but I have a hard time finding a better one. In the beginning of the novella Josie had me full-heartedly on her side, but then the bath happened and I just didn’t know what to think anymore. It was too soon from every angle in my opinion, and I kept thinking who would let a stranger do that and not be freaked out in that situation. Of course in chick-lit the heroine rarely portraits the reality, but this was a bit too much for me, since I wasn’t able to relate at all.

Secondary characters:

The author doesn’t dwell too much on others than Josie, but since it’s a novella, it’s not really even expected. I think Lafont revealed us just enough of the characters so you can get a grip of them without interfering with the pace of the story. I did keep hoping that the mailman would have showed himself again later in the book, but he never did.

Writing: Lafont’s way of writing is fast paced and light – even when things get a darker turn – and her novella is an easy and enjoyable read. For a chick-lit the style is pretty perfect. She does overuse certain techniques in the writing, especially in the end where it gets tiresome. Other than that it shows that Lafont took the novella to a professional editor, since there’s no sign of many fundamental mistakes you usually can spot in a self-published eBook.

Overall Rating:

I can easily recommend this as an enjoyable light read to all you who enjoy your chick-lit with a twist. I think the novella would also please those who don’t normally care for paranormal elements in their books.(less)

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Jun 14, 2011 Andrea rated it 5 of 5 stars · review of another edition

The Vampire Relationship Guide is a book that’s been on my TBR-list for a while. I am a big fan of Evelyn LaFont. I think pretty much everything she writes is brilliant, and funny, and smart. So even though I’ve wanted to read this book, I was a little hesitant. What if the book didn’t live up to the expectations I had put on it. Well, crises averted. I am happy to say the The Vampire Relationship Guide: Meeting and Mating was everything I hoped for/expected from LaFont.

First off, I love Josie....more The Vampire Relationship Guide is a book that’s been on my TBR-list for a while. I am a big fan of Evelyn LaFont. I think pretty much everything she writes is brilliant, and funny, and smart. So even though I’ve wanted to read this book, I was a little hesitant. What if the book didn’t live up to the expectations I had put on it. Well, crises averted. I am happy to say the The Vampire Relationship Guide: Meeting and Mating was everything I hoped for/expected from LaFont.

First off, I love Josie. She’s a real “guy’s girl”. She lives an life uncomplicated by marriage, children or a stressful career. And she is completely content. She’s funny and fearless. Josie is the kind of character that we can vicariously live through. She usually has good intentions; but almost always says or does something to end up in ridiculously funny situations. Josie is an endearing character. While reading the book, I felt as if I were chatting with my favorite friend.

Another aspect of the book that I liked is the men. Josie becomes involved with not one ridiculously attractive vampire, but two. The men are everything you can ask for: unbelievably handsome, charming, rich and mysterious. The buildup of the relationships is hot and sometimes so lingering, I thought I would go crazy (in a good way!). Towards the end, I was caught by surprised. Because while this is a funny, sexy little book, it also has heart. The tenderness shown to Josie by one of the vamps, who shall not be named, was so darn beautiful.

The ending of the The Vampire Relationship Guide was set up perfectly for book two, The Vampire Relationship Guide: Volume 2, due out August 31, 2011.

I like to post favorite passages from books. While there were many, many quotable lines, this struck me as one of the funniest:

“The cab smelled like it’d been slept in by ten retired circus clowns who’d gotten jobs scooping horse poo with their hands. I was so upset about what happened between ____ and me that I didn’t even bother to care that I was steeping myself in Eau de Poopie Clown.”

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Apr 27, 2011 Anthony rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: sf-fantasy

I'm going to break this down into The Good and the Not-So-Good to try and keep my thoughts a bit more on track than the first draft of this review turned out.

The Good: This may be one of the funniest genre pastiches I've ever read. Vampire (and other supernatural creature) Romance is a huge market right now, and in 90 pages Evelyn Lafont manages to crack wise about almost every trope of the genre. I haven't even read that much supernatural romance (urban fantasy of the detective/crime realm is m...more I'm going to break this down into The Good and the Not-So-Good to try and keep my thoughts a bit more on track than the first draft of this review turned out.

The Good: This may be one of the funniest genre pastiches I've ever read. Vampire (and other supernatural creature) Romance is a huge market right now, and in 90 pages Evelyn Lafont manages to crack wise about almost every trope of the genre. I haven't even read that much supernatural romance (urban fantasy of the detective/crime realm is more my cup of tea) and I found myself smiling or laughing or nodding knowingly throughout the book. The main reason I enjoyed the book is that it does not take itself too seriously. The book is a fast easy read with lots of funny dialogue and wink-wink-nudge-nudge humor regarding the current obsession with sexy vampires. The author also does a nice job of taking all the standards of vampire lore and giving them the tweaks necessary to make them work in her world without straying too far from what is "canon" about vampires: they drink blood because the magic in their bodies prevents them from making new red blood cells; channels in their teeth draw the blood directly into their circulatory system; drinking blood is an act of sustenance not sexuality; anything that would cause a vamp to lose blood or that would destroy blood cells will eventually kill them (not just a stake to the heart, but any gaping bleeding wound, etc). The main character, Josie, is a bit of a rural rube in her thirties -- almost too innocent despite claims of being jaded -- that is a perfect send-up of the young-nubile-innocent heroine trope. The lead vamps, Gregory and Walker, fit the standard romantic types as well.

The Not-So-Good: Because of the length, there is not a lot of obvious world-building beyond those basics of vampirism, and what other world-building details are mentioned are inconsistent throughout the book. For instance, we are told early on that Vampires are as publicly recognized a minority as any other group you can think of and that laws have been passed declaring that businesses must stay open 24 hours a day to accommodate those who cannot go out in the sun; there's no detail on how long ago Vampires "came out," or how readily they were accepted into mainstream culture. This creates a problem for our main character: vampires are common enough that it's apparently fairly easy to find them, and yet Josie knows so little about vampire culture that she asks incredibly personal questions at the absolute most wrong moments. I realize Josie's questions are a way to get the basic info about vampires mentioned above into the reader's path, but the result is a main character who in social situations is either incredibly stupid (this stuff should be mostly common knowledge and she doesn't have that knowledge despite her vamp-obsession) or incredibly insensitive (she knows what she's asking is a bit personal, but asks anyway, almost like she has no verbal filter between her brain and her mouth). I'm leaning towards the former, because I like the idea of Josie as a play on the young-nubile-innocent heroine and if she's knowledgeable-but-insensitive I don't think I like her as much.

The Part I'm Undecided About: As the book moves from "meeting vampires for sex" to "our heroine is in danger, who will save her" tropes, the plot either becomes burdened with holes large enough to drive a hearse through or becomes a pastiche on the action/adventure genre. i can't speak for the author or her intent, but I have plans to interview her and hopefully will get some insight. I'll post a link when I put the interview up on my website.

Overall, though, I recommend VAMPIRE RELATIONSHIP GUIDE to anyone who enjoys vampire romance fiction and likes a good send-up of genre tropes. I suspect Evelyn Lafont will be continuing the series (otherwise why call this Volume One) and it will be interesting to see how she maintains the tone of this volume.

I've also posted an interview with the author, which can be found at http://anthonycardno.com/?p=111 (less)

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May 04, 2011 Nikki Brandyberry rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition

This was a fluffy read that would have only taken me one sitting if I would have been able to find a quiet place to sit down and read.

Josie really wants to date a vampire. They usually have tons of money and second hand reports claim they are gods in bed. What more could a girl want right? Josie is tired of her predictable everyday “normal” life. So when she gets invited to a vamp party she jumps to say yes. Upon arriving she locks eyes with the suave Gregory and sparks fly. But Gregory isn’t th...more This was a fluffy read that would have only taken me one sitting if I would have been able to find a quiet place to sit down and read.

Josie really wants to date a vampire. They usually have tons of money and second hand reports claim they are gods in bed. What more could a girl want right? Josie is tired of her predictable everyday “normal” life. So when she gets invited to a vamp party she jumps to say yes. Upon arriving she locks eyes with the suave Gregory and sparks fly. But Gregory isn’t the only vamp interested in Josie. Walker, a mysterious, often rude vamp, keeps showing up everywhere Josie seems to be.

Trying to decide between the gorgeous Gregory and the enigma Walker is turning out to be more difficult then Josie expected. Especially since Gregory isn’t always the laid back man he pretends to be. Though Walker isn’t exactly who he claims to be either. Girls that look a lot like Josie are turning up missing and one of them knows more then they are letting on.

This was one of those books that kinda pulls you in and keeps you entertained effortlessly. Fairly short so those of you speed readers won’t have to set a lot of time aside for it. Intrigue, suspense and a bit of heat. I say a bit because the sex scenes were very tame. Much, much tamer then anything I’ve read lately.

The storyline was fast paced but I did have a few issues with the main character Josie. I totally understood her attraction to vampires but what I didn’t understand was her fascination with Gregory. From the get go she finds him attractive sure, but she always seemed to be warring with herself to actually like him. He said and did everything right (for a while) but yet she still couldn’t seem to make herself believe in him. It felt like she really only wanted him for his stature within the community…and his money.

Besides the Gregory issues I wish Josie would have been more content with herself. She’s in her early thirties, she doesn’t have one foot in the grave yet. Yet she seems to have to get married…quickly….and to a vampire…nothing else will do. A girl wants to get married yes, but for me to truly bond with female character I want her to be happy with herself. You don’t need man and all that. Girl power Josie….girl power.

I loved Walker’s mysteriousness. Yeah, he’s an ass about a lot of things and always knows how to stick his foot in his mouth, but honestly Josie got uptight real quick so I don’t necessarily blame Walker for all the upset. His character was tough, strong and cocky….the trifecta in hotness when dealing with fictional charisma.

Once the climax is reveled it was slightly predictable…though still fun. I enjoyed the build up towards the end and will most likely carry my warm fuzzies from the ending of this one to the next installment. Since we till don’t know much about Walker except for the basics. I’m hoping that will be taken care of in the next book.

Instead of reading like a book it read more like a talk with a friend. I enjoyed that. LaFont uses all kinds of slang and her writing is witty and funny. I will be keeping my eye out for the next book in the series.(less)

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Oct 04, 2011 Katy rated it 5 of 5 stars Recommends it for: anyone who likes vampires

Recommended to Katy by: Evelyn Lafont

Shelves: first-reads-book

Josie has been obsessed over wanting to meet, date and have sex with a vampire. Of course, she doesn’t really feel that she’s the sort that would attract a vampire, but a girl can always dream. But then the mailman where she works – Craig – receives a invitation to party thrown by an influential vampire named Gregory and gives her the invitation, since he can’t go. She meets Gregory and he gives her his number and then, while she’s leaving, she meets another vampire, named Walker, who starts sho...more

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Jun 01, 2011 Kelly rated it 3 of 5 stars · review of another edition Recommends it for: Fans of paranormal romance/vampires, fans of chick lit

Shelves: first-in-a-series, chick-lit, paranormal, steamy-reads, secrets-reviewed

I wasn't really sure what to expect when I started this book, but I soon found that it was going to be a light, fun read. Though the title implies this book might be a paranormal romance, I think I would put this more under the "chick lit" category. It's full of dating dilemmas, insecurities and the inner drama that hysterical in a way that only thirty-something, single, chick lit character can pull off.

This story was different from most vampire stories in that humans know about vampires. They e...more

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The Vampire Relationship Guide: Meeting & Mating (Vampire Relationship Guide #1)

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