Agorafabulous!: Dispatches from My Bedroom by Sara Benincasa

Feb 19, 2012 Robin rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: adult

After trudging through the super-depressing read, "The Garden State," (where no one wins and gives my state an awful send-off) here is a well-written memoir, "Agorafabulous! Dispatches From My Bedroom" written by comedian and former New Jerseyan, Sara Benincasa. I literally could not put this book down. When it came down to the very last page (despite my hatred for Jersey Shore) I victoriously fist pumped in the air. Yeah, it was thaaaaat good.

Sara experienced panic anxiety at a young age. When...more After trudging through the super-depressing read, "The Garden State," (where no one wins and gives my state an awful send-off) here is a well-written memoir, "Agorafabulous! Dispatches From My Bedroom" written by comedian and former New Jerseyan, Sara Benincasa. I literally could not put this book down. When it came down to the very last page (despite my hatred for Jersey Shore) I victoriously fist pumped in the air. Yeah, it was thaaaaat good.

Sara experienced panic anxiety at a young age. When she got older, her battle with it became more extreme to the point of not wanting to leave her house (even having fears of the sink and toilet). But she overcame her fears, got help, and now travels around the world to educate others on her experiences. In point, she makes others feel like they are not alone.

Her book takes you through a high school trip to Sicily (reading about her classmate Amber made me cringe and was the exact reason I don't attend my high school reunions) where her panic anxiety really starts to kick in being far away from home, living in Boston with fear of leaving her studio apartment, moving back to New Jersey with a desire to make smoothies and give herself a make-over (which didn't turn out as she planned), working for an INSANE man (I literally have no other words to describe Edgar) on hippie-ish grounds in Pennsylvania to stabalize a job for herself, enjoying time in North Carolina, teaching 9th grade students in Texas with a very awkward in-class incident, and finding out her true passion in life...comedy and making others laugh.

Aside from reading about Sara's experiences, I really loved reading about her parents and the dialogue exchanged between them. Her mother, who had to endure almost 5 hours of Dave Matthews Band's "Satellite" on repeat driving her home from Boston, cautiously asking, "Do we have to bring it (the cd) inside?" when arriving in the driveway of their home. Her father, who seems like an incredibly easygoing guy. She's lucky. There are a lot of people out there that lack the support system she has to help them through this kind of ordeal. Sadly, when the support system is lacking and resources are not available, things can turn out for the worst. Thankfully this isn't the case for her.

Despite my state glorifying orange, juicy, guidos that do nothing but sleep, drink, and etc..., or certain housewives that raise spoiled children and backstab one another, I'm proud that amidst all the hype there are smart, unique individuals that hail from my state and can make me proud. Sara Benincasa is one of them.(less)

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May 22, 2012 Tim Niland rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2012-reads

Sara Benincasa is a reporter, blogger and stand-up comic. The fact that she could accomplish all of these things in the midst of crippling depression, anxiety and even suicidal thoughts is amazing and inspiring. Her book is quite funny, but serious at the same time, as she talks about a debilitating panic attack that briefly hospitalized her during a student trip to Italy made worse by a group of mean kids bent on tormenting her. When she was in college, she developed a debilitating fear of leav...more

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Mar 16, 2012 Wendi rated it 5 of 5 stars

This book deserves five stars. Maybe I'm biased, but this is the absolute best explanation of Agoraphobia. Because it's not written by a clinician but by someone who knows the whole experience.

In 2001 I was diagnosed with agoraphobia. I was at Wal-Mart looking for shelf liner. I stood in the aisle and felt a feeling similar to vertigo - everything around started to tilt one way, the shelves leaned in toward me and I suddenly couldn't breathe. I had to get out! The crazy thing is I used to work...more This book deserves five stars. Maybe I'm biased, but this is the absolute best explanation of Agoraphobia. Because it's not written by a clinician but by someone who knows the whole experience.

In 2001 I was diagnosed with agoraphobia. I was at Wal-Mart looking for shelf liner. I stood in the aisle and felt a feeling similar to vertigo - everything around started to tilt one way, the shelves leaned in toward me and I suddenly couldn't breathe. I had to get out! The crazy thing is I used to work there, so it wasn't even like it was some new place.

On my way home I had to pull the car over because I started to see black dots and couldn't drive straight. I couldn't figure out what was going on, I just knew that something was wrong. Really, really wrong.

Benincasa writes about the voice in her head telling her what a loser she is, if she leaves her apartment she's going to die, she should die! I know that voice. The earliest that I can remember hearing this voice was some time in 5th grade. The voice told me the world was unsafe. Everything was unsafe. And I was going to die. And that feeling stayed with me the rest of my life.

So much of what Benincasa wrote is also true of my own journey. I had very, very specific people who I could trust. They were my safety people. They were the ones I trusted to drive me around. If I got sick these few people were the only ones I trusted to not let me die. Every time I went without a safety person I got "sick". Sick really meant that my anxiety levels were rising and my body was registering that anxiety by giving me stomach aches, dizziness, my body temperature fluctuating from cold to hot almost instantaneously. It's an awful feeling!

By college the voice was very loud. My freshman semester I lost 25 pounds in two months. I just stopped eating. Eating meant I could get food poisoning and if I got food poisoning I would throw up and if I threw up I would die. That was my thinking. I was all alone at school. My safety people were all at other schools. I finished the semester and returned to school at a university an hour away from home where my high school BF was going. She was my roommate, I was safe again.

My husband became the replacement safety person when my parents moved from Alabama to Tucson. But my depression - because you just can't be agoraphobic, you get the joys of depression too! - sunk me.

Fast forward 2001 - my husband has moved to Florida from Pennsylvania, and though I'm surrounded by aunts and uncles and cousins I have no safety people. None. I spent three nights going back and forth to the ER for unexplained chest pains, nausea, horrible dizzy spells. Finally someone I knew from community theater who also happened to be the on call psychiatry practitioner actually figured out what was going on. She found a bed for me in the psychiatric ward at the hospital and I spent the following three weeks learning about my illnesses and being treated for them. Three weeks I barely remember because along with agoraphobia and depression there's a fun little side effect of memory loss.

After reading Agorafabulous I'm not embarrassed (at least not right now) about my mental illness. Yes MENTAL ILLNESS! I'm actually certified crazy! I was in a psyche ward for three weeks because I was crazy.

Okay, now that that is out of my system I want to recommend this book to everybody - both the ill and the people who love the ill. Sara gets it. She understands. She explains it so easily. So read it and find comfort that you will, one day with work, be a little less crazy. Like she is. Like I am now. Ask your friends who have loved you through it or who don't know about it to read this book. So they can understand and love you even more. (less)

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Feb 29, 2012 Maria rated it 5 of 5 stars

The book came out on Valentine's Day and has been staring at me since than to be read. I LOVE the cover. Sara is very candid and very funny. These are my favorite kind of books. Honestly and telling it like it is in a very real way is exactly how I like my female counterparts although I could never be as funny as Sara.

Sara is a great storyteller who uses truth and humor in a way that makes you feel you are talking to her not reading her book. Certainly people who meet her after reading her feel...more

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Feb 19, 2012 Antonia rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: 2012

In 2008 I stumbled upon the youtube channel of Miss Benincasa as I was doing a youtube search of Mr. Neil Gaiman. There was a video of Mr. Gaiman where he was discussing the Comic Book Legal Defense Fund. Off to the side another video was suggested and it was a "Family Hour" video of Sara in her family home walking around talking about bathroom decor. I was intrigued and I found her to be funny and in a weird way watching her video felt like watching a friend. I subscribed to her channel but nev...more

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Feb 17, 2012 Alla rated it 5 of 5 stars

“Agorafabulous” by Sara Benincasa is partly based on her one-woman show of the same name, and basically chronicles her battle with agoraphobia and debilitating fear, ultimately helping the author recover and find her true calling in the world—to be a stand-up comedian.

The book opens up with a typical tale from the author’s life: She is eighteen years old and present on a school trip to Sicily. Suddenly, during a class trip to the beach, Benincasa is inundated with panic attacks and unable to le...more “Agorafabulous” by Sara Benincasa is partly based on her one-woman show of the same name, and basically chronicles her battle with agoraphobia and debilitating fear, ultimately helping the author recover and find her true calling in the world—to be a stand-up comedian.

The book opens up with a typical tale from the author’s life: She is eighteen years old and present on a school trip to Sicily. Suddenly, during a class trip to the beach, Benincasa is inundated with panic attacks and unable to leave the gas station bathroom, even as the two teachers outside will her to come out (which she does, and immediately falls to the ground, gets injured, and is driven by the school bus to the Sicilian hospital, all the while her class mates hate her for ruining their class trip). The way the author recounts this, is simultaneously sad and hilarious—as are much of the stories in this book.

This first story is followed by more chronologically-included train-wreck like tales from the author’s life: her nervous breakdown while a student at Boston’s Emerson College, her fascination with smoothies following an eating disorder, her job at a spiritual sanctuary with a sketchy boss, her stint as a teacher at an artsy Texas high school that doesn’t require college degrees, her move to New York, her relationships, and ultimately her recovery.

It’s a fun read, and you get the impression the author definitely has a talent for comedic writing. While on the surface things appear nice and breezy, it’s interesting to realize that beneath all of the author’s jokes and entertaining stories are some deep issues such as: mental breakdowns, agoraphobia, depression, eating disorders, some unhealthy relationships, and ultimately the search for an authentic self (for the author, it just happens to be deciding to become a stand-up comedian rather than a teacher). Thus this memoir caters to both: readers looking for a comedy-inspired memoir, and readers looking for some substance underneath. (less)

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Feb 16, 2012 Gaby rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: nonfiction, memoirs

Even if you don't usually read memoirs, you still might enjoy Agorafabulous! Sara Benincasa is hilarious while being quite frank about what it was like to deeply depressed and agoraphobic. There's no sugarcoating here but her frankness and sense of humor leaves one sympathizing and relating to what she went through. While it's hard to read about bowls of pee in Le Creuset bowls to avoid entering the bathroom, Benincasa makes you understand just how one might feel this way.

Benincasa takes us to d...more

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Feb 15, 2012 Leeswammes rated it 4 of 5 stars

Sara Benincasa tells in an amusing way about her mental illness, agoraphobia. She had been having panic attacks before, but on a high school trip to Italy, she had a panic attack while travelling in a bus and had to be taken to hospital.

Later, as a college student, her illness develops for the worse. Even though she’s been taking medication, she becomes so frightened of leaving the house, that she stays indoors all the time. Even worse, she knows there’s something scary about the bathroom and re...more

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Feb 14, 2012 Nancy rated it 4 of 5 stars

Wow. This is one of the most well written and courageous memoirs I have ever read. It is not a woman wallowing in self-pity or exacting revenge against all of her enemies by publishing a book and point out THEIR short-comings. It is simply an honest and detailed look at Sara Benincasa's journey through adulthood neurosis.

The book begins with the author's high school years - one year in particular. A beloved boy she loved from afar, perfect in every possible way, including kind, handsome, and sel...more Wow. This is one of the most well written and courageous memoirs I have ever read. It is not a woman wallowing in self-pity or exacting revenge against all of her enemies by publishing a book and point out THEIR short-comings. It is simply an honest and detailed look at Sara Benincasa's journey through adulthood neurosis.

The book begins with the author's high school years - one year in particular. A beloved boy she loved from afar, perfect in every possible way, including kind, handsome, and selfless, commits a heinous Catholic sin of suicide. This is the beginning of further unhinging her carefully constructed power and control of her debilitating fears and panic attacks.

At the age of 18, the author takes an 8 day tour of Europe with other high school students where she has a full-blow panic attack and details it in excruciating detail. Not excruciating for a person who does not suffer from any Axis II diagnosis (DSM-IV talk) but oh-so-familiar to a self-proclaimed neurotic who spent her own first two and half decades pretending to be normal but knowing she had all the secret and special powers to know from vibes that danger lurked and could only be avoided by litanies and unexplainable compensating behaviors.

A blessing of being neurotic is that we are magical. It's a gift. And a curse. Just as Monk.

Just a little warning that I was unprepared for - the author provides a brief and humorous summary of her own phobias in the first few pages. That is not the shocking part, in fact, it is very endearing. But it is peppered with sexual innuendo and swear words indicating such innuendo. In other words, the "f" bomb is abundant. That's when I nearly put the book down but I didn't. I was hypnotically entranced. There were moments she was telling my story except that I have expertly shoved those unpleasant detailed memories into compartments and duct taped them well. Not Sara. She owns her behavior and all disturbing thought processes in all its glory.

Chronologically ordered, Sara begins at age 18 and works forward. She tells about all the unspeakable habits she began in order to avoid The Thing that sat on her shoulder, her head, or her chest. She is heroic to me for freeing all of those thoughts and behaviors for the rest of us neurotics.

Clearly comedy is her forte and her timing is impeccable. Just as I was getting so sucked up into her life, thoughts, and relating all-to-well, she drops humor that made me chuckle, laugh out loud, or at least smile. Again, the timing is a thing of art. She does not belabor any part of her story, including the humor which could prove to be distracting and an attempt to over compensate. Instead, it is just enough to break up the seriousness of the illness. She does not minimize the part anxiety and depression played on her life but fully owns it. She lays it all out in spite of the fact that people she knows are going to read this book. She clearly states that there are two kinds of freaks; the kind who seek to be freaks like Lee Redmond from Salt Lake City who grew her fingernails to be like dragon claws and freaks who are purposely hiding their freakishness and wondering why ANYBODY would seek to be a freak. The latter is the club of neurotics.

This is not a simple and clean little story of how the author suffers from phobias and depression then gets better. The author instead provides brief snapshots of pivotal moments during her journey, hitting the lows (peppered with appropriate amount of humor) and her slow and not complete recovery. How can there be a recovery when "normal" was never a part of her original self? Like my children and I joke about our own neuroses, "Normal is a setting on the dryer."

This is an honest, frank, yet humorous journey through the eyes of a wise, courageous woman who seeks a place of peace and accepts the woman she is. (less)

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Feb 06, 2012 Mandy rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: books-reviewed-for-wellreadwife-com

Humorous memoir is my favorite genre (any book with hot and/or sad/ sparkly vampires being a distant second), and I read pretty much every humorous memoir written by a woman that comes out. However, I don’t write about all of them. I only write about the ones that I really enjoy. The ones that make me laugh out loud, cringe, and cry at all the right moments. Agorafabulous by Sara Benincasa is one of those books. Pitch perfect and wickedly funny, Sara had me laughing along with her story of her t...more

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Mar 29, 2012 Carol rated it 4 of 5 stars

Some images from this book...a pretty curly-haired half-Italian college-age woman sitting on the toilet rocking back and forth, softly singing the hymn "Be Not Afraid." The same woman trapped by her own mind in her bedroom, peeing into Le Creuset bowls. The same woman being escorted through an anti-abortion protest by two girls who distract her by admiring her earrings. Benincasa has suffered from a particularly acute type of agoraphobia that has resulted in debilitating panic attacks and at a p...more

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Dec 05, 2012 Owen rated it 2 of 5 stars

The title of this book is very misleading. I only picked it up because it deals with agoraphobia, something I am quite familiar.

I've kind of known for a few years that I am agoraphobic. I just thought that it was mostly social awkwardness, but I also have anxiety and all that other good stuff. But it isn't as bad as the author, who has major panic attacks and takes drastic measures such as peeing in cereal bowls as to not leave her bed. I am a bit more functional and I have very, I guess you cou...more

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Feb 29, 2012 Megan C. rated it 4 of 5 stars

You know what I love? Funny women writing honestly about mental illness.
This book caught my eye during a slow day at work and because I am somewhat familiar with the author's bathtub interview show I decided to give it a read (although to be fair, I was pretty much on board the moment I read the jacket flap description and learned that at some point in the book, the author was going to write about her time peeing into cereal bowls. Anxiety disorders, Jersey girls, urine in places it was never in...more

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Mar 15, 2012 AllAmerican IndianGirl rated it 5 of 5 stars

Review from AllAmericanIndianGirl.com:

I have met Sara Benincasa exactly twice in my life. I liked her immediately, being logical enough to appreciate it when obvious depth and genuine kindness come wrapped up in witty little packages. Most of my best friends fall into this category. Except for the bitchy ones, but they know where the bodies are buried, so… Anyway, all I really knew about her when my copy of Agorafabulous arrived was that it was a memoir, and that she was someone I knew I dug.

Wel...more

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Feb 14, 2012 Jennifer Rayment rated it 5 of 5 stars

The Good Stuff

The description of the history of Sicily will have you laughing your ass off
A self deprecating honest look at life with a mental illness in a hopeful yet extremely hilarious way - this to me is hugely important and should be required readings for those dealing with these types of issues - things will get better no matter what
Doesn't blame her illness on anyone and doesn't go go all self-pity about it - just honest, straight to the point and did I mention OMG hilarious
Love the b...more

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Mar 08, 2012 Angel rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: biography-and-memoir, humor, health-and-medicine

Sara Benincasa tells the story of how she struggled with and learned to cope and overcome her mental health issues. Ms. Benincasa suffers from anxiety disorder, including very aggressive panic attacks that immobilized her. At times, she could not even leave her house due to her fears. There are few good messages in this book.

1. The power of humor. Humor helped her cope and grow. Humor also led her to find her true path as a comedian and writer.

2. The power of persistence. Hard as it was for her...more Sara Benincasa tells the story of how she struggled with and learned to cope and overcome her mental health issues. Ms. Benincasa suffers from anxiety disorder, including very aggressive panic attacks that immobilized her. At times, she could not even leave her house due to her fears. There are few good messages in this book.

1. The power of humor. Humor helped her cope and grow. Humor also led her to find her true path as a comedian and writer.

2. The power of persistence. Hard as it was for her, she did persevere.

3. The power of supportive family and friends. I don't think this can be said enough.

4. Healing and rehabilitation do take time. You may fall. You get back up again.

Ms. Benincasa writes with humor and gentleness. There are some moments when you will smile and laugh. There may be a moment or two when you will grimace. There may be some awkward moments as well. That is all ok as those moments are all part of the big picture, so to speak. Readers will smile, and they will also be very moved at times. I was moved at times. The chapter on her days of teaching school in Texas, dealing with Billy's "problem" was funny but also very moving when you look at how she did handle it, which, I will say, as a former teacher myself, was probably about the best way to deal with it. Ms. Benincasa may be a better teacher than she thinks.

The book is pretty easy to read. Though I did find a couple of passages a bit too long, overall, the book makes a good reading experience. If you like memoirs, you will probably like this. If you have an interest in mental health issues, especially as they affect women, you probably want to read this book. And even though the book is written for an adult audience, I would venture to say that older, mature teens might benefit from reading as well as she deals with and discusses issues that affect teens as well.

(The note to keep the FTC, a.k.a. "The Man," happy: I got the copy of the book as prize from a book away at the Stiletto Storytime blog).
(less)

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May 05, 2013 Kelly Hager rated it 4 of 5 stars

This book is literally laugh out loud funny but as a disclaimer, there are also parts that will make you cringe. (The first example is on the second page, and is the most disturbing depiction of suicide ever. It's not graphic but it's such a horrible way to die that it stuck with me throughout the rest of the book---and will probably stick with me forever.)

Even besides being really funny, it's also thought-provoking. I always say that I'm about two steps away from being agoraphobic because I am...more

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Feb 25, 2012 Anna rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites, memoir, non-fiction

Little known fact for you, world: I’m an agoraphobe. I’ve always been anxiety/depression-prone, and then several events of 2008 took place and I suddenly found myself rather unwilling to leave my bedroom. I’m functional, mostly, if everything goes mostly ok and nobody looks at me funny on the street, or if I can get someone I trust to come along with me with promises to help me find a place to hide if I get panicky. But I’m perfectly capable of going weeks without leaving my apartment (my record...more Little known fact for you, world: I’m an agoraphobe. I’ve always been anxiety/depression-prone, and then several events of 2008 took place and I suddenly found myself rather unwilling to leave my bedroom. I’m functional, mostly, if everything goes mostly ok and nobody looks at me funny on the street, or if I can get someone I trust to come along with me with promises to help me find a place to hide if I get panicky. But I’m perfectly capable of going weeks without leaving my apartment (my record is thirty-seven days), and preferring it that way.

I’m able to turn places that aren’t my bedroom—places like work, or classrooms—into “safe” places, with effort and time, but because I’m currently in the funemployment stages of immigration, I don’t have a lot of places I have to be. Which isn’t great for me, but I mostly manage. I manage largely because I have a very patient partner who knew exactly what he was getting into. Namely, that he would be doing all the grocery shopping because I don’t go into supermarkets anymore unless it’s a life or death situation.

Oddly, like Sara, I’m a decent performer. I’ve been a tour guide, I’ve been a singer, I’ve been a teacher. I’ve made all visions of potential futures filled with the kinds of careers that require me to stand in front of people and perform. So, in most kinds of Adulting Situations, I can totally pass for Not Agoraphobic. It’s only after you’ve tried unsuccessfully five or six times to get me to go out to a new restaurant after work, or to get me into a grocery store, or to interact with me in any situation where I may not be able to perform, that it shows. One of the things I’ve learned from spending most of my time interacting with other mad people: we’re good at pretending to be normal, except when we’re not. The ways brains and their brokennesses work are myriad.

So this book. I heard about it a few weeks before it came out and immediately put my name on the hold list at the library. I was at the top; there were five people after me. Despite the fact that I’m often leery of books about mental illness (because they’re all too often of the “look at how I got better!” variety), I needed to read about a functioning agoraphobe who isn’t Paula Deen. I mean, I love Paula Deen, partly because of her history with the monster, but there’s only so much butter.

When my hold notice came in and I had the book in hand, I devoured it in one sitting (well, there was a flu-induced involuntary nap in there, but I never actually got up) and…well, I laughed uproariously at the same time I was sobbing and I got tears and snot everywhere and really freaked out the dog.

I read it emotionally and personally and, frankly, kind of developed a little crush on Sara, the kind borne of over-identification. This was exacerbated when I emailed her with a quick thank-you-for-this-book note and she promptly replied from her phone. So there might be things in this book that, read in a different mood, I would nitpick about. But I’m not going to, because today, right now, I needed this book as it came to me. This little reminder that even if I’ve got a little bit of crazybrain for the rest of my life, it doesn’t mean I can’t be awesome. It doesn’t even mean that I’m not already awesome, even if it’s sometimes buried in nonsense.

So. I really want you to read this book. I want you to read it because it’s about how I feel about so many things (though I’ve never been afraid of the bathroom, I have occasionally been inexplicably afraid of foyers), but also because it’s brilliant.(less)

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Feb 07, 2012 Wicked Lil Pixie (Natasha) rated it 4 of 5 stars

If you’ve been following the blog for awhile, you’ll know I suffer (seriously suffer) from Agoraphobia. I’m one of those people who would rather laugh about it then cry because I’d be crying a lot. For years I’ve read books about agoraphobia and not a single one has made me laugh, their all strictly self helps. Then out of nowhere and totally random, I find Sara Benincasa.

Agoraphobia usually follows panic attacks, you start to develop fears of places usually outside your home. In both mine and S...more If you’ve been following the blog for awhile, you’ll know I suffer (seriously suffer) from Agoraphobia. I’m one of those people who would rather laugh about it then cry because I’d be crying a lot. For years I’ve read books about agoraphobia and not a single one has made me laugh, their all strictly self helps. Then out of nowhere and totally random, I find Sara Benincasa.

Agoraphobia usually follows panic attacks, you start to develop fears of places usually outside your home. In both mine and Sara’s case, you end up thinking of your home as your safe place and just don’t want to leave. It’s not only that you don’t want to leave, your body starts doing all sorts of unfriendly things to make you think its safer in your home. From the shakes to rapid heart rates and to feeling like you are going to throw up everything you’ve ever eaten in your entire life. It’s no wonder we don’t want to leave the house, god only knows what will follow when you do. Hell, you might be lucky and just faint (never happens) or you’ll throw up on the first person you see. Either way, you do not want to leave your house because you know that something horrible is going to happen outside.

Sara hits it spot on with:

“So I didn’t need evidence or logic to know that something singularly terrible lay outside my door. I just needed my inner knowing, my sixth sense, the still small voice that shrieked, “YOU’RE GONNA FUCKING DIE!!” upon my awakening.”

That is exactly what an agoraphobic feels like; we’re all sorts of psychic. We just know bad shit’s gonna come, don’t tell us any different. Our bodies know more then you do. We’re all sorts of enlightened.

What Sara went through makes me cringe; I thought I had it bad. Oh no my friends, Sara takes the agoraphobia crown and sash! Imagine being terrified to use your own bathroom, so much so that you stop eating. Add depression to the mix and you have a recipe that would make most people lay down and die. But you know what, Sara survived! Sure she had set backs, but she got through it and made me laugh.

“I subscribe to the notion that if you can laugh at the shittiest moments in your life, you can transcend them. And if other people can laugh at your awful shit as well, then I guess you can officially call yourself a comedian.”

Sara shows the value of good friends and family, people you truly need when you are going through something as horrific and esteem killing as agoraphobia and depression. She keeps on trucking and ends up living, which is what all of us want to do. It starts out small and little by little you get better, slow process but big reward.

All of this isn’t as heavy as I’m making it seem, trust me. Sara is a comedian, do there are some seriously funny piss yourself moment. There’s one scene where Sara is teaching in Texas, damned if I didn’t howl really loudly. Billy had an issue, a very hard issue. And the fact that Sara hit the floor laughing IN CLASS makes her my hero.

Not only did I laugh, I cried as well. I don’t think Sara knows the true impact her book will have on someone like me. She’s shown that you can get through this bullshit mental issue, you just got to keep fighting. And a damn good sense of humor will help you through.

Thank you Sara for sharing your ups and downs, ones way similar to mine but most of all for making me laugh loudly in public. That’s right, I brough it with me outside. Nothing better then a little fresh air and the strong desire for a smoothie.(less)

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Mar 07, 2012 Hoyt rated it 4 of 5 stars

I'm a little biased towards Auntie Sara because I'm a fan of her comedy, having read her column on Wonkette for a while, then watched her awesome Youtube vids, so I'm not sure how objective I can be about the book.

I definitely have to give her props for exposing such personal information like this. I had heard some of it before in her act, and always assumed it was exaggerated, or just a story told for comic effect, but nope, actual crazy here! Hopefully people who are going through similar thin...more

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Feb 25, 2012 Colin rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: nonfiction, comedy, biography-memoir

It might be a sign that I am a bad person - someone who hangs around the scene of an accident or laughs extra loud when a dad gets hit in the balls with a baseball on Tosh.0 - but I wanted to read this book mostly because I wanted to see how someone could get to the point of peeing in bowls scattered around their bedroom. I hear Ms. Benincasa speak at a story slam, and although the story she told was not from this book, she did plug it and I was interested immediately.
Agorafabulous does deliv...more It might be a sign that I am a bad person - someone who hangs around the scene of an accident or laughs extra loud when a dad gets hit in the balls with a baseball on Tosh.0 - but I wanted to read this book mostly because I wanted to see how someone could get to the point of peeing in bowls scattered around their bedroom. I hear Ms. Benincasa speak at a story slam, and although the story she told was not from this book, she did plug it and I was interested immediately.
Agorafabulous does deliver on its promise to wow the reader with depictions of "crazy" behavior. Benincasa does pee in bowls. She does other things too, though peeing in bowls is the height of it. Her descriptions of her episodes and how they escalated is magnificently detailed. In fact it is detailed enough that I found myself becoming anxious as I read them. I think that most people have had some experience with the issues she dealt with, at least in a watered down form - when I was a child I HATED riding on buses to the point where it could have developed into a phobia, and today I can sympathize with never wanting to leave the bedroom - but for most of us, these feelings never reach the heights (depths) that the author has. Still, reading through her progression did make me think about my own issues and why mine never progressed so far.
The truth is that most of this happens early on in the memoir. The majority of Agorafabulous deals with her recovery and her search for self. She is as frank about this as she is about her darker moments. She relates her journey into the touchier-feelier world of new age mysticism and organic groceries. She takes us through the pains of bad jobs and breakups as witnessed by someone who has a good reason to worry about how she is responding to the situations. At some point it becomes obvious that the book is less a description of "crazy" person with wild behavior than it is about a young woman who thinks has lost all sense of who she is and who she wants to be but is working hard to discover these things.
This is by no means a dilution of fun. Benincasa is a comedian and her voice comes through loud and clear throughout the book. She is able to insert comedy into all parts of the book, making both the ordinary and extremely uncomfortable sections a joy to read. She furthermore manages not to sound haughty or humble in the narrative, but just...normal. Agorafabulous is a pleasure to read and I highly recommend it.(less)

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Mar 04, 2012 Kate added it

AGORAFABULOUS! by Sara Benincasa, is a hilarious and at times hard journey to read about. Sara writes about her battle with anxiety that turns into agoraphobia. Her comedic timing makes this book really fun to read even for someone who went and overcame so much.

I do not read non-fiction that often but after reading the synopsis I knew I had to get my hands on this book. I have personal experience dealing with someone in my life with anxiety and this book helped me in some ways understand this pe...more

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Jan 29, 2013 Kris rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: memoir

I think the title Agorafabulous is misleading. It makes the book sound like a lightweight romp of someone who, sure, has Agoraphobia but manages to stay trendy and chic the same time. It would also be misleading to think of this is a humor book. It's a memoir written by a comedian and it is often funny, but it is raw and deeply revealing.

There's a Henry Wadsworth Longfellow quote that I like that goes, "If we could read the secret history of our enemies we should find in each man's life sorrow a...more

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Jun 29, 2012 Kristen rated it 3 of 5 stars

This book kept falling down my to-read list as I got distracted by pretty things, but I'm glad that I finally read it. I was the weird-o laughing out loud on the elliptical at the gym, yet again (not as many moments as Tina Fey or Mindy Kaling, but it still made me laugh). I also appreciated her stories of dealing with her own personal issues. I had one of those "personal connections" that I try to force my 7th graders to make when they are reading. When Sara was describing a panic attack and ho...more

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Oct 01, 2012 Qiana rated it 4 of 5 stars

I'm going to have to reiterate what I've been feeling for a few years now, "Comedians write the best memoirs." With a few exceptions, the only autobiographies or memoirs I've been able to get through without becoming bored with the story have been written by comedians or writers with a comic/satirical style. There's something about the ability to take even the most tragic personal tales and spin them into something that you and other people can laugh at that never gets old or boring.

It helps th...more

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Jul 12, 2012 Sara rated it 4 of 5 stars

As someone who has suffered with sometimes paralyzing anxiety my whole life, I was immediately drawn to this book. Then I was surprised and comforted to find that I'm not the only person who has been nervous about leaving the house or taking a simple trip to the grocery store for fear of a panic attack. With great grace and humor, Benincasa recounts her own struggle and interesting journey. Her style reminds me a lot of the bawdy humor often employed by Laurie Notaro and Chelsea Handler. She sha...more

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Jun 03, 2012 Julie rated it 3 of 5 stars

This is the most modern of memoirs, one where you lay your dirty secrets out for all to view. Sarah Benincasas is a university student when she becomes overwhelmed with everything and retreats to her room. Becoming scared to leave, she even resorts to starting to pee in containers, scared to leave to go to the bathroom.

In a moment of clarity, she realises that she is in trouble, and calls her parents to come and pick her up and take her home. There she goes through therapy, and begins to start a...more

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Jun 26, 2012 Nicole Introvert rated it 4 of 5 stars · review of another edition

Shelves: non-fiction, memoir, humor, mental-illness

Thank you for writing this book Sara! I do not have Agoraphobia but I have had Generalized Anxiety Disorder from before I can even remember. At times I deem certain spaces as "safe" and only want to be in those spaces, so I can somewhat relate. I burst into tears when Sara spoke about bathrooms, questioning why in the hell we retreat to them as some sort of safe haven. I'm not the only one! A good, cold public toilet can be my rock in a time of crisis.

The humor was delightful and there are seve...more

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May 09, 2013 Stephanie rated it 5 of 5 stars

I loved every page of this book! Having struggled with some of the same things the author has, and using writing and humor to cope with it along the way, I related well to much of what she shared. This book is as fabulous as its title and cover art. From the first word of the book to the last, I loved it. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has had a few brain quirks to work out over the years, which may or may not have required the use of drugs and a good psychiatrist. Sara Benincasa's r...more

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Jun 15, 2012 Jacqui R rated it 4 of 5 stars

So far, I love this book. I couldn't put it down last night. Ms. Benincasa writes about living with her own mental illness in a humorous yet poignant way. The next chapter is called "Recovery" and I can't wait to start it.

Probably the best book I've read in years, I could relate to her ups and downs and loved the happy ending. If you are at times (or most of the time) uncomfortable in your own skin or just wonder how those types of people process reality, this is the book for you. One of my favo...more

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title link	preview: Agorafabulous!: Dispatches from My Bedroom
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BBCode	[url=http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11868932-agorafabulous?utm_medium=api&utm_source=blog_book][img]http://d.gr-assets.com/books/1348190926l/11868932.jpg[/img][/url] [url=http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/11868932-agorafabulous?utm_medium=api&utm_source=blog_book]Agorafabulous!: Dispatches from My Bedroom by Sara Benincasa[/url]

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