false http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1171821448m/120183.jpg 120183 7 <blockquote> <I>"Like being chained to a corpse, isn't it?"</I> </blockquote> This is a memoir, not a biography, with obvious resonance. John Bayley, former Professor of English at Oxford, and Iris Murdoch, philosopher and author, have been married for more than 45 years. She has shown the degenerative effects of Alzheimer's Disease for the last four years. The words quoted above were not, needless to say, his. He chronicles a shared experience that can no longer be shared except with those outside of it, and as such is vital for him as he copes, rather than grieves. He purposefully blurs the boundaries of past and present as he describes the marriage of two brilliant intellectuals, determinedly unworldly and collegiate, mixing wine and water (they are serial dippers) throughout Europe as they serenely move "closer and closer apart". <P> When Iris's intellect deteriorates her dependency inevitably increases, and they are "sailing into the dark" (her words) until the end of the book, when Bayley contends that the voyage is over, and they have both arrived somewhere. It is the spiritual answer to her perpetual question: "When are we going?", and provides a quietly uplifting resolution. John Bayley has written a magnificent paean to their love. Without underplaying the realities of living with someone with Alzheimer's, he writes in a moving and dignified way, without sentimentality, of a woman rather than a condition, who is still every bit his wife, if even more his dependent. He believes that their marriage released the child in Iris; now they watch Teletubbies together, wordlessly secure. --<I>David Vincent</I> 115723 book 14 9 1998 Iris: A Memoir of Iris Murdoch total:67|5:18|4:30|3:16|2:2|1:1| 67 263 93 10 5 0 false false Thu Feb 05 00:00:00 -0800 2009 Thu Feb 05 12:15:40 -0800 2009 Thu Feb 05 12:16:27 -0800 2009 more...]]> 3 0 false false Wed Apr 01 00:00:00 -0700 2009 Sun Apr 12 06:50:04 -0700 2009 Tue Apr 21 10:33:18 -0700 2009 1 more...]]> 0 0 false false Thu Oct 02 09:33:58 -0700 2008 Thu Aug 14 12:35:27 -0700 2008 Thu Oct 02 09:33:58 -0700 2008
"She wanted to have her friends, each of them, for themselves; she wanted them to know her in the same pristine way. No groups, no sets. No comparing of notes between two about a t...more...]]> 5 0 false false Tue May 26 00:52:58 -0700 2009 Wed Jun 24 02:28:28 -0700 2009 3 0 false false Mon Jun 16 12:10:10 -0700 2008 Wed Jun 04 13:49:18 -0700 2008 Mon Jun 16 12:10:10 -0700 2008 more...]]> 5 0 false false Sun Sep 07 00:00:00 -0700 2008 Sun Sep 07 04:14:46 -0700 2008 Sun Sep 07 04:19:43 -0700 2008 3 0 false false Wed Aug 20 16:10:38 -0700 2008 Wed Aug 20 16:11:31 -0700 2008 1 0 false false Sat Feb 01 00:00:00 -0800 2003 Wed Mar 12 15:00:44 -0700 2008 Wed Mar 12 15:00:44 -0700 2008 4 0 false false Thu Jan 31 00:00:00 -0800 2008 Wed Jan 23 20:25:32 -0800 2008 Thu Jan 31 21:05:25 -0800 2008 5 0 false false Sun Jan 01 00:00:00 -0800 2006 Mon Jul 09 07:58:04 -0700 2007 Mon Jul 09 07:59:53 -0700 2007 0 0 false false Thu Dec 03 17:52:29 -0800 2009 Thu Dec 03 17:52:41 -0800 2009 3 0 false false Tue Dec 01 09:48:49 -0800 2009 Tue Dec 01 09:48:49 -0800 2009 5 0 false false Thu Oct 13 00:00:00 -0700 2005 Wed Nov 04 09:34:35 -0800 2009 Wed Nov 04 09:34:53 -0800 2009 4 0 false false Sat Oct 31 08:32:41 -0700 2009 Sat Oct 31 08:32:41 -0700 2009 0 0 false false Sat Oct 17 11:12:45 -0700 2009 Sat Oct 17 11:12:45 -0700 2009 0 0 false false Thu Oct 08 01:36:19 -0700 2009 Thu Oct 08 01:36:19 -0700 2009 0 0 false false Sat Sep 19 15:56:28 -0700 2009 Sat Sep 19 15:56:28 -0700 2009 5 0 false false Tue Sep 01 07:37:42 -0700 2009 Tue Sep 01 07:37:42 -0700 2009 3 0 false false Sun Aug 30 15:42:24 -0700 2009 Sun Aug 30 15:42:24 -0700 2009 0 0 false false Sun Aug 23 20:01:03 -0700 2009 Sun Aug 23 20:01:03 -0700 2009 http://www.goodreads.com/book_link/follow/8?book_id=120183