Sign in with Facebook
12th out of 24,588 books
—
93,794 voters
Discover new books on Goodreads
Sign in to see your friends' reviews:
Loading...
Loading...
Breaking Dawn (Twilight #4)
Breaking Dawn (Twilight, #4)
3.74 of 5 stars
3.74
·
rating details ·
698,549 ratings
·
39,473
reviews
WHEN YOU LOVED THE ONE WHO WAS KILLING YOU, IT LEFT YOU NO OPTIONS. How could you run, how could you fight, when doing so would hurt that beloved one? If your life was all you had to give, how could you not give it? If it was someone you truly loved?
To be irrevocably in love with a vampire is both fantasy and nightmare woven into a dangerously heightened reality for Bella...more WHEN YOU LOVED THE ONE WHO WAS KILLING YOU, IT LEFT YOU NO OPTIONS. How could you run, how could you fight, when doing so would hurt that beloved one? If your life was all you had to give, how could you not give it? If it was someone you truly loved?
To be irrevocably in love with a vampire is both fantasy and nightmare woven into a dangerously heightened reality for Bella Swan. Pulled in one direction by her intense passion for Edward Cullen, and in another by her profound connection to a werewolf Jacob Black, she has endured a tumultuous year of temptation, loss, and strife to reach the ultimate turning point. her imminent choice to either join the dark but seductive world of immortals or pursue a fully human life has become the thread from which the fate of two tribes hangs.
Now that Bella has made her decision, a startling chain of unprecedented events is about to unfold with potentially devastating and unfathomable consequences. Just when the frayed strands of Bella's life - first discovered in Twilight, then scattered and torn in New Moon and Eclipse - seem ready to heal and knit together, could they be destroyed...forever?
The astonishing, breathlessly anticipated conclusion to the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn illuminates the secrets and mysteries of this spellbinding romantic epic that has entranced millions.(less)
To be irrevocably in love with a vampire is both fantasy and nightmare woven into a dangerously heightened reality for Bella...more WHEN YOU LOVED THE ONE WHO WAS KILLING YOU, IT LEFT YOU NO OPTIONS. How could you run, how could you fight, when doing so would hurt that beloved one? If your life was all you had to give, how could you not give it? If it was someone you truly loved?
To be irrevocably in love with a vampire is both fantasy and nightmare woven into a dangerously heightened reality for Bella Swan. Pulled in one direction by her intense passion for Edward Cullen, and in another by her profound connection to a werewolf Jacob Black, she has endured a tumultuous year of temptation, loss, and strife to reach the ultimate turning point. her imminent choice to either join the dark but seductive world of immortals or pursue a fully human life has become the thread from which the fate of two tribes hangs.
Now that Bella has made her decision, a startling chain of unprecedented events is about to unfold with potentially devastating and unfathomable consequences. Just when the frayed strands of Bella's life - first discovered in Twilight, then scattered and torn in New Moon and Eclipse - seem ready to heal and knit together, could they be destroyed...forever?
The astonishing, breathlessly anticipated conclusion to the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn illuminates the secrets and mysteries of this spellbinding romantic epic that has entranced millions.(less)
Hardcover, 1st Edition, 756 pages
Published
August 2nd 2008
by Little, Brown and Company
more details...
...less detail
edit details
ISBN
031606792X
(ISBN13: 9780316067928)
edition language
English
original title
Breaking Dawn
series
characters
Friend Reviews
To see what your friends thought of this book,
please sign up.
Community Reviews
(showing
1-30
of
3,000)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
If you loved Breaking Dawn and don’t want to see it criticized, I’ll warn you now not to read my review. That being said, let me begin by saying that when I first read Twilight, I was hooked. I read New Moon in one sitting. I awaited the release of Eclipse with great anticipation. Sadly, Eclipse was the beginning of the end. It left me disappointed enough not to have high expectations for Breaking Dawn. Even at that, Breaking Dawn shattered my lowest expectations. I am stunned at the depths to w...more
If you loved Breaking Dawn and don’t want to see it criticized, I’ll warn you now not to read my review. That being said, let me begin by saying that when I first read Twilight, I was hooked. I read New Moon in one sitting. I awaited the release of Eclipse with great anticipation. Sadly, Eclipse was the beginning of the end. It left me disappointed enough not to have high expectations for Breaking Dawn. Even at that, Breaking Dawn shattered my lowest expectations. I am stunned at the depths to which this once-revered author has plunged! From this point on I will refer to Breaking Dawn as B.D., aka “Bitter Disappointment,” or, if you prefer, “Boring Depravity,” “Bloody Drama,” “Brain Drain,” or my husband’s personal favorite, “Bloody Diapers”.
Where do I begin? How about with my least favorite character, Bella? She began the series with a lot of promise. Sure, some people said that she wasn’t well defined in the first book, but I never had a problem with her. Throughout New Moon and Eclipse, her character starts to decline. In B.D., Bella becomes intolerable. This girl is unbelievably selfish. She begins the book whining about the beautiful, expensive car Edward bought her. She whines about the wedding preparations, the dress, the ring. Poor thing has to *gasp* marry the man of her dreams! The injustice! She is far more concerned about nameless, faceless people mocking her for getting married young than she is about the happiness of the man she claims to love more than life itself. And her treatment of Jacob! Where to begin? This is a good kid had the misfortune to fall in love with her and though I had issues with his manipulation of her emotions at the end of Eclipse, still, he’s a teenage guy and you have to cut him some slack. But come on, Bella! Once she realizes she loves him, but that she loves Edward more, she chooses Edward. Fine. So let the poor guy go! Let him move on with his life! But no, she has to have her cake and eat it too. She hurts both Edward, the one she has chosen, and Jacob, the one she has rejected, by refusing to cut ties with him. She claims to hate herself for hurting him, says at one point that it’s “criminal” to injure him as much as she does, but will she love him enough to let him let go and move on? Nope. She wouldn’t “feel whole” without him, so she continues to cling to him. Even after she’s married. The culmination of this extreme selfish lack of consideration for anyone’s feelings but her own is when she slips and refers to the unborn baby as “EJ”. Did she even think to consider whether Edward would be happy about having his child named after his rival? No, she just did what she darn well wanted to do, and gave no thought to what Edward would want. Bella has become a tyrant. What Queen Bella wants, Queen Bella must have.
Now, a little bit about Edward. He was what made Twilight so magical. He was mysterious, romantic, beautiful, all the many things that the hero of a good book should be. Edward stole the hearts of most of the female readers of this series. Yet, by the time you finish B.D., you find yourself either feeling terribly sorry for him because he chose such a lame heroine, or just contemptuous of him for becoming a doormat, a slave to Bella’s whims. I thought I’d scream if I had to hear him say “If it makes her happy, I’ll do it, even if it’s not what’s best for her” one more time. In B.D., the author sends the message through Edward that love and blind devotion are the same thing. They aren’t. Truly loving someone isn’t giving them free reign to stomp all over you and everything in their path, just because they think it will make them happy. Real love encompasses the occasional appropriate guidance of the loved one away from self-destructive desires toward a better way. But here, we are taught that if you love someone, you let them have what they want, all the time, without exception.
As for the story development, my greatest frustration is that the author created a very intricate world, complete with detailed descriptions of what could and could not happen in it. Then she decided not to play by these rules. Yes, I am referring to the sudden and inexplicable ability of a vampire to father a child. This felt very contrived and unbelievable, and introduced such a bizarre, nightmarish chain of events that I could hardly believe I was reading the story that began as Twilight. This baby feeds on the blood of its mother and slowly sucks her life away? Bella has to drink human blood, while she’s still human, to save her life and the life of her child? And she LIKES IT? This is the same, human Bella that turned green and almost passed out while doing blood typing in Biology class, right? Okay, I could see that her aversion to blood was going to go away after becoming a vampire. But while she was still human? Really? I felt sick the whole time I read about her drinking gallons of blood a day to sustain the child. Bleh. I still don’t get the whole scene where Edward asks Jacob to offer to make babies with Bella. What?!? Again, is this the author’s attempt at showing us the extent of true love? It was twisted and disturbing.
And the delivery of the baby…that was just plain disgusting. Bella vomiting gallons of blood, her bones snapping right and left, blood vessels popping in her eyes, Edward biting into her womb to get the baby out, and the tender moment when mommy sees baby for the first time is marred by said baby taking a bite out of her mommy. Ick! And I’ll just join the legions of people who are saying, “RENESMEE?!?” You’ve got to be kidding. This from the author who tastefully chose names like Edward, Bella, Carlisle, Alice…why didn’t she just name her “Brangelina” or “TomKat”? Or “Bedward?” I will also join the protests against Jacob imprinting on Bella and Edward’s daughter. I could see when the concept of imprinting was introduced that it would be the author’s way of making a happy ending for Jacob at the end of the story, and that was fine. I like a happy ending, and of course I wanted to see Jacob happy. But are we so inflexible that we can’t be happy with Jacob imprinting on a nice, new girl to the story? No, Bella must have her way. She can’t be happy without Jacob as a part of her life. And we’re supposed to feel happy and satisfied that she gets her way in the form of Jacob as her son-in-law? How is that a happy ending?
At the top of my list of grievances is the destruction of the message that was communicated so clearly in the first three books. Once Bella falls in love with Edward, she is confronted with some very difficult choices. If she wants to be with Edward, she must choose to leave human life behind her and become a vampire. The value of Eclipse was that it forced Bella to look long and hard at what she was choosing if she decided to become a vampire. She would have to cut ties with her human life…her mother, father, and everyone human that mattered to her. She could never have children of her own. She would have to deal with the bloodlust of being a newborn vampire. She would spend a significant amount of time developing the self-control and restraint that the rest of the Cullens had achieved. One of the most compelling elements of the first three books is Edward’s angst, his agonizing about the state of his soul as a vampire. He grieves what he sees as the loss of his soul. This is at the heart of his great reluctance to change Bella, the reason for his disappearance in New Moon. All the vampires who have chosen not to feed on humans hate what they have become. They are conflicted about who they are. None of them who remember life as a human can say with conviction that they wouldn’t go back if they could. Bella has to confront all of this and choose to sacrifice the value of her humanity for the love she feels for Edward. All of this is well and good and presents a very thought-provoking storyline. Then, in B.D., every one of these issues is neatly sidestepped in order to create an obstacle-free path to a happily-ever after ending for Queen Bella. First of all, from the moment she opens her eyes as a newborn vampire, everything is better. The world shimmers. She experiences everything so much more intensely, things are more beautiful, more colorful, more wonderful. What’s not to love about being a vampire? Within minutes, she is exhibiting the self-control that everyone else took decades to achieve. And how about the whole I-have-to-have-sex-before-I-become-a-vampire-because-all-
my-human-emotions-will-be-gone-for-awhile? Nope! Not only does she still experience all the emotions and passions she had as a human, but they are intensified! By the time we’re finished reading about Bella’s new life as a vampire, we have to wonder why anyone wouldn’t want to be a vampire. All the build-up for Bella to grow and mature through sacrifice and self-denial, wiped away. So much better for her not to have to suffer through that stuff, right? And she manages to get immortality and a baby, to boot. We have to wonder if everyone who claimed that becoming a vampire was a serious, heavy choice was just delusional. The nobility of the message is sacrificed in order to create a neat, happy ending for everyone.
I haven’t seen much, if any, speculation on what the cover of the book is trying to communicate to the reader, so here’s my take. The big white queen is, you guessed it, Queen Bella, the white vampire. The red pawn is you (or I), the blood-red reader, about to be sucked dry in the wake of the Queen’s destruction. Beware!
I wish Stephenie Meyer had ended with Twilight or at least an extended version of New Moon. I think I’ll be hauling my copies of the last three to the local library as a donation and trying to just enjoy Twilight for what it was before the rest of this mess came into play.(less)
Where do I begin? How about with my least favorite character, Bella? She began the series with a lot of promise. Sure, some people said that she wasn’t well defined in the first book, but I never had a problem with her. Throughout New Moon and Eclipse, her character starts to decline. In B.D., Bella becomes intolerable. This girl is unbelievably selfish. She begins the book whining about the beautiful, expensive car Edward bought her. She whines about the wedding preparations, the dress, the ring. Poor thing has to *gasp* marry the man of her dreams! The injustice! She is far more concerned about nameless, faceless people mocking her for getting married young than she is about the happiness of the man she claims to love more than life itself. And her treatment of Jacob! Where to begin? This is a good kid had the misfortune to fall in love with her and though I had issues with his manipulation of her emotions at the end of Eclipse, still, he’s a teenage guy and you have to cut him some slack. But come on, Bella! Once she realizes she loves him, but that she loves Edward more, she chooses Edward. Fine. So let the poor guy go! Let him move on with his life! But no, she has to have her cake and eat it too. She hurts both Edward, the one she has chosen, and Jacob, the one she has rejected, by refusing to cut ties with him. She claims to hate herself for hurting him, says at one point that it’s “criminal” to injure him as much as she does, but will she love him enough to let him let go and move on? Nope. She wouldn’t “feel whole” without him, so she continues to cling to him. Even after she’s married. The culmination of this extreme selfish lack of consideration for anyone’s feelings but her own is when she slips and refers to the unborn baby as “EJ”. Did she even think to consider whether Edward would be happy about having his child named after his rival? No, she just did what she darn well wanted to do, and gave no thought to what Edward would want. Bella has become a tyrant. What Queen Bella wants, Queen Bella must have.
Now, a little bit about Edward. He was what made Twilight so magical. He was mysterious, romantic, beautiful, all the many things that the hero of a good book should be. Edward stole the hearts of most of the female readers of this series. Yet, by the time you finish B.D., you find yourself either feeling terribly sorry for him because he chose such a lame heroine, or just contemptuous of him for becoming a doormat, a slave to Bella’s whims. I thought I’d scream if I had to hear him say “If it makes her happy, I’ll do it, even if it’s not what’s best for her” one more time. In B.D., the author sends the message through Edward that love and blind devotion are the same thing. They aren’t. Truly loving someone isn’t giving them free reign to stomp all over you and everything in their path, just because they think it will make them happy. Real love encompasses the occasional appropriate guidance of the loved one away from self-destructive desires toward a better way. But here, we are taught that if you love someone, you let them have what they want, all the time, without exception.
As for the story development, my greatest frustration is that the author created a very intricate world, complete with detailed descriptions of what could and could not happen in it. Then she decided not to play by these rules. Yes, I am referring to the sudden and inexplicable ability of a vampire to father a child. This felt very contrived and unbelievable, and introduced such a bizarre, nightmarish chain of events that I could hardly believe I was reading the story that began as Twilight. This baby feeds on the blood of its mother and slowly sucks her life away? Bella has to drink human blood, while she’s still human, to save her life and the life of her child? And she LIKES IT? This is the same, human Bella that turned green and almost passed out while doing blood typing in Biology class, right? Okay, I could see that her aversion to blood was going to go away after becoming a vampire. But while she was still human? Really? I felt sick the whole time I read about her drinking gallons of blood a day to sustain the child. Bleh. I still don’t get the whole scene where Edward asks Jacob to offer to make babies with Bella. What?!? Again, is this the author’s attempt at showing us the extent of true love? It was twisted and disturbing.
And the delivery of the baby…that was just plain disgusting. Bella vomiting gallons of blood, her bones snapping right and left, blood vessels popping in her eyes, Edward biting into her womb to get the baby out, and the tender moment when mommy sees baby for the first time is marred by said baby taking a bite out of her mommy. Ick! And I’ll just join the legions of people who are saying, “RENESMEE?!?” You’ve got to be kidding. This from the author who tastefully chose names like Edward, Bella, Carlisle, Alice…why didn’t she just name her “Brangelina” or “TomKat”? Or “Bedward?” I will also join the protests against Jacob imprinting on Bella and Edward’s daughter. I could see when the concept of imprinting was introduced that it would be the author’s way of making a happy ending for Jacob at the end of the story, and that was fine. I like a happy ending, and of course I wanted to see Jacob happy. But are we so inflexible that we can’t be happy with Jacob imprinting on a nice, new girl to the story? No, Bella must have her way. She can’t be happy without Jacob as a part of her life. And we’re supposed to feel happy and satisfied that she gets her way in the form of Jacob as her son-in-law? How is that a happy ending?
At the top of my list of grievances is the destruction of the message that was communicated so clearly in the first three books. Once Bella falls in love with Edward, she is confronted with some very difficult choices. If she wants to be with Edward, she must choose to leave human life behind her and become a vampire. The value of Eclipse was that it forced Bella to look long and hard at what she was choosing if she decided to become a vampire. She would have to cut ties with her human life…her mother, father, and everyone human that mattered to her. She could never have children of her own. She would have to deal with the bloodlust of being a newborn vampire. She would spend a significant amount of time developing the self-control and restraint that the rest of the Cullens had achieved. One of the most compelling elements of the first three books is Edward’s angst, his agonizing about the state of his soul as a vampire. He grieves what he sees as the loss of his soul. This is at the heart of his great reluctance to change Bella, the reason for his disappearance in New Moon. All the vampires who have chosen not to feed on humans hate what they have become. They are conflicted about who they are. None of them who remember life as a human can say with conviction that they wouldn’t go back if they could. Bella has to confront all of this and choose to sacrifice the value of her humanity for the love she feels for Edward. All of this is well and good and presents a very thought-provoking storyline. Then, in B.D., every one of these issues is neatly sidestepped in order to create an obstacle-free path to a happily-ever after ending for Queen Bella. First of all, from the moment she opens her eyes as a newborn vampire, everything is better. The world shimmers. She experiences everything so much more intensely, things are more beautiful, more colorful, more wonderful. What’s not to love about being a vampire? Within minutes, she is exhibiting the self-control that everyone else took decades to achieve. And how about the whole I-have-to-have-sex-before-I-become-a-vampire-because-all-
my-human-emotions-will-be-gone-for-awhile? Nope! Not only does she still experience all the emotions and passions she had as a human, but they are intensified! By the time we’re finished reading about Bella’s new life as a vampire, we have to wonder why anyone wouldn’t want to be a vampire. All the build-up for Bella to grow and mature through sacrifice and self-denial, wiped away. So much better for her not to have to suffer through that stuff, right? And she manages to get immortality and a baby, to boot. We have to wonder if everyone who claimed that becoming a vampire was a serious, heavy choice was just delusional. The nobility of the message is sacrificed in order to create a neat, happy ending for everyone.
I haven’t seen much, if any, speculation on what the cover of the book is trying to communicate to the reader, so here’s my take. The big white queen is, you guessed it, Queen Bella, the white vampire. The red pawn is you (or I), the blood-red reader, about to be sucked dry in the wake of the Queen’s destruction. Beware!
I wish Stephenie Meyer had ended with Twilight or at least an extended version of New Moon. I think I’ll be hauling my copies of the last three to the local library as a donation and trying to just enjoy Twilight for what it was before the rest of this mess came into play.(less)
1200 likes · like · see review
Aug 09, 2008
Annalisa
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
girls who like a happy ending at all cost
I was so disenchanted with Eclipse I wasn't excited for this read, but I had to know how it ends. I held off judgment in hopes that the conclusion would redeem the series. The verdict? Hard-to-swallow soap opera. A car crash you can't stop staring at in hopes that something salvageable comes out of the wreckage. But nothing does. So bad I started taking notes on all the plot holes because I couldn't keep track. What happened to the story that captured the hearts of girls everywhere?
You can't fal...more I was so disenchanted with Eclipse I wasn't excited for this read, but I had to know how it ends. I held off judgment in hopes that the conclusion would redeem the series. The verdict? Hard-to-swallow soap opera. A car crash you can't stop staring at in hopes that something salvageable comes out of the wreckage. But nothing does. So bad I started taking notes on all the plot holes because I couldn't keep track. What happened to the story that captured the hearts of girls everywhere?
You can't fall in love with your characters so much you save them from the dilemma you created: the impossibilities of vampire and human love, the instinctual need to destroy between vampires and werewolves, the girl who has to choose between two boys in opposing worlds, the boy who gets left out, the girl who has to make massive sacrifices for her choice. You can't save them from the plot by taking it all back and saying "never mind the rules I created, you can all have it all without giving anything up for it." When you do that, you take an exciting premise, take all the fire and excitement out, and ruin the story. As an author, you have a responsibility to your story, your characters, your fans, even yourself as a creator, to let the story be.
I recommend you write your own ending. Or better yet (since I'm not really a fan of fan fiction), take your book back and get your money back. If everyone does, maybe Meyer will pretend it was a big joke and rewrite a plausible ending to the saga. Maybe this time her editor (and copy editor) will actually read it. By the double-digit errors I found not even looking I doubt he/she did.
What I expected from this story:
1. The big dilemma. In Eclipse Meyer finally showed the downfall of vampire life. Bella has to give up her family, the potential of her own family, her friendship with Jacob, and the ease of human life out in the open. Most importantly she takes on the internal moral struggle of an instinct to kill, of being a monster. This is serious sacrifice and I wanted to see some soul searching, some grieving, some preparation for death from Bella.
2. Vampire sex. Vampire trying not to kill human sex. Newborn vampire with unquenchable passion sex. No harlequin romance graphic, but like Twilight explored kissing, exploring how they could possibly do that.
3. One scary newborn vampire. Murderous screaming during the transition after a bite from Edward to save her from death. The rage, the passion, the strength, and most importantly the thirst, the unquenchable thirst, that overpowers all that is human. I wanted to see Bella going after a human, preferably someone she knows, and have to be restrained. I wanted to see the true monster that is vampire take shape before learning to control the beast.
4. A good showdown. Eclipse robbed us of the vampire battle. I didn't care if it was the Volturi coming after Bella or the werewolves after Edward. I just wanted a good fight (from all the buildup to one) and I wanted people to die (because a battle without death isn't realistic), maybe even Jacob sacrificing for Bella. Isn't killing the vein of their existence? I expected some death.
But alas that is not the story. I think I may have to start denying I've ever read the Twilight saga. I was going to buy the boxed set if for nothing else for a pretty addition to my bookshelf, but now I'm truly embarrassed to have read the series.
The rest of my review has spoilers.
(view spoiler)[I'm calling wolf. This is not Jacob's story. This is Bella and Edward's story and Jacob is a distraction. I'm sorry that you like him too much to hurt him, but that doesn't mean you have to ruin the story for him, much less give him half the book. Making Bella still love him hurts them all, makes her self-centered, and Edward seem an indulgent parent with a whiny brat he can't say no to. It diminishes their love to volley back and forth. Everyone I love together? I don't buy it. Bella said goodbye to Jacob in Eclipse; leave it at that. Sacrifice for Edward. That's love.
Bella's treatment of Edward (and Jacob) is only as infuriating as his indulgence of it. His idea for resolution of her nudger (gag!) is ghastly. For a second I thought Meyer was going to go down that road and I was sickened. How in anyone's mind is offering your wife up to another man shows undying love is beyond me. It is sick and wrong. And how is insemination gross or worse that pimping her out? How can Bella never consider Edward's worry for her? She knows how she'd feel if he died. Bella seemed more like Wanda in The Host: trying to portray her as too kind which is just blindly selfish. She should have written The Host after and not confused the stories or writing style. The characters have wandered so far from their original shells that I couldn't branch this story to the magic of Twilight. Where were Edward and Bella? And the rest of the Cullens?
The way Meyer transfers Jacob from one obsession to another while not extreme to be pedophile is still creepy, much worse considering Jacob's comment about seeing Bella naked or that Bella's eyes caused the imprint. This is not a southern joke where your father is your uncle and your grandpa too. It doesn't excuse Bella's unhealthy possession of him and it doesn't smooth over the hatred with Edward. My brother, my son? Gag. His intrusion in the happy family of three was beyond grating. He doesn't get a say in how that child is raised. And is Renesmee seriously supposed to grow up and love a guy who raised her? That's disturbing. Why couldn't Jacob and Leah be happy together instead of Meyer making all of her relationships the older man with a young girl? The story was going that way, but Meyer had reserved this sick end for Jacob she found romantic so she forced it onto the story. Werewolf imprint on vampire hybrid? That makes no sense, especially after Leah's discussion about imprinting on the best mate to keep the race alive.
As much as I didn't like the extent Jacob was in the book, the other vampires were more disappointing. All the old albeit shallow side characters were replaced with a freak show. I thought this was a book about vampires not superheros? The abundant "rare" gifts got more ridiculous from one to the next--at least the original gifts connected to human traits. And the flaws. Alice's ineptitude at her visions was not consistent. Bella? Willpower? Bella's "holes" didn't make sense. How could Jasper affect her if she's that strong? Why couldn't Edward hear her inside her bubble? Everything about all these extra vampires was just wrong. Hundreds of vampires on a feeding frenzy without the Volturi reducing numbers didn't make sense. She should have stuck to developing the Cullens. And Bella. The second half was so out of character I couldn't take that disjointed leap with her.
I was so disappointed with the lengthy Volturi scene, the only thing with any hope of excitement that only built and tiringly built and then fizzled. These were the only vampires sold as creepy monsters and while their mafia-type support didn't make sense, I still expected them to act out the role. They didn't deliver. The story was so far gone by that point, I half expected the spawn of Satan (and by that I mean Renesmee) to destroy the Volturi alone. It seemed more "The Incredibles" than Bella and Edward at that point so why not a Jack-Jack ending? It didn't resolve anything and only put them in graver danger but she still shoved a happily ever after down our throats.
Vampires (dead humans with extra chromosomes?) don't have blood; they don't drink, pee, sweat, or have liquid in their bodies. Beyond the complications of sex for those reasons (which I wouldn't have questioned if that's as far as it went) or the likelihood of Rosemary's baby, don't turn the monster into an angel more werewolf than vampire. It's a confusing stretch. You know in soap operas where babies get in the way of the storyline so they magically grow up so the parents don't have to deal with childhood? Sacrifice is what gives you undying love for children; they are not convenient plot ideas. Nothing about that child made sense and I thought Nessie, considering its monster ties, was a vast improvement on a ridiculous name. And Edward Jacob for a boy is not sweet. It's obscenely selfish.
The point at which I started hating this book was when Bella didn't even act like a vampire. Not being a newborn vampire is not a gift, particularly for a vampire who needs a myriad of other gifts to save the story. It's an excuse to not have your characters suffer. But instead of making characters stronger, it weakens them. It robs them. It robs us of a good story. You can't soften that blow. Hiding the pain of the bite from Edward robbed him of a chance for compassion--something dependent Bella would not do. Turning to the person you love most in your worst hour is love, is what strengthens relationships. And how is Bella's human uterus so strong that only a vampire could cut through it with his teeth? That was about the biggest joke in the book.
Being a "soulless" newborn vampire isn't all Meyer cracked it up to be. If it were, they never would have let a strong newborn go hunting with only one guardian. Since Bella was so easily distracted from a thirst that didn't seem all that powerful, there should have been some good loving in that forest. Having the thirst that drives the series not phase her, diminishes its power and intrigue for all vampires, all the way back to Twilight. Being a vampire isn't torture; it's fun. I want to be a superhero vampire.
Sacrifice is what Bella knew she was undertaking when she picked Edward. But she gave up nothing. Everything is twisted for the sake of convenience: children, newborn desire, imprinting, human family, death, special gifts, a cast of new vampires, everything. Would a cop who detaches his daughter's battery so she doesn't sneak out plead "don't ask, don't tell" with the scary supernatural threatening his community and daughter? The only reason this bogus aspect is even in the story is because Meyer couldn't bare for Bella to lose anything. But if Edward, Bella, and Jacob are unrecognizable characters, why not Charlie? And if Charlie gets pulled into the story why not her mother? I'm sure Meyer could have come with an implausible excuse for her too.
Meyer tried to add plot twists, but couldn't commit to their consequences. With all the conflict removed for Bella, there is no drama so Meyer tries to create it with ill-placed childish mood swings. There are no monsters in the book. Vampires are sparkly happy supermodels. Werewolves are snuggly tame pets. Even the werewolf-vampire antagonism seems to have dissipated. The head-butting between Rosalie and Jacob seems more personality conflict than the innate drive to destroy each other. They all want to sit around the campfire and sing. Couldn't at least some Volturi sinister be burning in that fire? (hide spoiler)]
There is more to complain about, but I am out of room. In a nutshell: part one: strange, part two: disgusting, part three: dull. I'm appalled it has more stars than New Moon. I guess some girls care more about a happy story than a good one. I didn't buy the book and I still want my money back. I feel robbed. Not having the guts to finish what you started not only ruins this book, but previous installments too. I will give her this: she used a dictionary to add a few big words and she kept it clean. But I can't read her books anymore. And I wish I could wash this one out of system. The saga had such potential and she killed it.(less)
You can't fal...more I was so disenchanted with Eclipse I wasn't excited for this read, but I had to know how it ends. I held off judgment in hopes that the conclusion would redeem the series. The verdict? Hard-to-swallow soap opera. A car crash you can't stop staring at in hopes that something salvageable comes out of the wreckage. But nothing does. So bad I started taking notes on all the plot holes because I couldn't keep track. What happened to the story that captured the hearts of girls everywhere?
You can't fall in love with your characters so much you save them from the dilemma you created: the impossibilities of vampire and human love, the instinctual need to destroy between vampires and werewolves, the girl who has to choose between two boys in opposing worlds, the boy who gets left out, the girl who has to make massive sacrifices for her choice. You can't save them from the plot by taking it all back and saying "never mind the rules I created, you can all have it all without giving anything up for it." When you do that, you take an exciting premise, take all the fire and excitement out, and ruin the story. As an author, you have a responsibility to your story, your characters, your fans, even yourself as a creator, to let the story be.
I recommend you write your own ending. Or better yet (since I'm not really a fan of fan fiction), take your book back and get your money back. If everyone does, maybe Meyer will pretend it was a big joke and rewrite a plausible ending to the saga. Maybe this time her editor (and copy editor) will actually read it. By the double-digit errors I found not even looking I doubt he/she did.
What I expected from this story:
1. The big dilemma. In Eclipse Meyer finally showed the downfall of vampire life. Bella has to give up her family, the potential of her own family, her friendship with Jacob, and the ease of human life out in the open. Most importantly she takes on the internal moral struggle of an instinct to kill, of being a monster. This is serious sacrifice and I wanted to see some soul searching, some grieving, some preparation for death from Bella.
2. Vampire sex. Vampire trying not to kill human sex. Newborn vampire with unquenchable passion sex. No harlequin romance graphic, but like Twilight explored kissing, exploring how they could possibly do that.
3. One scary newborn vampire. Murderous screaming during the transition after a bite from Edward to save her from death. The rage, the passion, the strength, and most importantly the thirst, the unquenchable thirst, that overpowers all that is human. I wanted to see Bella going after a human, preferably someone she knows, and have to be restrained. I wanted to see the true monster that is vampire take shape before learning to control the beast.
4. A good showdown. Eclipse robbed us of the vampire battle. I didn't care if it was the Volturi coming after Bella or the werewolves after Edward. I just wanted a good fight (from all the buildup to one) and I wanted people to die (because a battle without death isn't realistic), maybe even Jacob sacrificing for Bella. Isn't killing the vein of their existence? I expected some death.
But alas that is not the story. I think I may have to start denying I've ever read the Twilight saga. I was going to buy the boxed set if for nothing else for a pretty addition to my bookshelf, but now I'm truly embarrassed to have read the series.
The rest of my review has spoilers.
(view spoiler)[I'm calling wolf. This is not Jacob's story. This is Bella and Edward's story and Jacob is a distraction. I'm sorry that you like him too much to hurt him, but that doesn't mean you have to ruin the story for him, much less give him half the book. Making Bella still love him hurts them all, makes her self-centered, and Edward seem an indulgent parent with a whiny brat he can't say no to. It diminishes their love to volley back and forth. Everyone I love together? I don't buy it. Bella said goodbye to Jacob in Eclipse; leave it at that. Sacrifice for Edward. That's love.
Bella's treatment of Edward (and Jacob) is only as infuriating as his indulgence of it. His idea for resolution of her nudger (gag!) is ghastly. For a second I thought Meyer was going to go down that road and I was sickened. How in anyone's mind is offering your wife up to another man shows undying love is beyond me. It is sick and wrong. And how is insemination gross or worse that pimping her out? How can Bella never consider Edward's worry for her? She knows how she'd feel if he died. Bella seemed more like Wanda in The Host: trying to portray her as too kind which is just blindly selfish. She should have written The Host after and not confused the stories or writing style. The characters have wandered so far from their original shells that I couldn't branch this story to the magic of Twilight. Where were Edward and Bella? And the rest of the Cullens?
The way Meyer transfers Jacob from one obsession to another while not extreme to be pedophile is still creepy, much worse considering Jacob's comment about seeing Bella naked or that Bella's eyes caused the imprint. This is not a southern joke where your father is your uncle and your grandpa too. It doesn't excuse Bella's unhealthy possession of him and it doesn't smooth over the hatred with Edward. My brother, my son? Gag. His intrusion in the happy family of three was beyond grating. He doesn't get a say in how that child is raised. And is Renesmee seriously supposed to grow up and love a guy who raised her? That's disturbing. Why couldn't Jacob and Leah be happy together instead of Meyer making all of her relationships the older man with a young girl? The story was going that way, but Meyer had reserved this sick end for Jacob she found romantic so she forced it onto the story. Werewolf imprint on vampire hybrid? That makes no sense, especially after Leah's discussion about imprinting on the best mate to keep the race alive.
As much as I didn't like the extent Jacob was in the book, the other vampires were more disappointing. All the old albeit shallow side characters were replaced with a freak show. I thought this was a book about vampires not superheros? The abundant "rare" gifts got more ridiculous from one to the next--at least the original gifts connected to human traits. And the flaws. Alice's ineptitude at her visions was not consistent. Bella? Willpower? Bella's "holes" didn't make sense. How could Jasper affect her if she's that strong? Why couldn't Edward hear her inside her bubble? Everything about all these extra vampires was just wrong. Hundreds of vampires on a feeding frenzy without the Volturi reducing numbers didn't make sense. She should have stuck to developing the Cullens. And Bella. The second half was so out of character I couldn't take that disjointed leap with her.
I was so disappointed with the lengthy Volturi scene, the only thing with any hope of excitement that only built and tiringly built and then fizzled. These were the only vampires sold as creepy monsters and while their mafia-type support didn't make sense, I still expected them to act out the role. They didn't deliver. The story was so far gone by that point, I half expected the spawn of Satan (and by that I mean Renesmee) to destroy the Volturi alone. It seemed more "The Incredibles" than Bella and Edward at that point so why not a Jack-Jack ending? It didn't resolve anything and only put them in graver danger but she still shoved a happily ever after down our throats.
Vampires (dead humans with extra chromosomes?) don't have blood; they don't drink, pee, sweat, or have liquid in their bodies. Beyond the complications of sex for those reasons (which I wouldn't have questioned if that's as far as it went) or the likelihood of Rosemary's baby, don't turn the monster into an angel more werewolf than vampire. It's a confusing stretch. You know in soap operas where babies get in the way of the storyline so they magically grow up so the parents don't have to deal with childhood? Sacrifice is what gives you undying love for children; they are not convenient plot ideas. Nothing about that child made sense and I thought Nessie, considering its monster ties, was a vast improvement on a ridiculous name. And Edward Jacob for a boy is not sweet. It's obscenely selfish.
The point at which I started hating this book was when Bella didn't even act like a vampire. Not being a newborn vampire is not a gift, particularly for a vampire who needs a myriad of other gifts to save the story. It's an excuse to not have your characters suffer. But instead of making characters stronger, it weakens them. It robs them. It robs us of a good story. You can't soften that blow. Hiding the pain of the bite from Edward robbed him of a chance for compassion--something dependent Bella would not do. Turning to the person you love most in your worst hour is love, is what strengthens relationships. And how is Bella's human uterus so strong that only a vampire could cut through it with his teeth? That was about the biggest joke in the book.
Being a "soulless" newborn vampire isn't all Meyer cracked it up to be. If it were, they never would have let a strong newborn go hunting with only one guardian. Since Bella was so easily distracted from a thirst that didn't seem all that powerful, there should have been some good loving in that forest. Having the thirst that drives the series not phase her, diminishes its power and intrigue for all vampires, all the way back to Twilight. Being a vampire isn't torture; it's fun. I want to be a superhero vampire.
Sacrifice is what Bella knew she was undertaking when she picked Edward. But she gave up nothing. Everything is twisted for the sake of convenience: children, newborn desire, imprinting, human family, death, special gifts, a cast of new vampires, everything. Would a cop who detaches his daughter's battery so she doesn't sneak out plead "don't ask, don't tell" with the scary supernatural threatening his community and daughter? The only reason this bogus aspect is even in the story is because Meyer couldn't bare for Bella to lose anything. But if Edward, Bella, and Jacob are unrecognizable characters, why not Charlie? And if Charlie gets pulled into the story why not her mother? I'm sure Meyer could have come with an implausible excuse for her too.
Meyer tried to add plot twists, but couldn't commit to their consequences. With all the conflict removed for Bella, there is no drama so Meyer tries to create it with ill-placed childish mood swings. There are no monsters in the book. Vampires are sparkly happy supermodels. Werewolves are snuggly tame pets. Even the werewolf-vampire antagonism seems to have dissipated. The head-butting between Rosalie and Jacob seems more personality conflict than the innate drive to destroy each other. They all want to sit around the campfire and sing. Couldn't at least some Volturi sinister be burning in that fire? (hide spoiler)]
There is more to complain about, but I am out of room. In a nutshell: part one: strange, part two: disgusting, part three: dull. I'm appalled it has more stars than New Moon. I guess some girls care more about a happy story than a good one. I didn't buy the book and I still want my money back. I feel robbed. Not having the guts to finish what you started not only ruins this book, but previous installments too. I will give her this: she used a dictionary to add a few big words and she kept it clean. But I can't read her books anymore. And I wish I could wash this one out of system. The saga had such potential and she killed it.(less)
357 likes · like · see review
Pranya Felton
Thank you for putting into words what I've been trying to frame all the while. Excellent, excellent review. Hit the nail right on the head. :D
Jan 11, 2013 06:06am
Jan 11, 2013 06:06am
Annalisa
Kari wrote: "I wouldn't say she kept it clean...She turned two of her wolf-boys into pedophiles."
:).
Angeline, I expected Eclipse to be the conclusion...more Kari wrote: "I wouldn't say she kept it clean...She turned two of her wolf-boys into pedophiles."
:).
Angeline, I expected Eclipse to be the conclusion and was excited to read it, but was highly disappointed that not only was that book lacking (no battle, her relationship with Jacob took away from her relationship with Edward, the tent scene was embarrassing wish fulfillment, etc) but also that it was just a big stall. I'd hoped Breaking Dawn would end the series with a bang (had high expectations after Deathly Hallows), but it just pushed the story off a cliff and took away any of its redeeming qualities.
Thank you, Pranya. I was passionately disappointed enough to put it all down :).(less)
Jan 12, 2013 03:08pm
:).
Angeline, I expected Eclipse to be the conclusion...more Kari wrote: "I wouldn't say she kept it clean...She turned two of her wolf-boys into pedophiles."
:).
Angeline, I expected Eclipse to be the conclusion and was excited to read it, but was highly disappointed that not only was that book lacking (no battle, her relationship with Jacob took away from her relationship with Edward, the tent scene was embarrassing wish fulfillment, etc) but also that it was just a big stall. I'd hoped Breaking Dawn would end the series with a bang (had high expectations after Deathly Hallows), but it just pushed the story off a cliff and took away any of its redeeming qualities.
Thank you, Pranya. I was passionately disappointed enough to put it all down :).(less)
Jan 12, 2013 03:08pm
Stephenie Meyer is really starting to piss me off. I'm actually ANGRY at her. Why? Because she's the great untapped potential of our time. She was born with such an innate gift for storytelling. It's uncanny. I mean, as a storyteller, she's one of those six-out-of-five-stars kind of talents. But as long as her writing clocks in at the zero mark, she'll never reach greatness. HER INTERMITTENT GENIUS IS KILLING ME!!! I really love her stories--a fact which embarrasses me... and it doesn't have to!...more
Stephenie Meyer is really starting to piss me off. I'm actually ANGRY at her. Why? Because she's the great untapped potential of our time. She was born with such an innate gift for storytelling. It's uncanny. I mean, as a storyteller, she's one of those six-out-of-five-stars kind of talents. But as long as her writing clocks in at the zero mark, she'll never reach greatness. HER INTERMITTENT GENIUS IS KILLING ME!!! I really love her stories--a fact which embarrasses me... and it doesn't have to! I could be PROUD of the fact that I love her, if only... Actually, I'm plagued by a long list of "if onlys" as I read her novels. Here are a few:
IF ONLY SHE COULD SERVE THE MAIN DISH WITHOUT A SIDE OF CORNBREAD SMOTHERED IN CHEESE SAUCE. Actually, to say her writing is corny or cheesy doesn't even touch it. Some of Edward's dialogue actually gets the bile rising in my throat. Literally. Maybe you guys go for that kind of stuff, but it makes me want to scream, "Yeah right!" These poor teens addicted to Edward are destined to increase our future divorce rate a hundred fold. Why does that drive me crazy? Because of Meyer's intermittent genius. Every thirty pages or so, she will write a truly touching moment full of honesty and warmth--and absolutely NO CHEESE--and I think to her, "See, Steph! You can do it! Why include all this crap in between???" (I forgot to mention that I sometimes give her pep talks in my head, huh... It's a little weird, but go with it.)
IF ONLY SHE DIDN'T HAVE THAT PER-PAGE CLICHE QUOTA. I'm sincerely convinced she has to include a minimum of five cliches per page or her editors won't publish her. There's no other excuse for it! Aren't you guys tired of things happening as quick as lightening, or reading the way the protagonist's heart breaks into a million pieces, etc.??? I AM! By the time Stephenie wrote that Bella literally began to "see red" when she was angry, I wanted to scream at her, "NO!!! Don't make her see red when she's angry, like she's Sponge Bob or something!!! Why all these cliches??? You obviously have a decent vocabulary and a wonderful ability to craft words, why write the exact same phrases we hear everyday in soap operas??? Why, dear Stephenie, why???" It makes me... (so mad I could spit--or insert any other hackneyed phrase of your own choosing). It's like she doesn't actually write her own sentences. She just cuts and pastes from the worst lines in history. SAVE ME!!!!
IF ONLY I COULDN'T SEE WHAT WAS COMING AS CLEARLY AS ALICE CAN. The plot is so predictable, I feel like I've already written it in my mind. Don't you? Maybe it's just me, but being taken by surprise is one of my greatest thrills as a reader, and in the thousands of Stephenie Meyer pages I have read, it happened only ONCE (page 360 of Breaking Dawn... didn't see THAT one coming and it knocked me flat on my unsuspecting butt... easily the best moment in the whole series). That is positively INEXCUSABLE. Didn't Meyer's beginning writing class instructor tell her to make the list of possible things that could happen and go with the most INTERESTING. He must have said PREDICTABLE that day in his lecture, and that's how she got confused.
IF ONLY ALL HER CHARACTERS WEREN'T MORMON. Obviously Bella, Edward, Jacob and the others aren't Mormon. But she wrote them that way. (Lest someone be offended, let me clarify that *I* am Mormon). They do not talk like real people in the real world. Sorry. They talk like Mormons (with the occasional "damn" thrown in, proving she did make SOME attempt at fighting her natural Mormonness). I'm not saying they need to swear more... I just haven't heard as many euphemistic substitutions since I watched an episode of the classic Batman TV series as a kid. Holy cow! Geez! Golly! It's distractingly corny. She talks like... ME! A Mormon! Each time I turned the page, I half expected Bella to exclaim, "Oh my heck!"
IF ONLY STEPHENIE WOULD EDIT. I'm not talking about the approximately 500 typos that caused me to re-read entire paragraphs in order to understand what was going on (dear fancy publishing company, can't you afford just three anal readers like me to proofread for you???)... I'm talking about WRITER'S editing. It's like Stephenie sits down, turns out about forty pages a day and never looks at them again. Didn't she learn to go back over the writing? To circle the cliches and to-be verbs? To iron out the script so it flowed? To truly CRAFT her writing, instead of just settling for whatever popped into her head first??? (which happens to be brilliant, just not POLISHED). SHE'S KILLING ME!!!
Once again, why is she killing me? Intermittent genius. It's not that she always sucks. I'll read some amazing paragraph and talk to Stephenie again in my head. "Why? Why do you do this to me? You obviously CAN write. SO WHY DON'T YOU????" I love her sense of pacing. I love the way she captures the electricity of crucial moments. Her dialogue is dazzling. There are so many moments of intermittent genius. If she could only be consistently, ridiculously awful. Then I just wouldn't read her.
Aren't you being too hard on her, Meg? YES!!! Yes I am! That's what makes me the angriest of all. I'm reminding myself of this judge I had once in a piano competition. I finished my twenty page solo and he said, "That was very good..." then he leaned forward menacingly and added, "Now why wasn't it PERFECT?" I thought to myself, "Um... because I'M not perfect, maybe..." Then he added, "The first page was perfect. Why wasn't the REST of it perfect?" He then concluded that I must have been lazy, which was far from the truth. I'd almost literally worked my fingers to the bone (see, if I were proofreading my novel right now and read that cliche, I would have replaced it at this point) preparing for the competition.
Am I asking Stephenie to be perfect? NO!!! Just worthy of her own talent! It all came to her too easily. That's the problem. She even admits it herself. She just sat down at a keyboard one day, decided she was going to be a novelist, started writing, then immediately found an editor (who obviously sucks) and a publisher. Instant success! There's a reason why writers usually have to work for it! IT MAKES THEM BETTER AT WHAT THEY DO.
I still haven't read "Host." Honestly, I'm afraid I'll like it. Then I'm afraid that I'll rip out each page one by one in maddening frustration. This is my future Stephenie Meyer plan. Maybe someday, when I stop "seeing red" over reading this last evidence of her wasted potential, I'll pick up another of her books. And I'll read it obsessively in two days, like I always do, because she's a genius. BUT I'LL EXPECT MORE OF HER. We ALL should. And if she doesn't try harder... SOON... I'll stop reading. Because it's just too painful.(less)
IF ONLY SHE COULD SERVE THE MAIN DISH WITHOUT A SIDE OF CORNBREAD SMOTHERED IN CHEESE SAUCE. Actually, to say her writing is corny or cheesy doesn't even touch it. Some of Edward's dialogue actually gets the bile rising in my throat. Literally. Maybe you guys go for that kind of stuff, but it makes me want to scream, "Yeah right!" These poor teens addicted to Edward are destined to increase our future divorce rate a hundred fold. Why does that drive me crazy? Because of Meyer's intermittent genius. Every thirty pages or so, she will write a truly touching moment full of honesty and warmth--and absolutely NO CHEESE--and I think to her, "See, Steph! You can do it! Why include all this crap in between???" (I forgot to mention that I sometimes give her pep talks in my head, huh... It's a little weird, but go with it.)
IF ONLY SHE DIDN'T HAVE THAT PER-PAGE CLICHE QUOTA. I'm sincerely convinced she has to include a minimum of five cliches per page or her editors won't publish her. There's no other excuse for it! Aren't you guys tired of things happening as quick as lightening, or reading the way the protagonist's heart breaks into a million pieces, etc.??? I AM! By the time Stephenie wrote that Bella literally began to "see red" when she was angry, I wanted to scream at her, "NO!!! Don't make her see red when she's angry, like she's Sponge Bob or something!!! Why all these cliches??? You obviously have a decent vocabulary and a wonderful ability to craft words, why write the exact same phrases we hear everyday in soap operas??? Why, dear Stephenie, why???" It makes me... (so mad I could spit--or insert any other hackneyed phrase of your own choosing). It's like she doesn't actually write her own sentences. She just cuts and pastes from the worst lines in history. SAVE ME!!!!
IF ONLY I COULDN'T SEE WHAT WAS COMING AS CLEARLY AS ALICE CAN. The plot is so predictable, I feel like I've already written it in my mind. Don't you? Maybe it's just me, but being taken by surprise is one of my greatest thrills as a reader, and in the thousands of Stephenie Meyer pages I have read, it happened only ONCE (page 360 of Breaking Dawn... didn't see THAT one coming and it knocked me flat on my unsuspecting butt... easily the best moment in the whole series). That is positively INEXCUSABLE. Didn't Meyer's beginning writing class instructor tell her to make the list of possible things that could happen and go with the most INTERESTING. He must have said PREDICTABLE that day in his lecture, and that's how she got confused.
IF ONLY ALL HER CHARACTERS WEREN'T MORMON. Obviously Bella, Edward, Jacob and the others aren't Mormon. But she wrote them that way. (Lest someone be offended, let me clarify that *I* am Mormon). They do not talk like real people in the real world. Sorry. They talk like Mormons (with the occasional "damn" thrown in, proving she did make SOME attempt at fighting her natural Mormonness). I'm not saying they need to swear more... I just haven't heard as many euphemistic substitutions since I watched an episode of the classic Batman TV series as a kid. Holy cow! Geez! Golly! It's distractingly corny. She talks like... ME! A Mormon! Each time I turned the page, I half expected Bella to exclaim, "Oh my heck!"
IF ONLY STEPHENIE WOULD EDIT. I'm not talking about the approximately 500 typos that caused me to re-read entire paragraphs in order to understand what was going on (dear fancy publishing company, can't you afford just three anal readers like me to proofread for you???)... I'm talking about WRITER'S editing. It's like Stephenie sits down, turns out about forty pages a day and never looks at them again. Didn't she learn to go back over the writing? To circle the cliches and to-be verbs? To iron out the script so it flowed? To truly CRAFT her writing, instead of just settling for whatever popped into her head first??? (which happens to be brilliant, just not POLISHED). SHE'S KILLING ME!!!
Once again, why is she killing me? Intermittent genius. It's not that she always sucks. I'll read some amazing paragraph and talk to Stephenie again in my head. "Why? Why do you do this to me? You obviously CAN write. SO WHY DON'T YOU????" I love her sense of pacing. I love the way she captures the electricity of crucial moments. Her dialogue is dazzling. There are so many moments of intermittent genius. If she could only be consistently, ridiculously awful. Then I just wouldn't read her.
Aren't you being too hard on her, Meg? YES!!! Yes I am! That's what makes me the angriest of all. I'm reminding myself of this judge I had once in a piano competition. I finished my twenty page solo and he said, "That was very good..." then he leaned forward menacingly and added, "Now why wasn't it PERFECT?" I thought to myself, "Um... because I'M not perfect, maybe..." Then he added, "The first page was perfect. Why wasn't the REST of it perfect?" He then concluded that I must have been lazy, which was far from the truth. I'd almost literally worked my fingers to the bone (see, if I were proofreading my novel right now and read that cliche, I would have replaced it at this point) preparing for the competition.
Am I asking Stephenie to be perfect? NO!!! Just worthy of her own talent! It all came to her too easily. That's the problem. She even admits it herself. She just sat down at a keyboard one day, decided she was going to be a novelist, started writing, then immediately found an editor (who obviously sucks) and a publisher. Instant success! There's a reason why writers usually have to work for it! IT MAKES THEM BETTER AT WHAT THEY DO.
I still haven't read "Host." Honestly, I'm afraid I'll like it. Then I'm afraid that I'll rip out each page one by one in maddening frustration. This is my future Stephenie Meyer plan. Maybe someday, when I stop "seeing red" over reading this last evidence of her wasted potential, I'll pick up another of her books. And I'll read it obsessively in two days, like I always do, because she's a genius. BUT I'LL EXPECT MORE OF HER. We ALL should. And if she doesn't try harder... SOON... I'll stop reading. Because it's just too painful.(less)
738 likes · like · see review
Stephen
There are a load of comments here and i couldn't be bothered looking through them to see if anyone else has already mentioned it. I think you will lik...more
There are a load of comments here and i couldn't be bothered looking through them to see if anyone else has already mentioned it. I think you will like the host, its a really good story, still a bit cheesy and stuff but i thought it was good. The beginning was hard to get through though. Once it gets into it its worth it.(less)
Feb 05, 2013 02:29am
Feb 05, 2013 02:29am
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
[pardon any grammatical/spelling errors, I'm not reading this over again--I didn't get much sleep obviously:]
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book that comes out in the series having to be better than the last. Of course that is always a possibility for stories such as Harry Potter, where the plot is laced through all of the books and leads to an ultimate climax and resolution in the final book. S...more [pardon any grammatical/spelling errors, I'm not reading this over again--I didn't get much sleep obviously:]
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book that comes out in the series having to be better than the last. Of course that is always a possibility for stories such as Harry Potter, where the plot is laced through all of the books and leads to an ultimate climax and resolution in the final book. Stephenie Meyer did not follow this example in any way, shape, or form.
Instead of possibly creating an internal plot that would follow the entire series, every book has...well, I cannot justify a plot in any of the books, save the first one (that was in the last 100 pages of the book), so I'll try to skim sweetly over this. For her last attempt, strike 4 on my count, Meyer rides this train till there are no more tracks; taking the train, and all of it's passengers on a bumpy, uncomfortable, and unforgivable journey no one had prepared for.
Bella's half-breed child shouldn't even exist, given Meyer's specific "VAMPIRES CANNOT HAVE CHILDREN", so of course she gives a pathetic, if not confusing, explanation to how Edward gets Bella pregnant. The child's name itself is atrocious; I honestly hope no one loves this series enough to name their own child that, out of their "love for Stephenie Meyer."
Let's remember what I said before: there is not a sustaining plot throughout these books, besides the fact that Bella wants to become a vampire; but even that is stretching it. So when Bella becomes pregnant, it's almost as if Meyer suddenly thought, "PLOT!" and took off at the speed of light in a direction that flabbergasted me. Has she even mentioned children in this entire book series? Besides the fact that little mutant Nessie takes the entire stage, Bella's giving birth to a mutant that should not exist (X-Men anyone?) seems to be the only thing that drives this story forward. Because otherwise, the story would have ended. Bella got married, Bella somehow someway got pregnant, Bella had a half-breed baby, Bella becomes a vampire, Jacob creepily imprints on said baby, and everyone lives freakishly happily ever after.
I shouldn't have to describe how horrific it is that the entire 800-pages of the final novel is about a baby. Bella seemed to move to Forks and somehow grow up in a year, getting married and having a baby, and living for forever with her ridiculously good-looking husband. I understand that Bella made the choice for herself, doesn't mean I have to think it was a good one. Or a good example for young girls to follow. I'm not going to step up on the soap box and preach about how many horrible morals this gives to girl's of today's generation (after feminism has fought to get us this far) because if they haven't read a cheap romance novel yet, they certainly will. Guys looking to date girls of that generation should beware however. If you don't sparkle in the sun, devote every step you take and every move you make to her, and like to watch her sleep, you might not have much of a chance.
But, back to the story, cough, I mean lack thereof. The Volturi coming in deemed itself, once again, random and overreaching for Meyer. As if she just wanted them to show up and have an epic battle, but it wasn't really epic and it didn't serve much of a point. However, if I was a 1000-year-old vampire, I'm sure I'd be bored enough to care about someone as trivial as Bella Swan too.
1/3 of the novel is in Jacob's perspective, and to be honest, that was the one part I enjoyed (somewhat). Only because I think Jacob was Meyer's best character. He shall forever be known as the character with a personality. However, as Meyer had introduced me to Jacob, and gave me reason to like him, she also had the power to do the opposite. Thank you, Stephenie Meyer for ruining one of the only realistic characters you created. *two thumbs way down* Not only did Jacob CREEP me out, he was so completely overbearing and whiny, I couldn't wait to get back to Bella, the whining queen! His imprinting on little Nessie just put the icing on the shit-cake I had been eating for the past 400 pages. I had assumed we went passed the pedophilia part with Quil, and come on, he imprinted on EDWARD AND BELLA'S BABY? Why couldn't he have imprinted on a 35-year-old alcoholic with an abusive husband and Meyer could give someone who needs saving a fighting chance by someone with super powers.
By this point, I was going to take an example from New Moon and jump off a cliff just to save myself from the rest of the book.
But I didn't, and I should have.
The rest of the book was almost as boring and laughable as the first half, but at least the first half had (gasp) fade-to-black sensual scenes.
As many people have been saying, this book is exactly like 1,000 stories on FanFiction.net--and if I can give you any advice, find a story on there and it might be a lot better than reading this.
And it would probably be 700 pages less.(less)
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book that comes out in the series having to be better than the last. Of course that is always a possibility for stories such as Harry Potter, where the plot is laced through all of the books and leads to an ultimate climax and resolution in the final book. S...more [pardon any grammatical/spelling errors, I'm not reading this over again--I didn't get much sleep obviously:]
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book that comes out in the series having to be better than the last. Of course that is always a possibility for stories such as Harry Potter, where the plot is laced through all of the books and leads to an ultimate climax and resolution in the final book. Stephenie Meyer did not follow this example in any way, shape, or form.
Instead of possibly creating an internal plot that would follow the entire series, every book has...well, I cannot justify a plot in any of the books, save the first one (that was in the last 100 pages of the book), so I'll try to skim sweetly over this. For her last attempt, strike 4 on my count, Meyer rides this train till there are no more tracks; taking the train, and all of it's passengers on a bumpy, uncomfortable, and unforgivable journey no one had prepared for.
Bella's half-breed child shouldn't even exist, given Meyer's specific "VAMPIRES CANNOT HAVE CHILDREN", so of course she gives a pathetic, if not confusing, explanation to how Edward gets Bella pregnant. The child's name itself is atrocious; I honestly hope no one loves this series enough to name their own child that, out of their "love for Stephenie Meyer."
Let's remember what I said before: there is not a sustaining plot throughout these books, besides the fact that Bella wants to become a vampire; but even that is stretching it. So when Bella becomes pregnant, it's almost as if Meyer suddenly thought, "PLOT!" and took off at the speed of light in a direction that flabbergasted me. Has she even mentioned children in this entire book series? Besides the fact that little mutant Nessie takes the entire stage, Bella's giving birth to a mutant that should not exist (X-Men anyone?) seems to be the only thing that drives this story forward. Because otherwise, the story would have ended. Bella got married, Bella somehow someway got pregnant, Bella had a half-breed baby, Bella becomes a vampire, Jacob creepily imprints on said baby, and everyone lives freakishly happily ever after.
I shouldn't have to describe how horrific it is that the entire 800-pages of the final novel is about a baby. Bella seemed to move to Forks and somehow grow up in a year, getting married and having a baby, and living for forever with her ridiculously good-looking husband. I understand that Bella made the choice for herself, doesn't mean I have to think it was a good one. Or a good example for young girls to follow. I'm not going to step up on the soap box and preach about how many horrible morals this gives to girl's of today's generation (after feminism has fought to get us this far) because if they haven't read a cheap romance novel yet, they certainly will. Guys looking to date girls of that generation should beware however. If you don't sparkle in the sun, devote every step you take and every move you make to her, and like to watch her sleep, you might not have much of a chance.
But, back to the story, cough, I mean lack thereof. The Volturi coming in deemed itself, once again, random and overreaching for Meyer. As if she just wanted them to show up and have an epic battle, but it wasn't really epic and it didn't serve much of a point. However, if I was a 1000-year-old vampire, I'm sure I'd be bored enough to care about someone as trivial as Bella Swan too.
1/3 of the novel is in Jacob's perspective, and to be honest, that was the one part I enjoyed (somewhat). Only because I think Jacob was Meyer's best character. He shall forever be known as the character with a personality. However, as Meyer had introduced me to Jacob, and gave me reason to like him, she also had the power to do the opposite. Thank you, Stephenie Meyer for ruining one of the only realistic characters you created. *two thumbs way down* Not only did Jacob CREEP me out, he was so completely overbearing and whiny, I couldn't wait to get back to Bella, the whining queen! His imprinting on little Nessie just put the icing on the shit-cake I had been eating for the past 400 pages. I had assumed we went passed the pedophilia part with Quil, and come on, he imprinted on EDWARD AND BELLA'S BABY? Why couldn't he have imprinted on a 35-year-old alcoholic with an abusive husband and Meyer could give someone who needs saving a fighting chance by someone with super powers.
By this point, I was going to take an example from New Moon and jump off a cliff just to save myself from the rest of the book.
But I didn't, and I should have.
The rest of the book was almost as boring and laughable as the first half, but at least the first half had (gasp) fade-to-black sensual scenes.
As many people have been saying, this book is exactly like 1,000 stories on FanFiction.net--and if I can give you any advice, find a story on there and it might be a lot better than reading this.
And it would probably be 700 pages less.(less)
Jul 24, 2010
Janae
rated it
5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Die-Hard Twilight Fans, not appropriate for young teens.
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Where do I begin? I LOVED this book. It was even better than I even imagined. So many surprises! I picked mine up at midnight when it was released and could hardly put it down.
So first off...the wedding was beautiful. The honeymoon was even better. Stephenie Meyer did an amazing job of writing a "tasteful" honeymoon scene. It wasn't dirty at all. It was beautiful. You knew they were able to have sex and that there was a definate strong "intensity" during these moments but she didn't go into too...more Where do I begin? I LOVED this book. It was even better than I even imagined. So many surprises! I picked mine up at midnight when it was released and could hardly put it down.
So first off...the wedding was beautiful. The honeymoon was even better. Stephenie Meyer did an amazing job of writing a "tasteful" honeymoon scene. It wasn't dirty at all. It was beautiful. You knew they were able to have sex and that there was a definate strong "intensity" during these moments but she didn't go into too many explicit details which leaves much to the imagination (I loved the quote by Bella, "Why am I covered in feathers?"). It was PG-13. Plus they were married when it happened so that made it even better. I have to admit I was a little shocked she wrote the sex parts. I didn't think she would go there but I am so glad she did because it just made the bond between Edward and Bella even stronger if that was even possible. It was hot and sexy for sure! I am so happy Edward and Bella got their proper wedding & honeymoon and more importantly....that I got to read about it like I was right there! Does that make me a pervert? Oh who cares! It was amazing!
So what I never dreamed of happening was a pregnancy! This is when the story goes from pure happiness to total uncertainty and even sadness for some. Bella is adamant that she would keep the baby even though it was killing her, hoping she could keep her heart beating long enough so she could be turned into a vampire to save her. I have never felt so horrible for Edward. To say he was in agony would be an understatement. Chapter 9 was very hard for me to read because Edward was in so much pain. Pain isn’t even close to describing what he was feeling. Not that I doubted before but it was in this chapter that really solidified that Edward would do ANYTHING for Bella no matter how much pain it caused him. Pain he feels he deserves. I felt awful for him.
Chapter 18...the birth was by far the most intense chapter of all the books in the series for me. I was literally shaking as I read it. It was pretty graphic with Bella’s bones cracking and breaking, her spine shattering, throwing up all the blood she had been drinking to feed her unborn child. She was dying. I was on the edge of my seat wondering if they would be able to save the baby and at the same time save her. I always hoped Bella would become a vampire but I always had this feeling that Stephenie wouldn’t let that happen. I am so happy I was wrong. One of my favorite parts from the chapter was when Jacob was giving Bella CPR after the baby was born….
“Move your hands, Jacob,”
I looked up from Bella’s white eyes, still pumping her heart for her. Edward had a syringe in his hand-all silver, like it was made from steel.
“What’s that?”
His stone hand knocked mine out of the way. There was a tiny crunch as his blow broke my little finger. In the same second, he shoved the needle straight into her heart.
“My venom,” he answered as he pushed the plunger down.
You could feel that at this moment Edward was very somber. He was turning the woman he loved into a vampire. Something he had fought against for a long time because he didn't want her to have to give up any human experiences and eventually regret becoming a vampire. Now he did it to save her. There was no other way. I wish I could have been in his head at this time though it would have been very depressing I'm sure. Jacob too had to give in to letting her become a vampire to save her.
So now not only was Bella changed into a vampire, but she
was a mother and a wife. So many changes so fast. This all shocked me but nothing shocked me more than when Jacob imprints on Bella & Edward’s baby...Renesmee(not fond of the name...but thank goodness it wasn't an Edward Jacob! That name irritated me even more). I have to admit though it kinda freaked me out at first. I don't blame Bella for wanting to tear him apart. Like me I don't think she could have ever imagined this happening. This event was so significant. It released all the pain Jacob had to endure by being in love with Bella but knowing she would never be his. At the same time it tied him to her permanently. He still loved her but in the way it should have always been. He loved her as a friend and nothing more. Also with her change into a vampire & birth of Renesmee brought a release from the pull she felt to have Jacob as part of her life, though he would still be because of the whole imprinting thing but it would never complicate things between her and Edward’s relationship again which I was very grateful for. She loved him as a brother like she always wanted. Everything was as it should be.
So in the end the challenge was the Volturi. They were coming to kill all of them because they believed Edward & Bella had created a youngling. Changed a child into a vampire when really Renesmee was the biological child of Edward and Bella. I cried (the ugly kind, I was hysterical) at a point when Edward and Bella said their quiet goodbyes to their daughter and Jacob when they thought they were about to die. It was heart wrenching. It was so touching when Edward said to Jacob, "Goodbye Jacob, my brother.....my son." What a wonderful gesture from Edward to Jacob. Luckily in the end they were able to conquer because of Bella and her amazing gift to shield everyone she loved from the "special" gifts of the Volturi. I thought it was wonderful to see Bella so powerful and strong. That for once she was able to be the protector instead of the one being protected. She got to be the savior. This too made the unbreakable bond between her and Edward stronger. Because of her they were able to beat the Volturi and save their daughter that they loved more than anything. Their family was intact.
One of my absolute favorite parts (there are so many I have to say) was at the end when Bella removes her "shield" so Edward can read her thoughts. Edward was NOT expecting this. Not being able to all this time has driven him mad at times. Especially when it came to Jacob. He always wondered if Bella made the right decision. Now he knows without a doubt that she always loved him and that nothing can or ever will change that. Edward got to experience all the feelings she had for him as far back as she could remember. He can know now without a doubt that they truly belong together. What a wonderful gift to give Edward. Oh I just LOVE Edward! That Bella is one lucky vampire.
I was so glad this book had the Happily Ever After ending. Especially after all the horrible things that have occured in the past. Everything came together beautifully. I loved it. I liked Jacob a lot more in this book in fact I laughed out loud several times at him. I also liked Bella a lot more when she became a vampire. She wasn't as selfish and winey. I wanted to strangle her at times in the other books because of the way she treated Edward and even Jacob. The pain she caused both of them in the past because of her own selfish desires. Everything for the characters is balanced or in line how it should be in their relationships. I feel closer with the story now which I needed badly. These books totally consumed me to say the least. This was my favorite of the series by far. It was filled with love, suspense, true friendship, loyalty, sorrow, happiness and so much more. I look forward to reading it again! I don't think I will ever be able to find a series again that has affected me like this. These books are my favorites above all others!
(less)
So first off...the wedding was beautiful. The honeymoon was even better. Stephenie Meyer did an amazing job of writing a "tasteful" honeymoon scene. It wasn't dirty at all. It was beautiful. You knew they were able to have sex and that there was a definate strong "intensity" during these moments but she didn't go into too...more Where do I begin? I LOVED this book. It was even better than I even imagined. So many surprises! I picked mine up at midnight when it was released and could hardly put it down.
So first off...the wedding was beautiful. The honeymoon was even better. Stephenie Meyer did an amazing job of writing a "tasteful" honeymoon scene. It wasn't dirty at all. It was beautiful. You knew they were able to have sex and that there was a definate strong "intensity" during these moments but she didn't go into too many explicit details which leaves much to the imagination (I loved the quote by Bella, "Why am I covered in feathers?"). It was PG-13. Plus they were married when it happened so that made it even better. I have to admit I was a little shocked she wrote the sex parts. I didn't think she would go there but I am so glad she did because it just made the bond between Edward and Bella even stronger if that was even possible. It was hot and sexy for sure! I am so happy Edward and Bella got their proper wedding & honeymoon and more importantly....that I got to read about it like I was right there! Does that make me a pervert? Oh who cares! It was amazing!
So what I never dreamed of happening was a pregnancy! This is when the story goes from pure happiness to total uncertainty and even sadness for some. Bella is adamant that she would keep the baby even though it was killing her, hoping she could keep her heart beating long enough so she could be turned into a vampire to save her. I have never felt so horrible for Edward. To say he was in agony would be an understatement. Chapter 9 was very hard for me to read because Edward was in so much pain. Pain isn’t even close to describing what he was feeling. Not that I doubted before but it was in this chapter that really solidified that Edward would do ANYTHING for Bella no matter how much pain it caused him. Pain he feels he deserves. I felt awful for him.
Chapter 18...the birth was by far the most intense chapter of all the books in the series for me. I was literally shaking as I read it. It was pretty graphic with Bella’s bones cracking and breaking, her spine shattering, throwing up all the blood she had been drinking to feed her unborn child. She was dying. I was on the edge of my seat wondering if they would be able to save the baby and at the same time save her. I always hoped Bella would become a vampire but I always had this feeling that Stephenie wouldn’t let that happen. I am so happy I was wrong. One of my favorite parts from the chapter was when Jacob was giving Bella CPR after the baby was born….
“Move your hands, Jacob,”
I looked up from Bella’s white eyes, still pumping her heart for her. Edward had a syringe in his hand-all silver, like it was made from steel.
“What’s that?”
His stone hand knocked mine out of the way. There was a tiny crunch as his blow broke my little finger. In the same second, he shoved the needle straight into her heart.
“My venom,” he answered as he pushed the plunger down.
You could feel that at this moment Edward was very somber. He was turning the woman he loved into a vampire. Something he had fought against for a long time because he didn't want her to have to give up any human experiences and eventually regret becoming a vampire. Now he did it to save her. There was no other way. I wish I could have been in his head at this time though it would have been very depressing I'm sure. Jacob too had to give in to letting her become a vampire to save her.
So now not only was Bella changed into a vampire, but she
was a mother and a wife. So many changes so fast. This all shocked me but nothing shocked me more than when Jacob imprints on Bella & Edward’s baby...Renesmee(not fond of the name...but thank goodness it wasn't an Edward Jacob! That name irritated me even more). I have to admit though it kinda freaked me out at first. I don't blame Bella for wanting to tear him apart. Like me I don't think she could have ever imagined this happening. This event was so significant. It released all the pain Jacob had to endure by being in love with Bella but knowing she would never be his. At the same time it tied him to her permanently. He still loved her but in the way it should have always been. He loved her as a friend and nothing more. Also with her change into a vampire & birth of Renesmee brought a release from the pull she felt to have Jacob as part of her life, though he would still be because of the whole imprinting thing but it would never complicate things between her and Edward’s relationship again which I was very grateful for. She loved him as a brother like she always wanted. Everything was as it should be.
So in the end the challenge was the Volturi. They were coming to kill all of them because they believed Edward & Bella had created a youngling. Changed a child into a vampire when really Renesmee was the biological child of Edward and Bella. I cried (the ugly kind, I was hysterical) at a point when Edward and Bella said their quiet goodbyes to their daughter and Jacob when they thought they were about to die. It was heart wrenching. It was so touching when Edward said to Jacob, "Goodbye Jacob, my brother.....my son." What a wonderful gesture from Edward to Jacob. Luckily in the end they were able to conquer because of Bella and her amazing gift to shield everyone she loved from the "special" gifts of the Volturi. I thought it was wonderful to see Bella so powerful and strong. That for once she was able to be the protector instead of the one being protected. She got to be the savior. This too made the unbreakable bond between her and Edward stronger. Because of her they were able to beat the Volturi and save their daughter that they loved more than anything. Their family was intact.
One of my absolute favorite parts (there are so many I have to say) was at the end when Bella removes her "shield" so Edward can read her thoughts. Edward was NOT expecting this. Not being able to all this time has driven him mad at times. Especially when it came to Jacob. He always wondered if Bella made the right decision. Now he knows without a doubt that she always loved him and that nothing can or ever will change that. Edward got to experience all the feelings she had for him as far back as she could remember. He can know now without a doubt that they truly belong together. What a wonderful gift to give Edward. Oh I just LOVE Edward! That Bella is one lucky vampire.
I was so glad this book had the Happily Ever After ending. Especially after all the horrible things that have occured in the past. Everything came together beautifully. I loved it. I liked Jacob a lot more in this book in fact I laughed out loud several times at him. I also liked Bella a lot more when she became a vampire. She wasn't as selfish and winey. I wanted to strangle her at times in the other books because of the way she treated Edward and even Jacob. The pain she caused both of them in the past because of her own selfish desires. Everything for the characters is balanced or in line how it should be in their relationships. I feel closer with the story now which I needed badly. These books totally consumed me to say the least. This was my favorite of the series by far. It was filled with love, suspense, true friendship, loyalty, sorrow, happiness and so much more. I look forward to reading it again! I don't think I will ever be able to find a series again that has affected me like this. These books are my favorites above all others!
(less)
192 likes · like · see review
Missy Jent watkins
Loved these books too. Wonderful review. Well put. Love the movies as well. Seen them all. Collecting them now. This series touched my heart and I'm s...more
Loved these books too. Wonderful review. Well put. Love the movies as well. Seen them all. Collecting them now. This series touched my heart and I'm sad that its over. Want to see more about Jacob and Nesse's future together and how the family is doing down the line. I will retread these books. But for now it's onto the Hunger Games. :)(less)
Jan 08, 2013 01:29am
Jan 08, 2013 01:29am
Ivanesca
"Plus they were married when it happened so that made it even better." no it didn't.
Feb 20, 2013 09:05am
Feb 20, 2013 09:05am
Reviewer update Aug 2009: I have demoted the book from 5 to 4 stars. My confession/explanation is at the end of the original, unedited review.
___
Yes, I gave it 5-stars. This is partly because I was so pleased by it compared to the last two books in the series that I overreacted. But I also approve of her approach to the book and have rated it so highly in order to counteract those reviewers out there who hated it because they felt Bella was a bad example to young girls.
***THESE TWO PARAGRAPHS SP...more Reviewer update Aug 2009: I have demoted the book from 5 to 4 stars. My confession/explanation is at the end of the original, unedited review.
___
Yes, I gave it 5-stars. This is partly because I was so pleased by it compared to the last two books in the series that I overreacted. But I also approve of her approach to the book and have rated it so highly in order to counteract those reviewers out there who hated it because they felt Bella was a bad example to young girls.
***THESE TWO PARAGRAPHS SPOIL THINGS THAT HAPPEN EARLY IN THE BOOK***
I have a bone to pick with these people. Read some of the reviews on Amazon or GoodReads and you will find a certain type of person who feels that Bella's character fails as a role model for young women today. Why? Because she, gasp, got married and had a child at a young age.
Oh, my, what is the world coming to when young people choose eternal love and devotion! (Oh that more young women could be more like the implausibly articulate yet utterly selfish lead in the movie Juno!) In my favorite example, one reviewer on Amazon claimed it wasn't credible that a girl as young as Bella would feel joy at sensing a baby growing inside her. "I'm 28 and if I felt something moving in me, I would freak," she said, "I can't believe a 19-year old would be happy about it."
***END OF SPOILAGE***
Sadness ensues. Women and men from every culture in every era of history have found a tremendous and peculiar satisfaction in their children. It doesn't matter where you believe this instinct came from, it's real and it manifests millions of times over. Should we be so surprised that Stephenie Meyer would be one of the billions who believe this love to be real? Read the author's bio and it becomes clear: She was married at 21 before she finished college and had three children while still in her 20s. But one can hardly call her a "failure" for choosing family first. By all standards she's fabulously successful and wealthy. Plus, she has a college degree (one of the big beefs some people had with Bella's choice to postpone college). Are we really surprised that Stephenie would see the world through rose-colored, happiness-prone glasses when her own life is exactly that, deliriously happy?
Social polemics aside for a moment. The one thing this book lacked was a satisfying climactic, apocalyptic battle royale between the forces of vampire good and vampire evil. I know this book was intended to cap off a romance series, not The Lord of the Rings but there's a reason books of high fantasy all end in cataclysmic bloodshed. It takes a conflict of such dramatic proportions to drive the point of a story deep into our minds. And the point of this story, if you weren't too focused on your own family planning to notice it, was worthy of such dramatic punctuation.
The real point of this book is that we can and should choose love. That despite our personal weaknesses and faults -- our immature attempts at love and our petty jealousies -- we can make important, permanent decisions that will tie us to other people, making their lives and our lives better in the process. The battle I propose -- one I hope sees the light of day in a future novel -- would seal Bella's decisions and the decisions of her family and loved ones in a way that would render their commitments real. Their marital love, their parental love, their familial love, and the love of fellowship with others who share their principles.
Some would have to die to preserve the love they have made immortal. Others would have to kill to do the same. Nothing is more final, especially for immortals. But they would do so to symbolize the triumph of their love over the petty dynasty of the Volturi and thus establish a global movement of vampires that respect human life and restrain their selfish hungers in deference to the greater good. Something that wise humans do every day.
Such a symbolic battle would take this series to the next level. But even without it, this book is the best evidence that Meyer wasn't really writing a sloppy romance saga for misty-eyed girls, but was instead telling a story about the eternal power of love and self-denial.
___
Update from Aug 2009
I have had some fabulous comments to my review (please read them, most are very intelligent). I have been properly chided by many of these reviews for overreacting to the "Bella is a bad role model" flack and failing to acknowledge the principal flaw of this book. Amy said it best below: Meyer shortchanged us by not forcing Bella to face any hard choices. Bella got everything she wanted, including a (strange) relationship with Jacob. Nobody she loved got hurt -- which was the problem I did mention above -- and she never had to disappoint anyone.
Given that a year has passed, I have some distance on all the whining that went on about Bella not being a protofeminist. As a result, I should own up to the fact that this fourth book fails to deliver not only the climax I hoped for, but the real character crisis and development that a saga of this length should strive for. Or that we all should strive for in our own lives, to go all metaphysical on you for a moment. So I have demoted the book from 5 stars to 4 and begun to ruminate on the topic of why Meyer -- a woman possessed of such clear imagination -- was unwilling or unable to make Bella's life hard. Here's what I have come up with, for what it's worth:
1 - Meyer's own life is pretty darn pleasant. Let's be honest, she has everything most people think they want. All of us who struggle to write books that nobody reads desperately wish for her success (a fact that generates more than few snippy comments on Goodreads, I might suggest). She has a whole community of women around her who adore her and come to all-night parties when she debuts a book or movie, just to be near her. In the end, she might make Bella after her own image because she doesn't know that life ultimately requires pain.
2 - Meyer is a Mormon. For those not acquainted with the faith, Mormonism is a faith that believes everything will ultimately be okay. If not in this life, then in the next. In fact, the whole vampire immortality gig is just a metaphor for the Mormon idea of the afterlife: You get to be with the ones you love forever, without pain. In that way, Bella is a perfect reflection of the ideal Mormon eternity: God forgives us for our idiocy, acknowledges our flawed attempts at love by magnifying them and making them eternal. Though this is only one side of Mormonism -- it's also a faith with sorrowful history of persecution. Mormons certainly suffer plenty in this life just like everyone else, so this explanation is only true to the extent that Meyer has willingly isolated Mormonism's view of the end state of humanity.
3 - Twilight is just escapist fantasy. This is not only the most obvious but probably the strongest of my three explanations. We're so accustomed to watching James Bond run through the street with machine guns trained on him that never hit their mark that we no longer point out that Bond is completely implausible and ultimately unsatisfying as a character. But we're not used to reading fiction in which women get everything they want. (At least, I'm not.) So we get tied up in knots about the lack of deeper meaning and pathos when in reality, Meyer never promised us a garden of sorrow and personal growth.
So even though I have to demote the book, I still feel like the saga was worth reading; both because of the fun I had teasing about its flaws but also because it gives me fodder for worthwhile introspection. Oh, and it connected me to some great commenters who I now follow on Goodreads.
Also, a request: Please read my book, Broken Mirror Girl. It is available on Amazon's Kindle (for reading on any device you can think of, including your web browser). If you read it, I'd love to hear your comments on Amazon. I can take it (or I hope I can, after everything I've said about Meyer...).(less)
___
Yes, I gave it 5-stars. This is partly because I was so pleased by it compared to the last two books in the series that I overreacted. But I also approve of her approach to the book and have rated it so highly in order to counteract those reviewers out there who hated it because they felt Bella was a bad example to young girls.
***THESE TWO PARAGRAPHS SP...more Reviewer update Aug 2009: I have demoted the book from 5 to 4 stars. My confession/explanation is at the end of the original, unedited review.
___
Yes, I gave it 5-stars. This is partly because I was so pleased by it compared to the last two books in the series that I overreacted. But I also approve of her approach to the book and have rated it so highly in order to counteract those reviewers out there who hated it because they felt Bella was a bad example to young girls.
***THESE TWO PARAGRAPHS SPOIL THINGS THAT HAPPEN EARLY IN THE BOOK***
I have a bone to pick with these people. Read some of the reviews on Amazon or GoodReads and you will find a certain type of person who feels that Bella's character fails as a role model for young women today. Why? Because she, gasp, got married and had a child at a young age.
Oh, my, what is the world coming to when young people choose eternal love and devotion! (Oh that more young women could be more like the implausibly articulate yet utterly selfish lead in the movie Juno!) In my favorite example, one reviewer on Amazon claimed it wasn't credible that a girl as young as Bella would feel joy at sensing a baby growing inside her. "I'm 28 and if I felt something moving in me, I would freak," she said, "I can't believe a 19-year old would be happy about it."
***END OF SPOILAGE***
Sadness ensues. Women and men from every culture in every era of history have found a tremendous and peculiar satisfaction in their children. It doesn't matter where you believe this instinct came from, it's real and it manifests millions of times over. Should we be so surprised that Stephenie Meyer would be one of the billions who believe this love to be real? Read the author's bio and it becomes clear: She was married at 21 before she finished college and had three children while still in her 20s. But one can hardly call her a "failure" for choosing family first. By all standards she's fabulously successful and wealthy. Plus, she has a college degree (one of the big beefs some people had with Bella's choice to postpone college). Are we really surprised that Stephenie would see the world through rose-colored, happiness-prone glasses when her own life is exactly that, deliriously happy?
Social polemics aside for a moment. The one thing this book lacked was a satisfying climactic, apocalyptic battle royale between the forces of vampire good and vampire evil. I know this book was intended to cap off a romance series, not The Lord of the Rings but there's a reason books of high fantasy all end in cataclysmic bloodshed. It takes a conflict of such dramatic proportions to drive the point of a story deep into our minds. And the point of this story, if you weren't too focused on your own family planning to notice it, was worthy of such dramatic punctuation.
The real point of this book is that we can and should choose love. That despite our personal weaknesses and faults -- our immature attempts at love and our petty jealousies -- we can make important, permanent decisions that will tie us to other people, making their lives and our lives better in the process. The battle I propose -- one I hope sees the light of day in a future novel -- would seal Bella's decisions and the decisions of her family and loved ones in a way that would render their commitments real. Their marital love, their parental love, their familial love, and the love of fellowship with others who share their principles.
Some would have to die to preserve the love they have made immortal. Others would have to kill to do the same. Nothing is more final, especially for immortals. But they would do so to symbolize the triumph of their love over the petty dynasty of the Volturi and thus establish a global movement of vampires that respect human life and restrain their selfish hungers in deference to the greater good. Something that wise humans do every day.
Such a symbolic battle would take this series to the next level. But even without it, this book is the best evidence that Meyer wasn't really writing a sloppy romance saga for misty-eyed girls, but was instead telling a story about the eternal power of love and self-denial.
___
Update from Aug 2009
I have had some fabulous comments to my review (please read them, most are very intelligent). I have been properly chided by many of these reviews for overreacting to the "Bella is a bad role model" flack and failing to acknowledge the principal flaw of this book. Amy said it best below: Meyer shortchanged us by not forcing Bella to face any hard choices. Bella got everything she wanted, including a (strange) relationship with Jacob. Nobody she loved got hurt -- which was the problem I did mention above -- and she never had to disappoint anyone.
Given that a year has passed, I have some distance on all the whining that went on about Bella not being a protofeminist. As a result, I should own up to the fact that this fourth book fails to deliver not only the climax I hoped for, but the real character crisis and development that a saga of this length should strive for. Or that we all should strive for in our own lives, to go all metaphysical on you for a moment. So I have demoted the book from 5 stars to 4 and begun to ruminate on the topic of why Meyer -- a woman possessed of such clear imagination -- was unwilling or unable to make Bella's life hard. Here's what I have come up with, for what it's worth:
1 - Meyer's own life is pretty darn pleasant. Let's be honest, she has everything most people think they want. All of us who struggle to write books that nobody reads desperately wish for her success (a fact that generates more than few snippy comments on Goodreads, I might suggest). She has a whole community of women around her who adore her and come to all-night parties when she debuts a book or movie, just to be near her. In the end, she might make Bella after her own image because she doesn't know that life ultimately requires pain.
2 - Meyer is a Mormon. For those not acquainted with the faith, Mormonism is a faith that believes everything will ultimately be okay. If not in this life, then in the next. In fact, the whole vampire immortality gig is just a metaphor for the Mormon idea of the afterlife: You get to be with the ones you love forever, without pain. In that way, Bella is a perfect reflection of the ideal Mormon eternity: God forgives us for our idiocy, acknowledges our flawed attempts at love by magnifying them and making them eternal. Though this is only one side of Mormonism -- it's also a faith with sorrowful history of persecution. Mormons certainly suffer plenty in this life just like everyone else, so this explanation is only true to the extent that Meyer has willingly isolated Mormonism's view of the end state of humanity.
3 - Twilight is just escapist fantasy. This is not only the most obvious but probably the strongest of my three explanations. We're so accustomed to watching James Bond run through the street with machine guns trained on him that never hit their mark that we no longer point out that Bond is completely implausible and ultimately unsatisfying as a character. But we're not used to reading fiction in which women get everything they want. (At least, I'm not.) So we get tied up in knots about the lack of deeper meaning and pathos when in reality, Meyer never promised us a garden of sorrow and personal growth.
So even though I have to demote the book, I still feel like the saga was worth reading; both because of the fun I had teasing about its flaws but also because it gives me fodder for worthwhile introspection. Oh, and it connected me to some great commenters who I now follow on Goodreads.
Also, a request: Please read my book, Broken Mirror Girl. It is available on Amazon's Kindle (for reading on any device you can think of, including your web browser). If you read it, I'd love to hear your comments on Amazon. I can take it (or I hope I can, after everything I've said about Meyer...).(less)
164 likes · like · see review
Paris Henry
I agree with your review. Though I loved the book, i was left wanting for a "Battle Royale" too. And all your other points-very well made.
Jun 24, 2012 08:09pm
Jun 24, 2012 08:09pm
Nicki Ivey
"I still feel like the saga was worth reading; [...] because it gives me fodder for worthwhile introspection."
Agreed. And all the reviews, now that I'...more "I still feel like the saga was worth reading; [...] because it gives me fodder for worthwhile introspection."
Agreed. And all the reviews, now that I've read the books, give me good reference points to what people enjoy in a book, and what disappoints them.(less)
Jun 26, 2012 07:42pm
Agreed. And all the reviews, now that I'...more "I still feel like the saga was worth reading; [...] because it gives me fodder for worthwhile introspection."
Agreed. And all the reviews, now that I've read the books, give me good reference points to what people enjoy in a book, and what disappoints them.(less)
Jun 26, 2012 07:42pm
Warning: While I have tried earnestly to hide later plot developments under the cover of the spoiler tag, I can never be sure what constitutes a spoiler for other readers. I do talk in general terms about the plot pretty far into the book, and if that bothers you, you should probably give this review a pass. Also, I swear a lot.
I read Twilight more or less on a dare, mostly so I could swirl my chardonnay and get my schadenfreude on. While I can certainly snob out about how horribly Twilight is...more Warning: While I have tried earnestly to hide later plot developments under the cover of the spoiler tag, I can never be sure what constitutes a spoiler for other readers. I do talk in general terms about the plot pretty far into the book, and if that bothers you, you should probably give this review a pass. Also, I swear a lot.
I read Twilight more or less on a dare, mostly so I could swirl my chardonnay and get my schadenfreude on. While I can certainly snob out about how horribly Twilight is written on so many levels, I was surprised by how uncomfortable it made me. Meyer captured itchy, awkward adolescence with such an evocative squirm, and then she relieved that adolescent discomfort with a monstrous romantic bliss. I can see why so many people responded to this, even though I was still too busy breathing into a bag having flashbacks to middle school to relax and and get swept up in the romance. When she's good, she's good because she is not in control of her subject, not able to stop the outpouring of discomfort and terror underlying the domestic bliss that is a woman's expected relief, and while Twilight ends with a certain romantic harmony, Meyer doesn't perfect the ending. All impediments to Bella and Edward are not swept away, and they don't fade out to domestic harmony.
If you think about it, that's fascinating. I think if Meyer had been a seasoned writer, following the rules of mass market romance – and yes, I know that Twilight isn't mass market romance, but it does share some commonalities – she would have written a series of books shifting to other points of view, working out other romances within the Forksverse. Edward's coven would have been all unattached, the tribe would be introduced, and they would have hooked up pair by pair: Mike with Alice, Jacob with Rosalie, that one chick with Jasper. Edward and Bella and then the later couples would cameo in epilogues and picnics with their babies, doling out advice to the new lovers while they writhed in romantic incompleteness until they didn't, and then the sparkle ending could have been repeated ad infinitum. But Meyer is not that kind of writer; her strengths, such as they are, reside in her uncalculating evocation of...I'm struggling here...the terrors and pleasures of American femininity? The inherent conflict between the self protagonist and traditional gender roles? Some shit like that.
Fascinating or no, I had zero interest in reading any more Twilight books after the first. But because Twilight talk is pretty much what fuels the Goodreads engine – although this is changing a bit, thank heavens – I've followed roughly 89 kajillion conversations about the series, spoilered myself on the plots of each book, and spent more words on books I haven't read than is wise. I've wanted to read Breaking Dawn bad for a while, because I've been assured that Breaking Dawn is where the wheels come off, where Meyer's unexamined domestic panic goes insane and burns the house down. Those assurances were not wrong. I've been hamstrung by my disinterest in plowing through nearly a thousand pages of love triangles, cheesy stand-ins for the Catholic church, and racist, Rousseauian garbage about how Native Americans are in touch with their inner furry beastie to get to this book. (Also, Edward is not Heathcliff, he's Linton, and I'm not sure I can handle watching Meyer act out that mistake in Eclipse.) Anyway, point being, thank god for movies, because I got good and drunk and watched the movies of the middle two books with Elizabeth, who explained the stuff that they missed, and I was good and ready to read this.
I can see why they split Breaking Dawn into two movies, because it is two books. One is a shockingly naked expression of procreative terror, an effective horror novel which is effective because it is so completely, so thoroughly, so devastatingly unconscious. The other is a boring, mechanical attempt to cauterize the previous blood-letting, an act of wish fulfillment so severe it almost negates the power of the previous installment. The wish is to unsee the terror of the previous entry, but whoo boy, there is no unseeing that. Before reading this, I tried to think of novels that detail the process of pregnancy and childbirth, and I mean embody, not just use as grist from some guy's mid-life/Oedipal crisis, or mention as the conclusion to the novel. I blanked for a long time, but eventually I came up with two: Beloved, Toni Morrison's ghost story of slavery, and Barrayar, Lois McMaster Bujold's court intrigue of the domestic. I find it interesting that the pregnancies in these fictions are all metonymous in some way, dissociated. From Beloved, I have a vivid image of Sethe's water breaking in an unstoppable stream of piss, while her daughter-ghost rises in her high-necked white dress, or from Barrayar, Cordelia helping a woman deliver a baby during a battle, while her own swims in a tank, his fragile bones breaking. But neither of these births are normal by any stretch: disembodied, metaphorical, political, even while they have a fierce physicality that I can remember years later.
The dissociation in Breaking Dawn comes from the fact that the point of view shifts to Jacob for the whole of Bella's pregnancy. The book starts with the Swan-Cullen wedding, a dreary obvious affair with requisite reference to clothing. The newly minted Cullens then whisk to Brazil to a desert island, and a series of sexual encounters that feel like S&M literature written under the Hays Code. I found them alternately hilarious and unsettling: a bedroom filled with white downy feathers after Edward has pillow-bitten his way through the grind; Bella waking covered in bruises that she can't remember receiving, and begging a remorseful Edward into doing it again. She gets knocked up – pun intended - on the first try, though doesn't realize it for nigh on 100 pages of snorkeling, eating eggs, and trying on lingerie. We're in kill-me-now territory, for this reader. But they eventually figure it out, Edward making a tight-lipped phone call to Carlisle, his father/doctor, and Bella going completely fucking insane with baby fever.
Here's where the point of view shift happens, and it's breathtaking to behold. I try to avoid speculating about authorial motivation, but I think it's obvious that Meyer is bound up in Bella, at the very least as a wish-fulfillment vehicle, if not a full-blown author proxy. (Breaking Dawn does goes full Mary Sue in the last half though – more on that later.) And Meyer, for a variety of reasons, can't have her stand-in express the terror and discomfort of pregnancy, the doubt and fear, the sheer towering life-and-death of it all, so she turns to another who can. Jacob performs his task admirably, giving voice to thoughts that by all rights Bella should be having, would be having, if she weren't silenced by her standing as idealized womanhood. The pregnancy is breakneck, almost literally, a week of gestation collapsed into a day. Bella grows hollow-eyed, starved of nutrition by her fetal parasite, her ribs cracking by the sudden ballooning of her body, sipping blood out of a styrofoam cup with a lid and straw. In one awful scene, her pelvis snaps.
Holy fuck. I've had some babies, and I was harrowed by these descriptions. While I found much of pregnancy novel, and enjoyable in its novelty in some regards – when else can I experience being kicked in the bladder from within my own body? - pregnancy was also uncomfortable and scary, on both physical and existential levels. My son gave me an umbilical hernia, which necessitated surgery; I am riddled with stretch marks; I had never once experienced heartburn before my nascent kids pushed my stomach into my throat. (What is this sensation I am feeling?? My heart it burns! Oh, so that's heartburn. Sucks.) And I had it easy compared to some of the horror stories I've heard from friends, bedridden with a variety of leaking, potentially lethal pregnancy-induced conditions. I've been dithering for the last half hour, trying to figure how to say this out loud, this unspeakable truth, but I believe that every pregnant woman, regardless of her politics or her beliefs, thinks to herself at some point, this thing inside me has no right to kill me. I resent that I may have to choose between my life and another's. I resent that I am expected to love someone more than myself, sight unseen. I love myself. I choose me.
Phew. I'm feeling a little gross after writing that, but there it is. Bella doesn't say anything like this, and Jacob twists and howls, saying it for her. I thank the starry heavens that we make it through Bella's pregnancy in another character's head, because she is freakishly placid and resigned. Bella is surrounded by unwomen – the barren, the childless – who protect Bella's wishes to go through this unwise, fatal pregnancy because they don't care about her at all, they only care about the baby. The sterile werewolf who hates Bella and Jacob, Rosalie who has been opposed to Bella's transformation into a vampire on the grounds that Bella will not be able to have children, these women give voice to the conundrum that they are giving Bella what she needs to become a woman, in this traditionalist mindset, but that the woman is disposable in that act of creation. Good gravy, think about it, it's so fucking sick and perfect that it kills me a little.
At the end of Jacob's pov section, Bella goes into labor, such as it is. Honestly, I have never read anything scarier in my life, the placenta detaching, Carlisle, the doctor, conveniently off set. This is a mutant, remember, encased in a placental sac so hard that it can only be gotten through with teeth, the infant's teeth. It is a shower of blood, one that had me flashing back to my own deliveries, and not in a good way. This following bit is gross and overshare, so don't hit the spoiler box unless you really want to hear this. (view spoiler)[I had repressed this memory, but after 42 hours of labor, and a nail-biting finish where I nearly bled to death, I remember being wheeled out after all the stitches and happy conclusions (in that neither I nor my son were dead) and seeing the river of blood and fluid on the floor, leading to a drain. The next two days, before someone finally cottoned to the fact that I was severely anemic and gave me a blood transfusion, are an etoilated haze. I remember lying in bed, two mornings before, after waking up to my water silently breaking, and thinking, holy shit, there is no way out of this now. I have to experience the next 12 hours – this was hope talking, though I didn't know it – and there is absolutely nothing I can do to stop it. It was the moment before the roller coaster went down the hill, and I didn't know if there were tracks at the end, and that was panic, pure panic. (hide spoiler)]
The birthing sequence is told twice, once from Jacob's pov, and once from Bella's, and it's fascinating to compare. Jacob is angry and horrified, like you are when you are a rational human watching a mutant baby eat its way out of a woman you love. Bella's perspective is batshit insanity. I went back and re-read this part today, after I finished, because I have this horrible image of Bella's child smiling at her with a full set of teeth – seriously, close your eyes and imagine an infant with a full set of teeth, smiling – shudder, shudder – and I couldn't remember whether Bella noted this, or Jacob. It was Bella, and that image fills her with joy. I'm running out of expletives, but holy cussed godamn fucking shit. I'm losing the capacity to talk about this coherently, because this is so fucking insane.
So. Baby born, who is flawless and perfect. Bella transformed into vampire, now flawless and perfect. From here on out, the plot could not be more boring, more impossible, more unnecessary. There's some thing with the Voltari making a power play for the baby or something – seriously, I'm not detailing the plot because it makes so little sense. I barked out some laughs when Bella and Edward go at it like marble rabbits every night when the baby goes to sleep – hahahahahahahahah, such an accurate depiction of new parenthood. I completely lost my shit when, after roughly seven hundred new characters are introduced, Jacob says something to the effect of: how am I going to keep all these people straight?! Next to his statement is a little asterisk.*
*See page 756 is written below, and I am sent back to an index – hahahahahaha – that is a list of characters complete with helpful little strike-throughs for the characters who have died in previous books – hahahahaha. Holy shit, woman, have a little more faith in your writing.
It's like Meyer squeezed out this horrible truth, and then panicked, canonizing Bella and stripping out all the narrative danger, all the reality. We don't really hear again from Jacob or the wolves, which is incredibly frustrating, because obviously Sam and Jacob(view spoiler)[ make up at the end, but all of that occurs off-stage. And there are a bunch of new wolves??? And they are not really werewolves, we learn in an infodump?? (hide spoiler)] Everyone recedes into a prop for the perfect child, one that makes everyone instantly love her. Meyer spent all her truth on the trauma of childbirth, and once we're back in Bella's head, she can't express the impolite notion that infants can be difficult to love. I do believe in a certain amount of parental instinct – we wouldn't make it far as a species without it – but for most new mothers, we are struggling with exhaustion, blood loss, and a dizzying hormonal stew when our babies are at their neediest: screaming, feeding, pooping on a loony schedule. Teeth or not, they do not smile for weeks, and while that first smile is intensely satisfying – I can still remember the first time the boy laughed, and that was sheer joy transmitted by sound – the weeks before are managing an uncommunicative alien who has consumed your life.
Oh shit though! How could I forget the imprinting?? Sweet zombie Jebus. Jacob does express this impolite anger at the child at the end of his section, stalking down to murder the infant for what she has done to Bella. It is the cheapest, grossest cop-out ever that his anger is magicked away by some sort of gross sexual soul mating. (I know I've used gross twice in that sentence; sue me.) I'm way ZOMG about the idea of imprinting – this is what I get for not reading the previous books, where they explain why only guys imprint, and why imprinting isn't the most kinked idea ever. Edward's convenient mind-reading keeps telling us that Jacob only has pure thoughts for his infant bride, but come on. I suspect that Meyer pulled this stunt to give poor, rejected Jacob a consolation prize, and to keep him from running out of there. One of the last chapter speeches is about the power of family, and how family is choice and a bunch of other garbage. Jacob would never choose to stay with this family Meyer has constructed without magical duress. But with imprinting, now the cult can be complete! (And, though these thoughts lack coherence, I think there might be something in this imprinting business that is about sexual competition between mothers and daughters, and the uncomfortable reality that all children grow to become sexual beings. The imprinting puts a tight leash – pun intended – on the child's inevitable adolescent sexuality. Best mother ever!)
Bella goes full Mary Sue in the end, even her trademark clumsiness erased, her beauty perfected, her talents blooming into story-destroying weapons. She's so good at everything that she makes conflict impossible. (view spoiler)[I was sorely disappointed by the big “battle” with the Voltori, who succumb to her perfect motherhood in the most boring episode of Vampire Matlock ever. Which is super funny, because Alice's clairvoyance is obviously the real reason that any of that worked out, but that's the trouble with clairvoyant characters – they really know how to spoil a plot. I spent a fair amount of time laughing when Alice bails, and everyone is like, nooooes! That must mean we are dooooooomed!! Because, you know, there's no other good reason for a clairvoyant to head out on some super secret mission when there's a big throw-down on the horizon. Certainly she won't arrive at the perfect moment with some major trump card. That's not more likely at all. But Alice's decampment serves as grist for the emo mill, and without all the hand-wringing brought on by her leaving, there would be almost no emotional drama – clearly fake as it is – to the any of the boring, perfect proceedings leading up to the end. (hide spoiler)]
Much as the last section bored me to tears, at least when it wasn't grossing me out, I was zero to the bone on the last page. Bella and Edward's forever and evers to one another, the vision of this family locked into an unchanging perfect stasis, unable to sleep or dream, fundamentally cut off from the larger world, this hit me like a ton of ice. Good god, who wants this? Who aspires to shed every single vestige of their humanity in the attainment of domestic perfection? And having gotten there, who thinks this perfection is anything but a horrible nightmare? Edward was right at the first: an existence of unchanging perfection is no life at all. Throughout this book, the people in Bella's life disappear on by one: only a brief mention of her school friends at the wedding, then silence, her mother considered and then discarded again, her father brought in in the most ancillary way possible, the concerns of lives of the werewolves dropped after Jacob is neutered. Breaking Dawn is a chilling portrait of the most self-serving narcissism, that old Freudian saw about procreation as immortality turned monstrous in its perfection. I just went and tucked my kids into bed, and I feel fiercely in this moment how transitory their childhoods are, how precious it is that they grow and change, what a gift it is that we fight, and even that we inevitably die. It's quite a feat Meyer performed here, making me cozy up to my death while I tuck my kids in. Grief is the left hand of happiness, to misquote my beloved Ursula K Le Guin, and I hold my children with both hands. Anything else is as dishonest as it is awkward.
Cross-posted on Readerling(less)
I read Twilight more or less on a dare, mostly so I could swirl my chardonnay and get my schadenfreude on. While I can certainly snob out about how horribly Twilight is...more Warning: While I have tried earnestly to hide later plot developments under the cover of the spoiler tag, I can never be sure what constitutes a spoiler for other readers. I do talk in general terms about the plot pretty far into the book, and if that bothers you, you should probably give this review a pass. Also, I swear a lot.
I read Twilight more or less on a dare, mostly so I could swirl my chardonnay and get my schadenfreude on. While I can certainly snob out about how horribly Twilight is written on so many levels, I was surprised by how uncomfortable it made me. Meyer captured itchy, awkward adolescence with such an evocative squirm, and then she relieved that adolescent discomfort with a monstrous romantic bliss. I can see why so many people responded to this, even though I was still too busy breathing into a bag having flashbacks to middle school to relax and and get swept up in the romance. When she's good, she's good because she is not in control of her subject, not able to stop the outpouring of discomfort and terror underlying the domestic bliss that is a woman's expected relief, and while Twilight ends with a certain romantic harmony, Meyer doesn't perfect the ending. All impediments to Bella and Edward are not swept away, and they don't fade out to domestic harmony.
If you think about it, that's fascinating. I think if Meyer had been a seasoned writer, following the rules of mass market romance – and yes, I know that Twilight isn't mass market romance, but it does share some commonalities – she would have written a series of books shifting to other points of view, working out other romances within the Forksverse. Edward's coven would have been all unattached, the tribe would be introduced, and they would have hooked up pair by pair: Mike with Alice, Jacob with Rosalie, that one chick with Jasper. Edward and Bella and then the later couples would cameo in epilogues and picnics with their babies, doling out advice to the new lovers while they writhed in romantic incompleteness until they didn't, and then the sparkle ending could have been repeated ad infinitum. But Meyer is not that kind of writer; her strengths, such as they are, reside in her uncalculating evocation of...I'm struggling here...the terrors and pleasures of American femininity? The inherent conflict between the self protagonist and traditional gender roles? Some shit like that.
Fascinating or no, I had zero interest in reading any more Twilight books after the first. But because Twilight talk is pretty much what fuels the Goodreads engine – although this is changing a bit, thank heavens – I've followed roughly 89 kajillion conversations about the series, spoilered myself on the plots of each book, and spent more words on books I haven't read than is wise. I've wanted to read Breaking Dawn bad for a while, because I've been assured that Breaking Dawn is where the wheels come off, where Meyer's unexamined domestic panic goes insane and burns the house down. Those assurances were not wrong. I've been hamstrung by my disinterest in plowing through nearly a thousand pages of love triangles, cheesy stand-ins for the Catholic church, and racist, Rousseauian garbage about how Native Americans are in touch with their inner furry beastie to get to this book. (Also, Edward is not Heathcliff, he's Linton, and I'm not sure I can handle watching Meyer act out that mistake in Eclipse.) Anyway, point being, thank god for movies, because I got good and drunk and watched the movies of the middle two books with Elizabeth, who explained the stuff that they missed, and I was good and ready to read this.
I can see why they split Breaking Dawn into two movies, because it is two books. One is a shockingly naked expression of procreative terror, an effective horror novel which is effective because it is so completely, so thoroughly, so devastatingly unconscious. The other is a boring, mechanical attempt to cauterize the previous blood-letting, an act of wish fulfillment so severe it almost negates the power of the previous installment. The wish is to unsee the terror of the previous entry, but whoo boy, there is no unseeing that. Before reading this, I tried to think of novels that detail the process of pregnancy and childbirth, and I mean embody, not just use as grist from some guy's mid-life/Oedipal crisis, or mention as the conclusion to the novel. I blanked for a long time, but eventually I came up with two: Beloved, Toni Morrison's ghost story of slavery, and Barrayar, Lois McMaster Bujold's court intrigue of the domestic. I find it interesting that the pregnancies in these fictions are all metonymous in some way, dissociated. From Beloved, I have a vivid image of Sethe's water breaking in an unstoppable stream of piss, while her daughter-ghost rises in her high-necked white dress, or from Barrayar, Cordelia helping a woman deliver a baby during a battle, while her own swims in a tank, his fragile bones breaking. But neither of these births are normal by any stretch: disembodied, metaphorical, political, even while they have a fierce physicality that I can remember years later.
The dissociation in Breaking Dawn comes from the fact that the point of view shifts to Jacob for the whole of Bella's pregnancy. The book starts with the Swan-Cullen wedding, a dreary obvious affair with requisite reference to clothing. The newly minted Cullens then whisk to Brazil to a desert island, and a series of sexual encounters that feel like S&M literature written under the Hays Code. I found them alternately hilarious and unsettling: a bedroom filled with white downy feathers after Edward has pillow-bitten his way through the grind; Bella waking covered in bruises that she can't remember receiving, and begging a remorseful Edward into doing it again. She gets knocked up – pun intended - on the first try, though doesn't realize it for nigh on 100 pages of snorkeling, eating eggs, and trying on lingerie. We're in kill-me-now territory, for this reader. But they eventually figure it out, Edward making a tight-lipped phone call to Carlisle, his father/doctor, and Bella going completely fucking insane with baby fever.
Here's where the point of view shift happens, and it's breathtaking to behold. I try to avoid speculating about authorial motivation, but I think it's obvious that Meyer is bound up in Bella, at the very least as a wish-fulfillment vehicle, if not a full-blown author proxy. (Breaking Dawn does goes full Mary Sue in the last half though – more on that later.) And Meyer, for a variety of reasons, can't have her stand-in express the terror and discomfort of pregnancy, the doubt and fear, the sheer towering life-and-death of it all, so she turns to another who can. Jacob performs his task admirably, giving voice to thoughts that by all rights Bella should be having, would be having, if she weren't silenced by her standing as idealized womanhood. The pregnancy is breakneck, almost literally, a week of gestation collapsed into a day. Bella grows hollow-eyed, starved of nutrition by her fetal parasite, her ribs cracking by the sudden ballooning of her body, sipping blood out of a styrofoam cup with a lid and straw. In one awful scene, her pelvis snaps.
Holy fuck. I've had some babies, and I was harrowed by these descriptions. While I found much of pregnancy novel, and enjoyable in its novelty in some regards – when else can I experience being kicked in the bladder from within my own body? - pregnancy was also uncomfortable and scary, on both physical and existential levels. My son gave me an umbilical hernia, which necessitated surgery; I am riddled with stretch marks; I had never once experienced heartburn before my nascent kids pushed my stomach into my throat. (What is this sensation I am feeling?? My heart it burns! Oh, so that's heartburn. Sucks.) And I had it easy compared to some of the horror stories I've heard from friends, bedridden with a variety of leaking, potentially lethal pregnancy-induced conditions. I've been dithering for the last half hour, trying to figure how to say this out loud, this unspeakable truth, but I believe that every pregnant woman, regardless of her politics or her beliefs, thinks to herself at some point, this thing inside me has no right to kill me. I resent that I may have to choose between my life and another's. I resent that I am expected to love someone more than myself, sight unseen. I love myself. I choose me.
Phew. I'm feeling a little gross after writing that, but there it is. Bella doesn't say anything like this, and Jacob twists and howls, saying it for her. I thank the starry heavens that we make it through Bella's pregnancy in another character's head, because she is freakishly placid and resigned. Bella is surrounded by unwomen – the barren, the childless – who protect Bella's wishes to go through this unwise, fatal pregnancy because they don't care about her at all, they only care about the baby. The sterile werewolf who hates Bella and Jacob, Rosalie who has been opposed to Bella's transformation into a vampire on the grounds that Bella will not be able to have children, these women give voice to the conundrum that they are giving Bella what she needs to become a woman, in this traditionalist mindset, but that the woman is disposable in that act of creation. Good gravy, think about it, it's so fucking sick and perfect that it kills me a little.
At the end of Jacob's pov section, Bella goes into labor, such as it is. Honestly, I have never read anything scarier in my life, the placenta detaching, Carlisle, the doctor, conveniently off set. This is a mutant, remember, encased in a placental sac so hard that it can only be gotten through with teeth, the infant's teeth. It is a shower of blood, one that had me flashing back to my own deliveries, and not in a good way. This following bit is gross and overshare, so don't hit the spoiler box unless you really want to hear this. (view spoiler)[I had repressed this memory, but after 42 hours of labor, and a nail-biting finish where I nearly bled to death, I remember being wheeled out after all the stitches and happy conclusions (in that neither I nor my son were dead) and seeing the river of blood and fluid on the floor, leading to a drain. The next two days, before someone finally cottoned to the fact that I was severely anemic and gave me a blood transfusion, are an etoilated haze. I remember lying in bed, two mornings before, after waking up to my water silently breaking, and thinking, holy shit, there is no way out of this now. I have to experience the next 12 hours – this was hope talking, though I didn't know it – and there is absolutely nothing I can do to stop it. It was the moment before the roller coaster went down the hill, and I didn't know if there were tracks at the end, and that was panic, pure panic. (hide spoiler)]
The birthing sequence is told twice, once from Jacob's pov, and once from Bella's, and it's fascinating to compare. Jacob is angry and horrified, like you are when you are a rational human watching a mutant baby eat its way out of a woman you love. Bella's perspective is batshit insanity. I went back and re-read this part today, after I finished, because I have this horrible image of Bella's child smiling at her with a full set of teeth – seriously, close your eyes and imagine an infant with a full set of teeth, smiling – shudder, shudder – and I couldn't remember whether Bella noted this, or Jacob. It was Bella, and that image fills her with joy. I'm running out of expletives, but holy cussed godamn fucking shit. I'm losing the capacity to talk about this coherently, because this is so fucking insane.
So. Baby born, who is flawless and perfect. Bella transformed into vampire, now flawless and perfect. From here on out, the plot could not be more boring, more impossible, more unnecessary. There's some thing with the Voltari making a power play for the baby or something – seriously, I'm not detailing the plot because it makes so little sense. I barked out some laughs when Bella and Edward go at it like marble rabbits every night when the baby goes to sleep – hahahahahahahahah, such an accurate depiction of new parenthood. I completely lost my shit when, after roughly seven hundred new characters are introduced, Jacob says something to the effect of: how am I going to keep all these people straight?! Next to his statement is a little asterisk.*
*See page 756 is written below, and I am sent back to an index – hahahahahaha – that is a list of characters complete with helpful little strike-throughs for the characters who have died in previous books – hahahahaha. Holy shit, woman, have a little more faith in your writing.
It's like Meyer squeezed out this horrible truth, and then panicked, canonizing Bella and stripping out all the narrative danger, all the reality. We don't really hear again from Jacob or the wolves, which is incredibly frustrating, because obviously Sam and Jacob(view spoiler)[ make up at the end, but all of that occurs off-stage. And there are a bunch of new wolves??? And they are not really werewolves, we learn in an infodump?? (hide spoiler)] Everyone recedes into a prop for the perfect child, one that makes everyone instantly love her. Meyer spent all her truth on the trauma of childbirth, and once we're back in Bella's head, she can't express the impolite notion that infants can be difficult to love. I do believe in a certain amount of parental instinct – we wouldn't make it far as a species without it – but for most new mothers, we are struggling with exhaustion, blood loss, and a dizzying hormonal stew when our babies are at their neediest: screaming, feeding, pooping on a loony schedule. Teeth or not, they do not smile for weeks, and while that first smile is intensely satisfying – I can still remember the first time the boy laughed, and that was sheer joy transmitted by sound – the weeks before are managing an uncommunicative alien who has consumed your life.
Oh shit though! How could I forget the imprinting?? Sweet zombie Jebus. Jacob does express this impolite anger at the child at the end of his section, stalking down to murder the infant for what she has done to Bella. It is the cheapest, grossest cop-out ever that his anger is magicked away by some sort of gross sexual soul mating. (I know I've used gross twice in that sentence; sue me.) I'm way ZOMG about the idea of imprinting – this is what I get for not reading the previous books, where they explain why only guys imprint, and why imprinting isn't the most kinked idea ever. Edward's convenient mind-reading keeps telling us that Jacob only has pure thoughts for his infant bride, but come on. I suspect that Meyer pulled this stunt to give poor, rejected Jacob a consolation prize, and to keep him from running out of there. One of the last chapter speeches is about the power of family, and how family is choice and a bunch of other garbage. Jacob would never choose to stay with this family Meyer has constructed without magical duress. But with imprinting, now the cult can be complete! (And, though these thoughts lack coherence, I think there might be something in this imprinting business that is about sexual competition between mothers and daughters, and the uncomfortable reality that all children grow to become sexual beings. The imprinting puts a tight leash – pun intended – on the child's inevitable adolescent sexuality. Best mother ever!)
Bella goes full Mary Sue in the end, even her trademark clumsiness erased, her beauty perfected, her talents blooming into story-destroying weapons. She's so good at everything that she makes conflict impossible. (view spoiler)[I was sorely disappointed by the big “battle” with the Voltori, who succumb to her perfect motherhood in the most boring episode of Vampire Matlock ever. Which is super funny, because Alice's clairvoyance is obviously the real reason that any of that worked out, but that's the trouble with clairvoyant characters – they really know how to spoil a plot. I spent a fair amount of time laughing when Alice bails, and everyone is like, nooooes! That must mean we are dooooooomed!! Because, you know, there's no other good reason for a clairvoyant to head out on some super secret mission when there's a big throw-down on the horizon. Certainly she won't arrive at the perfect moment with some major trump card. That's not more likely at all. But Alice's decampment serves as grist for the emo mill, and without all the hand-wringing brought on by her leaving, there would be almost no emotional drama – clearly fake as it is – to the any of the boring, perfect proceedings leading up to the end. (hide spoiler)]
Much as the last section bored me to tears, at least when it wasn't grossing me out, I was zero to the bone on the last page. Bella and Edward's forever and evers to one another, the vision of this family locked into an unchanging perfect stasis, unable to sleep or dream, fundamentally cut off from the larger world, this hit me like a ton of ice. Good god, who wants this? Who aspires to shed every single vestige of their humanity in the attainment of domestic perfection? And having gotten there, who thinks this perfection is anything but a horrible nightmare? Edward was right at the first: an existence of unchanging perfection is no life at all. Throughout this book, the people in Bella's life disappear on by one: only a brief mention of her school friends at the wedding, then silence, her mother considered and then discarded again, her father brought in in the most ancillary way possible, the concerns of lives of the werewolves dropped after Jacob is neutered. Breaking Dawn is a chilling portrait of the most self-serving narcissism, that old Freudian saw about procreation as immortality turned monstrous in its perfection. I just went and tucked my kids into bed, and I feel fiercely in this moment how transitory their childhoods are, how precious it is that they grow and change, what a gift it is that we fight, and even that we inevitably die. It's quite a feat Meyer performed here, making me cozy up to my death while I tuck my kids in. Grief is the left hand of happiness, to misquote my beloved Ursula K Le Guin, and I hold my children with both hands. Anything else is as dishonest as it is awkward.
Cross-posted on Readerling(less)
136 likes · like · see review
Sparrow
Elizabeth wrote: "It's scary what she did to Wuthering Heights in book 3."
No, I love that. But, I don't love how boring the third book is.
Jan 20, 2013 04:44pm
No, I love that. But, I don't love how boring the third book is.
Jan 20, 2013 04:44pm
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Breaking Dawn just might be one of the worst books I have ever read. Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse can stand together as a fairly pleasing, lovable trio. Breaking Dawn seems almost unrelated to the series, like some crazed, over-the-top fan fiction. In the first three books, Stephenie Meyer creates this world of seemingly realistic magic – realistic because it is bound by explainable rules, and the characters within the world have retainable qualities from book to book. Though New Moon shows h...more
Breaking Dawn just might be one of the worst books I have ever read. Twilight, New Moon, and Eclipse can stand together as a fairly pleasing, lovable trio. Breaking Dawn seems almost unrelated to the series, like some crazed, over-the-top fan fiction. In the first three books, Stephenie Meyer creates this world of seemingly realistic magic – realistic because it is bound by explainable rules, and the characters within the world have retainable qualities from book to book. Though New Moon shows how utterly weak and pathetic Bella is sans Edward, it seems a natural progression of her needy personality that was introduced during the development of their relationship in Twilight. It seems as if in Breaking Dawn, Stephenie Meyer ran out of ideas for her characters or else decided to completely remake them and ignore the logistics she created for these magical creatures. It might as well have been named Breaking Rules.
First let’s start off with Bella’s personality. Though her aversion to the wedding ceremony is over-done and her self-deprecating attitude by this point is impossibly trite, it seems like the classic Bella. By the time she finishes her honeymoon with Edward, she has gone from being this average teenager who is in love enough to marry her boyfriend but doesn’t want to jump into a marriage for fear of being thought of as “small-town”, to a married, pregnant eighteen year old who is so intent upon keeping her incubus child that she is willing to die so that the thing can live. Oh, and she has also become somewhat reminiscent of a crazed sex-addict. She is annoyed that Edward wants to go out and explore the island with her, snorkeling and hiking and doing fun activities. She would rather just stay in the house and have sex all day, every day, for weeks at a time. That’s disgusting. Also defying any sort of logic is the fact that once she realizes she might be pregnant, it is confirmed by the fact that her stomach has a little bulge and she feels the baby kick. The five-day-old embryo. Right. It’s almost like Stephenie Meyer wanted to stuff five years of normal life into Edward and Bella’s magical existence for the sake of not having to write a fifth book. Although Bella’s pregnancy was a surprise to the vampire world, the event seemed utterly contrived. By the time I finished reading the honeymoon scene, I was having to shut the book to collect myself. I felt my mind had been violated, like Stephenie Meyer had just mind-raped me through nearly 100 pages. I had to force myself to continue reading. It only got worse.
I was annoyed that Stephenie decided to use a whole third of the book for Jacob’s perspective. What sort of structure is that? It’s just a lame excuse to develop the plot from an easier angle. It’s a total cop-out. Why even write a version of Twilight from Edward’s perspective if you can just throw in alternate perspectives wherever it makes things easier? Once Bella becomes pregnant, she ceases to be Bella. We see most of the pregnancy through Jacob’s eyes, and Bella’s stubbornness is annoying. I didn’t even feel compassion or sympathy for her. Edward speaks of it as a “thing”, Carlisle is afraid of it, they say it’s an incubus and not even a real infant, that it eats its way out of its mother’s womb, and yet Bella wants it, is willing to die for it. What? Since when did Bella want to be a mom? Since when did she not care about the whole “small town” image? She doesn’t seem to see how this child could complicate her life, much less end it. Plus, the thing grows at an alarming rate. Within a week or two, Bella’s stomach is large enough that she “cradles it” in her arms. This image disgusted me. First of all, I would rather not imagine a pregnant 18 year old, married or not. Second of all, the logistics of it bother me. Like oh, of course she gets through 9 months of pregnancy in roughly four weeks. Way to go Stephenie, it’s obvious you’re not anxious to speed the plot along or anything. Plus, with Bella’s personality it seems like she would have a hard time wrapping her head around the idea of impending motherhood, let alone be absolutely ready for it in four weeks’ time.
Then the birth – grotesque, disgusting. Edward biting open Bella’s womb to free the child. Um, sick? I can only hope the movie version of this saga ends with Twilight. I can't imagine them trying to dilute the honeymoon scene, let alone the birthing scene. I can just picture the awkward energy radiating in the theatre during a movie like this. I wouldn't be surprised if there were nothing but crickets at the end, moviegoers awkwardly shuffling out of the theatre, avoiding eye contact with those they came with. But moving on, how about the lovely celebrity-coupleish name they burden her with? Renesmee. Gag me. I wonder what Stephenie Meyer was even thinking. And to further her perverted, illogical tirade, Stephenie has Jacob imprint on the infant Renesmee. Wow, didn’t see that one coming. Of course, how perfect for Bella. She can have Jacob in her life AND have him be happy. Wow. Applause. Great solution. Not. I would rather he imprinted on Leah. That would have made much more sense.
Once Bella becomes a vampire, she continues to remain the exception to every rule while being utterly oblivious to the fact. Bella! You’re so under control! Really? I am? What? Bella! You are unusually graceful! Really? Was that jump good? Bella! Your mind can block everything out, you have super powers! And oh, you can conveniently use them to protect the ones you love! Really? Is that good? Am I being modest enough? Gag me. How convenient to the plot that Bella can skip over all the newborn vampire nonsense and just be herself. How convenient that her passions for Edward only intensify. Who needs human experiences? How convenient that Charlie gets to know the Cullens are not human. How convenient that he happily accepts that two months after giving his daughter away, he already has a grandchild the size of a 3 year old. Right. Because infant Renesmee is not nearly as interesting or cute as talking toddler Renesmee who appears to be a baby Einstein that prefers to “show” her thoughts rather than speak them. And suddenly Bella has the mental maturity of a 30 year old mother though she’s still an 18 year old who got pregnant four months ago and has a daughter who is progressing at least 5 times as fast as a normal infant. The whole plot line reminded me of a child who got bored playing the same old story with her Barbies and suddenly decided that Barbie and Ken were going to have a baby, and that baby was born and became a functioning member of the family within two minutes of play time.
I was a little hopeful when the Volturi arrived for what seemed to be an inevitable war. I recalled back to when Bella mentioned something about not being able to imagine the Cullens without their head, Carlisle. I thought for sure Carlisle would make some ultimate sacrifice to save Edward and Bella. At least one major casualty would have breathed some feeling into this book other than “everything is perfect because Bella and Edward defy every bit of logic.” But no. In true predictable fashion, Alice returns and saves the day. Bella grows some balls and radiates her “shield” over everyone. Pathetic Bella, the damsel in distress, the one who always had to be protected and saved, now the one protecting and saving everyone else. How convenient. No fighting occurs, Renesmee is assured a life of immortality and will conveniently grow up extra fast for Jacob. Bella and Edward live to have more sex. Everyone lives happily ever after.
(less)
First let’s start off with Bella’s personality. Though her aversion to the wedding ceremony is over-done and her self-deprecating attitude by this point is impossibly trite, it seems like the classic Bella. By the time she finishes her honeymoon with Edward, she has gone from being this average teenager who is in love enough to marry her boyfriend but doesn’t want to jump into a marriage for fear of being thought of as “small-town”, to a married, pregnant eighteen year old who is so intent upon keeping her incubus child that she is willing to die so that the thing can live. Oh, and she has also become somewhat reminiscent of a crazed sex-addict. She is annoyed that Edward wants to go out and explore the island with her, snorkeling and hiking and doing fun activities. She would rather just stay in the house and have sex all day, every day, for weeks at a time. That’s disgusting. Also defying any sort of logic is the fact that once she realizes she might be pregnant, it is confirmed by the fact that her stomach has a little bulge and she feels the baby kick. The five-day-old embryo. Right. It’s almost like Stephenie Meyer wanted to stuff five years of normal life into Edward and Bella’s magical existence for the sake of not having to write a fifth book. Although Bella’s pregnancy was a surprise to the vampire world, the event seemed utterly contrived. By the time I finished reading the honeymoon scene, I was having to shut the book to collect myself. I felt my mind had been violated, like Stephenie Meyer had just mind-raped me through nearly 100 pages. I had to force myself to continue reading. It only got worse.
I was annoyed that Stephenie decided to use a whole third of the book for Jacob’s perspective. What sort of structure is that? It’s just a lame excuse to develop the plot from an easier angle. It’s a total cop-out. Why even write a version of Twilight from Edward’s perspective if you can just throw in alternate perspectives wherever it makes things easier? Once Bella becomes pregnant, she ceases to be Bella. We see most of the pregnancy through Jacob’s eyes, and Bella’s stubbornness is annoying. I didn’t even feel compassion or sympathy for her. Edward speaks of it as a “thing”, Carlisle is afraid of it, they say it’s an incubus and not even a real infant, that it eats its way out of its mother’s womb, and yet Bella wants it, is willing to die for it. What? Since when did Bella want to be a mom? Since when did she not care about the whole “small town” image? She doesn’t seem to see how this child could complicate her life, much less end it. Plus, the thing grows at an alarming rate. Within a week or two, Bella’s stomach is large enough that she “cradles it” in her arms. This image disgusted me. First of all, I would rather not imagine a pregnant 18 year old, married or not. Second of all, the logistics of it bother me. Like oh, of course she gets through 9 months of pregnancy in roughly four weeks. Way to go Stephenie, it’s obvious you’re not anxious to speed the plot along or anything. Plus, with Bella’s personality it seems like she would have a hard time wrapping her head around the idea of impending motherhood, let alone be absolutely ready for it in four weeks’ time.
Then the birth – grotesque, disgusting. Edward biting open Bella’s womb to free the child. Um, sick? I can only hope the movie version of this saga ends with Twilight. I can't imagine them trying to dilute the honeymoon scene, let alone the birthing scene. I can just picture the awkward energy radiating in the theatre during a movie like this. I wouldn't be surprised if there were nothing but crickets at the end, moviegoers awkwardly shuffling out of the theatre, avoiding eye contact with those they came with. But moving on, how about the lovely celebrity-coupleish name they burden her with? Renesmee. Gag me. I wonder what Stephenie Meyer was even thinking. And to further her perverted, illogical tirade, Stephenie has Jacob imprint on the infant Renesmee. Wow, didn’t see that one coming. Of course, how perfect for Bella. She can have Jacob in her life AND have him be happy. Wow. Applause. Great solution. Not. I would rather he imprinted on Leah. That would have made much more sense.
Once Bella becomes a vampire, she continues to remain the exception to every rule while being utterly oblivious to the fact. Bella! You’re so under control! Really? I am? What? Bella! You are unusually graceful! Really? Was that jump good? Bella! Your mind can block everything out, you have super powers! And oh, you can conveniently use them to protect the ones you love! Really? Is that good? Am I being modest enough? Gag me. How convenient to the plot that Bella can skip over all the newborn vampire nonsense and just be herself. How convenient that her passions for Edward only intensify. Who needs human experiences? How convenient that Charlie gets to know the Cullens are not human. How convenient that he happily accepts that two months after giving his daughter away, he already has a grandchild the size of a 3 year old. Right. Because infant Renesmee is not nearly as interesting or cute as talking toddler Renesmee who appears to be a baby Einstein that prefers to “show” her thoughts rather than speak them. And suddenly Bella has the mental maturity of a 30 year old mother though she’s still an 18 year old who got pregnant four months ago and has a daughter who is progressing at least 5 times as fast as a normal infant. The whole plot line reminded me of a child who got bored playing the same old story with her Barbies and suddenly decided that Barbie and Ken were going to have a baby, and that baby was born and became a functioning member of the family within two minutes of play time.
I was a little hopeful when the Volturi arrived for what seemed to be an inevitable war. I recalled back to when Bella mentioned something about not being able to imagine the Cullens without their head, Carlisle. I thought for sure Carlisle would make some ultimate sacrifice to save Edward and Bella. At least one major casualty would have breathed some feeling into this book other than “everything is perfect because Bella and Edward defy every bit of logic.” But no. In true predictable fashion, Alice returns and saves the day. Bella grows some balls and radiates her “shield” over everyone. Pathetic Bella, the damsel in distress, the one who always had to be protected and saved, now the one protecting and saving everyone else. How convenient. No fighting occurs, Renesmee is assured a life of immortality and will conveniently grow up extra fast for Jacob. Bella and Edward live to have more sex. Everyone lives happily ever after.
(less)
116 likes · like · see review
oh yes, so VERY many spoilers! and unladylike language, sorry.
p.1: god help me. Here we go.
p.8: yep, Edward is already "going overboard" protecting Bella.
p.20: Her parents think it's a good idea for her to marry this weirdo at 18? They never think ANYTHING is a good idea.
p.33: Vampire babies! creepy! in a good way.
p.58: Jacob!
p.72: I swear Bella never just goes anywhere, you always have to DRAG her like a toddler.
p.85: I think they just had sex!! OMG!!
p.86: now of course we have to suffer throug...more oh yes, so VERY many spoilers! and unladylike language, sorry.
p.1: god help me. Here we go.
p.8: yep, Edward is already "going overboard" protecting Bella.
p.20: Her parents think it's a good idea for her to marry this weirdo at 18? They never think ANYTHING is a good idea.
p.33: Vampire babies! creepy! in a good way.
p.58: Jacob!
p.72: I swear Bella never just goes anywhere, you always have to DRAG her like a toddler.
p.85: I think they just had sex!! OMG!!
p.86: now of course we have to suffer through pages and pages of Edward being "guilty" which means basically he is an asshole.
p.108: she MAKES him have sex with her again, on their HONEYMOON. What a slut.
p.121: oh, please no. Don't be pregnant.
p.123: God dammit.
p.124: The pregnancy is already showing??? huh?
p.132: Edward cold and furious for the 1985674th time
p.145: Jacob POV!
p.151: This whole thing with the imprinting on a two-year old is just so fucked up.
p.153: However, "I'd seen Quil play peekaboo for an hour straight without getting bored"--HAHAHA!
p.174: Oh, I get it, the vampire baby grows really really fast! And also: EW.
p.177: Edward racked with guilt for the 7893902057th time.
p.274: GAH! It broke her rib?? I am NEVER getting pregnant. Ever.
p.327: Haha, she wants to name it either Edward (of course) or..."Renesmee"? Really? No, really??? Oh please let it be a girl.
p.333: I hope we see this red-haired chick again; I like her.
p.350: OH MY GOD. I know I said "ew" before, but I truly had no idea. EW EW EW EW EW.
p.353: I am still horrified, but HAHAHAHA! RENESMEE!! Awesome.
p.354: Wow, I really didn't think she would actually have Bella become a vampire!
p.360: THIS HAD BETTER NOT BE WHAT I THINK IT IS, THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY.
p.377: So apparently becoming a vampire feels like the worst torture imaginable, ever ever, but she's not going to scream because it might upset Edward.
p.405: Well, thank god she is able to find a flaw in her looks even though she's a goddesslike beauty now. It just wouldn't be Bella if she didn't hate herself.
p.409: Bella is the most gracefulest, loveliest vampire ever! She can even walk in heels now!
p.420: Really, she is THE MOST AMAZING VAMPIRE THAT HAS EVER EXISTED. Everyone is very impressed.
p.449: Oh lord, it WAS what I thought it was. Okay, so you are a teenage werewolf, and you form an unbreakable soul bond with the HALF-VAMPIRE DAUGHTER of the girl you have been in love with forever, who is ALSO now a vampire, and married to another vampire with disturbing rage issues, and you know you are going to marry this VAMPIRE BABY when she grows up (I suppose she doesn't have any choice in this), so how do you feel?
Fulfilled, apparently.
So what is going to happen to Leah now? I thought she and Jacob might end up together, but of course that wouldn't be DISTURBING ENOUGH, would it. Maybe she and her brother can get married or something.
p.463: Waitaminute. If Renesmee (heh!) is growing that fast, does that mean...?
Probably she'll be married to Jacob in a couple weeks.
p.474: Bella is relieved that even though she's a vampire now, her "essential core traits" of being a killjoy and a whiner are still intact.
p.485: Hee! Edward is a much better musician than the rest of his family, because while he was practicing, and reading about science, and learning languages, they were too busy having sex all the time! For real! Because vampires never get tired, so they never have to stop! Awesome.
Apparently they also can only have sex if they're married.
p.504: Coldly furious.
p.532: Coldly furious.
p.567: This entire series encapsulated in one sentence: "Wasn't shielding her more important than answering her questions?"
p.586: Wouldn't it make more sense to explain first, and THEN show them the vampire baby?
p.602: This whole thing about the different vampire powers is cool!
p.608: AWESOME. There is a fat vampire who is beautiful and the leader of her clan!
p.611: HAHAHA "someone is going to have to provide an index* (*see page 756)"
p.612: Huh. New word. "ferine" adj. Untamed; feral.
p.704: Coldly furious.
p.736: Oh good, so Renesmee should be able to get married by age seven and avoid the extra ten years of tedious waiting to be joined with her soulmate.
p.753: "No one's ever loved anyone as much as I love you." Yeah, yeah.
p.755: THE END. Okay, it started out pretty horrifyingly, but I enjoyed the last third or so. I still think Edward has no personality, but I guess that's what some people like.
And the red-haired girl never showed up again. Boo.
(less)
p.1: god help me. Here we go.
p.8: yep, Edward is already "going overboard" protecting Bella.
p.20: Her parents think it's a good idea for her to marry this weirdo at 18? They never think ANYTHING is a good idea.
p.33: Vampire babies! creepy! in a good way.
p.58: Jacob!
p.72: I swear Bella never just goes anywhere, you always have to DRAG her like a toddler.
p.85: I think they just had sex!! OMG!!
p.86: now of course we have to suffer throug...more oh yes, so VERY many spoilers! and unladylike language, sorry.
p.1: god help me. Here we go.
p.8: yep, Edward is already "going overboard" protecting Bella.
p.20: Her parents think it's a good idea for her to marry this weirdo at 18? They never think ANYTHING is a good idea.
p.33: Vampire babies! creepy! in a good way.
p.58: Jacob!
p.72: I swear Bella never just goes anywhere, you always have to DRAG her like a toddler.
p.85: I think they just had sex!! OMG!!
p.86: now of course we have to suffer through pages and pages of Edward being "guilty" which means basically he is an asshole.
p.108: she MAKES him have sex with her again, on their HONEYMOON. What a slut.
p.121: oh, please no. Don't be pregnant.
p.123: God dammit.
p.124: The pregnancy is already showing??? huh?
p.132: Edward cold and furious for the 1985674th time
p.145: Jacob POV!
p.151: This whole thing with the imprinting on a two-year old is just so fucked up.
p.153: However, "I'd seen Quil play peekaboo for an hour straight without getting bored"--HAHAHA!
p.174: Oh, I get it, the vampire baby grows really really fast! And also: EW.
p.177: Edward racked with guilt for the 7893902057th time.
p.274: GAH! It broke her rib?? I am NEVER getting pregnant. Ever.
p.327: Haha, she wants to name it either Edward (of course) or..."Renesmee"? Really? No, really??? Oh please let it be a girl.
p.333: I hope we see this red-haired chick again; I like her.
p.350: OH MY GOD. I know I said "ew" before, but I truly had no idea. EW EW EW EW EW.
p.353: I am still horrified, but HAHAHAHA! RENESMEE!! Awesome.
p.354: Wow, I really didn't think she would actually have Bella become a vampire!
p.360: THIS HAD BETTER NOT BE WHAT I THINK IT IS, THAT'S ALL I HAVE TO SAY.
p.377: So apparently becoming a vampire feels like the worst torture imaginable, ever ever, but she's not going to scream because it might upset Edward.
p.405: Well, thank god she is able to find a flaw in her looks even though she's a goddesslike beauty now. It just wouldn't be Bella if she didn't hate herself.
p.409: Bella is the most gracefulest, loveliest vampire ever! She can even walk in heels now!
p.420: Really, she is THE MOST AMAZING VAMPIRE THAT HAS EVER EXISTED. Everyone is very impressed.
p.449: Oh lord, it WAS what I thought it was. Okay, so you are a teenage werewolf, and you form an unbreakable soul bond with the HALF-VAMPIRE DAUGHTER of the girl you have been in love with forever, who is ALSO now a vampire, and married to another vampire with disturbing rage issues, and you know you are going to marry this VAMPIRE BABY when she grows up (I suppose she doesn't have any choice in this), so how do you feel?
Fulfilled, apparently.
So what is going to happen to Leah now? I thought she and Jacob might end up together, but of course that wouldn't be DISTURBING ENOUGH, would it. Maybe she and her brother can get married or something.
p.463: Waitaminute. If Renesmee (heh!) is growing that fast, does that mean...?
Probably she'll be married to Jacob in a couple weeks.
p.474: Bella is relieved that even though she's a vampire now, her "essential core traits" of being a killjoy and a whiner are still intact.
p.485: Hee! Edward is a much better musician than the rest of his family, because while he was practicing, and reading about science, and learning languages, they were too busy having sex all the time! For real! Because vampires never get tired, so they never have to stop! Awesome.
Apparently they also can only have sex if they're married.
p.504: Coldly furious.
p.532: Coldly furious.
p.567: This entire series encapsulated in one sentence: "Wasn't shielding her more important than answering her questions?"
p.586: Wouldn't it make more sense to explain first, and THEN show them the vampire baby?
p.602: This whole thing about the different vampire powers is cool!
p.608: AWESOME. There is a fat vampire who is beautiful and the leader of her clan!
p.611: HAHAHA "someone is going to have to provide an index* (*see page 756)"
p.612: Huh. New word. "ferine" adj. Untamed; feral.
p.704: Coldly furious.
p.736: Oh good, so Renesmee should be able to get married by age seven and avoid the extra ten years of tedious waiting to be joined with her soulmate.
p.753: "No one's ever loved anyone as much as I love you." Yeah, yeah.
p.755: THE END. Okay, it started out pretty horrifyingly, but I enjoyed the last third or so. I still think Edward has no personality, but I guess that's what some people like.
And the red-haired girl never showed up again. Boo.
(less)
There's a nice progression here, anyway. I lent Twilight to Cate-across-the-road; we gave her New Moon as a present, and she lent it back to me; most recently, she bought Eclipse, and I borrowed it after she finished. I suggested to her father that the logical next step would be for me to sneak in through her bedroom window and steal Breaking Dawn. I'm not entirely sure he found this funny.
____________________________________________
I am shocked, dismayed, not surprised at all to discover from U...more There's a nice progression here, anyway. I lent Twilight to Cate-across-the-road; we gave her New Moon as a present, and she lent it back to me; most recently, she bought Eclipse, and I borrowed it after she finished. I suggested to her father that the logical next step would be for me to sneak in through her bedroom window and steal Breaking Dawn. I'm not entirely sure he found this funny.
____________________________________________
I am shocked, dismayed, not surprised at all to discover from Usually Reliable Sources that the series has a happy ending. Let's recap. The story so far: Bella, a shy, bookish, unimaginative 17 year old girl who's never been kissed, falls in love with Edward, who once was human but has now been transformed, by means not fully explained in the books, into a robot-like being with an insatiable craving for blood. Edward tries to control every aspect of Bella's life, including stealing into her bedroom at night and watching over her while she sleeps. At one point, Edward leaves Bella abruptly, pushing her into a state of suicidal despair. He in fact believes, on rather slender evidence, that she has killed herself, and, rather than trying to find out whether she really is dead, decides to kill himself too. Bella, who has not died, is forced to risk her life a second time to save his.
The rest of this review is in my book What Pooh Might Have Said to Dante and Other Futile Speculations
(less)
____________________________________________
I am shocked, dismayed, not surprised at all to discover from U...more There's a nice progression here, anyway. I lent Twilight to Cate-across-the-road; we gave her New Moon as a present, and she lent it back to me; most recently, she bought Eclipse, and I borrowed it after she finished. I suggested to her father that the logical next step would be for me to sneak in through her bedroom window and steal Breaking Dawn. I'm not entirely sure he found this funny.
____________________________________________
I am shocked, dismayed, not surprised at all to discover from Usually Reliable Sources that the series has a happy ending. Let's recap. The story so far: Bella, a shy, bookish, unimaginative 17 year old girl who's never been kissed, falls in love with Edward, who once was human but has now been transformed, by means not fully explained in the books, into a robot-like being with an insatiable craving for blood. Edward tries to control every aspect of Bella's life, including stealing into her bedroom at night and watching over her while she sleeps. At one point, Edward leaves Bella abruptly, pushing her into a state of suicidal despair. He in fact believes, on rather slender evidence, that she has killed herself, and, rather than trying to find out whether she really is dead, decides to kill himself too. Bella, who has not died, is forced to risk her life a second time to save his.
The rest of this review is in my book What Pooh Might Have Said to Dante and Other Futile Speculations
(less)
67 likes · like · see review
Cecily
This review just goes to show that overanalsying, and taking things too seriously can be very productive and entertaining. Thanks.
updated May 06, 2013 03:29pm
updated May 06, 2013 03:29pm
Manny
I felt that most people hadn't done the necessary work. References to Shakespeare and Molière and a equation seemed like the bare minimum. I'm hoping...more
I felt that most people hadn't done the necessary work. References to Shakespeare and Molière and a equation seemed like the bare minimum. I'm hoping the professional lit-crit people will now get on board and show us how it really should be done.(less)
May 06, 2013 02:44pm
May 06, 2013 02:44pm
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
It kills me, but I didn't like Breaking Dawn. Disappointment doesn't even begin to cover my feelings, as invested as I have been in this series. It's an extreme reaction, but I have had extreme feelings about these books since I read the very first word.
I have loved these books because they took something that was total fantasy, the world of vampires, and made it seem realistic. I never thought I would have liked a vampire book, but this was never a vampire book to me, it was a book about Bella...more It kills me, but I didn't like Breaking Dawn. Disappointment doesn't even begin to cover my feelings, as invested as I have been in this series. It's an extreme reaction, but I have had extreme feelings about these books since I read the very first word.
I have loved these books because they took something that was total fantasy, the world of vampires, and made it seem realistic. I never thought I would have liked a vampire book, but this was never a vampire book to me, it was a book about Bella and Edward, and I loved reading about them, no matter what world they were in. This book, though, didn't continue it the realism. Just like Bella, this book totally lost its humanity, and lost all touch with the real world, which left it feeling much more sci-fi/fantasy than I am comfortable with. There was nothing real left in this book. No Forks. Just fantasy Cullen land in the woods, and right away, that was difficult to relate to.
Then there is canon. When a fictional world is established by an author, that author also comes up with rules for this world, establishes a history, sets up a way of life. Within the canon of the Twilight universe, it had been established that when a human is turned to a vampire, venom overtakes his or her body, that body is frozen in its current state, and that person has no more tears, no more bodily fluids. APPARENTLY, though, somehow SEMEN is immune to this, and, although it had never been mentioned before, ever, anywhere in the past 3 books, it is possible for a vampire man to get a female human pregnant. And, we find this out on Bella and Edward's honeymoon, when she gets knocked up with his baby. WTF.
I felt like I had been lied to by SM. She has been saying that vampires can't have babies in both her books and interviews for years, and all of a sudden she pulls the rug out from under us and says, "Oh! Just the females can't get pregnant! Didn't I mention that?!?" To me, this just screams plot device. This is where I first got pissed, and, sadly, this happens on page 127 of a 750 page book.
This leads a little bit into the focus of this book. I have loved the other 3 books because the main focus has always been on the relationship between Edward and Bella. When I heard that this book was going to begin with a wedding between these two, I was almost giddy! A whole book of Bella and Edward! Together! I love it! Well, shortly after they get married, they get pregnant, and the focus shifts from Bella and Edward to Bella and her baby. Yes, there are still Bella and Edward moments, but they are few and far between, and lack the passion and the fire that the other books had when describing their interactions.
So, I finally got my vampire sex, but it left me feeling a little cold. (Pun completely intended.) I can't help but feel that the sex totally overshadowed the intimacy and love in their relationship. Think about the intimate moments in the series. There are so many times when they aren't even doing anything, but you can feel the sparks flying off of the page. You can feel the intimacy and the passion between these two characters. This could have been taken to a new level when they were married and became even more intimate, even without describing the actual sex for her teenage audience. However, I feel like the passion was totally missing, and that made me sad. Don't get me wrong, I loved the headboard breaking, nightgown ripping, tantric vampire sex (well, the allusion to it, anyway, since it was all fade to black and then waking up the next day), but with so much focus on sex, we lost the passion of the other books.
Another thing lost, with Bella's priorities shifting to baby, is Edward. Where was my beloved Edward in this book? I feel like he was relegated to secondary character status, where his only job was to freak out or bone Bella. Where was the brooding, dazzling vampire I fell in love with? I knew that, once Bella was changed, he would no longer be so conflicted, since he can now truly be himself with her. I was very excited to possibly see Edward let loose a little bit, to just enjoy being with his hot vampire wife. It was there a little bit, we saw hints of it, but it was all secondary to the baby.
In addition, I think SM lost sight of her target audience. These books are written for a young adult crowd. How many 15-year-olds can relate to the unconditional love a mother has for her child? They can relate to falling in love for the first time, losing your first love, or choosing between two guys. They can't relate to wanting to keep a baby that's killing you, and then loving it unconditionally. It loses a lot of its relatablity with this pregnancy / motherhood aspect thrown in so close to the end of the series. And OMG the baby. It's name is Renesemee. Do I need to say anything else?
Then Jacob imprints on Bella and Edward's half-vampire baby. Some people are irritated by the implied pedophilia. I'm fine with that, and it was introduced in Eclipse with Quil and Claire, so it's easier to accept. It's more that it's Bella's baby, and, even more than that, it's the fact that, just like the baby in general, the whole thing screams plot device. Hmmm...how can we keep Jacob in the story once Bella and Edward get married? I know, he can imprint on their kid! Then he can still provide lighthearted comedy and witty banter! Yay!
Speaking of things that don't make sense-the characters. My beloved Cullens. Where and who were you? I feel like one of the strengths of the first 3 books was the development of the characters, specifically the Cullens. It seems like SM has always put the character development first, and then used those characters to drive the plot. This book, it seems, was so plot heavy that the characters suffered as a result. Hardly any of them seemed true to what we have learned about them thus far. Even Alice, one of the most charming and entertaining characters in the series was reduced to a completely one-dimensional background element...Alice likes to shop.The only character who was true to himself was Emmett, and without his one-liners about Bella and Edward's sex life I might have been crying over the total demise of the Cullens I have grown to love.
The whole thing, honestly, felt like someone else wrote it. I've seen lots of reviews that compare this book to fanfic. I don't read fanfic, but I can totally see this comparison. It's as if someone read the first 3 books and tried to imitate SM's style to create an ending for these characters, but, since this person was not the original author, there is plot disconnect, there is character disconnect, nothing seems to line up 100%. If you look at the first3 books, there is fluidity, but then this one, I don't know where the heck it comes from. Something is off.
This issue of continuity brings me to one of my major problems. I have always liked how SM has dealt with the theme of choice in her novels. Bella has had to face many important choices through each of the books, and she has realized that with each of these choices comes sacrifice. If she wants Edward, she has to give up Jacob. If she wants the Cullens, she has to give up Charlie and Renee. If she wants immortality, she has to give up her humanity. This has been a solid theme that has been addressed in each of the books, and it really came to a head in Eclipse. In fact, SM addresses this in her FAQ for Eclipse:
Q. What is the most pivotal plot development that happens in Eclipse?
A. In both Twilight and New Moon, Bella commits to becoming a vampire without once really examining what price she'll pay. In Eclipse, Bella fully comprehends that price. And then she chooses to pay it. Every aspect of the novel revolves around this point, every back story, every relationship, every moment of action
So, we would assume that, because she has made her choice at the end of Eclipse, this book would deal with the consequences behind her choices. You know, those sacrifices that have been looming since book one? Right? Wrong. Bella gets IT ALL. She gets everything she ever wanted, and never has to make a single sacrifice, never has to pay a single price. She gets Edward. She gets Jacob. (Since he has imprinted on her daughter, he gets to stay in her life forever). She gets immortality. She gets a baby. She gets the Cullens. She gets Charlie. (Who conveniently accepts their don't ask, don't tell policy...) She gets to be a kick-ass vampire. She gets to pass the newborn stage totally. She gets to be beautiful and graceful. She gets to save the day. SHE LOSES NOTHING.
Now, don't get me wrong. I am all about a happy ending. I wanted nothing more than for Bella and Edward to love happily ever after. What I am upset about is the fact that this theme of choice and sacrifice has been dominant since the beginning of the series and it just gets abandoned in this last book. It rings so false with everything else that has happened until this point, and I had such a hard time swallowing it. We end up with this deus ex machina ending that leaves us all blindsided; everything is wrapped up in a perfect bow, but it was all so forced, so contrived.
I know that SM loves her characters, and that is the problem. I think this book/ending was TOTALLY self-indulgent. I'm not the only fan who is upset with the way it ended and the way things went, even though it was a happy ending, which pretty much everyone was rooting for!
In the end, she gave ALL of the characters EVERYTHING they wanted, because she loved them so much. No one lost anything. It's not just Bella who didn't have to make any sacrifices-no one did. Not one character. Even Rosalie kinda got a baby to take care of. She loved them so much that she wasn't willing to take any risks with them. So, by giving them everything, she is the one who had to sacrifice. That sacrifice was the fluidity from the other books and the realism of the story she had set up in the other 3 stories.(less)
I have loved these books because they took something that was total fantasy, the world of vampires, and made it seem realistic. I never thought I would have liked a vampire book, but this was never a vampire book to me, it was a book about Bella...more It kills me, but I didn't like Breaking Dawn. Disappointment doesn't even begin to cover my feelings, as invested as I have been in this series. It's an extreme reaction, but I have had extreme feelings about these books since I read the very first word.
I have loved these books because they took something that was total fantasy, the world of vampires, and made it seem realistic. I never thought I would have liked a vampire book, but this was never a vampire book to me, it was a book about Bella and Edward, and I loved reading about them, no matter what world they were in. This book, though, didn't continue it the realism. Just like Bella, this book totally lost its humanity, and lost all touch with the real world, which left it feeling much more sci-fi/fantasy than I am comfortable with. There was nothing real left in this book. No Forks. Just fantasy Cullen land in the woods, and right away, that was difficult to relate to.
Then there is canon. When a fictional world is established by an author, that author also comes up with rules for this world, establishes a history, sets up a way of life. Within the canon of the Twilight universe, it had been established that when a human is turned to a vampire, venom overtakes his or her body, that body is frozen in its current state, and that person has no more tears, no more bodily fluids. APPARENTLY, though, somehow SEMEN is immune to this, and, although it had never been mentioned before, ever, anywhere in the past 3 books, it is possible for a vampire man to get a female human pregnant. And, we find this out on Bella and Edward's honeymoon, when she gets knocked up with his baby. WTF.
I felt like I had been lied to by SM. She has been saying that vampires can't have babies in both her books and interviews for years, and all of a sudden she pulls the rug out from under us and says, "Oh! Just the females can't get pregnant! Didn't I mention that?!?" To me, this just screams plot device. This is where I first got pissed, and, sadly, this happens on page 127 of a 750 page book.
This leads a little bit into the focus of this book. I have loved the other 3 books because the main focus has always been on the relationship between Edward and Bella. When I heard that this book was going to begin with a wedding between these two, I was almost giddy! A whole book of Bella and Edward! Together! I love it! Well, shortly after they get married, they get pregnant, and the focus shifts from Bella and Edward to Bella and her baby. Yes, there are still Bella and Edward moments, but they are few and far between, and lack the passion and the fire that the other books had when describing their interactions.
So, I finally got my vampire sex, but it left me feeling a little cold. (Pun completely intended.) I can't help but feel that the sex totally overshadowed the intimacy and love in their relationship. Think about the intimate moments in the series. There are so many times when they aren't even doing anything, but you can feel the sparks flying off of the page. You can feel the intimacy and the passion between these two characters. This could have been taken to a new level when they were married and became even more intimate, even without describing the actual sex for her teenage audience. However, I feel like the passion was totally missing, and that made me sad. Don't get me wrong, I loved the headboard breaking, nightgown ripping, tantric vampire sex (well, the allusion to it, anyway, since it was all fade to black and then waking up the next day), but with so much focus on sex, we lost the passion of the other books.
Another thing lost, with Bella's priorities shifting to baby, is Edward. Where was my beloved Edward in this book? I feel like he was relegated to secondary character status, where his only job was to freak out or bone Bella. Where was the brooding, dazzling vampire I fell in love with? I knew that, once Bella was changed, he would no longer be so conflicted, since he can now truly be himself with her. I was very excited to possibly see Edward let loose a little bit, to just enjoy being with his hot vampire wife. It was there a little bit, we saw hints of it, but it was all secondary to the baby.
In addition, I think SM lost sight of her target audience. These books are written for a young adult crowd. How many 15-year-olds can relate to the unconditional love a mother has for her child? They can relate to falling in love for the first time, losing your first love, or choosing between two guys. They can't relate to wanting to keep a baby that's killing you, and then loving it unconditionally. It loses a lot of its relatablity with this pregnancy / motherhood aspect thrown in so close to the end of the series. And OMG the baby. It's name is Renesemee. Do I need to say anything else?
Then Jacob imprints on Bella and Edward's half-vampire baby. Some people are irritated by the implied pedophilia. I'm fine with that, and it was introduced in Eclipse with Quil and Claire, so it's easier to accept. It's more that it's Bella's baby, and, even more than that, it's the fact that, just like the baby in general, the whole thing screams plot device. Hmmm...how can we keep Jacob in the story once Bella and Edward get married? I know, he can imprint on their kid! Then he can still provide lighthearted comedy and witty banter! Yay!
Speaking of things that don't make sense-the characters. My beloved Cullens. Where and who were you? I feel like one of the strengths of the first 3 books was the development of the characters, specifically the Cullens. It seems like SM has always put the character development first, and then used those characters to drive the plot. This book, it seems, was so plot heavy that the characters suffered as a result. Hardly any of them seemed true to what we have learned about them thus far. Even Alice, one of the most charming and entertaining characters in the series was reduced to a completely one-dimensional background element...Alice likes to shop.The only character who was true to himself was Emmett, and without his one-liners about Bella and Edward's sex life I might have been crying over the total demise of the Cullens I have grown to love.
The whole thing, honestly, felt like someone else wrote it. I've seen lots of reviews that compare this book to fanfic. I don't read fanfic, but I can totally see this comparison. It's as if someone read the first 3 books and tried to imitate SM's style to create an ending for these characters, but, since this person was not the original author, there is plot disconnect, there is character disconnect, nothing seems to line up 100%. If you look at the first3 books, there is fluidity, but then this one, I don't know where the heck it comes from. Something is off.
This issue of continuity brings me to one of my major problems. I have always liked how SM has dealt with the theme of choice in her novels. Bella has had to face many important choices through each of the books, and she has realized that with each of these choices comes sacrifice. If she wants Edward, she has to give up Jacob. If she wants the Cullens, she has to give up Charlie and Renee. If she wants immortality, she has to give up her humanity. This has been a solid theme that has been addressed in each of the books, and it really came to a head in Eclipse. In fact, SM addresses this in her FAQ for Eclipse:
Q. What is the most pivotal plot development that happens in Eclipse?
A. In both Twilight and New Moon, Bella commits to becoming a vampire without once really examining what price she'll pay. In Eclipse, Bella fully comprehends that price. And then she chooses to pay it. Every aspect of the novel revolves around this point, every back story, every relationship, every moment of action
So, we would assume that, because she has made her choice at the end of Eclipse, this book would deal with the consequences behind her choices. You know, those sacrifices that have been looming since book one? Right? Wrong. Bella gets IT ALL. She gets everything she ever wanted, and never has to make a single sacrifice, never has to pay a single price. She gets Edward. She gets Jacob. (Since he has imprinted on her daughter, he gets to stay in her life forever). She gets immortality. She gets a baby. She gets the Cullens. She gets Charlie. (Who conveniently accepts their don't ask, don't tell policy...) She gets to be a kick-ass vampire. She gets to pass the newborn stage totally. She gets to be beautiful and graceful. She gets to save the day. SHE LOSES NOTHING.
Now, don't get me wrong. I am all about a happy ending. I wanted nothing more than for Bella and Edward to love happily ever after. What I am upset about is the fact that this theme of choice and sacrifice has been dominant since the beginning of the series and it just gets abandoned in this last book. It rings so false with everything else that has happened until this point, and I had such a hard time swallowing it. We end up with this deus ex machina ending that leaves us all blindsided; everything is wrapped up in a perfect bow, but it was all so forced, so contrived.
I know that SM loves her characters, and that is the problem. I think this book/ending was TOTALLY self-indulgent. I'm not the only fan who is upset with the way it ended and the way things went, even though it was a happy ending, which pretty much everyone was rooting for!
In the end, she gave ALL of the characters EVERYTHING they wanted, because she loved them so much. No one lost anything. It's not just Bella who didn't have to make any sacrifices-no one did. Not one character. Even Rosalie kinda got a baby to take care of. She loved them so much that she wasn't willing to take any risks with them. So, by giving them everything, she is the one who had to sacrifice. That sacrifice was the fluidity from the other books and the realism of the story she had set up in the other 3 stories.(less)
100 likes · like · see review
Sabrina
Fantastic review. . . I feel the same as you - thanks for your thoughts.
Jan 31, 2010 08:01am
Jan 31, 2010 08:01am
Oct 13, 2011
Lissa
added it
This is a direct quote from Seth, Stephenie Meyer's brother and the person who runs her website.
"In an attempt to keep the books clean and not make young girls think about things that they don't need to think about, no other book mentioned anything about reproductive systems."
Hear that, girls?
You're not supposed to think about things.
Especially not sex.
Don't think about sex. Ever.
Or you will be thinking about things you shouldn't be thinking about.
Don't think about boys. Thinking about boys lead...more This is a direct quote from Seth, Stephenie Meyer's brother and the person who runs her website.
"In an attempt to keep the books clean and not make young girls think about things that they don't need to think about, no other book mentioned anything about reproductive systems."
Hear that, girls?
You're not supposed to think about things.
Especially not sex.
Don't think about sex. Ever.
Or you will be thinking about things you shouldn't be thinking about.
Don't think about boys. Thinking about boys leads to thinking about holding hands and kissing, which leads to thinking about sex, which is bad.
Don't wonder about how babies are made and don't ever wonder where you came from. Clearly you popped out of your mother's vajayjay the instant your parents thought about having a child, like in The Sims 1. No sex involved.
Don't wonder if your parents still have sex. (Newsflash: most parents keep having sex after their kids are born).
And girls, especially don't think about other girls in the way you should be thinking about boys. I mean... don't think about boys in that way, either. If you must think about the thing you're not supposed to think about, it should be about boys. But still, don't think about it.
In fact, don't even read these books, because they include boys, and a girl who tries to seduce a boy who - like all good boys - won't do that thing you're not allowed to think about with her. Because he's the perfect boy. But don't think about him.
Because you don't need to think about sex. You don't need to be prepared. You don't need to know about protection. You don't need to know that some boys only want you for the feelings the magic baby-maker between your legs gives him. This whole 'sex' thing? It just happens. Magically. And it doesn't hurt and you'll never regret it and you'll be happy and content forever.
But, uh... don't think about that. You don't need to know about it.
And when that baby pops out nine months later (not like a week, which we have been led to believe) and you don't turn into a vampire, don't be disappointed. When you struggle to be a young single mum with a baby that actually takes work to look after and you're not an OMGAMAZINGGODDESSVAMPIRE supermodel, remember: you're not supposed to think about it.
And for god's sake, don't read these books and then fantasise about having sex with the boy, because even though Meyer wrote him to be the 'perfect' boy, and he's based on one of her own wet dreams, and she has been quoted as saying if Edward or Jacob showed up on her doorstep she would leave her loving husband and three children for either one of them... remember: SEX IS BAD. DON'T THINK ABOUT IT.(less)
"In an attempt to keep the books clean and not make young girls think about things that they don't need to think about, no other book mentioned anything about reproductive systems."
Hear that, girls?
You're not supposed to think about things.
Especially not sex.
Don't think about sex. Ever.
Or you will be thinking about things you shouldn't be thinking about.
Don't think about boys. Thinking about boys lead...more This is a direct quote from Seth, Stephenie Meyer's brother and the person who runs her website.
"In an attempt to keep the books clean and not make young girls think about things that they don't need to think about, no other book mentioned anything about reproductive systems."
Hear that, girls?
You're not supposed to think about things.
Especially not sex.
Don't think about sex. Ever.
Or you will be thinking about things you shouldn't be thinking about.
Don't think about boys. Thinking about boys leads to thinking about holding hands and kissing, which leads to thinking about sex, which is bad.
Don't wonder about how babies are made and don't ever wonder where you came from. Clearly you popped out of your mother's vajayjay the instant your parents thought about having a child, like in The Sims 1. No sex involved.
Don't wonder if your parents still have sex. (Newsflash: most parents keep having sex after their kids are born).
And girls, especially don't think about other girls in the way you should be thinking about boys. I mean... don't think about boys in that way, either. If you must think about the thing you're not supposed to think about, it should be about boys. But still, don't think about it.
In fact, don't even read these books, because they include boys, and a girl who tries to seduce a boy who - like all good boys - won't do that thing you're not allowed to think about with her. Because he's the perfect boy. But don't think about him.
Because you don't need to think about sex. You don't need to be prepared. You don't need to know about protection. You don't need to know that some boys only want you for the feelings the magic baby-maker between your legs gives him. This whole 'sex' thing? It just happens. Magically. And it doesn't hurt and you'll never regret it and you'll be happy and content forever.
But, uh... don't think about that. You don't need to know about it.
And when that baby pops out nine months later (not like a week, which we have been led to believe) and you don't turn into a vampire, don't be disappointed. When you struggle to be a young single mum with a baby that actually takes work to look after and you're not an OMGAMAZINGGODDESSVAMPIRE supermodel, remember: you're not supposed to think about it.
And for god's sake, don't read these books and then fantasise about having sex with the boy, because even though Meyer wrote him to be the 'perfect' boy, and he's based on one of her own wet dreams, and she has been quoted as saying if Edward or Jacob showed up on her doorstep she would leave her loving husband and three children for either one of them... remember: SEX IS BAD. DON'T THINK ABOUT IT.(less)
Page 318 - Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?
Okay, it's always been obvious that the only things Smeyer finds important in life are marriage and babies, the younger the better, but what the fuck, y'all. I am beyond disgusted at this. (edit - this is kind of unclear, mostly because at the time of typing I was too angry t...more Page 318 - Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?
Okay, it's always been obvious that the only things Smeyer finds important in life are marriage and babies, the younger the better, but what the fuck, y'all. I am beyond disgusted at this. (edit - this is kind of unclear, mostly because at the time of typing I was too angry to think properly. I'm disgusted at the statement that women who cannot have children are less than female, with the implication that the only point of being a woman is reproduction. Which is bullshit. Families are great and all, but they are not the be-all-end-all of my double X's, and sterility does not change one's femininity. Blah.)
Yeah, finished - well, meh. Writing was better, but by the end none of the characters were recognizable except Alice - ILU ALICE - and Bella became even more of a Mary Sue than she had been before, which I think managed to break part of the universe. Death Baby was annoying, Edward and Jacob both came over all woobie, and the ending was the BIGGEST FUCKING COP-OUT. You mean to tell me you collect sixty vampires and nearly twenty werewolves-that-aren't in one place, and there isn't so much as a schoolyard rumble? Come on.
Things I liked - uh, Leah. Leah and Seth. Rock on, Clearwaters. And...yeah, that's pretty much it.
These books are crack and have always been crack, but this was the bad crack.
OH ONE MORE THING, THIS MADE ME REALLY MAD - What is it with English majors and fantasy writers trying to justify their fuckery with science? That whole mess with chromosomes, and how vampires have 25 and humans have 23 which is why Alice can see their futures but she can't see werewolves' futures because they have 24, and the reason she can't see the bb is because it has the average of Bella and Edward - what the hell is that? Seriously? Other than complete and utter pseudo-intellectual laziness? It'd be better if she'd just handwaved it - honestly, it is a novel about vampires and werewolves; it's FINE if you just throw up your hands and blithely say "Magic!" So WHY MUST YOU MAKE THE BIOLOGISTS CRY?
original review: Look, I need more vampire crackfic, okay? Don't judge.
Predictions, for the lulz:
-Jacob dies (for max angst) or imprints on non-Bella (because I don't think Meyer has the guts to kill anyone off, honestly)
-Angela, as joked about in previous books, is revealed to be a witch
-Alice is even more awesome and bribes Edward into giving her a Ferrari
-Bella doesn't go vamp due to angst
-Edward magically turns human and he and Bella get maaaaaarried and live as happy mundanes for the rest of their days
-lots of angst and hopefully LOTS of sparkling, because, seriously.
Why are we reading these books again?
SPARKLY. GODDAMN. VAMPIRES.(less)
Okay, it's always been obvious that the only things Smeyer finds important in life are marriage and babies, the younger the better, but what the fuck, y'all. I am beyond disgusted at this. (edit - this is kind of unclear, mostly because at the time of typing I was too angry t...more Page 318 - Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?
Okay, it's always been obvious that the only things Smeyer finds important in life are marriage and babies, the younger the better, but what the fuck, y'all. I am beyond disgusted at this. (edit - this is kind of unclear, mostly because at the time of typing I was too angry to think properly. I'm disgusted at the statement that women who cannot have children are less than female, with the implication that the only point of being a woman is reproduction. Which is bullshit. Families are great and all, but they are not the be-all-end-all of my double X's, and sterility does not change one's femininity. Blah.)
Yeah, finished - well, meh. Writing was better, but by the end none of the characters were recognizable except Alice - ILU ALICE - and Bella became even more of a Mary Sue than she had been before, which I think managed to break part of the universe. Death Baby was annoying, Edward and Jacob both came over all woobie, and the ending was the BIGGEST FUCKING COP-OUT. You mean to tell me you collect sixty vampires and nearly twenty werewolves-that-aren't in one place, and there isn't so much as a schoolyard rumble? Come on.
Things I liked - uh, Leah. Leah and Seth. Rock on, Clearwaters. And...yeah, that's pretty much it.
These books are crack and have always been crack, but this was the bad crack.
OH ONE MORE THING, THIS MADE ME REALLY MAD - What is it with English majors and fantasy writers trying to justify their fuckery with science? That whole mess with chromosomes, and how vampires have 25 and humans have 23 which is why Alice can see their futures but she can't see werewolves' futures because they have 24, and the reason she can't see the bb is because it has the average of Bella and Edward - what the hell is that? Seriously? Other than complete and utter pseudo-intellectual laziness? It'd be better if she'd just handwaved it - honestly, it is a novel about vampires and werewolves; it's FINE if you just throw up your hands and blithely say "Magic!" So WHY MUST YOU MAKE THE BIOLOGISTS CRY?
original review: Look, I need more vampire crackfic, okay? Don't judge.
Predictions, for the lulz:
-Jacob dies (for max angst) or imprints on non-Bella (because I don't think Meyer has the guts to kill anyone off, honestly)
-Angela, as joked about in previous books, is revealed to be a witch
-Alice is even more awesome and bribes Edward into giving her a Ferrari
-Bella doesn't go vamp due to angst
-Edward magically turns human and he and Bella get maaaaaarried and live as happy mundanes for the rest of their days
-lots of angst and hopefully LOTS of sparkling, because, seriously.
Why are we reading these books again?
SPARKLY. GODDAMN. VAMPIRES.(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I'll preface by saying that I did enjoy this book - I love the story overall, and the characters, and the premise and all of that. I don't have a problem with Bella, and it was funny seeing her through Jacob's biased eyes - on the contrary, I like Bella. I wouldn't be able to read these books if I didn't. What really bothers me most about this series are the obsessive fans.
This is one of those series where the obsessive fans take the story away from the author, writing their own versions, coming...more I'll preface by saying that I did enjoy this book - I love the story overall, and the characters, and the premise and all of that. I don't have a problem with Bella, and it was funny seeing her through Jacob's biased eyes - on the contrary, I like Bella. I wouldn't be able to read these books if I didn't. What really bothers me most about this series are the obsessive fans.
This is one of those series where the obsessive fans take the story away from the author, writing their own versions, coming up with their own theories and all the rest of it. I don't begrudge them that, but what really annoys me is when they say that Meyer has it all wrong, that that's not what vampires are like, and on and on. I came across a few discussions over what would happen in this book, which I tried to avoid, but people were coming up with all sorts of things: about babies, about what Bella's special gift would be, about the wedding and so on.
I would have thought that this book would have completely satisfied people, but from the glimpses I've caught (much to my annoyance), a lot of fans seem almost scornful of how things panned out. Maybe it's because there was too much of a build-up, like with the last Harry Potter book, and it creates an anti-climax. I'd like to pat myself on the back for avoiding that feeling, by steering clear of all the online discussions - though it's hard on Goodreads, because people's comments pop up on your updates page. Grrr.
The pregnancy took me by surprise, but I loved it. It was plausible, it was scary, and by switching Point-of-View to Jacob in the middle there (an ingenious device), we not only get a more fleshed-out perspective of that period, a wise move, but it makes Bella's life more fragile, precarious, uncertain. For a while there I was extremely worried that she wouldn't survive. Edward's pain was so very real, and really got to me.
The baby device is quite common in fantasy - the baby that will save the world or the baby that will unite people and so on. Here it was much more personal though, and I appreciated that. Renesmee was a little too perfect, but her bizarre nature balanced it enough that she wasn't too sickly sweet. I wasn't surprised at Jacob imprinting with her - and it was certainly an effective way of handling that pesky problem! I wonder, though, was Bella less interesting when she no longer had to worry herself over two men?
As for the other characters, apart from Bella and Jacob, they're very much in the background, which was rather disappointing. Playing their typical support roles, it felt a little rushed at times, almost like Meyer's heart wasn't really in it - as I understand it she wrote this book because her publisher wanted her to, like with the previous two; Twilight was meant to be a stand-alone novel in the beginning. [I've since learnt from a friend who saw her interviewed that she had this planned out from the beginning and had to convince her publishers to let her do it in four books. But it still felt a bit rushed and half-hearted in places.]
Is it just me or is Jacob Meyer's favourite? He gets an awful lot of airtime here, which gives us a chance to feel really comfortable with him, and he has a nice irreverent tone, but it still leaves many of the other characters thinly sketched. Even Edward, I never really feel like we break through his mystery and outward charisma to the person beneath. Bella sees him as a kind of idol, and as such, he's almost inhuman (ha ha). His emotions come across, but not so much his reasoning, or motivations. I'm not sure, maybe that's not it exactly, but I always want more Edward and want I'm given just doesn't satisfy me.
Now, it was always going to be tricky, writing Bella as a vampire. All her main quirks as a human are gone - the clumsiness, the blushing, the sweetness - which Meyer always used to define her character, so I was really pleased at how she managed to make Bella a convincing vampire while still retaining enough to make her familiar. Her voice doesn't really change, but her actions have. She's much less vulnerable, and that's bound to change anyone. But her body language has been altered, and her confidence too. It worked well. Edward, too, no longer treated her like a fragile human but effortlessly shifted his perspective and treated her as more of a partner, less as an eccentric pet.
The climax was less climactic than the other books, but the fact that it didn't end on violence like the previous book gave the end of the series the right kind of ending, a peaceful one. Bella's special ability made sense, and while it's not visibly impressive, it's certainly very useful and fits her character: always trying to protect others.
Is it just me or do all the books start with Bella in a car? I can't remember how the others started and I didn't get a chance to have a look, but it seemed like they do. If they do, it's an interesting comfort zone.
I love Meyer's version of the vampiric species - it's original and very well fleshed out, and differs at important points from the more generic, Anne Rice version, making them much more attractive, less vulnerable creatures.
This is an addictive series, with as many detractors as fans, and with as much hoo-ha as Harry Potter. They're not as well written as the Harry Potter books, but they're nothing to cringe over either - you don't read them for the prose, but for the story, which is emotionally intense and very, very addictive. It's a classic love story, it's just that the circumstances are a little different.
So, I guess the long and the short of it is, I loved the book, yet it wasn't wholly satisfying, like there was something missing, some part of character development maybe, or maybe I'm just wishing Edward was more fleshed out, now that Bella's like him and he's no longer an alien species. I can't quite put my finger on it. But there were lots of surprises, and the plot was well-structured in three parts, three distinct stages, with all the emotional gut-punching I've come to expect from Meyer. Truly, she puts me through the wringer like Diana Gabaldon - and for this alone I will always love these books (yes, I like the feeling of being put through the proverbial emotional wringer!). It's also a great romance, though too much time was spent telling us of the bond between Bella and Edward, and not enough time showing us. Perhaps that was what bugged me?(less)
This is one of those series where the obsessive fans take the story away from the author, writing their own versions, coming...more I'll preface by saying that I did enjoy this book - I love the story overall, and the characters, and the premise and all of that. I don't have a problem with Bella, and it was funny seeing her through Jacob's biased eyes - on the contrary, I like Bella. I wouldn't be able to read these books if I didn't. What really bothers me most about this series are the obsessive fans.
This is one of those series where the obsessive fans take the story away from the author, writing their own versions, coming up with their own theories and all the rest of it. I don't begrudge them that, but what really annoys me is when they say that Meyer has it all wrong, that that's not what vampires are like, and on and on. I came across a few discussions over what would happen in this book, which I tried to avoid, but people were coming up with all sorts of things: about babies, about what Bella's special gift would be, about the wedding and so on.
I would have thought that this book would have completely satisfied people, but from the glimpses I've caught (much to my annoyance), a lot of fans seem almost scornful of how things panned out. Maybe it's because there was too much of a build-up, like with the last Harry Potter book, and it creates an anti-climax. I'd like to pat myself on the back for avoiding that feeling, by steering clear of all the online discussions - though it's hard on Goodreads, because people's comments pop up on your updates page. Grrr.
The pregnancy took me by surprise, but I loved it. It was plausible, it was scary, and by switching Point-of-View to Jacob in the middle there (an ingenious device), we not only get a more fleshed-out perspective of that period, a wise move, but it makes Bella's life more fragile, precarious, uncertain. For a while there I was extremely worried that she wouldn't survive. Edward's pain was so very real, and really got to me.
The baby device is quite common in fantasy - the baby that will save the world or the baby that will unite people and so on. Here it was much more personal though, and I appreciated that. Renesmee was a little too perfect, but her bizarre nature balanced it enough that she wasn't too sickly sweet. I wasn't surprised at Jacob imprinting with her - and it was certainly an effective way of handling that pesky problem! I wonder, though, was Bella less interesting when she no longer had to worry herself over two men?
As for the other characters, apart from Bella and Jacob, they're very much in the background, which was rather disappointing. Playing their typical support roles, it felt a little rushed at times, almost like Meyer's heart wasn't really in it - as I understand it she wrote this book because her publisher wanted her to, like with the previous two; Twilight was meant to be a stand-alone novel in the beginning. [I've since learnt from a friend who saw her interviewed that she had this planned out from the beginning and had to convince her publishers to let her do it in four books. But it still felt a bit rushed and half-hearted in places.]
Is it just me or is Jacob Meyer's favourite? He gets an awful lot of airtime here, which gives us a chance to feel really comfortable with him, and he has a nice irreverent tone, but it still leaves many of the other characters thinly sketched. Even Edward, I never really feel like we break through his mystery and outward charisma to the person beneath. Bella sees him as a kind of idol, and as such, he's almost inhuman (ha ha). His emotions come across, but not so much his reasoning, or motivations. I'm not sure, maybe that's not it exactly, but I always want more Edward and want I'm given just doesn't satisfy me.
Now, it was always going to be tricky, writing Bella as a vampire. All her main quirks as a human are gone - the clumsiness, the blushing, the sweetness - which Meyer always used to define her character, so I was really pleased at how she managed to make Bella a convincing vampire while still retaining enough to make her familiar. Her voice doesn't really change, but her actions have. She's much less vulnerable, and that's bound to change anyone. But her body language has been altered, and her confidence too. It worked well. Edward, too, no longer treated her like a fragile human but effortlessly shifted his perspective and treated her as more of a partner, less as an eccentric pet.
The climax was less climactic than the other books, but the fact that it didn't end on violence like the previous book gave the end of the series the right kind of ending, a peaceful one. Bella's special ability made sense, and while it's not visibly impressive, it's certainly very useful and fits her character: always trying to protect others.
Is it just me or do all the books start with Bella in a car? I can't remember how the others started and I didn't get a chance to have a look, but it seemed like they do. If they do, it's an interesting comfort zone.
I love Meyer's version of the vampiric species - it's original and very well fleshed out, and differs at important points from the more generic, Anne Rice version, making them much more attractive, less vulnerable creatures.
This is an addictive series, with as many detractors as fans, and with as much hoo-ha as Harry Potter. They're not as well written as the Harry Potter books, but they're nothing to cringe over either - you don't read them for the prose, but for the story, which is emotionally intense and very, very addictive. It's a classic love story, it's just that the circumstances are a little different.
So, I guess the long and the short of it is, I loved the book, yet it wasn't wholly satisfying, like there was something missing, some part of character development maybe, or maybe I'm just wishing Edward was more fleshed out, now that Bella's like him and he's no longer an alien species. I can't quite put my finger on it. But there were lots of surprises, and the plot was well-structured in three parts, three distinct stages, with all the emotional gut-punching I've come to expect from Meyer. Truly, she puts me through the wringer like Diana Gabaldon - and for this alone I will always love these books (yes, I like the feeling of being put through the proverbial emotional wringer!). It's also a great romance, though too much time was spent telling us of the bond between Bella and Edward, and not enough time showing us. Perhaps that was what bugged me?(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Dear lord. "Didn't like it" is a terrible, terrible understatement. I cannot believe I wasted my time with this book. The deeper and deeper I got into the absurdness of it all, I realized what it reminded me of: a bad fan fiction.
Let's start with the *shudder*...pregnancy. GAH! GAH GAH GAH! What was Meyer THINKING, making it possible for Bella to be pregnant? What the hell was she thinking?
Now that I read Meyer's statements more carefully, I realize that she never actually said it was impossible...more Dear lord. "Didn't like it" is a terrible, terrible understatement. I cannot believe I wasted my time with this book. The deeper and deeper I got into the absurdness of it all, I realized what it reminded me of: a bad fan fiction.
Let's start with the *shudder*...pregnancy. GAH! GAH GAH GAH! What was Meyer THINKING, making it possible for Bella to be pregnant? What the hell was she thinking?
Now that I read Meyer's statements more carefully, I realize that she never actually said it was impossible for a male vampire to impregnate a human girl, just that a female vampire couldn't bear children. I guess we (the readers) just jumped to conclusions with that.
But regardless, I have never thought of Bella as particularly maternal. So imagine my surprise when the fried chicken she makes one day nauseates her! My reaction: "...No! It can't be! She can't be! It's impossible, damn it!"
And then when she realizes she's late, here's my reaction: "NOOOOOOOOOOO! NO! NO NO NO NO NO! WHAT THE HELL!"
Yes, it's that bad.
And then shortly after it goes into "Book Two," which is Jacob's point of view.
Now, I hated Jacob. Almost. I guess it was more dislike, since I don't usually hate things. But anyways, I was expecting his view to be boring and disappointing.
But as we got further into it, I started to have a better understanding of him. It was refreshing to get a glimpse into his mind, to see his feelings. I have always been one of Team Edward before now, so imagine my surprise when I realize that Jacob is now one of my favorite characters!
Seth and Leah are great characters too. Leah really developed--all she needed was to be able to push away from Sam. I have always liked Leah, truthfully. But even though I liked her, I could never truthfully say she had a great personality. Breaking Dawn changed that.
And in Jacob's point of view, we see how badly the pregnancy is affecting Bella--this is also a good part of the book. Too often in fan fiction I see pregnant!Bella having a blissful time. But the pain and misery of it in Breaking Dawn is absolutely wonderful. A new take on it, I thought, and my opinion of the book increased as I got to that part.
But then the book just HAS to go to Bella's point of view again. And shortly after she gives birth (also plenty of pain there), she is dying, and Edward has to change her into a vampire quickly. I can't say I like the circumstances for the change, but alright. Fine. But the disappointment comes during the change.
She mentions the pain, the monstrous fire that keeps licking at her skin and causing her pain at every moment. But she fails to describe it well--after a while, she's grown used to it. How exactly do you get used to being in a fire? I just don't get that. And one other fact--she stays still throughout the whole transformation. She should be screaming, thrashing about. How did she suddenly become this "strong, silent type?"
Don't worry...one of the biggest disappointments is yet to come.
She wakes up, and all her senses have been magnified: the entire world looks different. That's not the disappointment, though.
The big disappointment is that there is barely any mention of thirst. Know why? Because she has this super-self-control that allows her to completely skip the typical YEARS of savageness, the newborn stage! Yes, everyone. She is that awesome.
She has become a Mary-Sue. If you don't know what that is, go look it up on Wikipedia now.
Is that not enough to convince you of her Sue-ness? Well, as if that's not enough, a little later she discovers that she can protect people with her mind!
But that's for later. Right now, let's rewind a little bit.
Remember Bella's kid? Turns out it's a girl. What's her name?
Renesmee.
You heard right. Renesmee.
Try pronouncing that. I can think of a lot of mispronunciations: REEN-smee, REH-neh-smee, etc etc. Correct pronunciation: ruh-NEZ-may. Combo of Renee and Esme.
And as if that were not enough, she's nicknamed after the loch ness monster.
And as if THAT, were not enough, Jacob imprints on her.
Ugh. I mean, most of us want him to eventually get over Bella, right? But the way Meyer does it? It's like, POOF! The moment he sees Renesmee, Bella vanishes! She was never there!
It's laughable.
Using such an easy way of getting rid of Jacob. Ugh. Meyer could've at least spent time on the solution.
Meanwhile, a series of events which I don't feel like explaining happen which lead the Volturi to come to try to kill Nessie. Nessie is Renesmee, if you can't figure it out. Concerned, the Cullens gather seventeen other freaking vampires as witnesses. Don't ask me for what, I don't feel like explaining.
And obviously all of these vampires get along, even though most of them prey on humans and a whole neighborhood of them live a few miles away.
And as if that weren't enough, almost all of them have superpowers, completely deflating one of Meyer's earlier claims.
So here they are, all gathered, when suddenly the Volturi get convinced that Nessie is not a threat and they all leave peacefully--though not without killing Irina, who ratted all of them out but did so on a false claim.
And then they lived happily ever after.
Yes, that really happened. The title of the last chapter was even "Happily Ever After."
Personally, I would've liked to see a fight at the end.
But then, even after all this, you still say, "But at least Alice was there to make the story better, right?"
Well, no. She was barely there for anything. Which takes away a lot of the series' appeal.
And while we're on the topic of characters, may I also add that no one was acting in-character?
And while we're on the topic of out-of-character-ness, I would also like to say that Charlie found out about werewolves and that the Cullens weren't human (he doesn't know they're vampires, just that they aren't human), but guess what? He barely cares about it! Who would've thought?
Remember earlier, when I said this was like a bad fan fiction? Let's weigh all the characteristics.
Everything that happened in cliche fan fiction happened here, including:
- Pregnant Bella
- Stupid names
- OOC-ness (Out Of Character, if you can't figure it out)
- The commonness of gifted vampires
- Bella's self-control gift
- Two gifts for Bella
- Jacob imprinting
- Charlie knowing the secret
I'm sure there's more, but I don't want to think a lot.
Please don't read this.
August 30th, 2008 UPDATE:
Okay, so I've gotten over the initial shock of the book. I'm not going to write another review, because I'm still in denial that the book was actually okay. So I'm just going to say that I respect it. I'm never, ever going to like it, of course. But I respect it.
October 4th, 2008 UPDATE:
I changed my mind. I hate this book again with a passion. I no longer respect it or Meyer.(less)
Let's start with the *shudder*...pregnancy. GAH! GAH GAH GAH! What was Meyer THINKING, making it possible for Bella to be pregnant? What the hell was she thinking?
Now that I read Meyer's statements more carefully, I realize that she never actually said it was impossible...more Dear lord. "Didn't like it" is a terrible, terrible understatement. I cannot believe I wasted my time with this book. The deeper and deeper I got into the absurdness of it all, I realized what it reminded me of: a bad fan fiction.
Let's start with the *shudder*...pregnancy. GAH! GAH GAH GAH! What was Meyer THINKING, making it possible for Bella to be pregnant? What the hell was she thinking?
Now that I read Meyer's statements more carefully, I realize that she never actually said it was impossible for a male vampire to impregnate a human girl, just that a female vampire couldn't bear children. I guess we (the readers) just jumped to conclusions with that.
But regardless, I have never thought of Bella as particularly maternal. So imagine my surprise when the fried chicken she makes one day nauseates her! My reaction: "...No! It can't be! She can't be! It's impossible, damn it!"
And then when she realizes she's late, here's my reaction: "NOOOOOOOOOOO! NO! NO NO NO NO NO! WHAT THE HELL!"
Yes, it's that bad.
And then shortly after it goes into "Book Two," which is Jacob's point of view.
Now, I hated Jacob. Almost. I guess it was more dislike, since I don't usually hate things. But anyways, I was expecting his view to be boring and disappointing.
But as we got further into it, I started to have a better understanding of him. It was refreshing to get a glimpse into his mind, to see his feelings. I have always been one of Team Edward before now, so imagine my surprise when I realize that Jacob is now one of my favorite characters!
Seth and Leah are great characters too. Leah really developed--all she needed was to be able to push away from Sam. I have always liked Leah, truthfully. But even though I liked her, I could never truthfully say she had a great personality. Breaking Dawn changed that.
And in Jacob's point of view, we see how badly the pregnancy is affecting Bella--this is also a good part of the book. Too often in fan fiction I see pregnant!Bella having a blissful time. But the pain and misery of it in Breaking Dawn is absolutely wonderful. A new take on it, I thought, and my opinion of the book increased as I got to that part.
But then the book just HAS to go to Bella's point of view again. And shortly after she gives birth (also plenty of pain there), she is dying, and Edward has to change her into a vampire quickly. I can't say I like the circumstances for the change, but alright. Fine. But the disappointment comes during the change.
She mentions the pain, the monstrous fire that keeps licking at her skin and causing her pain at every moment. But she fails to describe it well--after a while, she's grown used to it. How exactly do you get used to being in a fire? I just don't get that. And one other fact--she stays still throughout the whole transformation. She should be screaming, thrashing about. How did she suddenly become this "strong, silent type?"
Don't worry...one of the biggest disappointments is yet to come.
She wakes up, and all her senses have been magnified: the entire world looks different. That's not the disappointment, though.
The big disappointment is that there is barely any mention of thirst. Know why? Because she has this super-self-control that allows her to completely skip the typical YEARS of savageness, the newborn stage! Yes, everyone. She is that awesome.
She has become a Mary-Sue. If you don't know what that is, go look it up on Wikipedia now.
Is that not enough to convince you of her Sue-ness? Well, as if that's not enough, a little later she discovers that she can protect people with her mind!
But that's for later. Right now, let's rewind a little bit.
Remember Bella's kid? Turns out it's a girl. What's her name?
Renesmee.
You heard right. Renesmee.
Try pronouncing that. I can think of a lot of mispronunciations: REEN-smee, REH-neh-smee, etc etc. Correct pronunciation: ruh-NEZ-may. Combo of Renee and Esme.
And as if that were not enough, she's nicknamed after the loch ness monster.
And as if THAT, were not enough, Jacob imprints on her.
Ugh. I mean, most of us want him to eventually get over Bella, right? But the way Meyer does it? It's like, POOF! The moment he sees Renesmee, Bella vanishes! She was never there!
It's laughable.
Using such an easy way of getting rid of Jacob. Ugh. Meyer could've at least spent time on the solution.
Meanwhile, a series of events which I don't feel like explaining happen which lead the Volturi to come to try to kill Nessie. Nessie is Renesmee, if you can't figure it out. Concerned, the Cullens gather seventeen other freaking vampires as witnesses. Don't ask me for what, I don't feel like explaining.
And obviously all of these vampires get along, even though most of them prey on humans and a whole neighborhood of them live a few miles away.
And as if that weren't enough, almost all of them have superpowers, completely deflating one of Meyer's earlier claims.
So here they are, all gathered, when suddenly the Volturi get convinced that Nessie is not a threat and they all leave peacefully--though not without killing Irina, who ratted all of them out but did so on a false claim.
And then they lived happily ever after.
Yes, that really happened. The title of the last chapter was even "Happily Ever After."
Personally, I would've liked to see a fight at the end.
But then, even after all this, you still say, "But at least Alice was there to make the story better, right?"
Well, no. She was barely there for anything. Which takes away a lot of the series' appeal.
And while we're on the topic of characters, may I also add that no one was acting in-character?
And while we're on the topic of out-of-character-ness, I would also like to say that Charlie found out about werewolves and that the Cullens weren't human (he doesn't know they're vampires, just that they aren't human), but guess what? He barely cares about it! Who would've thought?
Remember earlier, when I said this was like a bad fan fiction? Let's weigh all the characteristics.
Everything that happened in cliche fan fiction happened here, including:
- Pregnant Bella
- Stupid names
- OOC-ness (Out Of Character, if you can't figure it out)
- The commonness of gifted vampires
- Bella's self-control gift
- Two gifts for Bella
- Jacob imprinting
- Charlie knowing the secret
I'm sure there's more, but I don't want to think a lot.
Please don't read this.
August 30th, 2008 UPDATE:
Okay, so I've gotten over the initial shock of the book. I'm not going to write another review, because I'm still in denial that the book was actually okay. So I'm just going to say that I respect it. I'm never, ever going to like it, of course. But I respect it.
October 4th, 2008 UPDATE:
I changed my mind. I hate this book again with a passion. I no longer respect it or Meyer.(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I gave Breaking Dawn several days' worth of chances and it did nothing but stun, anger, and disappoint me. I enjoyed the first three books, despite how badly written and full of grammar mistakes and typos they were, because they were fun and exciting and took me away from a sucky year at college. Breaking Dawn, however, was so shockingly awful that I actually burst into hysterical laughter every time something drastic happened. I actually was unable to read it in one sitting like I wanted to bec...more
I gave Breaking Dawn several days' worth of chances and it did nothing but stun, anger, and disappoint me. I enjoyed the first three books, despite how badly written and full of grammar mistakes and typos they were, because they were fun and exciting and took me away from a sucky year at college. Breaking Dawn, however, was so shockingly awful that I actually burst into hysterical laughter every time something drastic happened. I actually was unable to read it in one sitting like I wanted to because my brain couldn't handle the ridiculousness for more than an hour at a time.
Not even considering how insanely bad the plot and writing were, the morals the book presents made me wonder how Stephenie even managed to get it published.
Moral #1: Marriage is easy. Bella doesn't have to pay for, take care of, or do anything in the way of keeping her marriage going. Not even touching on the whole Mr. Perfect issue.
Moral #2: The only thing worth staying alive for is sex. Bella never stopped considering her choice to become a vampire until she had sex with Edward and then suddenly wanted to hold back. Crying and begging him to screw her because her happy dream was over? Come on girl, have some pride. Pull yourself together, Bella. Sex isn't everything.
Moral #3: Women are only good for babymaking. "Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?" Are infertile females less female because they can't make babies and that's all women are good for? Stephenie thinks so.
Moral #4: All of your problems will be solved for you, so don't try to fix them. That year of wanting to drink human blood? Don't worry about it, you'll just skip it anyway. That baby who's killing you from the inside? Don't sweat it, Edward will just make you a vampire and then you'll be fine. Annoying cub boy won't fall out of love with you? Chill out, he'll imprint on your babies and then you won't ever have to worry about them getting in the way of your perfect love life again. And that leads into #5...
Moral #5: Pedophilia is okay! Just wait until they get old enough (or in Renesmee's case, wait until they're 6 years old because then they'll look old enough) and you're good to go.
I could keep going with the morals but I feel the need to touch on the fact that the ending was the biggest and most awful cop-out I could've imagined her writing. The other books had incredibly kickass, awesome action scenes that pulled me in and wouldn't let me stop reading. Breaking Dawn just built up and built up and then the Volturi just decided, whatever, no battle. Go home with your mutant baby. See you in six years when she tries to make babies with the werewolf and we get pissed off at you again. There were no struggles. There were a lot of solutions springing from midair and the preparation for sacrifices that were never made.
And that is why Breaking Dawn ruined the Twilight series for me. (less)
Not even considering how insanely bad the plot and writing were, the morals the book presents made me wonder how Stephenie even managed to get it published.
Moral #1: Marriage is easy. Bella doesn't have to pay for, take care of, or do anything in the way of keeping her marriage going. Not even touching on the whole Mr. Perfect issue.
Moral #2: The only thing worth staying alive for is sex. Bella never stopped considering her choice to become a vampire until she had sex with Edward and then suddenly wanted to hold back. Crying and begging him to screw her because her happy dream was over? Come on girl, have some pride. Pull yourself together, Bella. Sex isn't everything.
Moral #3: Women are only good for babymaking. "Had her body changed because she was a werewolf? Or had she become a werewolf because her body was wrong? The only female werewolf in the history of forever. Was that because she wasn't as female as she should be?" Are infertile females less female because they can't make babies and that's all women are good for? Stephenie thinks so.
Moral #4: All of your problems will be solved for you, so don't try to fix them. That year of wanting to drink human blood? Don't worry about it, you'll just skip it anyway. That baby who's killing you from the inside? Don't sweat it, Edward will just make you a vampire and then you'll be fine. Annoying cub boy won't fall out of love with you? Chill out, he'll imprint on your babies and then you won't ever have to worry about them getting in the way of your perfect love life again. And that leads into #5...
Moral #5: Pedophilia is okay! Just wait until they get old enough (or in Renesmee's case, wait until they're 6 years old because then they'll look old enough) and you're good to go.
I could keep going with the morals but I feel the need to touch on the fact that the ending was the biggest and most awful cop-out I could've imagined her writing. The other books had incredibly kickass, awesome action scenes that pulled me in and wouldn't let me stop reading. Breaking Dawn just built up and built up and then the Volturi just decided, whatever, no battle. Go home with your mutant baby. See you in six years when she tries to make babies with the werewolf and we get pissed off at you again. There were no struggles. There were a lot of solutions springing from midair and the preparation for sacrifices that were never made.
And that is why Breaking Dawn ruined the Twilight series for me. (less)
72 likes · like · see review
Klerine
Breaking Dawn is a terrible book, a terrible ending and sending out terrible messages. With the Harry Potter comparisons, I agree. its quite ironic th...more
Breaking Dawn is a terrible book, a terrible ending and sending out terrible messages. With the Harry Potter comparisons, I agree. its quite ironic that Harry Potter is shunned by Christian hypocrites, while Twilight has not been criticised much, despite being popular in the seller lists and written by a Mormon, too true.
I agree totally with your review Lauren, its sick, escpecially with the imprinting and a monster child. Urgh. If the child had some personality other than being perfecty perfect, maybe I'd have been less grossed out. One of the most poorly written series', though the first book isn't bad.
Really, the series and its author don't deserve the fame and money. Shows you how unfair live is.
(ps, I don't have anything against Christian groups, I was in fact in one of them, despite not being one)(less)
updated May 12, 2010 01:40am
I agree totally with your review Lauren, its sick, escpecially with the imprinting and a monster child. Urgh. If the child had some personality other than being perfecty perfect, maybe I'd have been less grossed out. One of the most poorly written series', though the first book isn't bad.
Really, the series and its author don't deserve the fame and money. Shows you how unfair live is.
(ps, I don't have anything against Christian groups, I was in fact in one of them, despite not being one)(less)
updated May 12, 2010 01:40am
Alex
You are so very very right. The ending was such a cope out and on a different subject ,isn't Edward like 100 years older than bella so it's like she's...more
You are so very very right. The ending was such a cope out and on a different subject ,isn't Edward like 100 years older than bella so it's like she's married to an old man in a way so creepy right!(less)
Aug 26, 2011 04:38pm
Aug 26, 2011 04:38pm
Aug 04, 2008
Meredith
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
a masochist and a moron
Recommended to Meredith by:
I'm going to shoot them in the face
Shelves:
ya
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I cannot describe the depth of my disappointment and disgust.
A baby?
A(nother) pedophil-esque imprint?
THIS IS WHAT WE WAITED FOR??
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
THIS WASN'T AN EPIC NOVEL, IT WAS A CONTAGIOUS RASH.
Everything we came to know (and presumably love) about the characters and the way their stories were told in the first three books completely sh*t the bed in this one. It was impossible to bond with any of the characters in the book, especially Edward, who became no more than a peripheral sperm...more I cannot describe the depth of my disappointment and disgust.
A baby?
A(nother) pedophil-esque imprint?
THIS IS WHAT WE WAITED FOR??
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
THIS WASN'T AN EPIC NOVEL, IT WAS A CONTAGIOUS RASH.
Everything we came to know (and presumably love) about the characters and the way their stories were told in the first three books completely sh*t the bed in this one. It was impossible to bond with any of the characters in the book, especially Edward, who became no more than a peripheral sperm donor.
Each plot development/"twist" was either so ridiclulous I wanted to scream, or so predictable that I had to groan. For this I rented a hotel room and stayed-up all night?
Oh, and BREAKING DAWN the MAJOR MOTION PICTURE......I just can't wait to see that gruesome Anne-Rice-Mayfair-Witch-Style-DIY-Cesaerean-Section brought to life on the big screen!!
Nah, how about a colonoscopy instead?
FOLLOW-UP:
Now that I've had a few days to calm down from my violent objections, I am ready to explain in detail why, I feel, this book sucked. In plot order:
1) The wedding was pretty good, but it was the only time we saw Angela, Mike, Jessica and Ben in the entire book. What happened? SM just kind of abandoned them. And Renee fell off the face of the earth, too. And I think that Bella's nearly non-existent reaction to meeting Tanya was out of character for her. The Bella we all know would have stressed it alot more.
2) The "sex" scene(s) irked me on so many levels. First of all, how does a vampire with no blood flowing through his body acheive an erection? I preferred SM's method of politely skirting the subject in the first three books to her method of making the subject increasingly more annoying and prevalent throughout BD. Emmett's comments and innuendos became almost as annoying as Bella's out of control libido. She can resist the bloodlust but not the sex lust...Is she a vampire or a porn star?
3) The pregnancy sent me over the edge. How does a vampire with no seminal fluids impregnate a woman? Bella's 2-month transition from high school senior to wife and mother was too difficult to swallow....and I was a young wife and mother myself.
4) Rosalie. We already hated her and making her into a Nazi midwife didn't help.
5)The birth. OMFG WHAT WAS THAT???? If I had read that before I had kids I would have scheduled myself for a tubal ligation the next day.
6) The name Renesme is so awful that everytime I looked at it (6 million times over) I choked on it. She couldn't have just used Carlie? It might have helped us bond with the beastly little mutant.
7) Where did our Edward go? The object of 60 million readers' desires turned into a sulking and helpless sperm donor. THAT'S NOT SEXY.
8) Jacob had to be a pedophile? Even as a strong Team Edward supporter, I always loved Jacob just for being goofy and sweet and sincere (mostly) and all the good things about a 16 year old boy. Better off alone or with Leah than with (essentially) his ex-girlfriend's daugher. YUCK.
8) Bella's transition from super klutz to super hero was too much. Throwing the shield across the field to defeat Jane and Alec, the two biggest badasses in Italy? Oh, c'mon.
9) The battle with the Volturi was no battle at all. All of those vampires and wolves in one place and all they could do was kill Irina?
The story was too long and I don't think SM gave the characters their proper attention. It read SO much differently than the first three. We didn't have enough quality time with our old favorites...not enough of Alice after the wedding and definitely not enough sexy Edward.
She spent alot of time on the baby, but I found myself completely unable to bond with her....maybe because even Bella spent more time worrying about sex than she did about the baby. (Yeah, it's like that for all new mother's right?!?)(less)
A baby?
A(nother) pedophil-esque imprint?
THIS IS WHAT WE WAITED FOR??
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
THIS WASN'T AN EPIC NOVEL, IT WAS A CONTAGIOUS RASH.
Everything we came to know (and presumably love) about the characters and the way their stories were told in the first three books completely sh*t the bed in this one. It was impossible to bond with any of the characters in the book, especially Edward, who became no more than a peripheral sperm...more I cannot describe the depth of my disappointment and disgust.
A baby?
A(nother) pedophil-esque imprint?
THIS IS WHAT WE WAITED FOR??
ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
THIS WASN'T AN EPIC NOVEL, IT WAS A CONTAGIOUS RASH.
Everything we came to know (and presumably love) about the characters and the way their stories were told in the first three books completely sh*t the bed in this one. It was impossible to bond with any of the characters in the book, especially Edward, who became no more than a peripheral sperm donor.
Each plot development/"twist" was either so ridiclulous I wanted to scream, or so predictable that I had to groan. For this I rented a hotel room and stayed-up all night?
Oh, and BREAKING DAWN the MAJOR MOTION PICTURE......I just can't wait to see that gruesome Anne-Rice-Mayfair-Witch-Style-DIY-Cesaerean-Section brought to life on the big screen!!
Nah, how about a colonoscopy instead?
FOLLOW-UP:
Now that I've had a few days to calm down from my violent objections, I am ready to explain in detail why, I feel, this book sucked. In plot order:
1) The wedding was pretty good, but it was the only time we saw Angela, Mike, Jessica and Ben in the entire book. What happened? SM just kind of abandoned them. And Renee fell off the face of the earth, too. And I think that Bella's nearly non-existent reaction to meeting Tanya was out of character for her. The Bella we all know would have stressed it alot more.
2) The "sex" scene(s) irked me on so many levels. First of all, how does a vampire with no blood flowing through his body acheive an erection? I preferred SM's method of politely skirting the subject in the first three books to her method of making the subject increasingly more annoying and prevalent throughout BD. Emmett's comments and innuendos became almost as annoying as Bella's out of control libido. She can resist the bloodlust but not the sex lust...Is she a vampire or a porn star?
3) The pregnancy sent me over the edge. How does a vampire with no seminal fluids impregnate a woman? Bella's 2-month transition from high school senior to wife and mother was too difficult to swallow....and I was a young wife and mother myself.
4) Rosalie. We already hated her and making her into a Nazi midwife didn't help.
5)The birth. OMFG WHAT WAS THAT???? If I had read that before I had kids I would have scheduled myself for a tubal ligation the next day.
6) The name Renesme is so awful that everytime I looked at it (6 million times over) I choked on it. She couldn't have just used Carlie? It might have helped us bond with the beastly little mutant.
7) Where did our Edward go? The object of 60 million readers' desires turned into a sulking and helpless sperm donor. THAT'S NOT SEXY.
8) Jacob had to be a pedophile? Even as a strong Team Edward supporter, I always loved Jacob just for being goofy and sweet and sincere (mostly) and all the good things about a 16 year old boy. Better off alone or with Leah than with (essentially) his ex-girlfriend's daugher. YUCK.
8) Bella's transition from super klutz to super hero was too much. Throwing the shield across the field to defeat Jane and Alec, the two biggest badasses in Italy? Oh, c'mon.
9) The battle with the Volturi was no battle at all. All of those vampires and wolves in one place and all they could do was kill Irina?
The story was too long and I don't think SM gave the characters their proper attention. It read SO much differently than the first three. We didn't have enough quality time with our old favorites...not enough of Alice after the wedding and definitely not enough sexy Edward.
She spent alot of time on the baby, but I found myself completely unable to bond with her....maybe because even Bella spent more time worrying about sex than she did about the baby. (Yeah, it's like that for all new mother's right?!?)(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I'd like to start out this review with three simple words that pretty much give away my feelings for this particular story (for those of you who have no desire to read my rant).
I hated it.
My friend --who stayed up reading the night it came out -- called me very early the morning of the 2nd and told me quite a bit of the plot.
I was horrified.
I wasn't even going to read it until she threatened to gouge out my eyes with a plastic spork. Quite honestly, I'm starting to wish I'd agreed to the spork...more I'd like to start out this review with three simple words that pretty much give away my feelings for this particular story (for those of you who have no desire to read my rant).
I hated it.
My friend --who stayed up reading the night it came out -- called me very early the morning of the 2nd and told me quite a bit of the plot.
I was horrified.
I wasn't even going to read it until she threatened to gouge out my eyes with a plastic spork. Quite honestly, I'm starting to wish I'd agreed to the spork idea. I haven't even been able to finish reading it (not in the 'I'm-a-slow-reader' sort of way either... more in the 'I-have-to-take-a-break-every-few-pages-to-retain-my-sanity' kind of way)
I wont even go into the whole awful message stuff -- and there are quite a few awful messages. Truthfully, I'd be totally happy to overlook all the imprinting shit along with the married and pregnant at 18, the way Bella can't survive without a boyfriend (be it Edward or Jacob), or... well never-mind, you get the point. I'd overlook it, if the plot had been good. Quite frankly, calling all the nonsense in that book plot would be pushing it a little bit.
Now, I have no problem with Mrs. Meyer's writing style -- in fact, I think she's a very good writer. She has the potential of writing a great book if only she put more thought into her plot. I was kind of hoping that there'd be some big, dramatic plot tie-up -- like Harry Potter. JK Rowling had obviously thought about her plot -- in fact, the plot of all the stories came together for the ending. It was brilliant.
That was obviously not the case here. I felt almost like I was reading a bunch of half-hearted fan-fiction -- 600-plus pages at a time. None of the four books had much to do with each-other, save for the characters (scratch that, the characters might as well have been different people for all I recognized them in the end), and Bella's wish to have sex with Edward and then be turned into a vampire. I mean no offense to fan-fiction.
I read this book with very little expectation because I didn't much like the 2nd, or the 3rd installment of the series. Somehow, I still managed to be very disappointed. I can't even begin to imagine the utter horror of someone who'd actually expected it to be good.
Another one of my huge complaints: the Characterization. Where oh where did it go? We were getting some in the first book -- as in the character's actually seemed a bit like real people -- but it slowly began disappearing. You can't even relate to Bella because she's so... irritating/whiny/clingy/dependent/indecisive/totally unreal. Pick a word -- they all work.
My main complaint: the Short Cut -- and by that of course, I mean the baby. Because, admit it! The baby was just a way to wrap up the series and tie it with a pretty, red bow. Jacob gets his girlfriend (never-mind the fact that she's Bella's daughter and less then a year old), and Edward gets to turn Bella into a vampire, guilt-free. I can't even begin to express my unhappiness for this particular plot development.
I was shocked when I found out Bella was pregnant -- though, it was more of a 'Please shoot me now and spare me' kind of shocked. I honestly thought (hoped) that it wouldn't happen because it was so unrealistic. Hell, she didn't even try very hard to make it seem plausible. ::cries:: I wanted to see Bella freak out -- because come on! She's 18, just married, and has never expressed any desire to have children of any sort (much less mutated half vampire children). Add in the fact that the baby was totally unplanned and is slowly killing her... But nope, no biggie -- her heart just "swells to twice it's normal size" -- and here I'd hoped that that was the start of a heart attack or something.
Mrs. Meyer's totally screwed over her own rules -- from start she'd made it quite clear that vampires could NOT have children. Now, while I am aware that Bella isn't a vampire so ok, sure, it's possible that could work... she could have done way better. Couldn't they have introduced the possibility sooner? Like Charlisle could have brought it up? Or Edward could have worried about it? Then it would have seemed more realistic. The two sentences it used to explain the pregnancy revealed it as the desperate short-cut it was.
Also, I just have to say... Bella would NOT make a good mother. This is the girl who jumped off a bloody cliff just to hear her boyfriend's voice. Honestly, she should probably work on protecting that poor baby from herself. Perhaps it's lucky that Jacob imprinted on it? Maybe together they can work on not dropping it on it's head?
The name also needs to be mentioned (though I promise it will be briefly). Why would they name their daughter after the Loch Ness Monster? If it knew, I'm sure the poor thing would be insulted (the monster, not the kid).
I totally see the attraction of this series, it represents every teenager's dream romance -- I really wanted to like it, but Mrs. Meyer made it a bit difficult for me.. Every book became steadily worse -- and every single fan-fiction mistake can be found on the pages of this series, horribly enough. You know the author doesn't know their character well enough when the readers begin to complain about them being out of character.
I hate to rain on the parade and all that, but I really did dislike the book. It was slow and boring and the (very small) plot-line was much too drawn out for it to be anything but a painful read.
Promising... but very disappointing.
(less)
I hated it.
My friend --who stayed up reading the night it came out -- called me very early the morning of the 2nd and told me quite a bit of the plot.
I was horrified.
I wasn't even going to read it until she threatened to gouge out my eyes with a plastic spork. Quite honestly, I'm starting to wish I'd agreed to the spork...more I'd like to start out this review with three simple words that pretty much give away my feelings for this particular story (for those of you who have no desire to read my rant).
I hated it.
My friend --who stayed up reading the night it came out -- called me very early the morning of the 2nd and told me quite a bit of the plot.
I was horrified.
I wasn't even going to read it until she threatened to gouge out my eyes with a plastic spork. Quite honestly, I'm starting to wish I'd agreed to the spork idea. I haven't even been able to finish reading it (not in the 'I'm-a-slow-reader' sort of way either... more in the 'I-have-to-take-a-break-every-few-pages-to-retain-my-sanity' kind of way)
I wont even go into the whole awful message stuff -- and there are quite a few awful messages. Truthfully, I'd be totally happy to overlook all the imprinting shit along with the married and pregnant at 18, the way Bella can't survive without a boyfriend (be it Edward or Jacob), or... well never-mind, you get the point. I'd overlook it, if the plot had been good. Quite frankly, calling all the nonsense in that book plot would be pushing it a little bit.
Now, I have no problem with Mrs. Meyer's writing style -- in fact, I think she's a very good writer. She has the potential of writing a great book if only she put more thought into her plot. I was kind of hoping that there'd be some big, dramatic plot tie-up -- like Harry Potter. JK Rowling had obviously thought about her plot -- in fact, the plot of all the stories came together for the ending. It was brilliant.
That was obviously not the case here. I felt almost like I was reading a bunch of half-hearted fan-fiction -- 600-plus pages at a time. None of the four books had much to do with each-other, save for the characters (scratch that, the characters might as well have been different people for all I recognized them in the end), and Bella's wish to have sex with Edward and then be turned into a vampire. I mean no offense to fan-fiction.
I read this book with very little expectation because I didn't much like the 2nd, or the 3rd installment of the series. Somehow, I still managed to be very disappointed. I can't even begin to imagine the utter horror of someone who'd actually expected it to be good.
Another one of my huge complaints: the Characterization. Where oh where did it go? We were getting some in the first book -- as in the character's actually seemed a bit like real people -- but it slowly began disappearing. You can't even relate to Bella because she's so... irritating/whiny/clingy/dependent/indecisive/totally unreal. Pick a word -- they all work.
My main complaint: the Short Cut -- and by that of course, I mean the baby. Because, admit it! The baby was just a way to wrap up the series and tie it with a pretty, red bow. Jacob gets his girlfriend (never-mind the fact that she's Bella's daughter and less then a year old), and Edward gets to turn Bella into a vampire, guilt-free. I can't even begin to express my unhappiness for this particular plot development.
I was shocked when I found out Bella was pregnant -- though, it was more of a 'Please shoot me now and spare me' kind of shocked. I honestly thought (hoped) that it wouldn't happen because it was so unrealistic. Hell, she didn't even try very hard to make it seem plausible. ::cries:: I wanted to see Bella freak out -- because come on! She's 18, just married, and has never expressed any desire to have children of any sort (much less mutated half vampire children). Add in the fact that the baby was totally unplanned and is slowly killing her... But nope, no biggie -- her heart just "swells to twice it's normal size" -- and here I'd hoped that that was the start of a heart attack or something.
Mrs. Meyer's totally screwed over her own rules -- from start she'd made it quite clear that vampires could NOT have children. Now, while I am aware that Bella isn't a vampire so ok, sure, it's possible that could work... she could have done way better. Couldn't they have introduced the possibility sooner? Like Charlisle could have brought it up? Or Edward could have worried about it? Then it would have seemed more realistic. The two sentences it used to explain the pregnancy revealed it as the desperate short-cut it was.
Also, I just have to say... Bella would NOT make a good mother. This is the girl who jumped off a bloody cliff just to hear her boyfriend's voice. Honestly, she should probably work on protecting that poor baby from herself. Perhaps it's lucky that Jacob imprinted on it? Maybe together they can work on not dropping it on it's head?
The name also needs to be mentioned (though I promise it will be briefly). Why would they name their daughter after the Loch Ness Monster? If it knew, I'm sure the poor thing would be insulted (the monster, not the kid).
I totally see the attraction of this series, it represents every teenager's dream romance -- I really wanted to like it, but Mrs. Meyer made it a bit difficult for me.. Every book became steadily worse -- and every single fan-fiction mistake can be found on the pages of this series, horribly enough. You know the author doesn't know their character well enough when the readers begin to complain about them being out of character.
I hate to rain on the parade and all that, but I really did dislike the book. It was slow and boring and the (very small) plot-line was much too drawn out for it to be anything but a painful read.
Promising... but very disappointing.
(less)
53 likes · like · see review
Syl
Heh, your probably right... Seems like one of those books that you either like it, or you hate it. At least people are clear where they stand?
Getting...more Heh, your probably right... Seems like one of those books that you either like it, or you hate it. At least people are clear where they stand?
Getting along is always good -- I'd feel a bit stupid arguing with people (especially via reviews) over a book.
Yes, crack is a pretty effective description. Perhaps the pages are actually covered in some sort of addictive substance? (less)
Aug 04, 2008 04:46pm
Getting...more Heh, your probably right... Seems like one of those books that you either like it, or you hate it. At least people are clear where they stand?
Getting along is always good -- I'd feel a bit stupid arguing with people (especially via reviews) over a book.
Yes, crack is a pretty effective description. Perhaps the pages are actually covered in some sort of addictive substance? (less)
Aug 04, 2008 04:46pm
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
***DEFINITELY contains SPOILERS***
Sorry so long, but I had a lot to say about the end of one of my favorite series.
This is a hard one. Overall, I got what I wanted – The wedding, Bella’s change, Jacob imprinting, and minimal loss of life. It was the perfect fairy tale ending with a ‘happily ever after’. So I should be happy, right?
To begin with, I think the book was too crowded and rushed. It could have easily been 2 books, giving us so much more in every aspect. Everything was too neatly taken...more ***DEFINITELY contains SPOILERS***
Sorry so long, but I had a lot to say about the end of one of my favorite series.
This is a hard one. Overall, I got what I wanted – The wedding, Bella’s change, Jacob imprinting, and minimal loss of life. It was the perfect fairy tale ending with a ‘happily ever after’. So I should be happy, right?
To begin with, I think the book was too crowded and rushed. It could have easily been 2 books, giving us so much more in every aspect. Everything was too neatly taken apart and put back together, and I really think SM could have been more creative with that if she had more time and space for it. It just seemed a little surreal and disjointed. If she had some of these things planned all along, she really should have prepared her readers a little better. Honestly, this book didn’t feel like her writing; in fact, it felt a little shallow. However, there were a lot of surprises and twists, and I was on the edge of my seat throughout a few of the chapters, which is one reason I won't say it was bad.
Bella & Edward – Not enough romance…at least not once the honeymoon was over. Their relationship is my favorite part of the series and it just went forgotten in this book. Part of the reason I read this series is because of the ‘feeling’ I get when I do (you know what I mean), and that was lost after the first 200 pages or so. I’m so happy they got married and she was changed, but it stopped short there…and the rest of the book didn’t really seem to fit with the rest of the series because of this desertion.
Edward – Did he DO something to SM? I mean, I feel like she TOTALLY slacked on his character in this book! I always thought he was her favorite as well, but he was just not a strong character in this book at all. Edward is what made Twilight so ‘magical’ for me. He was mysterious, romantic, beautiful, clever, intelligent; he was everything a knight in shining armor should be. Edward stole my heart by the 4th chapter. So much of that was lost in BD. You almost find yourself feeling sorry for him for becoming Bella’s loyal lapdog. It just didn’t feel right.
Bella – The clumsy school girl turns perfect vampire in record time? Seriously? Where is the angst, sorrow, pain and sacrifice we were expecting? This is what made the love between Bella & Edward so fantastical, their willingness to sacrifice EVERYTHING for each other. Then there is no sacrifice? How is that fair. Everything was just too easy for Bella in this book. I realize now that Bella is SM’s favorite character, not Edward. Bella gets to have the love of her life, amazing human sex, a baby (and we didn’t have an inkling she WANTED to be a mother), and become a super powerful vamp with no ‘newborn’ stage at all (although I was happy to finally discover her immunity to the powers of others is actually a special talent of her own…even though she did gain control over it a little too quickly for a newborn vamp, it’s nice to have an explanation nonetheless). We should all be so lucky. It was very hard to get past how everything worked out so perfectly for Bella. Even the pain during her change was overshadowed by the fact she was capable of hiding it from Edward, she was that strong already. It was actually a little annoying, I guess. The conflict with Jacob is also easily repaired as he falls out of love with Bella the moment he realizes he has imprinted on her baby daughter. But as much as Bella can’t live without Jacob, this news isn’t good news for her; she’s upset that it’s worked out so perfectly for everyone. Like I said, a little annoying.
Renesmee - I actually liked the chapter of Renesmee’s birth the best. I was surprised, shocked, horrified, disgusted, absorbed, hopeful, worried, and much more. I actually felt SOMETHING, which is what was missing the most from this book compared to the others. I am in the minority, I think, in that I was happy to find out Bella was pregnant. Before I realized the fear Edward possessed over this unknown, I thought it would take a different direction. I should have known better. Either way, I still thought the surprise was a good one, and I didn’t focus on the irrationality of a vampire siring a child because, well, come on people, we’re talking fiction…fantasy…supernatural already, our minds should be open to all possibilities. I thought the explanation of why this was ‘possible’ was pretty believable. I also liked her special talent and how it was directly related to the talents of both her parents. However, I am NOT in the minority when I express the opinion that I despise the child’s name. Renesmee? Are you kidding me? Thank goodness Jacob nicknamed her ‘Nessie’ and everyone followed suit, so I had to read that name less. Why not Carlie? I mean, really!
Jacob – I actually liked Jacob more in this book than any other, I think. I was always ‘Team Edward’ when it came to Bella, but I still wanted Jacob to be happy. I kept hoping he would imprint on some nice girl and they would go double date with Bella & Edward. I even started to wonder if Leah was imprinting on Jacob and how that would work? I thought that would definitely be an interesting story line. But no. Things are tidied up nicely and Jacob imprints on Bella’s daughter. Are we supposed to believe this is why they cared about each other SO much, because of his already existent attachment to her unborn child? And now he will become their son-in-law. Does that seem weird to anyone else? I expected this once we found out Bella gave birth to a daughter, but it was still a bit disappointing. I think Jacob could have ended up happy without Bella in a much more pragmatic way, personally.
The Cullens – First I’ll say I missed Alice tremendously!!! I said before BD came out that someone had to die, it just had to happen, and I speculated it would be Rosalie (I was right that someone had to die, luckily I didn't care about Irina one tiny bit). I figured she would be the easiest loss for the readers to swallow. So I was definitely surprised at the more frontline role she actually played in this book, and disappointed that Alice disappeared for so long. I also wish there was more story around the Cullens helping Bella as a newborn. Having her get control so quickly and easily was actually disappointing. I was looking forward to the expanding roles of each Cullen family member helping her through that time with their different strengths. I also wish we’d had more of the other vampire tribes, I thought it was very interesting having them come together with different talents, histories and personalities. I go back to why this could have been two books, one giving the story of the wedding, the honeymoon, the baby, the change, and more of the newborn years…yes, I wanted years; another giving more of the story of these new tribes and the battle against the Volturi.
With all that being said, I want to reiterate that I did enjoy the book and I was very happy with the way it ended. I just wasn’t as pleased with the story leading up to my desired ending. I wanted the ‘happily ever after’, but I wanted it to be more supernatural/vampire/even horror and less ‘fairy tale’ I guess. I hope SM gives us more of our favorite characters though, and that she takes a little more time to do so.
(less)
Sorry so long, but I had a lot to say about the end of one of my favorite series.
This is a hard one. Overall, I got what I wanted – The wedding, Bella’s change, Jacob imprinting, and minimal loss of life. It was the perfect fairy tale ending with a ‘happily ever after’. So I should be happy, right?
To begin with, I think the book was too crowded and rushed. It could have easily been 2 books, giving us so much more in every aspect. Everything was too neatly taken...more ***DEFINITELY contains SPOILERS***
Sorry so long, but I had a lot to say about the end of one of my favorite series.
This is a hard one. Overall, I got what I wanted – The wedding, Bella’s change, Jacob imprinting, and minimal loss of life. It was the perfect fairy tale ending with a ‘happily ever after’. So I should be happy, right?
To begin with, I think the book was too crowded and rushed. It could have easily been 2 books, giving us so much more in every aspect. Everything was too neatly taken apart and put back together, and I really think SM could have been more creative with that if she had more time and space for it. It just seemed a little surreal and disjointed. If she had some of these things planned all along, she really should have prepared her readers a little better. Honestly, this book didn’t feel like her writing; in fact, it felt a little shallow. However, there were a lot of surprises and twists, and I was on the edge of my seat throughout a few of the chapters, which is one reason I won't say it was bad.
Bella & Edward – Not enough romance…at least not once the honeymoon was over. Their relationship is my favorite part of the series and it just went forgotten in this book. Part of the reason I read this series is because of the ‘feeling’ I get when I do (you know what I mean), and that was lost after the first 200 pages or so. I’m so happy they got married and she was changed, but it stopped short there…and the rest of the book didn’t really seem to fit with the rest of the series because of this desertion.
Edward – Did he DO something to SM? I mean, I feel like she TOTALLY slacked on his character in this book! I always thought he was her favorite as well, but he was just not a strong character in this book at all. Edward is what made Twilight so ‘magical’ for me. He was mysterious, romantic, beautiful, clever, intelligent; he was everything a knight in shining armor should be. Edward stole my heart by the 4th chapter. So much of that was lost in BD. You almost find yourself feeling sorry for him for becoming Bella’s loyal lapdog. It just didn’t feel right.
Bella – The clumsy school girl turns perfect vampire in record time? Seriously? Where is the angst, sorrow, pain and sacrifice we were expecting? This is what made the love between Bella & Edward so fantastical, their willingness to sacrifice EVERYTHING for each other. Then there is no sacrifice? How is that fair. Everything was just too easy for Bella in this book. I realize now that Bella is SM’s favorite character, not Edward. Bella gets to have the love of her life, amazing human sex, a baby (and we didn’t have an inkling she WANTED to be a mother), and become a super powerful vamp with no ‘newborn’ stage at all (although I was happy to finally discover her immunity to the powers of others is actually a special talent of her own…even though she did gain control over it a little too quickly for a newborn vamp, it’s nice to have an explanation nonetheless). We should all be so lucky. It was very hard to get past how everything worked out so perfectly for Bella. Even the pain during her change was overshadowed by the fact she was capable of hiding it from Edward, she was that strong already. It was actually a little annoying, I guess. The conflict with Jacob is also easily repaired as he falls out of love with Bella the moment he realizes he has imprinted on her baby daughter. But as much as Bella can’t live without Jacob, this news isn’t good news for her; she’s upset that it’s worked out so perfectly for everyone. Like I said, a little annoying.
Renesmee - I actually liked the chapter of Renesmee’s birth the best. I was surprised, shocked, horrified, disgusted, absorbed, hopeful, worried, and much more. I actually felt SOMETHING, which is what was missing the most from this book compared to the others. I am in the minority, I think, in that I was happy to find out Bella was pregnant. Before I realized the fear Edward possessed over this unknown, I thought it would take a different direction. I should have known better. Either way, I still thought the surprise was a good one, and I didn’t focus on the irrationality of a vampire siring a child because, well, come on people, we’re talking fiction…fantasy…supernatural already, our minds should be open to all possibilities. I thought the explanation of why this was ‘possible’ was pretty believable. I also liked her special talent and how it was directly related to the talents of both her parents. However, I am NOT in the minority when I express the opinion that I despise the child’s name. Renesmee? Are you kidding me? Thank goodness Jacob nicknamed her ‘Nessie’ and everyone followed suit, so I had to read that name less. Why not Carlie? I mean, really!
Jacob – I actually liked Jacob more in this book than any other, I think. I was always ‘Team Edward’ when it came to Bella, but I still wanted Jacob to be happy. I kept hoping he would imprint on some nice girl and they would go double date with Bella & Edward. I even started to wonder if Leah was imprinting on Jacob and how that would work? I thought that would definitely be an interesting story line. But no. Things are tidied up nicely and Jacob imprints on Bella’s daughter. Are we supposed to believe this is why they cared about each other SO much, because of his already existent attachment to her unborn child? And now he will become their son-in-law. Does that seem weird to anyone else? I expected this once we found out Bella gave birth to a daughter, but it was still a bit disappointing. I think Jacob could have ended up happy without Bella in a much more pragmatic way, personally.
The Cullens – First I’ll say I missed Alice tremendously!!! I said before BD came out that someone had to die, it just had to happen, and I speculated it would be Rosalie (I was right that someone had to die, luckily I didn't care about Irina one tiny bit). I figured she would be the easiest loss for the readers to swallow. So I was definitely surprised at the more frontline role she actually played in this book, and disappointed that Alice disappeared for so long. I also wish there was more story around the Cullens helping Bella as a newborn. Having her get control so quickly and easily was actually disappointing. I was looking forward to the expanding roles of each Cullen family member helping her through that time with their different strengths. I also wish we’d had more of the other vampire tribes, I thought it was very interesting having them come together with different talents, histories and personalities. I go back to why this could have been two books, one giving the story of the wedding, the honeymoon, the baby, the change, and more of the newborn years…yes, I wanted years; another giving more of the story of these new tribes and the battle against the Volturi.
With all that being said, I want to reiterate that I did enjoy the book and I was very happy with the way it ended. I just wasn’t as pleased with the story leading up to my desired ending. I wanted the ‘happily ever after’, but I wanted it to be more supernatural/vampire/even horror and less ‘fairy tale’ I guess. I hope SM gives us more of our favorite characters though, and that she takes a little more time to do so.
(less)
45 likes · like · see review
Lizzie
When you talk about Edward, you ave t realize that the core of his existence was dying for about three hundred pages. Then I have no clue what happene...more
When you talk about Edward, you ave t realize that the core of his existence was dying for about three hundred pages. Then I have no clue what happened!!
Their relationship was a bit lacking, but I'm glad that she kept it as clean as possible for the sake of young teens who ignore reviews and reviews and warnings and read it anyways! overall great review. Some pple focused to much on the negative and on the technical stuff. I'm happy someone realized a book can be good without it having a real plot. (less)
Dec 16, 2008 10:45pm
Their relationship was a bit lacking, but I'm glad that she kept it as clean as possible for the sake of young teens who ignore reviews and reviews and warnings and read it anyways! overall great review. Some pple focused to much on the negative and on the technical stuff. I'm happy someone realized a book can be good without it having a real plot. (less)
Dec 16, 2008 10:45pm
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I'm going to say right off the bat that this review contains spoilers.
Spoilers ahoy.
I'm not even sure where to start. Should I start with the contrived pregnancy? Should I start with the ridiculous name "Renesmee"? Should I start with Jacob imprinting on the vampire hybrid infant/toddler/whatever of the woman he loves? Or should I go right to the only really good part of the book, which was meeting all the different vampire clans, covens, and nomads, in preparation for a confrontation with the V...more I'm going to say right off the bat that this review contains spoilers.
Spoilers ahoy.
I'm not even sure where to start. Should I start with the contrived pregnancy? Should I start with the ridiculous name "Renesmee"? Should I start with Jacob imprinting on the vampire hybrid infant/toddler/whatever of the woman he loves? Or should I go right to the only really good part of the book, which was meeting all the different vampire clans, covens, and nomads, in preparation for a confrontation with the Volturi, only to have it build up to exactly nothing?
Stephenie Meyers has betrayed her readers on a scale that I have only ever seen from Laurell K. Hamilton. A series about choice and sacrifice has as its final volume an elaborate piece fanfiction that includes every cliche you can think of, in order to tie up everyone's stories with a neat little bow. Now, I am a married woman with a child, but I certainly don't think that's something to hold up to teen girls as something they should have done by age 18. I was never thrilled with the marriage plot, although considering Meyers' background I could have lived with it, but I found the pregnancy plot ridiculous, and worse, a cop-out. Meyers could have created the same conflict with the Volturi by having Bella decided she wanted a few more years of humanity- as she almost does decide, before the pregnancy angle comes into play. She could have resolved Jacob's story by having him fall for Leah- which would have tied up that poor girl's loose ends, too. She even still could have included Bella's change as a method to placate the Volturi, only to be too little, too late. Unfortunately, instead the author seemed to decided to take the most outlandish ideas she could come up with and run with them.
The good: reading the middle section from Jacob's POV. It was refreshing to have a realistic teenage voice and realistic teenage reactions to things. I also appreciated the plot involving the wolf pack, especially Leah and Seth. Unfortunately, this was mitigated by having Jacob's section focus almost entirely on Bella and the pregnancy, and ended with the most horrific delivery scene I've ever read and Jacob's imprinting on baby Nessie (no joke about the nickname, sadly). Another good aspect of the book I already mentioned, which was seeing all the various vampires from around the world, and reading about their interactions. Unfortunately, they came in to prepare for the most anticlimactic scene yet in this series.
Overall, I would categorize myself as horribly disappointed. I'm still shocked that what I just read was the real book and the true conclusion to Edward, Bella, and Jacob's stories. What a waste of 756 pages.(less)
Spoilers ahoy.
I'm not even sure where to start. Should I start with the contrived pregnancy? Should I start with the ridiculous name "Renesmee"? Should I start with Jacob imprinting on the vampire hybrid infant/toddler/whatever of the woman he loves? Or should I go right to the only really good part of the book, which was meeting all the different vampire clans, covens, and nomads, in preparation for a confrontation with the V...more I'm going to say right off the bat that this review contains spoilers.
Spoilers ahoy.
I'm not even sure where to start. Should I start with the contrived pregnancy? Should I start with the ridiculous name "Renesmee"? Should I start with Jacob imprinting on the vampire hybrid infant/toddler/whatever of the woman he loves? Or should I go right to the only really good part of the book, which was meeting all the different vampire clans, covens, and nomads, in preparation for a confrontation with the Volturi, only to have it build up to exactly nothing?
Stephenie Meyers has betrayed her readers on a scale that I have only ever seen from Laurell K. Hamilton. A series about choice and sacrifice has as its final volume an elaborate piece fanfiction that includes every cliche you can think of, in order to tie up everyone's stories with a neat little bow. Now, I am a married woman with a child, but I certainly don't think that's something to hold up to teen girls as something they should have done by age 18. I was never thrilled with the marriage plot, although considering Meyers' background I could have lived with it, but I found the pregnancy plot ridiculous, and worse, a cop-out. Meyers could have created the same conflict with the Volturi by having Bella decided she wanted a few more years of humanity- as she almost does decide, before the pregnancy angle comes into play. She could have resolved Jacob's story by having him fall for Leah- which would have tied up that poor girl's loose ends, too. She even still could have included Bella's change as a method to placate the Volturi, only to be too little, too late. Unfortunately, instead the author seemed to decided to take the most outlandish ideas she could come up with and run with them.
The good: reading the middle section from Jacob's POV. It was refreshing to have a realistic teenage voice and realistic teenage reactions to things. I also appreciated the plot involving the wolf pack, especially Leah and Seth. Unfortunately, this was mitigated by having Jacob's section focus almost entirely on Bella and the pregnancy, and ended with the most horrific delivery scene I've ever read and Jacob's imprinting on baby Nessie (no joke about the nickname, sadly). Another good aspect of the book I already mentioned, which was seeing all the various vampires from around the world, and reading about their interactions. Unfortunately, they came in to prepare for the most anticlimactic scene yet in this series.
Overall, I would categorize myself as horribly disappointed. I'm still shocked that what I just read was the real book and the true conclusion to Edward, Bella, and Jacob's stories. What a waste of 756 pages.(less)
52 likes · like · see review
Brooke
Seeing things through Jacob's eyes was what I liked best about the book as well. Excellent review.
Jun 15, 2012 01:59pm
Jun 15, 2012 01:59pm
Shreya
What's wrong with the name Renesmee ? It's creative , unique and just amazing . You can't just expect everyone to go with the usual , boring names . Y...more
What's wrong with the name Renesmee ? It's creative , unique and just amazing . You can't just expect everyone to go with the usual , boring names . You are supposed to venture out and think out of the box , that's what makes writing fun , and that's what Meyer has done justice to , without a doubt . Peace !(less)
Dec 02, 2012 06:08pm
Dec 02, 2012 06:08pm
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I started reading at 12:30 am and went non-stop until 7pm. Meyer totally outdid herself! Best book in the series, bar-none! She created a completely original plot that flowed perfectly with the other books. All of the characters had depth and substance. Jacob was not a brat any more, although he still had moments when he got on my nerves. But I enjoyed the chance to read a few chapters from his point of view.
I had hoped that Meyer wouldn't wait until the end of the book for the wedding. But I w...more I started reading at 12:30 am and went non-stop until 7pm. Meyer totally outdid herself! Best book in the series, bar-none! She created a completely original plot that flowed perfectly with the other books. All of the characters had depth and substance. Jacob was not a brat any more, although he still had moments when he got on my nerves. But I enjoyed the chance to read a few chapters from his point of view.
I had hoped that Meyer wouldn't wait until the end of the book for the wedding. But I was also worried about how far she would be willing to write about other things. While it makes the world of difference to me if those things occur in a book after the couple is married, I still believe all of that is personal and private and does not need to be shared in detail with anyone. Even if it's fiction! So imagine my surprise that the wedding took place at the very beginning of the book--in the first 100 pages! And that she handled the whole honeymoon-Bella-still-in-human-state about 97% tastefully. Still a squeak more than I would prefer, but a landslide better than the 3rd book! Later in the story Meyer still handles well Bella's post-human experiences in her "second honeymoon."
Yes! She becomes a vampire only halfway through the book! I had not expected so much of the book to talk about Bella adjusting to this new state of existence. It was fascinating! I'm not advocating the undead or immortality of course. But this is a make-believe story, though it still in a round-about way ties into an LDS theme of eternal marriage. :-) I loved experiencing new vampire life with Bella, because it wasn't anywhere what they had all expected it to be. She took to it like ducks to water! So much fun, and much more enjoyable to see her and Edward in an equal relationship with no reservations. He doesn't have to carry her to get somewhere fast. He doesn't have to worry about her breakable nature. She can finally start fighting for herself and her loved ones. She finds unique talents and skills. And you can FINALLY see that she and Edward did have a relationship beyond just the physical. What a relief.
But the biggest most unexpected and also most exciting twist for me in this book was Bella getting pregnant! I picked up from the very first hint and started thinking, "Absolutely no way!" And do you know how excited I got? I mean, I'd been so angry at Bella for consciously throwing away her ability to have kids because she didn't care. I went to school with too many of those girls, and it hurt even then when I was first learning what was wrong with me. Can you imagine my shock, laughter, and happy surprise to totally connect with a vampire and a female werewolf on this in the book?!?!
And the growth that both Edward and Bella make as they're becoming parents, albeit rather quickly. To see the struggles of both during the pregnancy. The pain and yet the happiness. I'm serious, Meyer wrote that all so well I was feeling all of that, too. I especially loved the scene when Edward could hear the baby's thoughts! Oh, it was so tender! I was just upset that we were in Jacob's point of view at the time because I would have loved to have been in Bella's or even moreso Edward's head. Goodness, and the agonizing delivery. Heart-wrenching scene. And then raising the baby. Both Edward and Bella definitely came into their own I was very opposite from thinking that Bella was shallow anymore. Relief, too. Because I'd pretty much not liked her since chapter 4 of the very first book! I admired her so much by the end of this book. And Edward wasn't all that nauseating anymore either. His love and concern for her seemed more genuine and not all barfy-gooshy. Although, he could have cut down on a few of the "love" nicknames to Bella. Ug.
Oh my word, and the twist with Jacob at the end of his section? Wow! I laughed for 5 minutes when I picked up on what happened there. Absolutely hilarious! But perfect, too. It fit in and connected in places that I just wouldn't have believed. Whoa. Meyer did a fantastic job with that twist.
Overall, I am so happy with the book. Grateful that it my fears and worries were all for naught. So excited to have read a great story and plot with fantastic twists and great characters. Even the minor ones were great. And the big climactic confrontation at the end--but hardly any violence! Totally unexpected and yet totally fitting in with realistic. Well, as realistic as a world with vampires and werewolves can be. I certainly sensed Meyer's joy and faith in love, marriage and family from this book. I do believe she has redeemed her self somewhat. I still find the occasional swear word annoying and completely unnecessary. And since they are so rare, they stand out even more. Annoying! She really shot down my respect for her in the 3rd book, but I think with how Breaking Dawn is written, the entire series overall is worth it. If you are hesitant for the same reasons I am in books, just ask me for a summary and then read the last 4-5 chapters of the 3rd book and you won't miss too much.(less)
I had hoped that Meyer wouldn't wait until the end of the book for the wedding. But I w...more I started reading at 12:30 am and went non-stop until 7pm. Meyer totally outdid herself! Best book in the series, bar-none! She created a completely original plot that flowed perfectly with the other books. All of the characters had depth and substance. Jacob was not a brat any more, although he still had moments when he got on my nerves. But I enjoyed the chance to read a few chapters from his point of view.
I had hoped that Meyer wouldn't wait until the end of the book for the wedding. But I was also worried about how far she would be willing to write about other things. While it makes the world of difference to me if those things occur in a book after the couple is married, I still believe all of that is personal and private and does not need to be shared in detail with anyone. Even if it's fiction! So imagine my surprise that the wedding took place at the very beginning of the book--in the first 100 pages! And that she handled the whole honeymoon-Bella-still-in-human-state about 97% tastefully. Still a squeak more than I would prefer, but a landslide better than the 3rd book! Later in the story Meyer still handles well Bella's post-human experiences in her "second honeymoon."
Yes! She becomes a vampire only halfway through the book! I had not expected so much of the book to talk about Bella adjusting to this new state of existence. It was fascinating! I'm not advocating the undead or immortality of course. But this is a make-believe story, though it still in a round-about way ties into an LDS theme of eternal marriage. :-) I loved experiencing new vampire life with Bella, because it wasn't anywhere what they had all expected it to be. She took to it like ducks to water! So much fun, and much more enjoyable to see her and Edward in an equal relationship with no reservations. He doesn't have to carry her to get somewhere fast. He doesn't have to worry about her breakable nature. She can finally start fighting for herself and her loved ones. She finds unique talents and skills. And you can FINALLY see that she and Edward did have a relationship beyond just the physical. What a relief.
But the biggest most unexpected and also most exciting twist for me in this book was Bella getting pregnant! I picked up from the very first hint and started thinking, "Absolutely no way!" And do you know how excited I got? I mean, I'd been so angry at Bella for consciously throwing away her ability to have kids because she didn't care. I went to school with too many of those girls, and it hurt even then when I was first learning what was wrong with me. Can you imagine my shock, laughter, and happy surprise to totally connect with a vampire and a female werewolf on this in the book?!?!
And the growth that both Edward and Bella make as they're becoming parents, albeit rather quickly. To see the struggles of both during the pregnancy. The pain and yet the happiness. I'm serious, Meyer wrote that all so well I was feeling all of that, too. I especially loved the scene when Edward could hear the baby's thoughts! Oh, it was so tender! I was just upset that we were in Jacob's point of view at the time because I would have loved to have been in Bella's or even moreso Edward's head. Goodness, and the agonizing delivery. Heart-wrenching scene. And then raising the baby. Both Edward and Bella definitely came into their own I was very opposite from thinking that Bella was shallow anymore. Relief, too. Because I'd pretty much not liked her since chapter 4 of the very first book! I admired her so much by the end of this book. And Edward wasn't all that nauseating anymore either. His love and concern for her seemed more genuine and not all barfy-gooshy. Although, he could have cut down on a few of the "love" nicknames to Bella. Ug.
Oh my word, and the twist with Jacob at the end of his section? Wow! I laughed for 5 minutes when I picked up on what happened there. Absolutely hilarious! But perfect, too. It fit in and connected in places that I just wouldn't have believed. Whoa. Meyer did a fantastic job with that twist.
Overall, I am so happy with the book. Grateful that it my fears and worries were all for naught. So excited to have read a great story and plot with fantastic twists and great characters. Even the minor ones were great. And the big climactic confrontation at the end--but hardly any violence! Totally unexpected and yet totally fitting in with realistic. Well, as realistic as a world with vampires and werewolves can be. I certainly sensed Meyer's joy and faith in love, marriage and family from this book. I do believe she has redeemed her self somewhat. I still find the occasional swear word annoying and completely unnecessary. And since they are so rare, they stand out even more. Annoying! She really shot down my respect for her in the 3rd book, but I think with how Breaking Dawn is written, the entire series overall is worth it. If you are hesitant for the same reasons I am in books, just ask me for a summary and then read the last 4-5 chapters of the 3rd book and you won't miss too much.(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Ho boy.
So I mildly enjoyed the first two books in Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series--enough that I considered myself somewhat of a Twilight apologist. No, no, I tried to convince the naysayers, she's really not all bad! Though I found Twilight and New Moon to be deeply flawed, I also thought that Meyer had her finger right on the pulse of adolescent melancholy. What Bella's story may have lacked in feminist leanings, it made up for in rich setting and earnestness, if nothing else. I didn't quite...more Ho boy.
So I mildly enjoyed the first two books in Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series--enough that I considered myself somewhat of a Twilight apologist. No, no, I tried to convince the naysayers, she's really not all bad! Though I found Twilight and New Moon to be deeply flawed, I also thought that Meyer had her finger right on the pulse of adolescent melancholy. What Bella's story may have lacked in feminist leanings, it made up for in rich setting and earnestness, if nothing else. I didn't quite like them enough to buy Eclipse, but when a friend offered to lend me the massive tome that is Breaking Dawn, I figured it wouldn't kill me to give it a try.
Well. Um. Hmm.
I'll say that, like the series it concludes, Breaking Dawn starts with some promise. Whiny McWhinerston Bella Swann is angsting over her impending shotgun marriage to vampire Edward. It's an act that's largely a technicality for her--something she grudgingly plans to endure so she can get laid and get some superpowers. While I found this model of dealmaking-in-the-place-of-compromise in an adult relationship a bit troublesome, I also found most of the sentiment honest. Okay, maybe I wouldn't raise a stink about my sugar daddy buying me a Mercedes (or is it a Beemer? Whatever), but as a recently-married type, I empathized.
But then Bella gets hitched and the book completely falls apart. And we're only an eighth of the way in to this door-stopper of a dud.
I don't really want to rehash all the plot points here, no matter how cringe worthy they are and how easy it would be to play them for laughs (yes, the childbirth scene is the first that pushes this series into horror; yes, Bella sucks at naming children). What I want, instead, is to talk a little about the overarching theme here--how Bella is the best, how her life is the best, and how everything falls into place around her--and why it didn't resonate with me.
I say this as a woman married to her first serious boyfriend, who she met at eighteen: I think Bella's story does a disservice to young wives. It certainly does one to young mothers. Not to mention anyone who has ever actually been a corner of a love triangle.
I understand that these books are meant to be wish-fulfillment, but by making Bella's life so utterly perfect and utterly easy, Meyer fails to acknowledge life's actual complexities and pains--and so the joy found here is pretty shallow. Nothing is earned. Nothing is lost. The stakes are so low as to be non-existent. We know that nothing bad will happen to anyone because Meyer shows us again and again that Forks is really some sort of fluffy-cloud heaven. And so the final, patched-together plot, building only over the last two hundred pages, has no urgency at all. I'll admit it: I skimmed. So sue me.
She could have, instead, given us something honest and bittersweet, a story of love and loss and growing older--because really, in not-so-many metaphorical words, that should be what Bella's marriage, motherhood, and subsequent vampirism represent. Sure, have Bella choose Edward, choose her child--but let's talk honestly about what these choices usually mean for women like Bella, what they have to sacrifice to make their young families work, what they lose, and what they gain, in becoming fully-fledged women so young.
Instead, Meyer chooses to lock her characters in a hellish fantasy of perpetual childhood--maybe this is what she meant by the Millay line at the front of the book? In the place of genuine tenderness or beauty, she gives us the saccharine (Bella and her daughter's flawless and unearned perfection), the unbelievable (Charlie's reaction to . . . everything), and the bizarre (pedophiliac imprinting).
But perhaps worst of all is the writing, the truly terrible writing. And by the end of this novel it really is--truly--terrible. It's a slow slide into poopy prose; thanks to a middle-eight spent in the narrative clutches of Jacob, whose voice is far less assuming and much more casual, it's easy to forget even the descriptive potential that Breaking Dawn revealed in the first few hundred pages. Forks is, at a time when it should be completely immersive, suddenly rendered in flat, lifeless terms. Description and narration are all pushed aside for cutesy dialog. Two passages near the end--one slightly hackneyed extended metaphor where Bella's life is likened to a quilt, and another, where her brand new Thomas-Kinkade-calendar-esque cottage in the woods is described--stand out for not being completely awful.
Seriously, the novel's last third was so poorly written and so unbelievable that I couldn't help but grope for some sort of explanation. I mean, we weren't really meant to believe this, were we, much less find it good?
So I'd like to suggest an alternative reading--one that seems quite a bit more palatable to me, and a bit more believable. Bella actually dies permanently in childbirth. The last third is her bardo fantasy before she can move on to the next spiritual plane (thanks for the idea, LOST writers). That's why it's so goddamned weird! In the real world, the baby goes on a rampage--killing Rosalie first, then savaging the other vampires. Against all odds Jacob and Edward are able to band together to stop and kill the monstrous being. Of course, once this happens, Edward asks Jacob to end his life. He does, sorrowfully, laying Edward to rest beside his child bride. And he's about to end his own when Leah Clearwater appears to suggest that maybe they should try to face the future together. He may be mourning; she may be sterile. But they still have free will and can still choose life with an equal, could still choose love.
What can I say? I'm a sucker for a bittersweet ending.(less)
So I mildly enjoyed the first two books in Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series--enough that I considered myself somewhat of a Twilight apologist. No, no, I tried to convince the naysayers, she's really not all bad! Though I found Twilight and New Moon to be deeply flawed, I also thought that Meyer had her finger right on the pulse of adolescent melancholy. What Bella's story may have lacked in feminist leanings, it made up for in rich setting and earnestness, if nothing else. I didn't quite...more Ho boy.
So I mildly enjoyed the first two books in Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series--enough that I considered myself somewhat of a Twilight apologist. No, no, I tried to convince the naysayers, she's really not all bad! Though I found Twilight and New Moon to be deeply flawed, I also thought that Meyer had her finger right on the pulse of adolescent melancholy. What Bella's story may have lacked in feminist leanings, it made up for in rich setting and earnestness, if nothing else. I didn't quite like them enough to buy Eclipse, but when a friend offered to lend me the massive tome that is Breaking Dawn, I figured it wouldn't kill me to give it a try.
Well. Um. Hmm.
I'll say that, like the series it concludes, Breaking Dawn starts with some promise. Whiny McWhinerston Bella Swann is angsting over her impending shotgun marriage to vampire Edward. It's an act that's largely a technicality for her--something she grudgingly plans to endure so she can get laid and get some superpowers. While I found this model of dealmaking-in-the-place-of-compromise in an adult relationship a bit troublesome, I also found most of the sentiment honest. Okay, maybe I wouldn't raise a stink about my sugar daddy buying me a Mercedes (or is it a Beemer? Whatever), but as a recently-married type, I empathized.
But then Bella gets hitched and the book completely falls apart. And we're only an eighth of the way in to this door-stopper of a dud.
I don't really want to rehash all the plot points here, no matter how cringe worthy they are and how easy it would be to play them for laughs (yes, the childbirth scene is the first that pushes this series into horror; yes, Bella sucks at naming children). What I want, instead, is to talk a little about the overarching theme here--how Bella is the best, how her life is the best, and how everything falls into place around her--and why it didn't resonate with me.
I say this as a woman married to her first serious boyfriend, who she met at eighteen: I think Bella's story does a disservice to young wives. It certainly does one to young mothers. Not to mention anyone who has ever actually been a corner of a love triangle.
I understand that these books are meant to be wish-fulfillment, but by making Bella's life so utterly perfect and utterly easy, Meyer fails to acknowledge life's actual complexities and pains--and so the joy found here is pretty shallow. Nothing is earned. Nothing is lost. The stakes are so low as to be non-existent. We know that nothing bad will happen to anyone because Meyer shows us again and again that Forks is really some sort of fluffy-cloud heaven. And so the final, patched-together plot, building only over the last two hundred pages, has no urgency at all. I'll admit it: I skimmed. So sue me.
She could have, instead, given us something honest and bittersweet, a story of love and loss and growing older--because really, in not-so-many metaphorical words, that should be what Bella's marriage, motherhood, and subsequent vampirism represent. Sure, have Bella choose Edward, choose her child--but let's talk honestly about what these choices usually mean for women like Bella, what they have to sacrifice to make their young families work, what they lose, and what they gain, in becoming fully-fledged women so young.
Instead, Meyer chooses to lock her characters in a hellish fantasy of perpetual childhood--maybe this is what she meant by the Millay line at the front of the book? In the place of genuine tenderness or beauty, she gives us the saccharine (Bella and her daughter's flawless and unearned perfection), the unbelievable (Charlie's reaction to . . . everything), and the bizarre (pedophiliac imprinting).
But perhaps worst of all is the writing, the truly terrible writing. And by the end of this novel it really is--truly--terrible. It's a slow slide into poopy prose; thanks to a middle-eight spent in the narrative clutches of Jacob, whose voice is far less assuming and much more casual, it's easy to forget even the descriptive potential that Breaking Dawn revealed in the first few hundred pages. Forks is, at a time when it should be completely immersive, suddenly rendered in flat, lifeless terms. Description and narration are all pushed aside for cutesy dialog. Two passages near the end--one slightly hackneyed extended metaphor where Bella's life is likened to a quilt, and another, where her brand new Thomas-Kinkade-calendar-esque cottage in the woods is described--stand out for not being completely awful.
Seriously, the novel's last third was so poorly written and so unbelievable that I couldn't help but grope for some sort of explanation. I mean, we weren't really meant to believe this, were we, much less find it good?
So I'd like to suggest an alternative reading--one that seems quite a bit more palatable to me, and a bit more believable. Bella actually dies permanently in childbirth. The last third is her bardo fantasy before she can move on to the next spiritual plane (thanks for the idea, LOST writers). That's why it's so goddamned weird! In the real world, the baby goes on a rampage--killing Rosalie first, then savaging the other vampires. Against all odds Jacob and Edward are able to band together to stop and kill the monstrous being. Of course, once this happens, Edward asks Jacob to end his life. He does, sorrowfully, laying Edward to rest beside his child bride. And he's about to end his own when Leah Clearwater appears to suggest that maybe they should try to face the future together. He may be mourning; she may be sterile. But they still have free will and can still choose life with an equal, could still choose love.
What can I say? I'm a sucker for a bittersweet ending.(less)
25 likes · like · see review
Regina
I started to copy out excerpts of this review to quote and say -- yeah this, but then I realized I had copied the entire review. Beautifully written -...more
I started to copy out excerpts of this review to quote and say -- yeah this, but then I realized I had copied the entire review. Beautifully written -- thanks for sharing. And yes completely about the permanent childhood.(less)
Feb 18, 2012 04:25pm
Feb 18, 2012 04:25pm
Aug 29, 2011
Penny
rated it
1 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Anyone who wants to rid themselves of their Twilight obsession
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I wanted to love this book; to read it over and over until my head exploded. I tried to love it, even after page 360, and my complete disappointment of Jacob imprinting--on Bella’s mutant baby, no less. But I kept reading because I just knew that Stephenie was going to make it up to me.
The more I read the more difficult it became for me to finish. I am ashamed to say I endured the torture ‘til the bitter end--and, oh, was it bitter! Or rather, so sickeningly sweet it caused me to throw up in my...more I wanted to love this book; to read it over and over until my head exploded. I tried to love it, even after page 360, and my complete disappointment of Jacob imprinting--on Bella’s mutant baby, no less. But I kept reading because I just knew that Stephenie was going to make it up to me.
The more I read the more difficult it became for me to finish. I am ashamed to say I endured the torture ‘til the bitter end--and, oh, was it bitter! Or rather, so sickeningly sweet it caused me to throw up in my mouth a little. Don’t get me wrong, I am all about happy endings but not at the expense of a good plot.
Breaking Dawn could have been a pretty good ending to an okay series. To say I am disappointed with this book doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel. In all honesty, this book ruined the entire series for me. I no longer have the desire to pick up any of the other books--which I quite liked at one time. There is no way I could read them again now that I know the ending is so ridonculous (rE-D'on-kU-lus; Adjective, used when the word ridiculous just isn't enough).
This book started off okay, with Bella angst-ing about having to drive a flashy car and getting married at such a young age--Classic Bella, am I right? But after the wedding and even the majority of the honeymoon, things went downhill. Bella, pregnant? Really? But, I was willing to forgive that particular plot twist even though it defied Mrs. Meyers canon about vampires. And she never said it wasn’t possible for a human to get pregnant after having sex with a vampire, so I simply shrugged my shoulders went with it.
I’ll admit that I liked the Jacob chapters, despite the fact that Edward offers Bella to Jacob so long as Jacob can convince Bella to abort the abomination that they’ve created with Edwards magical vampire sperm--Edward was watching his 'true love' die and it was torturing him, so of course he lost touch with reality. Totally understandable (although completely icky as well) so I hand-waved that. Forgave it. I started getting aggravated when Bella was totally drawing Jacob back in (unbeknownst to us, the readers, it’s only because she’s pregnant with his future bride. More about that atrocity later) and setting him up for more heartbreak--classic selfish Bella that we love to hate.
I really hoped that Jacob would find the ability to move past his love of Bella on his own. I don’t know about anyone else but I am getting sick of the I-cannot-live-without-you kind of “love” (more like freaky obsession) that has been going on in these novels. It is actually possible to heal from a broken heart and, you know, MOVE ON!
It seemed as though Stephenie was going to have that happen, that Leah and Jacob might deepen their friendship and discover that they actually care for each other. But, that would erase Jacob from Bella’s life and we couldn’t have that. No--Jacob gets to imprint on the abomination that is Renesmee. Lucky him! Now Jacob doesn’t actually have to work to heal his broken heart. Oh, and of course, lucky Bella for not actually having to sacrifice anything. Three books full chalk full of Bella's fears, about having to give up all her human relationships, was really all for not(I hate you Bella Swan-Cullen. And I really hate Little Brown Books for screwing me out of all that money).
Now on to the delivery of Renesmee: WOW, talk about a joyous occasion! What with Bella vomiting a--I kid you not--'fountain of blood'; the breaking of bones (Bella's back was snapped); the c-section preformed with Edwards mouth (yes, I just said MOUTH); little Renesmee--who, creepily enough, is actually born with a full set of teeth--gives new meaning to the words 'breast feeding', and mama flat lining after all was said and done. It really is too bad they didn’t get the whole thing on film.
Renesmee, hmmm…where to start? I’m not even going to touch the subject of her name with a ten-foot-pole. I’m just going to say that the way she’s described in the novel sounds more like the Bride of Chucky instead of some super cute baby. All the rapid growing, blood drinking and mind-melding was in no way endearing, it was weird.
Considering that the romance was non-existent in the last 3/4 of this novel, it totally lacked in cute Bella and Edward moments. All we got was not-sexy, kinky, tantric, vampire sex that had the potential to go for days, or even weeks (yes, Bella actually thinks about that being a possibility). YIKES AND...JUST YIKES!
Isn't it just super great that Bella gets to keep Charlie in her life? It proves that you really can have your (disgusting blood) cake and eat it too. I love that the sheriff in town doesn't even want to know anything about the vampires in town--unless, of course, it is entirely necessary. Which, I'm sorry but when a huge group of vampires descend on the area 'round about, I'd say that's a need to know basis. But does anyone tell Charlie? No. Apparently ignorance really is bliss.
Oh, and I loved how Renee, Bella's mom, just disappeared into obscurity. She didn't even call when Bella was supposedly in lockdown with some deadly Brazilian disease. Seriously though, when did Renee go from being the overbearing mother who would FREAK OUT about not hearing from Bella, every day, to one that could care less what the crap happened to her?
The epic battle was more like an epic failure. The whole book was building up to the fight in the woods and then nothing happened. Talk about anti-climatic. I found that I was just as disappointed as the Romanian vampires were. The only casualty was Irina and it's not like she was important enough to be broken up over.
Despite the fact that I am a huge Jacob fan, I would have been okay with him dying to protect the little monster he'd imprinted on. I mean, JK Rowling killed DUMBLEDORE, for crying out loud. Stephenie could have killed just ONE of her precious characters. By doing so, she would have been able to breathe some life into this flaming pile of garbage.
And it seemed to me that by avoiding a fight the Cullens just woke a sleeping giant. Based on the conversation they were having after the "battle", it seems to me that they knew the Volturi were going to come back and attempt pick them off one-by-one. Wow, talk about a victory! But why worry when Bella has mad vampire skillz? Am I right?
Worst line from this book: "Goodbye, Jacob, my brother... my son." *dry-heave* *shutter* *cringe* *shutter*
The last few pages when Bella lifted her "shield" for Edward, so he could read her mind, wasn't all that bad. I kind of liked that part, to tell you the truth. I also liked learning more about Leah Clearwater (in the Jacob chapters). In all honesty, it was the rest of the book that was full of fail.
TWO ENTHUSIASTIC THUMBS WAY DOWN!
(Edited on Sunday August 17, 2008)(less)
The more I read the more difficult it became for me to finish. I am ashamed to say I endured the torture ‘til the bitter end--and, oh, was it bitter! Or rather, so sickeningly sweet it caused me to throw up in my...more I wanted to love this book; to read it over and over until my head exploded. I tried to love it, even after page 360, and my complete disappointment of Jacob imprinting--on Bella’s mutant baby, no less. But I kept reading because I just knew that Stephenie was going to make it up to me.
The more I read the more difficult it became for me to finish. I am ashamed to say I endured the torture ‘til the bitter end--and, oh, was it bitter! Or rather, so sickeningly sweet it caused me to throw up in my mouth a little. Don’t get me wrong, I am all about happy endings but not at the expense of a good plot.
Breaking Dawn could have been a pretty good ending to an okay series. To say I am disappointed with this book doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel. In all honesty, this book ruined the entire series for me. I no longer have the desire to pick up any of the other books--which I quite liked at one time. There is no way I could read them again now that I know the ending is so ridonculous (rE-D'on-kU-lus; Adjective, used when the word ridiculous just isn't enough).
This book started off okay, with Bella angst-ing about having to drive a flashy car and getting married at such a young age--Classic Bella, am I right? But after the wedding and even the majority of the honeymoon, things went downhill. Bella, pregnant? Really? But, I was willing to forgive that particular plot twist even though it defied Mrs. Meyers canon about vampires. And she never said it wasn’t possible for a human to get pregnant after having sex with a vampire, so I simply shrugged my shoulders went with it.
I’ll admit that I liked the Jacob chapters, despite the fact that Edward offers Bella to Jacob so long as Jacob can convince Bella to abort the abomination that they’ve created with Edwards magical vampire sperm--Edward was watching his 'true love' die and it was torturing him, so of course he lost touch with reality. Totally understandable (although completely icky as well) so I hand-waved that. Forgave it. I started getting aggravated when Bella was totally drawing Jacob back in (unbeknownst to us, the readers, it’s only because she’s pregnant with his future bride. More about that atrocity later) and setting him up for more heartbreak--classic selfish Bella that we love to hate.
I really hoped that Jacob would find the ability to move past his love of Bella on his own. I don’t know about anyone else but I am getting sick of the I-cannot-live-without-you kind of “love” (more like freaky obsession) that has been going on in these novels. It is actually possible to heal from a broken heart and, you know, MOVE ON!
It seemed as though Stephenie was going to have that happen, that Leah and Jacob might deepen their friendship and discover that they actually care for each other. But, that would erase Jacob from Bella’s life and we couldn’t have that. No--Jacob gets to imprint on the abomination that is Renesmee. Lucky him! Now Jacob doesn’t actually have to work to heal his broken heart. Oh, and of course, lucky Bella for not actually having to sacrifice anything. Three books full chalk full of Bella's fears, about having to give up all her human relationships, was really all for not(I hate you Bella Swan-Cullen. And I really hate Little Brown Books for screwing me out of all that money).
Now on to the delivery of Renesmee: WOW, talk about a joyous occasion! What with Bella vomiting a--I kid you not--'fountain of blood'; the breaking of bones (Bella's back was snapped); the c-section preformed with Edwards mouth (yes, I just said MOUTH); little Renesmee--who, creepily enough, is actually born with a full set of teeth--gives new meaning to the words 'breast feeding', and mama flat lining after all was said and done. It really is too bad they didn’t get the whole thing on film.
Renesmee, hmmm…where to start? I’m not even going to touch the subject of her name with a ten-foot-pole. I’m just going to say that the way she’s described in the novel sounds more like the Bride of Chucky instead of some super cute baby. All the rapid growing, blood drinking and mind-melding was in no way endearing, it was weird.
Considering that the romance was non-existent in the last 3/4 of this novel, it totally lacked in cute Bella and Edward moments. All we got was not-sexy, kinky, tantric, vampire sex that had the potential to go for days, or even weeks (yes, Bella actually thinks about that being a possibility). YIKES AND...JUST YIKES!
Isn't it just super great that Bella gets to keep Charlie in her life? It proves that you really can have your (disgusting blood) cake and eat it too. I love that the sheriff in town doesn't even want to know anything about the vampires in town--unless, of course, it is entirely necessary. Which, I'm sorry but when a huge group of vampires descend on the area 'round about, I'd say that's a need to know basis. But does anyone tell Charlie? No. Apparently ignorance really is bliss.
Oh, and I loved how Renee, Bella's mom, just disappeared into obscurity. She didn't even call when Bella was supposedly in lockdown with some deadly Brazilian disease. Seriously though, when did Renee go from being the overbearing mother who would FREAK OUT about not hearing from Bella, every day, to one that could care less what the crap happened to her?
The epic battle was more like an epic failure. The whole book was building up to the fight in the woods and then nothing happened. Talk about anti-climatic. I found that I was just as disappointed as the Romanian vampires were. The only casualty was Irina and it's not like she was important enough to be broken up over.
Despite the fact that I am a huge Jacob fan, I would have been okay with him dying to protect the little monster he'd imprinted on. I mean, JK Rowling killed DUMBLEDORE, for crying out loud. Stephenie could have killed just ONE of her precious characters. By doing so, she would have been able to breathe some life into this flaming pile of garbage.
And it seemed to me that by avoiding a fight the Cullens just woke a sleeping giant. Based on the conversation they were having after the "battle", it seems to me that they knew the Volturi were going to come back and attempt pick them off one-by-one. Wow, talk about a victory! But why worry when Bella has mad vampire skillz? Am I right?
Worst line from this book: "Goodbye, Jacob, my brother... my son." *dry-heave* *shutter* *cringe* *shutter*
The last few pages when Bella lifted her "shield" for Edward, so he could read her mind, wasn't all that bad. I kind of liked that part, to tell you the truth. I also liked learning more about Leah Clearwater (in the Jacob chapters). In all honesty, it was the rest of the book that was full of fail.
TWO ENTHUSIASTIC THUMBS WAY DOWN!
(Edited on Sunday August 17, 2008)(less)
If you're already to Breaking Dawn you might as well finish it and put yourself out of your misery.
27 likes · like · see review
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Before Breaking Dawn was released, Stephenie Meyer had a countdown on her website. (stepheniemeyer.com (duh)) My best friend (Sam!) and I spent yesterday flipping between windows to check on said countdown. Needless to say, we were pretty excited.
We really wanted to go to the midnight party, but Daniel threw a wrench in our plans...(he wanted to go, too, but Sam's dad didn't want to take him...Buddy's weird like that). Eventually, we convinced him that he would get it by today (Although that's l...more Before Breaking Dawn was released, Stephenie Meyer had a countdown on her website. (stepheniemeyer.com (duh)) My best friend (Sam!) and I spent yesterday flipping between windows to check on said countdown. Needless to say, we were pretty excited.
We really wanted to go to the midnight party, but Daniel threw a wrench in our plans...(he wanted to go, too, but Sam's dad didn't want to take him...Buddy's weird like that). Eventually, we convinced him that he would get it by today (Although that's looking iffy right now).
We got there at 8:00 and got fairly early non-reserved slips. (second priority, after the people who were getting reserved slips.) We spent the next hour reading Uglies by Scott Westerfield. At 9:00 the party began!
We went to the kids section where they were spray painting hair, painting fingernails, and giving vamp bites. So these twelve-year-old girls had sooooooo much fun spray painting my hair red and black (it actually looked pretty cool...) The same incredibly enthusiastic 12-year-old massacred my nails (she got nail polish all over my fingers!) Anyway, we went to get our fortunes told by Allison! (retarded ones, but hey, what can i say? I'm supposed to let go of doubts, or something...)
Next, we wandered around...and found Katie!! :) I haven't seen Katie in forever!!!!!! Yay, Katie! (I miss Katie...) We sat with her in the Starbucks, while avoiding a couple of stalkers...(that was rather difficult) and also seeing my amazingly awesome friend Ashlyn, who I won't tag, because I don't want her to have the book spoiled for her....Somehow, she won the costume contest, even though she wasn't dressed up...Ah, the curse of looking like Victoria....After that, we met up with Rebecca (whom I love and miss!). Also, the whole time we were there, we feverishly checked our raffle tickets everytime the overhead announcer thingy came on. (We didn't win...darn)
Anyway, the night's events boiled down to be pretty amazingly fun, even though we were bored with what the party was offering.
Midnight rolled around, and they finally called...section A! ...we were sort of like section F...only not really...section NR (for non reserved). So finally they get through section A-E, and we're up! We're eagerly anticipating...
And then I'm at the register, handing the nice lady my $17.40!! And then, encased in this absolutely amazing Barnes & Noble Bag...is...
BREAKING DAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you say jumping off the wall with delight? Cool, i can, too. Not that I was really doing that, although some people were... Seriously, they were screaming and freaking out...
So, we left Barnes & Noble, got home about 12:45 pm (not bad). We read until about 5:00 in the morning...about halfway done, and then Sam was about to fall out, so we turned the lights out and went to sleep.
After waking up at 11:00 (which is incredibly late for me), we finished the book.
WARNING: DO NOT READ PAST THIS NOTE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE BOOK!!!1 (I don't know if I'll write spoilers, but just in case...)
Now...On to the review.
Okay, my overall reaction is to scream "GAA" and spaz out! In a bad way. One freaking star...out of five.
I like many others in my generation (or, at least, the broke ones) did not buy the special edition of Eclipse... I sneaked into Wal*Mart and read the first chapter of Breaking Dawn.
It. Sucked.
No offense, Stephenie, but that was incredibly boring! Nothing happened!!! And a happy place? WHAT THE CRAP?
Anyway, when we got home, we just skipped the first chapter (knowing it was crap) and went straight into the second chapter.
From chapter 2 to the middle of chapter 4, the book was pretty good. It was what I expected, and it was the Stephenie Meyer I was used to.
Of course, I know Stephenie said she wasn't writing sex scenes, which I'm totally cool with. But when the arrived on Isle Esme, the whole thing just got awkward.
It was so weird, but the tone of the book was suddenly completely and totally altered. It was like some evil reincarnation of Stephenie Meyer had taken over writing the book! It wasn't...right! It was as if the Stephenie I've grown to know and love died and was replaced by some crazy artificial life form!!! :'(
I felt soooo betrayed!!
And then she got pregnant! WHAT!
I'm not opposed to such an event. It's totally cool, so long as STEPHENIE is writing it. But since she's already been replaced by some clone, it was wrong. Furthermore, the whole pregnancy was just wrong for the world she had created.
And then Jacob! Of course, the speculators were right. Part of the book was told from Jacob's point of view. Despite the fact that the whole pregnancy thing was just...creepy...Jacob's 'book' was actually very enjoyable. I give this section 5 stars! The tone was right for Jacob, and it was like Stephenie stepped back in for a moment.
However, the whole imprinting thing was incredibly obvious. If you're reading this despite the spoiler warning, I'm stopping here...cuz i don't feel like delving into it anyway. (I did like who he imprinted on, and the fact that he imprinted)
Back to Bella. So, of course, she becomes a vampire. (My reaction here: Yes! This is what I've been waiting for!)
But then it screws up again! She's way too graceful, despite the fact that she's a vampire! AND! She has way too much control! It made the book seem unrealistic. (Okay, so the vampires made it seem unrealistic...but you get what I mean.) That ruined the book...
And then the Volturi gets involved, which is pretty cool. By this point, Stephenie is writing again, and I'm actually liking the book.
But the ending of the Volturi was retarded. So they're all set up to fight, when Little Miss Mary Sue (aka, Bella) suddenly gains another power! Of course, this frightens the Volturi so much, they immediately give in, realizing that they can't win! Here, I'll paraphrase!
Jane: EGAD! My power's not working on ANY of them!
Alec: MINE EITHER!
Bella: *smirks*
Aro: OMC! It must be BELLA, that outrageously perfect vampire!
Edward: muahahahaha!
Alice: *randomly reappears, bringing more help*
Aro: Well, since we obviously have nothing to kill you guys for, it looks like we can leave! Bye!
*meanwhile, back at Sam's house, with me, the reader* WHAT! That was retarded! After fifty pages of buildup, they're just going to walk away?
...Apparently so.
Gosh, they should have just killed the Cullens, and assorted vampires! Jacob and his imprint could have just rode of into the Sunrise (according to Sam's mom, who's name is Dawn, Sunsets mean death...i really think she just wanted us to incorporate her name in here...), and it would have been a better ending.
Not that I hate the Cullens or anything. It just would have been a better ending.
Things I forgot, but don't feel like going back to add:
1. The awkward sex scene, without the sex. Like I said, not complaining that there was not graphic description. BUT! Did she have to make them have a conversation, while we knew what they were doing, but she just acted like they were talking. (If you made any sense out of that...congrats)
2. Emmett was soooooooo weird in this book! What's with the sudden pervertedness? Oh, okay, now Bella's a vamp, I'll act like some internet pedophile...okay, or just make perverted comments while her father is in the room. Whatever.
3. I did like how Rosalie and Bella became friends. That, at least, was realistic.
4. The whole Jacob imprinting thing was cool, but it did bring awkwardness...
5. Renesmee does not = Loch Ness Monster. I can't believe they went along with that one...
I think that's pretty much it...I give most of the book one or two stars, but throwing the five star part in it, I guess it's more like...three stars...
And that is all.
By the way, writing this review has really eased my dislike towards this book. That was a lot of fun, and I realized that it had redeeming qualities...yay!(less)
We really wanted to go to the midnight party, but Daniel threw a wrench in our plans...(he wanted to go, too, but Sam's dad didn't want to take him...Buddy's weird like that). Eventually, we convinced him that he would get it by today (Although that's l...more Before Breaking Dawn was released, Stephenie Meyer had a countdown on her website. (stepheniemeyer.com (duh)) My best friend (Sam!) and I spent yesterday flipping between windows to check on said countdown. Needless to say, we were pretty excited.
We really wanted to go to the midnight party, but Daniel threw a wrench in our plans...(he wanted to go, too, but Sam's dad didn't want to take him...Buddy's weird like that). Eventually, we convinced him that he would get it by today (Although that's looking iffy right now).
We got there at 8:00 and got fairly early non-reserved slips. (second priority, after the people who were getting reserved slips.) We spent the next hour reading Uglies by Scott Westerfield. At 9:00 the party began!
We went to the kids section where they were spray painting hair, painting fingernails, and giving vamp bites. So these twelve-year-old girls had sooooooo much fun spray painting my hair red and black (it actually looked pretty cool...) The same incredibly enthusiastic 12-year-old massacred my nails (she got nail polish all over my fingers!) Anyway, we went to get our fortunes told by Allison! (retarded ones, but hey, what can i say? I'm supposed to let go of doubts, or something...)
Next, we wandered around...and found Katie!! :) I haven't seen Katie in forever!!!!!! Yay, Katie! (I miss Katie...) We sat with her in the Starbucks, while avoiding a couple of stalkers...(that was rather difficult) and also seeing my amazingly awesome friend Ashlyn, who I won't tag, because I don't want her to have the book spoiled for her....Somehow, she won the costume contest, even though she wasn't dressed up...Ah, the curse of looking like Victoria....After that, we met up with Rebecca (whom I love and miss!). Also, the whole time we were there, we feverishly checked our raffle tickets everytime the overhead announcer thingy came on. (We didn't win...darn)
Anyway, the night's events boiled down to be pretty amazingly fun, even though we were bored with what the party was offering.
Midnight rolled around, and they finally called...section A! ...we were sort of like section F...only not really...section NR (for non reserved). So finally they get through section A-E, and we're up! We're eagerly anticipating...
And then I'm at the register, handing the nice lady my $17.40!! And then, encased in this absolutely amazing Barnes & Noble Bag...is...
BREAKING DAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Can you say jumping off the wall with delight? Cool, i can, too. Not that I was really doing that, although some people were... Seriously, they were screaming and freaking out...
So, we left Barnes & Noble, got home about 12:45 pm (not bad). We read until about 5:00 in the morning...about halfway done, and then Sam was about to fall out, so we turned the lights out and went to sleep.
After waking up at 11:00 (which is incredibly late for me), we finished the book.
WARNING: DO NOT READ PAST THIS NOTE IF YOU HAVEN'T READ THE BOOK!!!1 (I don't know if I'll write spoilers, but just in case...)
Now...On to the review.
Okay, my overall reaction is to scream "GAA" and spaz out! In a bad way. One freaking star...out of five.
I like many others in my generation (or, at least, the broke ones) did not buy the special edition of Eclipse... I sneaked into Wal*Mart and read the first chapter of Breaking Dawn.
It. Sucked.
No offense, Stephenie, but that was incredibly boring! Nothing happened!!! And a happy place? WHAT THE CRAP?
Anyway, when we got home, we just skipped the first chapter (knowing it was crap) and went straight into the second chapter.
From chapter 2 to the middle of chapter 4, the book was pretty good. It was what I expected, and it was the Stephenie Meyer I was used to.
Of course, I know Stephenie said she wasn't writing sex scenes, which I'm totally cool with. But when the arrived on Isle Esme, the whole thing just got awkward.
It was so weird, but the tone of the book was suddenly completely and totally altered. It was like some evil reincarnation of Stephenie Meyer had taken over writing the book! It wasn't...right! It was as if the Stephenie I've grown to know and love died and was replaced by some crazy artificial life form!!! :'(
I felt soooo betrayed!!
And then she got pregnant! WHAT!
I'm not opposed to such an event. It's totally cool, so long as STEPHENIE is writing it. But since she's already been replaced by some clone, it was wrong. Furthermore, the whole pregnancy was just wrong for the world she had created.
And then Jacob! Of course, the speculators were right. Part of the book was told from Jacob's point of view. Despite the fact that the whole pregnancy thing was just...creepy...Jacob's 'book' was actually very enjoyable. I give this section 5 stars! The tone was right for Jacob, and it was like Stephenie stepped back in for a moment.
However, the whole imprinting thing was incredibly obvious. If you're reading this despite the spoiler warning, I'm stopping here...cuz i don't feel like delving into it anyway. (I did like who he imprinted on, and the fact that he imprinted)
Back to Bella. So, of course, she becomes a vampire. (My reaction here: Yes! This is what I've been waiting for!)
But then it screws up again! She's way too graceful, despite the fact that she's a vampire! AND! She has way too much control! It made the book seem unrealistic. (Okay, so the vampires made it seem unrealistic...but you get what I mean.) That ruined the book...
And then the Volturi gets involved, which is pretty cool. By this point, Stephenie is writing again, and I'm actually liking the book.
But the ending of the Volturi was retarded. So they're all set up to fight, when Little Miss Mary Sue (aka, Bella) suddenly gains another power! Of course, this frightens the Volturi so much, they immediately give in, realizing that they can't win! Here, I'll paraphrase!
Jane: EGAD! My power's not working on ANY of them!
Alec: MINE EITHER!
Bella: *smirks*
Aro: OMC! It must be BELLA, that outrageously perfect vampire!
Edward: muahahahaha!
Alice: *randomly reappears, bringing more help*
Aro: Well, since we obviously have nothing to kill you guys for, it looks like we can leave! Bye!
*meanwhile, back at Sam's house, with me, the reader* WHAT! That was retarded! After fifty pages of buildup, they're just going to walk away?
...Apparently so.
Gosh, they should have just killed the Cullens, and assorted vampires! Jacob and his imprint could have just rode of into the Sunrise (according to Sam's mom, who's name is Dawn, Sunsets mean death...i really think she just wanted us to incorporate her name in here...), and it would have been a better ending.
Not that I hate the Cullens or anything. It just would have been a better ending.
Things I forgot, but don't feel like going back to add:
1. The awkward sex scene, without the sex. Like I said, not complaining that there was not graphic description. BUT! Did she have to make them have a conversation, while we knew what they were doing, but she just acted like they were talking. (If you made any sense out of that...congrats)
2. Emmett was soooooooo weird in this book! What's with the sudden pervertedness? Oh, okay, now Bella's a vamp, I'll act like some internet pedophile...okay, or just make perverted comments while her father is in the room. Whatever.
3. I did like how Rosalie and Bella became friends. That, at least, was realistic.
4. The whole Jacob imprinting thing was cool, but it did bring awkwardness...
5. Renesmee does not = Loch Ness Monster. I can't believe they went along with that one...
I think that's pretty much it...I give most of the book one or two stars, but throwing the five star part in it, I guess it's more like...three stars...
And that is all.
By the way, writing this review has really eased my dislike towards this book. That was a lot of fun, and I realized that it had redeeming qualities...yay!(less)
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
(The fourth book in the Twilight series can not be any more eagerly anticipated. I have been slaking my thrist for more of this incredible story by rereading the first three novels over and over. Getting to read number four will be amazing! I can not wait to see what happens to these characters that I feel as if I know personally.
Only three hours until I get my hands on this baby!)
I have just finished reading this last novel of the Twilight series and I am breathless, emotionally drained and spe...more (The fourth book in the Twilight series can not be any more eagerly anticipated. I have been slaking my thrist for more of this incredible story by rereading the first three novels over and over. Getting to read number four will be amazing! I can not wait to see what happens to these characters that I feel as if I know personally.
Only three hours until I get my hands on this baby!)
I have just finished reading this last novel of the Twilight series and I am breathless, emotionally drained and spent. Why isn't there six or ten stars to give this book? What an amazing way to wrap up the series! I was speeding through the pages, reading as fast as I could to find out what would happen next. The twists had me every time (Bella pregnant?! Jacob imprinting on her daughter?!) and what I was hoping (Bella turning into a vampire, her amazing power and control) left me satisfied. The only thing I was wondering about is Bella's reaction to blood. In all the other books she gets woozey and faints but in this one she is drinking it down for the baby before she is a vampire. Maybe because it was not inflicted by a cut she was okay with it, it came in a cup so she did not have to see it? Just wondering.
One thing that I was so suprised to learn as I plowed through was that I was no longer thinking of Bella as a teenager, only 18 and so young. She turned into a young married wife and mother as I read on and the transformation make perfect sense. She truely matches Edward's old soul quality. The two of them are never more perfect for each other than in this book. And adding a child to their love intensified their bond for me. Although I would have liked to have seen a bit more interaction between Edward and his daughter (plus I am still mystified at Rosalie's role and why Bella turned to her for help...perhaps on my second read through it will become more clear)
I am also very impressed with the tasteful way Stephenie Meyer dealt with the sex in the book. She made it so we all knew what she was implying without coming right out and saying it. Perfectly discreet for her younger readers and enough of a tease for us older ones. :)
I admit I was initially disappointed with Jacob's part as narrator. I enjoy seeing things from Bella's perspective. But when I reached the end of that part of the book, after he had imprinted on Renesmee, I understood why it was vital for him to tell his side of the story at that moment. Because that is where his love for Bella finally changed and matched her own, solving the love triangle problem.
The last part of the book had me on the edge of my seat. It was so wonderful to meet the other vampires and their unique talents. And the standoff against the Volturi had me alternately bawling and holding my breath. Such drama and passion. I loved it! The resolution, while good for now, makes me wonder if perhaps their may be more books in the future featuring Bella and Edward's young daughter and Jacob as the narrators having to deal with a rebuffed Volturi.
All in all, I thought the book was a fitting way to wrap up the series. I know after reading a bunch of comments about this book several people are very disappointed in the turn of events but I think everything fit perfectly. I will enjoy reading it again and picking up things I may have missed. And then in December of 2008 we have the movie and the Twilight Guide to look forward to!(less)
Only three hours until I get my hands on this baby!)
I have just finished reading this last novel of the Twilight series and I am breathless, emotionally drained and spe...more (The fourth book in the Twilight series can not be any more eagerly anticipated. I have been slaking my thrist for more of this incredible story by rereading the first three novels over and over. Getting to read number four will be amazing! I can not wait to see what happens to these characters that I feel as if I know personally.
Only three hours until I get my hands on this baby!)
I have just finished reading this last novel of the Twilight series and I am breathless, emotionally drained and spent. Why isn't there six or ten stars to give this book? What an amazing way to wrap up the series! I was speeding through the pages, reading as fast as I could to find out what would happen next. The twists had me every time (Bella pregnant?! Jacob imprinting on her daughter?!) and what I was hoping (Bella turning into a vampire, her amazing power and control) left me satisfied. The only thing I was wondering about is Bella's reaction to blood. In all the other books she gets woozey and faints but in this one she is drinking it down for the baby before she is a vampire. Maybe because it was not inflicted by a cut she was okay with it, it came in a cup so she did not have to see it? Just wondering.
One thing that I was so suprised to learn as I plowed through was that I was no longer thinking of Bella as a teenager, only 18 and so young. She turned into a young married wife and mother as I read on and the transformation make perfect sense. She truely matches Edward's old soul quality. The two of them are never more perfect for each other than in this book. And adding a child to their love intensified their bond for me. Although I would have liked to have seen a bit more interaction between Edward and his daughter (plus I am still mystified at Rosalie's role and why Bella turned to her for help...perhaps on my second read through it will become more clear)
I am also very impressed with the tasteful way Stephenie Meyer dealt with the sex in the book. She made it so we all knew what she was implying without coming right out and saying it. Perfectly discreet for her younger readers and enough of a tease for us older ones. :)
I admit I was initially disappointed with Jacob's part as narrator. I enjoy seeing things from Bella's perspective. But when I reached the end of that part of the book, after he had imprinted on Renesmee, I understood why it was vital for him to tell his side of the story at that moment. Because that is where his love for Bella finally changed and matched her own, solving the love triangle problem.
The last part of the book had me on the edge of my seat. It was so wonderful to meet the other vampires and their unique talents. And the standoff against the Volturi had me alternately bawling and holding my breath. Such drama and passion. I loved it! The resolution, while good for now, makes me wonder if perhaps their may be more books in the future featuring Bella and Edward's young daughter and Jacob as the narrators having to deal with a rebuffed Volturi.
All in all, I thought the book was a fitting way to wrap up the series. I know after reading a bunch of comments about this book several people are very disappointed in the turn of events but I think everything fit perfectly. I will enjoy reading it again and picking up things I may have missed. And then in December of 2008 we have the movie and the Twilight Guide to look forward to!(less)
The last book of the series. You would think this would all get better, eh? It hasn't for the most part. But yeah, there is a happy ending (no doubt about it). Yeah, they DO IT (Bitchface and Edtard). Yeah, Bella turns into a vampire. How come I'm not surprised? The novel ended all too neat and too predictable. But in the middle of the book, there was a whole load of unfortunate and turning events going on. And no, I didn't see THAT one coming...
In the beginning of the book, Bella is bitching (o...more The last book of the series. You would think this would all get better, eh? It hasn't for the most part. But yeah, there is a happy ending (no doubt about it). Yeah, they DO IT (Bitchface and Edtard). Yeah, Bella turns into a vampire. How come I'm not surprised? The novel ended all too neat and too predictable. But in the middle of the book, there was a whole load of unfortunate and turning events going on. And no, I didn't see THAT one coming...
In the beginning of the book, Bella is bitching (of course) about this really awesome car Edward brought for her that many people are asking about (good way to start, amirite?). She and the Cullens are planning the big wedding day, and she's also bitching about that. She just wants everything to get over with it so she can DO IT with her beloved vampire 'lover.' However, she hasn't told her father or her mother that she's getting married yet. When she finally does, she tells her father first (with Edward along her side). His reaction was just unbelievable. He wasn't comfortable with the idea, but he accepted it. WHAT!? YOUR DAUGHTER'S MARRYING SOME SPARKLY BOY THAT SHE'S ONLY KNOWN FOR A YEAR. SHE ONLY WANTS TO DO IT WITH HIM BADLY. The once, strict Charlie that wasn't too crazy about Edward has vanished into thin air. And then Bella tells her mother she's getting married. Her mother assumes that it's right for Bella because she's always making "good" choices for herself. If only you knew, Renee. If only you knew.
So then, we speed things up to the wedding. I admit, I was dazzled when I was reading it, but it's only because I ignored the fact it was Bella and Edward's and made them change positions with my boyfriend and I (silly, I know). The wedding starts to get more interesting when Jacob comes (yaaay). He dances with Bella and she casually tells him she will be having a honeymoon. Jacob worries about Bella, because she might get killed by Edward when they're DOING IT. Alas, she doesn't listen. Edward the meanie had to escort Jacob away. >( All in all, I had only one complaint for this. The wedding was written very short.
Next, we go to the honeymoon. Finally, Bella can fulfill her wishes and have dreamy sex with her new husband. But that's all she cares about though. That's the reason why she's even married to him, just to have her lustful, selfish ways with him. Edward refuses to have sex with her at first, since he thinks he'll hurt her, but Bella the sex-obsessed puppy doesn't care. She acts like a friggin' horn dog for crying out loud. They finally do it, but we never get the details on it (sorry for all you erotica fans out there). In the morning, Bella's awoken with bruises everywhere courtesy of Edward. He even ate a pillow because the sex was so immense. LOL.
Bella wants to do it again (hormonal, much?), but Edward does not. Bella practically cries and begs to have Edward make rough love to her. D; They do it again. This time, Edward breaks the bed. And an amount of days later, Bella starts vomiting and getting her period late. She also has a big bump on her stomach. This probably means she has cancer, or Edward has super mutant sperm after all those years of being a virgin.
Bella is pregnant. Their honeymoon is over. They go back to the Cullens to get an abortion, but Bella doesn't want one. Edward thinks the little freak inside her will kill her, since it's half vampire. Bella doesn't want to hear the fact that her little precious bundle of a monster might be "killed." It's giving a secret pro-life message, I tell ya! I thought vampires weren't suppose to have babies though. Stephenie Meyer has even broken her own rules in order to make this all go happy.
We got into Jacob's point-of-view now. His point-of-view isn't so great, infact, it's superlame. He talks to other werewolves telepathically and that gets very annoying after awhile. He gets news about Bella being killer pregnant and then he hurriedly comes by her side. We could see Bella isn't looking so good and that the little 'nudger' is doing more damage to her. Edward tells Jacob to try to convince Bella to get rid of it and have another baby, but this time, with Jacob. First of all, WHAT ARE YOU DOING EDWARD!? Shouldn't you be talking to this with Bella first, to see if she'll be okay with the idea!? AND JACOB, why are you agreeing to this!? I know Edward wants to protect her, but c'mon! Let Jacob move on already! He doesn't need this.
Of course, Bella doesn't agree to this. She clearly states to Jacob that she rather have Edward's baby, than some "stranger's" (he didn't clarify). So then, Bella's bones get broken by this baby. Y'know, at this point, I'm getting tired of everything revolving around Bella. It's making me feel sick just listening to everyone tend to that ungrateful, unappreciative broad. She's not a heroine, and never was. She's just a retard who can't make proper decisions for being an 18 year old.
So then more stuff happens about Jacob that really doesn't matter. And then Bella gives violent birth to a baby girl that she named "Renesmee" (how do you even pronounce that!?). Seriously, the birth scene was so disgusting to read about. She drinks blood for her baby, and she enjoyed it. BLEEEEEEH. Bella is then dying, but Edward finally turns her into a sexy vampire. They take Nessie (Jacob's nickname for Renesmee) away because they're afraid Bella might hurt her, since Nessie's half-human. But Bella's aware of this, so she doesn't have those side effects that newcomer vampires have when they're newcomers. Mary-Sue FOREVA. Those two don't even have a mother/daughter bond! They're not that into each other. Jacob and Rosalie are more caring of Nessie than Bella is. And what's worse is that Jacob IMPRINTED on Nessie. WHAT THE FUCK, JACOB!? That screams out pedophile. I don't care what the fangirls say. It's pedophilia.
We go back to Bella's point-of-view. More shit happens, like her first hunt, she has lame-ass powers, she does it with Edward again, and Nessie fully physically matures after 6 days. Again, what the fuck!? Bella loved it even more when she did it with Edward as a vampire. If you could've done and loved it more when you're a vampire, WHY DIDN'T YOU BEFORE TURN INTO ONE BEFORE!? I don't really care about the events going on with the Voultri because they're very unimportant. I just skipped towards the ending. And, oh yes, there's a happy ending. They continued peacefully into their small, but "perfect" piece of whatever.
The whole novel sucks. My love for Jacob totally went down 100 points, Nessie was just a plot device, and Bella and Edward live on forever. EVERYONE'S FUCKING HAPPY. I don't get why some twi-hard fans are in love with this book! They're only preoccupied with the happy ending! It went from a high-school romance,into a bloody-love fest. This whole Twilight series officially sucks ass. This was all to expected, and all too obvious. I hope Stephenie Meyer loses a lot of fans with this crap......(less)
In the beginning of the book, Bella is bitching (o...more The last book of the series. You would think this would all get better, eh? It hasn't for the most part. But yeah, there is a happy ending (no doubt about it). Yeah, they DO IT (Bitchface and Edtard). Yeah, Bella turns into a vampire. How come I'm not surprised? The novel ended all too neat and too predictable. But in the middle of the book, there was a whole load of unfortunate and turning events going on. And no, I didn't see THAT one coming...
In the beginning of the book, Bella is bitching (of course) about this really awesome car Edward brought for her that many people are asking about (good way to start, amirite?). She and the Cullens are planning the big wedding day, and she's also bitching about that. She just wants everything to get over with it so she can DO IT with her beloved vampire 'lover.' However, she hasn't told her father or her mother that she's getting married yet. When she finally does, she tells her father first (with Edward along her side). His reaction was just unbelievable. He wasn't comfortable with the idea, but he accepted it. WHAT!? YOUR DAUGHTER'S MARRYING SOME SPARKLY BOY THAT SHE'S ONLY KNOWN FOR A YEAR. SHE ONLY WANTS TO DO IT WITH HIM BADLY. The once, strict Charlie that wasn't too crazy about Edward has vanished into thin air. And then Bella tells her mother she's getting married. Her mother assumes that it's right for Bella because she's always making "good" choices for herself. If only you knew, Renee. If only you knew.
So then, we speed things up to the wedding. I admit, I was dazzled when I was reading it, but it's only because I ignored the fact it was Bella and Edward's and made them change positions with my boyfriend and I (silly, I know). The wedding starts to get more interesting when Jacob comes (yaaay). He dances with Bella and she casually tells him she will be having a honeymoon. Jacob worries about Bella, because she might get killed by Edward when they're DOING IT. Alas, she doesn't listen. Edward the meanie had to escort Jacob away. >( All in all, I had only one complaint for this. The wedding was written very short.
Next, we go to the honeymoon. Finally, Bella can fulfill her wishes and have dreamy sex with her new husband. But that's all she cares about though. That's the reason why she's even married to him, just to have her lustful, selfish ways with him. Edward refuses to have sex with her at first, since he thinks he'll hurt her, but Bella the sex-obsessed puppy doesn't care. She acts like a friggin' horn dog for crying out loud. They finally do it, but we never get the details on it (sorry for all you erotica fans out there). In the morning, Bella's awoken with bruises everywhere courtesy of Edward. He even ate a pillow because the sex was so immense. LOL.
Bella wants to do it again (hormonal, much?), but Edward does not. Bella practically cries and begs to have Edward make rough love to her. D; They do it again. This time, Edward breaks the bed. And an amount of days later, Bella starts vomiting and getting her period late. She also has a big bump on her stomach. This probably means she has cancer, or Edward has super mutant sperm after all those years of being a virgin.
Bella is pregnant. Their honeymoon is over. They go back to the Cullens to get an abortion, but Bella doesn't want one. Edward thinks the little freak inside her will kill her, since it's half vampire. Bella doesn't want to hear the fact that her little precious bundle of a monster might be "killed." It's giving a secret pro-life message, I tell ya! I thought vampires weren't suppose to have babies though. Stephenie Meyer has even broken her own rules in order to make this all go happy.
We got into Jacob's point-of-view now. His point-of-view isn't so great, infact, it's superlame. He talks to other werewolves telepathically and that gets very annoying after awhile. He gets news about Bella being killer pregnant and then he hurriedly comes by her side. We could see Bella isn't looking so good and that the little 'nudger' is doing more damage to her. Edward tells Jacob to try to convince Bella to get rid of it and have another baby, but this time, with Jacob. First of all, WHAT ARE YOU DOING EDWARD!? Shouldn't you be talking to this with Bella first, to see if she'll be okay with the idea!? AND JACOB, why are you agreeing to this!? I know Edward wants to protect her, but c'mon! Let Jacob move on already! He doesn't need this.
Of course, Bella doesn't agree to this. She clearly states to Jacob that she rather have Edward's baby, than some "stranger's" (he didn't clarify). So then, Bella's bones get broken by this baby. Y'know, at this point, I'm getting tired of everything revolving around Bella. It's making me feel sick just listening to everyone tend to that ungrateful, unappreciative broad. She's not a heroine, and never was. She's just a retard who can't make proper decisions for being an 18 year old.
So then more stuff happens about Jacob that really doesn't matter. And then Bella gives violent birth to a baby girl that she named "Renesmee" (how do you even pronounce that!?). Seriously, the birth scene was so disgusting to read about. She drinks blood for her baby, and she enjoyed it. BLEEEEEEH. Bella is then dying, but Edward finally turns her into a sexy vampire. They take Nessie (Jacob's nickname for Renesmee) away because they're afraid Bella might hurt her, since Nessie's half-human. But Bella's aware of this, so she doesn't have those side effects that newcomer vampires have when they're newcomers. Mary-Sue FOREVA. Those two don't even have a mother/daughter bond! They're not that into each other. Jacob and Rosalie are more caring of Nessie than Bella is. And what's worse is that Jacob IMPRINTED on Nessie. WHAT THE FUCK, JACOB!? That screams out pedophile. I don't care what the fangirls say. It's pedophilia.
We go back to Bella's point-of-view. More shit happens, like her first hunt, she has lame-ass powers, she does it with Edward again, and Nessie fully physically matures after 6 days. Again, what the fuck!? Bella loved it even more when she did it with Edward as a vampire. If you could've done and loved it more when you're a vampire, WHY DIDN'T YOU BEFORE TURN INTO ONE BEFORE!? I don't really care about the events going on with the Voultri because they're very unimportant. I just skipped towards the ending. And, oh yes, there's a happy ending. They continued peacefully into their small, but "perfect" piece of whatever.
The whole novel sucks. My love for Jacob totally went down 100 points, Nessie was just a plot device, and Bella and Edward live on forever. EVERYONE'S FUCKING HAPPY. I don't get why some twi-hard fans are in love with this book! They're only preoccupied with the happy ending! It went from a high-school romance,into a bloody-love fest. This whole Twilight series officially sucks ass. This was all to expected, and all too obvious. I hope Stephenie Meyer loses a lot of fans with this crap......(less)
58 likes · like · see review
J.N.
I wouldn't recommend it to elementary kids. It's a young adult book so that's typically, what, 14-early 20ish? It depends on the reader, but yeah, the...more
I wouldn't recommend it to elementary kids. It's a young adult book so that's typically, what, 14-early 20ish? It depends on the reader, but yeah, there's one really agonizing scene (the sex scene is pretty much glossed over) that I don't think most kids can handle at that age.(less)
Jun 13, 2012 09:45pm
Jun 13, 2012 09:45pm
Cheryl
Oh my god! I'm sure reading your review is 1000x more interesting than reading the book. Way to go!
Nov 15, 2012 08:54am
Nov 15, 2012 08:54am
Aug 09, 2008
Shamae
rated it
5 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Anybody
Recommended to Shamae by:
Thanks Wendy for getting me hooked on this series!
Ok now that more people have read this book, here is my long review. Be prepared to read a novel. :D I will divide this into 2 sections. The first part is my original review w/out spoilers. The second part contains spoilers.
**No Spoilers**
Well, Stephenie Meyer has done it again. I loved this novel just as much as the first three. Let's face it, most of her books are fairly predictable; however, she has a talent of making the predictable happen in unexpected ways. This is exactly what happens in...more Ok now that more people have read this book, here is my long review. Be prepared to read a novel. :D I will divide this into 2 sections. The first part is my original review w/out spoilers. The second part contains spoilers.
**No Spoilers**
Well, Stephenie Meyer has done it again. I loved this novel just as much as the first three. Let's face it, most of her books are fairly predictable; however, she has a talent of making the predictable happen in unexpected ways. This is exactly what happens in Breaking Dawn. Well done Stephenie. Like her other novels, this took me less than 24 hours to read.
The biggest critique I have is one that many have mentioned before, I am bothered by the amount of whining and seemingly ungrateful attitude Bella has most of the time but I have realized this is just her personality. In the 4th book the whining does get less frequent about half way through the novel. Anyway happy reading to those who have yet to indulge in the final book of this saga.
**Spoilers Below!**
I have loved all the books. I grew very attached to the characters. These books, however, are all fairly predictable. For example in book 1, you knew Edward was going to save Bella from James but you didn't know how. Book 2-You knew Edward had to come back and you knew he wasn't going to die, but you didn't know how it would work out. Book 3-You knew she was going to pick Edward over Jacob but you didn't realize the extent of her feelings. And you knew they would defeat the newborns, but you didn't know the cost of that fight. Book 4-You knew Bella and Edward were going to live happily ever after, but not how this would happen. This is where Stephenie Meyer, in my opinion, shines. The books are fairly predictable BUT she makes the predictable happen in unexpected ways. That takes talent.
1-I loved the first part of the book (although Bella's constant whining about the wedding preparations got annoying. You know you have to wear a white dress so get over it!) I loved the honeymoon scenes. I have heard several complaints that books 3 and 4 were too sexual. Here is my comparison: They are like the Harry Potter Books, each one gets a little darker and directed at a slightly older audience. Meyer's books are no different. I also think her love scenes were very tastefully done, nothing to descriptive, leaving plenty for the imagination if one wants to dwell on it or, if one doesn't, you can read it w/out having to read descriptions. It was great for both sides. I think she played the sex card very well and very tactful.
2-The pregnancy totally threw me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I love how Edward reacted. It was perfect for him to be more concerned about Bella than his child as well as to go into vampire shock. That is just who Edward is. Bella's reaction surprised me though. I guess those maternal instincts kicked in. I was just expecting more of a "Holy crap I am 18 and pregnant" reaction. By the way I loved the whole "Why am I covered in feather's scene?"
3-The book 2 part of Breaking Dawn took a while to get into. I wasn't expecting to jump into Jacob's perspective. But, after I got used to it, I loved the change of pace with how he talks and views things. I loved his chapter headings as well--they were funny. I liked seeing her pregnancy through his eyes. Through Bella's it would have been the same emotions over and over, whereas, with Jacob, we got to experience several different emotional facets.
4-The pack splitting up. Although this was a side story, it threw me but I liked how it ended up. Jacob always needed to be the Alpha. I was glad to see him step up to the plate.
5-The birth was really well done. I liked that it wasn't a perfect delivery, although the earlier chapters strongly alluded to the fact that it would not be easy. The reason I loved this so much is because, in all the other books, Edward didn't want to change Bella because he didn't want to end her life. Well, he didn't have to end her life, he saved it. I thought this was perfect. I do wish that Bella had screamed more during the transformation, not because I want her to be in pain, just because it would have been more realistic. I was also surprised that the baby was a girl...I was expecting a boy. The name is weird but fitting. I am slightly bothered that Renesmee is advancing so quickly. I thought the books have had a great balance between fantasy and romance. Nessie developing so quickly kicks the fantasy notch up a bit and I didn't love that.
6-Charlie's reactions to everything were weird. He was just too calm for Charlie, it was out of character. Maybe he did this because Bella is now married and he no longer has stewardship over her but I still think he should have reacted differently.
7-It bothered me that Bella seemed to have perfect control over her thirst, again, I didn't want to see her slaughter the town, but I wish Meyer had made that first scene with Charlie (after her change) be more tempting. Like maybe have to have Bella leave for an hour because she wants to drink Charlie's blood so badly or something. Meyer just made it too easy. There was the pain in the throat but it should have been more than that especially since the other books had given us a certain buildup of newborn life. On the other hand, if Bella had gone AWOL with blood drinking, it would have not fit either. It is a fine line and I think Meyer erred on the side of caution.
8-Jacob imprinting on Renesmee. Weird but fitting. Jacob can't have Bella but he has the next best thing and now Jacob and Bella's relationship can finally be what I always wanted it to be. Maybe this part will bother those fans rooting for Jacob, but I have always been an Edward girl at heart and this was a nice touch. It makes sense in an odd sort of way.
9-The fight scene was suspenseful. I honestly didn't know how it would play out. Obviously I didn't think Bella or Edward would die but I didn't know about anyone else. Also, when Alice and Jasper ran away I figured they were trying to help but I didn't know how. I figured she was putting her love for Jasper over that of her family, which, considering they are married, makes sense. I liked this twist and I LOVED how it came together at the end when Alice brought the evidence back. I think I would have liked a little more fighting, like with the newborns in book 3, but this works too. The fact that none of the Volturi were killed leaves things open for another book possibly through Renesmee's eyes. I think that would be fantastic! We would still get to "see" Edward and Bella again, but we would also get to know Nessie better.
10-Bella's power. I really think it is a great power and perfect for her. She has always felt like she was the burden, she couldn't protect herself or anyone else, well now she can. I loved it.
11-I am torn on this next comment. I feel like Bella just gets everything handed to her in this book. There wasn't quite the emotional pull in this book as in the others, or rather it is different. I am sure in book 2 when Edward left, all our hearts sunk. It was really an emotional experience. I think, in order to write really believable characters, you have to have these types of pain. This didn't happen as strongly in Book 4. I think there needed to be more loss, or at least more struggles. Make her thirst more powerful or have (the thought is scary) but have someone die. Or have her make some type of choice. I feel like Meyer did hand Bella too much without the struggles.
12-This next point is such a minor detail, I shouldn't even mention it but during Bella's first hunt, she is originally hunting elk and she finds a nice big buck (before she catches the hunter's scent). My problem is that male elk are not called bucks, they are called bulls. Male deer are bucks. I know it is trivial but it bugged me a bit because it seems an error like that could have been caught by the numerous editing processes. Oh well, its so trivial.
So to gather all my thoughts, I really loved the book. I liked the elements of surprise. I love how Meyer makes the predictable happen in unexpected ways. I like how she tied all the loose ends up and made it a happily ever after but still left the story line open to new adventures with new characters. I love that Jacob is finally happy, even if his imprinting was a bit strange. The twists were great and made the book a page turner. Are there things I think she could have done better, well sure, but that comes with any book. Overall, she did a great job and I am sad to see the saga end. Now I am anticipating Midnight Sun. There won't be anything new because we all know what happens, but it will be interesting to read it through Edward's eyes. Stephenie Meyer has a rough draft of chapter 1 on her website. Check it out, it will be good.
For now, in my head, I will imagine the Cullen family living happily in Forks. I am assuming they will have to leave soon because of their lack of aging, but I'd like to think their travels will always bring them home. Well done Stephenie for a great series. My husband and I are forever fans.(less)
**No Spoilers**
Well, Stephenie Meyer has done it again. I loved this novel just as much as the first three. Let's face it, most of her books are fairly predictable; however, she has a talent of making the predictable happen in unexpected ways. This is exactly what happens in...more Ok now that more people have read this book, here is my long review. Be prepared to read a novel. :D I will divide this into 2 sections. The first part is my original review w/out spoilers. The second part contains spoilers.
**No Spoilers**
Well, Stephenie Meyer has done it again. I loved this novel just as much as the first three. Let's face it, most of her books are fairly predictable; however, she has a talent of making the predictable happen in unexpected ways. This is exactly what happens in Breaking Dawn. Well done Stephenie. Like her other novels, this took me less than 24 hours to read.
The biggest critique I have is one that many have mentioned before, I am bothered by the amount of whining and seemingly ungrateful attitude Bella has most of the time but I have realized this is just her personality. In the 4th book the whining does get less frequent about half way through the novel. Anyway happy reading to those who have yet to indulge in the final book of this saga.
**Spoilers Below!**
I have loved all the books. I grew very attached to the characters. These books, however, are all fairly predictable. For example in book 1, you knew Edward was going to save Bella from James but you didn't know how. Book 2-You knew Edward had to come back and you knew he wasn't going to die, but you didn't know how it would work out. Book 3-You knew she was going to pick Edward over Jacob but you didn't realize the extent of her feelings. And you knew they would defeat the newborns, but you didn't know the cost of that fight. Book 4-You knew Bella and Edward were going to live happily ever after, but not how this would happen. This is where Stephenie Meyer, in my opinion, shines. The books are fairly predictable BUT she makes the predictable happen in unexpected ways. That takes talent.
1-I loved the first part of the book (although Bella's constant whining about the wedding preparations got annoying. You know you have to wear a white dress so get over it!) I loved the honeymoon scenes. I have heard several complaints that books 3 and 4 were too sexual. Here is my comparison: They are like the Harry Potter Books, each one gets a little darker and directed at a slightly older audience. Meyer's books are no different. I also think her love scenes were very tastefully done, nothing to descriptive, leaving plenty for the imagination if one wants to dwell on it or, if one doesn't, you can read it w/out having to read descriptions. It was great for both sides. I think she played the sex card very well and very tactful.
2-The pregnancy totally threw me. I wasn't expecting this at all. I love how Edward reacted. It was perfect for him to be more concerned about Bella than his child as well as to go into vampire shock. That is just who Edward is. Bella's reaction surprised me though. I guess those maternal instincts kicked in. I was just expecting more of a "Holy crap I am 18 and pregnant" reaction. By the way I loved the whole "Why am I covered in feather's scene?"
3-The book 2 part of Breaking Dawn took a while to get into. I wasn't expecting to jump into Jacob's perspective. But, after I got used to it, I loved the change of pace with how he talks and views things. I loved his chapter headings as well--they were funny. I liked seeing her pregnancy through his eyes. Through Bella's it would have been the same emotions over and over, whereas, with Jacob, we got to experience several different emotional facets.
4-The pack splitting up. Although this was a side story, it threw me but I liked how it ended up. Jacob always needed to be the Alpha. I was glad to see him step up to the plate.
5-The birth was really well done. I liked that it wasn't a perfect delivery, although the earlier chapters strongly alluded to the fact that it would not be easy. The reason I loved this so much is because, in all the other books, Edward didn't want to change Bella because he didn't want to end her life. Well, he didn't have to end her life, he saved it. I thought this was perfect. I do wish that Bella had screamed more during the transformation, not because I want her to be in pain, just because it would have been more realistic. I was also surprised that the baby was a girl...I was expecting a boy. The name is weird but fitting. I am slightly bothered that Renesmee is advancing so quickly. I thought the books have had a great balance between fantasy and romance. Nessie developing so quickly kicks the fantasy notch up a bit and I didn't love that.
6-Charlie's reactions to everything were weird. He was just too calm for Charlie, it was out of character. Maybe he did this because Bella is now married and he no longer has stewardship over her but I still think he should have reacted differently.
7-It bothered me that Bella seemed to have perfect control over her thirst, again, I didn't want to see her slaughter the town, but I wish Meyer had made that first scene with Charlie (after her change) be more tempting. Like maybe have to have Bella leave for an hour because she wants to drink Charlie's blood so badly or something. Meyer just made it too easy. There was the pain in the throat but it should have been more than that especially since the other books had given us a certain buildup of newborn life. On the other hand, if Bella had gone AWOL with blood drinking, it would have not fit either. It is a fine line and I think Meyer erred on the side of caution.
8-Jacob imprinting on Renesmee. Weird but fitting. Jacob can't have Bella but he has the next best thing and now Jacob and Bella's relationship can finally be what I always wanted it to be. Maybe this part will bother those fans rooting for Jacob, but I have always been an Edward girl at heart and this was a nice touch. It makes sense in an odd sort of way.
9-The fight scene was suspenseful. I honestly didn't know how it would play out. Obviously I didn't think Bella or Edward would die but I didn't know about anyone else. Also, when Alice and Jasper ran away I figured they were trying to help but I didn't know how. I figured she was putting her love for Jasper over that of her family, which, considering they are married, makes sense. I liked this twist and I LOVED how it came together at the end when Alice brought the evidence back. I think I would have liked a little more fighting, like with the newborns in book 3, but this works too. The fact that none of the Volturi were killed leaves things open for another book possibly through Renesmee's eyes. I think that would be fantastic! We would still get to "see" Edward and Bella again, but we would also get to know Nessie better.
10-Bella's power. I really think it is a great power and perfect for her. She has always felt like she was the burden, she couldn't protect herself or anyone else, well now she can. I loved it.
11-I am torn on this next comment. I feel like Bella just gets everything handed to her in this book. There wasn't quite the emotional pull in this book as in the others, or rather it is different. I am sure in book 2 when Edward left, all our hearts sunk. It was really an emotional experience. I think, in order to write really believable characters, you have to have these types of pain. This didn't happen as strongly in Book 4. I think there needed to be more loss, or at least more struggles. Make her thirst more powerful or have (the thought is scary) but have someone die. Or have her make some type of choice. I feel like Meyer did hand Bella too much without the struggles.
12-This next point is such a minor detail, I shouldn't even mention it but during Bella's first hunt, she is originally hunting elk and she finds a nice big buck (before she catches the hunter's scent). My problem is that male elk are not called bucks, they are called bulls. Male deer are bucks. I know it is trivial but it bugged me a bit because it seems an error like that could have been caught by the numerous editing processes. Oh well, its so trivial.
So to gather all my thoughts, I really loved the book. I liked the elements of surprise. I love how Meyer makes the predictable happen in unexpected ways. I like how she tied all the loose ends up and made it a happily ever after but still left the story line open to new adventures with new characters. I love that Jacob is finally happy, even if his imprinting was a bit strange. The twists were great and made the book a page turner. Are there things I think she could have done better, well sure, but that comes with any book. Overall, she did a great job and I am sad to see the saga end. Now I am anticipating Midnight Sun. There won't be anything new because we all know what happens, but it will be interesting to read it through Edward's eyes. Stephenie Meyer has a rough draft of chapter 1 on her website. Check it out, it will be good.
For now, in my head, I will imagine the Cullen family living happily in Forks. I am assuming they will have to leave soon because of their lack of aging, but I'd like to think their travels will always bring them home. Well done Stephenie for a great series. My husband and I are forever fans.(less)
Okay, here is what I think might happen in book four....
First, I think her bite from James in book one is going to make her immune to Edward's "venom" when he does attempt to "change" her into a vampire, kind of like a vaccination. Second, I think she might get pregnant in that short time between the wedding and the "change"...and if that happens, will Edward still be able to change her (who would have known...vampires have never tried to mate with humans). Third, if she does have a baby, it mig...more Okay, here is what I think might happen in book four....
First, I think her bite from James in book one is going to make her immune to Edward's "venom" when he does attempt to "change" her into a vampire, kind of like a vaccination. Second, I think she might get pregnant in that short time between the wedding and the "change"...and if that happens, will Edward still be able to change her (who would have known...vampires have never tried to mate with humans). Third, if she does have a baby, it might be a girl and it would totally complicate everything if Jacob imprints on her!
Just speculation...it will be interesting to see how she ends the series.(less)
First, I think her bite from James in book one is going to make her immune to Edward's "venom" when he does attempt to "change" her into a vampire, kind of like a vaccination. Second, I think she might get pregnant in that short time between the wedding and the "change"...and if that happens, will Edward still be able to change her (who would have known...vampires have never tried to mate with humans). Third, if she does have a baby, it mig...more Okay, here is what I think might happen in book four....
First, I think her bite from James in book one is going to make her immune to Edward's "venom" when he does attempt to "change" her into a vampire, kind of like a vaccination. Second, I think she might get pregnant in that short time between the wedding and the "change"...and if that happens, will Edward still be able to change her (who would have known...vampires have never tried to mate with humans). Third, if she does have a baby, it might be a girl and it would totally complicate everything if Jacob imprints on her!
Just speculation...it will be interesting to see how she ends the series.(less)
The more I think about this book, the less I like it, which is (obviously) the opposite of how it should work. But this book read like poorly written fan-fiction - both prose and the plot! - and there was very little to like. The writing was just okay (like the previous books), the plot was beyond stupid, all the "twists" were obvious (nothing "subtle" about the foreshadowing...), etc. etc. How did this book get published?!? Even the ending was a huge let down; virtually nothing of interest happ...more
The more I think about this book, the less I like it, which is (obviously) the opposite of how it should work. But this book read like poorly written fan-fiction - both prose and the plot! - and there was very little to like. The writing was just okay (like the previous books), the plot was beyond stupid, all the "twists" were obvious (nothing "subtle" about the foreshadowing...), etc. etc. How did this book get published?!? Even the ending was a huge let down; virtually nothing of interest happened and all possibly interesting conflicts were glossed over. Bella wants to become a vampire and should be having difficult as a "newborn" and giving up her old life... but that all went smoother than anticipated! What a cop out. In fact, the whole book fell under that category...
The characters were less likable than in previous books and it was actually painful to read about Bella, Edward, and Jacob. How, I wondered time and time again, could a person be so stupid? Parts were creepy (not in a good way...), parts were icky, and parts were just so bad that I wanted to burn the book. I am cringing right now just thinking about it all. I can't even begin to list all the times I wanted to put down the book but didn't because I kept thinking it had to get better and that if I wanted to discuss this mess with others, I should finish the whole thing, just to see how it ends. Oh, and the name "Renesmee"???? A HUGE "wtf" is in order here!
Aside from the mind-numbing plot and no character development, I also hated the way everything just worked out. Bella didn't have to give up anything to have everything she wanted and the stakes were pretty much non-existent, even though I think I was supposed to feel that all their lives were in danger. Even Bella's dad was kind of like, "Ok, I'll be kept in the dark about everything! It's all fine!" Uh, what? No conflict? Nothing of interest? Nope - everything was glossed over. Cop out. It was all just so boring. And pretty weak for what's supposed to be the final book in a popular series. Very, very disappointing. Although in one regard it succeeded - I don't want to read anything more in the series by this author, not after this book! So it did cement the series shut, just probably not in the way the author hoped.
I am at least glad I just checked this out of the library; I feel sorry for those who bought it! It's probably hard to write a final book in a series and please readers, but this one didn't even come close to being half decent. It makes me sad to think how many copies this book has probably sold...(less)
The characters were less likable than in previous books and it was actually painful to read about Bella, Edward, and Jacob. How, I wondered time and time again, could a person be so stupid? Parts were creepy (not in a good way...), parts were icky, and parts were just so bad that I wanted to burn the book. I am cringing right now just thinking about it all. I can't even begin to list all the times I wanted to put down the book but didn't because I kept thinking it had to get better and that if I wanted to discuss this mess with others, I should finish the whole thing, just to see how it ends. Oh, and the name "Renesmee"???? A HUGE "wtf" is in order here!
Aside from the mind-numbing plot and no character development, I also hated the way everything just worked out. Bella didn't have to give up anything to have everything she wanted and the stakes were pretty much non-existent, even though I think I was supposed to feel that all their lives were in danger. Even Bella's dad was kind of like, "Ok, I'll be kept in the dark about everything! It's all fine!" Uh, what? No conflict? Nothing of interest? Nope - everything was glossed over. Cop out. It was all just so boring. And pretty weak for what's supposed to be the final book in a popular series. Very, very disappointing. Although in one regard it succeeded - I don't want to read anything more in the series by this author, not after this book! So it did cement the series shut, just probably not in the way the author hoped.
I am at least glad I just checked this out of the library; I feel sorry for those who bought it! It's probably hard to write a final book in a series and please readers, but this one didn't even come close to being half decent. It makes me sad to think how many copies this book has probably sold...(less)
| topics | posts | views | last activity | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| I love breaking dawn don't you | 28 | 51 | 44 minutes ago | |
| The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn | 124 | 65 | 1 hour, 43 min ago | |
| Pedophilia in the Twilight Saga | 257 | 922 | 2 hours, 22 min ago | |
| Is Jacob hot, or is Edward hotter? or seth? Movie and Book opinion please! | 25 | 83 | 2 hours, 58 min ago | |
| Who thinks Bella should have ended up with Jacob? | 54 | 106 | 2 hours, 59 min ago | |
| i hate reneseme ! | 389 | 1429 | 21 hours, 25 min ago | |
| The sex question in Twilight | 11 | 190 | May 19, 2013 08:03pm |
I was born in Connecticut in 1973, during a brief blip in my family's otherwise western U.S. existence. We were settled in Phoenix by the time I was four, and I think of myself as a native. The unusual spelling of my name was a gift from my father, Stephen (+ ie = me). Though I have had my name spelled wrong on pretty much everything my entire life long, I must admit that it makes it easier to goo...more
I was born in Connecticut in 1973, during a brief blip in my family's otherwise western U.S. existence. We were settled in Phoenix by the time I was four, and I think of myself as a native. The unusual spelling of my name was a gift from my father, Stephen (+ ie = me). Though I have had my name spelled wrong on pretty much everything my entire life long, I must admit that it makes it easier to google myself now.
I filled the "Jan Brady" spot in my family-the second of three girls. Unlike the Brady's, none of my three brothers are steps, and all of them are younger than all the girls. I went to high school in Scottsdale, Arizona, the kind of place where every fall a few girls would come back to school with new noses and there were Porsches in the student lot (for the record, I have my original nose, and never had a car until after I was in my twenties). I was awarded a National Merit Scholarship, and I used it to pay my way to Brigham Young University, in Provo, Utah. I majored in English, but concentrated on literature rather than creative writing, mostly because I didn't consider reading books "work" (as long as I was going to be doing something anyway, I might as well get course credit for it, right?).
I met my husband, Pancho (his real name is Christiaan), when I was four, but we were never anywhere close to being childhood sweethearts. In fact, though we saw each other at least weekly through church activities, I can't recall a single instance when we so much as greeted each other with a friendly wave, let alone exchanged actual words. This may have been for the best, because when we did eventually get around to exchanging words, sixteen years after our first meeting, it only took nine months from the first "hello" to the wedding. Of course, we were able to skip over a lot of the getting to know you parts (many of our conversations would go something like this: "This one time, when I was ten, I broke my hand at a party when-" "Yeah, I know what happened. I was there, remember?") We've been married for ten and a half years now, and have three beautiful, brilliant, wonderful boys who often remind me chimpanzees on crack. I can't write without music, and my biggest muse is, ironically enough, the band Muse. My other favorite sources of inspiration are Linkin Park, My Chemical Romance, Coldplay, The All American Rejects, Travis, The Strokes, Brand New, U2, Kasabian, Jimmy Eat World, and Weezer, to mention a few.(less)
More about Stephenie Meyer...
I filled the "Jan Brady" spot in my family-the second of three girls. Unlike the Brady's, none of my three brothers are steps, and all of them are younger than all the girls. I went to high school in Scottsdale, Arizona, the kind of place where every fall a few girls would come back to school with new noses and there were Porsches in the student lot (for the record, I have my original nose, and never had a car until after I was in my twenties). I was awarded a National Merit Scholarship, and I used it to pay my way to Brigham Young University, in Provo, Utah. I majored in English, but concentrated on literature rather than creative writing, mostly because I didn't consider reading books "work" (as long as I was going to be doing something anyway, I might as well get course credit for it, right?).
I met my husband, Pancho (his real name is Christiaan), when I was four, but we were never anywhere close to being childhood sweethearts. In fact, though we saw each other at least weekly through church activities, I can't recall a single instance when we so much as greeted each other with a friendly wave, let alone exchanged actual words. This may have been for the best, because when we did eventually get around to exchanging words, sixteen years after our first meeting, it only took nine months from the first "hello" to the wedding. Of course, we were able to skip over a lot of the getting to know you parts (many of our conversations would go something like this: "This one time, when I was ten, I broke my hand at a party when-" "Yeah, I know what happened. I was there, remember?") We've been married for ten and a half years now, and have three beautiful, brilliant, wonderful boys who often remind me chimpanzees on crack. I can't write without music, and my biggest muse is, ironically enough, the band Muse. My other favorite sources of inspiration are Linkin Park, My Chemical Romance, Coldplay, The All American Rejects, Travis, The Strokes, Brand New, U2, Kasabian, Jimmy Eat World, and Weezer, to mention a few.(less)
Share This Book
Facebook
Twitter
Your website
Share This Book on Your Website
| title link |
preview: Breaking Dawn |
| avg rating |
preview:  Breaking Dawn
Goodreads rating: 3.74 (698549 ratings) |
| small image |
preview: click here |
| med image |
preview: click here |
| BBCode |
494 trivia questions
60 quizzes
More quizzes & trivia...
60 quizzes
“Did you know that 'I told you so' has a brother,Jacob?" she asked cutting me off. "His name is 'Shut the hell up'.”
—
2,564 people liked it
“Hey, Rosalie? Do you know how to drown a blonde? Stick a mirror to the bottom of a pool.”
—
1,586 people liked it
More quotes…
Mar 29, 2013 12:54am
May 17, 2013 12:42pm