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120th out of 556 books
—
54 voters
If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him: The Pilgrimage Of Psychotherapy Patients
"The most important things that each man must learn no one else can teach him. Once he accepts this disappointment, he will be able to stop depending on the therapist, the guru who turns out to be just another struggling human being.”
Using the myths of Gilgamesh, Siddhartha, The Wife of Bath, Don Quixote ... the works of Buber, Ginsberg, Shakespeare, Kafka, Nin, Dante and...more
Using the myths of Gilgamesh, Siddhartha, The Wife of Bath, Don Quixote ... the works of Buber, Ginsberg, Shakespeare, Kafka, Nin, Dante and...more
Paperback, 256 pages
Published
May 1st 1982
by Bantam
(first published January 1st 1972)
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An old professor stood in front of our class and pointed to this book, saying, "This is what separates the therapists from the advice givers." It's also the book that lead me to define better my role as a therapist...and making VERY clear the separation with friends who know me as a "thoughful friend who happens to also be a therapist."
If I Meet Sheldon B. Kopp on the Road, I will Kill Him! That's what I thought when I was halfway through the If You Meet the Buddha on the Road Kill Him. Towards the end though it completely changed my perspective. Don't be biased like I was after seeing the "The Pilgrimage of Psychotherapy Patients" in the title and the continuous mention of "in therapy" throughout the book.
"The most important things that each man must learn no one can teach him. Once he accepts this disappointment, he will be...more
"The most important things that each man must learn no one can teach him. Once he accepts this disappointment, he will be...more
I read this book about every three years when things are really rough. An engaging re think of psychotherapy that is a bit 60s glib in places but in others really deep and fun and makes you laugh at yourself. He sees psycho therapy as a wrestling match between the therapist and the patient in which the latter tries to force the therapist to make him better and the therapist keeps fighting this until finally the patient gives up fighting and realizes only they can heal themselves. Then the therap...more
Wow, I first read this 28 years ago! WOW. I had been in therapy for 6 yrs at that point, and my first emotion was embarassment. When he described the initial stages of the a new patient starting in therapy, I thought, "Oh, god, you mean EVERYONE does that?!?! ARRGGHH!!" Even as I was laughing.
To this day, I remember and quote lines from the Eschatological Laundry list. For someone in the working world (and ain't we all), one of the most critical and useful (however shocking I found it initially)...more
To this day, I remember and quote lines from the Eschatological Laundry list. For someone in the working world (and ain't we all), one of the most critical and useful (however shocking I found it initially)...more
A combination of existentialism with the wisdom of therapeutic experience, Sheldon Kopp is like a therapist I wish I have. Then again, he would recommend against this very attitude, as we must ultimately pursue our own pilgrimage.
At the risk of sounding arrogant, I did not read this with a sense that I learned anything. Rather, it helped remind me of all the missteps I have been making, since I knew better than to take those routes of distraction along the road of life. But this, at the risk of...more
At the risk of sounding arrogant, I did not read this with a sense that I learned anything. Rather, it helped remind me of all the missteps I have been making, since I knew better than to take those routes of distraction along the road of life. But this, at the risk of...more
This book wasn't quite what I was expecting, and all the more valuable for that. I appreciated the insights into what psychotherapy looks like from the therapist's side of the room, and there were plenty of insights to pick up like the "colorful beach pebbles collected as a hedge against the too unmarked openness of sea and sky" of the author's own pilgrimage. The author's perspective on the meaning of life was refreshing for me. The 1972 book seems somewhat dated in places, as a mere time capsu...more
Psychotherapist Kopp wrote this book in 1972, but it still works today. This book is a wonderful read for anyone who wonders, worries or agonizes about the meaning of life, and whether they're doing it "right."
Whether giving or receiving therapy, this book reminds us that we are all humans -- nobody has all the answers. The eschatological laundry list (which I've seen roaming around the web, but never attributed to Kopp) has become a classic.
1. This is it!
2. There are no hidden meanings
3. You...more
Whether giving or receiving therapy, this book reminds us that we are all humans -- nobody has all the answers. The eschatological laundry list (which I've seen roaming around the web, but never attributed to Kopp) has become a classic.
1. This is it!
2. There are no hidden meanings
3. You...more
This book was written in 1972, and I found the rhetoric so outdated that at times it overwhelmed the incredible ideas presented. Only masculine pronouns are used and Kopp relies steadily on gender essentialism, actually referencing something called “female wisdom.” Nobody approaches psychology through this lens any more! I found the chapter on The Pilgrimage of the Youth almost unreadable, wherein he describes his experiences as a Hipster in the forties. Intriguing archival footage, but it wasn’...more
I picked this book up based on a recommendation from a friend.
The book gives examples of different types of pilgrimage, and looks at the motives behind each, comparing them to the journey psychotherapy patients goes in their quest for peace of mind.
The basic message behind the book is that you don't need a guru/teacher/psychotherapist to attain peace, since you already possess the knowledge you need and must look for meaning within rather than solutions from others.
"If you meet the Buddha on the...more
The book gives examples of different types of pilgrimage, and looks at the motives behind each, comparing them to the journey psychotherapy patients goes in their quest for peace of mind.
The basic message behind the book is that you don't need a guru/teacher/psychotherapist to attain peace, since you already possess the knowledge you need and must look for meaning within rather than solutions from others.
"If you meet the Buddha on the...more
Amazing book written by a psychotherapist to his patients. The book encompasses the idea of self-actualization and relying on oneself for answers instead of looking to others for validation. The author found himself in the uncomfortable position of being a "guide" to his patients in this life and he wrote it with the motivation that: "if you meet the Buddha in the road, kill him" from the I Ching; basically to say that we are all on a journey of our own, and though some may have better perspecti...more
I was one of the several who picked this up after it was mentioned on the television show "Fringe" as being the favorite book of one of the main characters. I have no background in psychology and have never been in therapy, but can say it was well worth the 2 month wait for a battered paperback to come in through interlibrary loan.
Full of fantastic quotes, interspersed with narrative (which occasionally meanders a bit -- though staying true to the nature of the book), I'll agree with another rev...more
Full of fantastic quotes, interspersed with narrative (which occasionally meanders a bit -- though staying true to the nature of the book), I'll agree with another rev...more
Fantastic book for anybody in therapy. Anybody that tells you they have all the answers is a wolf in sheep's clothing. The whole book is worth the axioms at the end. Enjoy!
There are a lot of good ideas in this book, and much of it is compelling reading. Take what you can and discard the rest.
Full review: http://bit.ly/XkHa6l
Full review: http://bit.ly/XkHa6l
Excellent book. Kopp is brutally honest and his words cut deep. Here is one of my favorite excerpts:
"Whether pilgrim or wayfarer, while seeking to be taught the Truth (or something), the disciple learns only that there is nothing that anyone else can teach him. He learns, once he is willing to give up being taught, that he already knows how to live, that it is implied in his own tale. The secret is that there is no secret. Everything is just what it seems to be. This is it! There are no hidden m...more
"Whether pilgrim or wayfarer, while seeking to be taught the Truth (or something), the disciple learns only that there is nothing that anyone else can teach him. He learns, once he is willing to give up being taught, that he already knows how to live, that it is implied in his own tale. The secret is that there is no secret. Everything is just what it seems to be. This is it! There are no hidden m...more
an absolute stunner of a book and made me realise a lot about myself and my relationship with others. i bought this book around 5 years ago but stopped reading it saying, thinnking to myself that i am possibly not ready for it. it was a wise decision. i am better prepared now to read it.hence i think i appreciated it much more.
rarely comes along a book, thta makes you sit up and think on every chapter and every page. it must be having the largest number of page folds amongst all my books. i thin...more
rarely comes along a book, thta makes you sit up and think on every chapter and every page. it must be having the largest number of page folds amongst all my books. i thin...more
I went into reading this book with an expectation that I knew what to expect. What I got out of the book was far more than I believed. Along with the realization that I had no idea what I was thinking, I found parts pissed me off, parts made me happy, parts made me introspective, and other parts made me cry. At no point did I feel I was wasting my time reading the book. While some of the material is definitely dated, and my copy had been updated to include both genders (at certain points), I fel...more
I read this while a teenager at the request of my Father. I don't know why, since I wasn't into any "subversive" groups (at the worst, it was the Girl Scouts), but the content has really helped me as I grew up and developed an interest into alternative religion. The lack of "googly-eyes" in this field, where almost everyone who publishes a book gains and ego and expects fawning followers, and they just don't impress me.
I do make mistakes now and then, but I can't help but weed out "fluffy-bunny...more
I do make mistakes now and then, but I can't help but weed out "fluffy-bunny...more
Oct 04, 2011
Bob Parks
rated it
3 of 5 stars
Recommended to Bob by:
Peter Bishop
Shelves:
non-fiction
Mr. Fili, my high school English teacher, used to say this to us; I remember seeing this book on the shelves at Walden Books when I was young and interested in New Age/Old Age philosophy. When Peter Bishop mentioned that this was his favorite book and why, I thought it would be good to pick it up and read it. Glad I did.
It's not so much a self improvement book as a book to prepare you for therapy. He makes that point very clear and I liked that. I enjoyed his use of literature and examples of th...more
It's not so much a self improvement book as a book to prepare you for therapy. He makes that point very clear and I liked that. I enjoyed his use of literature and examples of th...more
Made me not want to read any book related to therapy ever again. The last "How To:" Get on with it. I'll think I'll write a Daybook for Neurotics after this just to drive the point home... Day 1: Damn. Life Has No Meaning, Day 2 - 365: Stop Worrying About It. The following 370 pages will be filled with gibberish and illustrations by children in third world countries divorced from the explanations of the "Therapists" that seek to find meaning in the abyss. It is just 'the abyss.' You are not that...more
My rating is more about the format of the book. This is the first time I listen to a book instead of reading it and it is quite a challenge!
I agree with some of the things I heard and disagree with some points, especially those concerning religion and how it is not to be used as a guide in one's life. I understand we all need to find a way but religion must be there to govern or we'd all go wild ;p
I didn't understand some parts and I wondered off in many ;p therefore I'm going to listen to it ag...more
I agree with some of the things I heard and disagree with some points, especially those concerning religion and how it is not to be used as a guide in one's life. I understand we all need to find a way but religion must be there to govern or we'd all go wild ;p
I didn't understand some parts and I wondered off in many ;p therefore I'm going to listen to it ag...more
Really enjoying the message, except for the author's struggle with the plight of the female. Ironically I think the stories that he adds in order to give examples or clarification are distracting from the meat of the book, I think they're just too archaic for me.
--*after finishing*--
It's funny that I've had this sitting on my shelf for over three years, and I just now picked it up to read it and found so many parallels with what I'm thinking and going through presently. At times, synchronicity i...more
--*after finishing*--
It's funny that I've had this sitting on my shelf for over three years, and I just now picked it up to read it and found so many parallels with what I'm thinking and going through presently. At times, synchronicity i...more
It has been quite a while since a book turned my brain inside out with thoughts. I have been struggling since I started reading this book to describe it. It doesn’t seem to fit into any category. Chicken soup for the mind? Self-help psychology? I don’t know what to call it, but everyone should read it.
I guess it is a book about unlearning all the harmful ways we relate to the world and to ourselves. It is about recognizing the coping mechanisms we all have, and how harmful they are, and how we...more
I guess it is a book about unlearning all the harmful ways we relate to the world and to ourselves. It is about recognizing the coping mechanisms we all have, and how harmful they are, and how we...more
This book is a good therapy session for the atheist/agnostic who loves to deal with the ‘big questions’ inside their head, or is too poor to see a psychologist.
I would not rule out that a religious person could get a lot of this book, as I’m sure they could. However, I think those with literal interpretations of holy books would have a hard time with what Dr. Kopp recognizes as the first step in any patient’s pilgrimage: there is no point to anything, and this world is all that we have.
If You S...more
I would not rule out that a religious person could get a lot of this book, as I’m sure they could. However, I think those with literal interpretations of holy books would have a hard time with what Dr. Kopp recognizes as the first step in any patient’s pilgrimage: there is no point to anything, and this world is all that we have.
If You S...more
Mar 24, 2009
Leslie
rated it
5 of 5 stars
·
review of another edition
Recommended to Leslie by:
Doug Knowlton
Shelves:
psychology
Doug, wise friend from The Village Bookstore and Writers Group, recommended this book to me. It's interesting and thought-provoking. Kopp compares psychotherapy to a spiritual journey, and by the end of the book, I knew it was just that. He takes seveal classic books and shows us the pilgrim's path and compares them to different aspects of therapy and the therapeutic relationship. I love the author's honesty and openness, sharing his own life and struggles.
When I saw the title, I thought, why w...more
When I saw the title, I thought, why w...more
Started off well, the tales from various literature along with the psychological interpretations are interesting. I really loved the tale of Gilgamesh - it can already make a great epic film! But somewhere down the line I felt that I got what it was trying to say, and it kept saying the same thing with various illustrations. Maybe, it did put forth different ideas; but I feel this is the reason I am not cut-out to read out and out non-fiction books. Be it physics, or psychology, or paranormal mu...more
This book was first published in 1972, and it shows its age. Everything Kopp writes is colored by his adolescence in the 40's, his work with patients through the 60's and early 70's, his own life experiences during those years. But since I'd never read it when it originally came out, I did enjoy reading it now.
Kopp describes the work of psychotherapy patients as a pilgrimage, and talks about what type of journey he thinks that pilgrimage should be. An underlying belief is that each of us must he...more
Kopp describes the work of psychotherapy patients as a pilgrimage, and talks about what type of journey he thinks that pilgrimage should be. An underlying belief is that each of us must he...more
An interesting book that is not in print anymore. Written in the 70's, I guess some of it is out of date (patients named Willo, a huge emphasis on the women's lib movement and references to computer cards and paper that feels like Xeroxed copies) but the basic principles presented are timeless. Life is not fair, bad things just sometimes happen, we have no choice but to deal with it and we should try to make things better. And, no one else can do it for us. Thus the title...the Buddha is within...more
So I randomly ordered this book after it played a very small role in Fringe (Peter's favorite book that he orders for Fauxlivia, "because you asked."). I figured it would be quick and I didn't realize the subtitle was about psychotherapy patients. Overall an odd read for me, I probably didn't give it the time it deserved with school starting, but interesting none-the-less. Clearly influenced in several ways by a classic favorite of mine, the Canterbury Tales. Fun read if you're into that sort of...more
The ideas of this book really moved me in the beginning. The problem is that from the middle of the book to the end, nothing significantly new presented, no new perspectives..
In a few words, its a great book to read but its a little too long for its contents.
And as the light motif of the book - All the answers are within ourselves, the problem is that there are no answers. The magic is to learn living with that.
In a few words, its a great book to read but its a little too long for its contents.
And as the light motif of the book - All the answers are within ourselves, the problem is that there are no answers. The magic is to learn living with that.
This book really changed my mind about therapy. Kopp has a way of making unfathomable things seem normal and normal things seem blissful. He makes sense out of the nonsensical and echoes a Buddhist compassion that actually makes me want therapy, even if it is fundamentally unnecessary. A mesmerizing and stress-relieving read.
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Mar 07, 2011 03:53am