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28th out of 103 books
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272 voters
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The Kid: (What Happened After My Boyfriend and I Decided to Go Get Pregnant) an Adoption Story
by
Dan Savage
The syndicated sex advice columnist of "Savage Love" tells a no-holds-barred story of an ordinary American couple who want to have a baby, except that in this case, the couple happens to be Savage and his boyfriend.
Paperback, 246 pages
Published
June 1st 2000
by Plume Books
(first published 1999)
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Dan Savage brings the same frank, occasionally filthy voice familiar from his popular sex advice column and podcasts to his first book, published about a decade ago. Unfortunately, he also brings along his tendency to get sidetracked with political rants and his penchant for beating the same points into the ground over and over.
I really enjoyed the majority of this book, which tells the story of Dan and his boyfriend trying to adopt a child, the whole nerve-wracking process from rese...more
I really enjoyed the majority of this book, which tells the story of Dan and his boyfriend trying to adopt a child, the whole nerve-wracking process from rese...more
As a huge supporter of gay adoption/gay rights in general, this book instantly appealed. Honestly, I enjoy that feeling of smugness I get from reading something I agree with.
I think a book like this should be required reading for all the 'crazy fundies' out there. If Dan seems preachy sometimes it's only because we live in a society which refuses to let go of the whole gay issue - their sexuality must be near the forefront of the minds of gays and lesbians practically all of the time...more
I think a book like this should be required reading for all the 'crazy fundies' out there. If Dan seems preachy sometimes it's only because we live in a society which refuses to let go of the whole gay issue - their sexuality must be near the forefront of the minds of gays and lesbians practically all of the time...more
Non-Fiction. Dan Savage and his boyfriend decide to adopt a kid, and Savage takes us through all the subsequent paperwork, counseling, doctor appointments, and freakouts.
Savage often comes off as blunt and uncaring in his weekly sex advice column, but this shows his tender underbelly -- the Dan that loves his boyfriend and is excited about having a kid and who worries a lot, about everything. He's also a man who speaks openly about his sex life, the box of bondage gear in the basemen...more
Savage often comes off as blunt and uncaring in his weekly sex advice column, but this shows his tender underbelly -- the Dan that loves his boyfriend and is excited about having a kid and who worries a lot, about everything. He's also a man who speaks openly about his sex life, the box of bondage gear in the basemen...more
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I bought this book because I could not believe it when I saw it for sale in a town of 1200 in central Italy. I imagine that if I didn't speak English fluently, a few of the puns/wit would have been lost on me as they were literally translated into the Italian text. As luck would have it though, they could be added to my reading of the book. I suspect the common convertion of wit to acronym (as an easy method to carry over the joke over a while) would be lost on most people who don't know that as...more
My book group read this book. I imagine it would be a 5-star book for most couples who want to adopt, especially LGBT couples and couples planning an open adoption. To me, it was less compelling, but I enjoyed it and learned from it.
True to form, Savage the sexual advice columnist is savagely honest. For example, he admits that he wants a healthy infant, not "damaged goods" (he acknowledges how offensive that term is). But much of his honesty is hilarious, as with his descr...more
True to form, Savage the sexual advice columnist is savagely honest. For example, he admits that he wants a healthy infant, not "damaged goods" (he acknowledges how offensive that term is). But much of his honesty is hilarious, as with his descr...more
I don't generally read nonfiction. The real people are rarely as good as characters and the story is usually missing something. I always think, "this would be so much better if they embellished the truth a little and gave the story some direction." This book is one of the rare exceptions to that opinion. I love Dan Savage. His column is hilarious and every time I tune into his podcast I am thoroughly entertained. I also have a great deal of respect for him because of his recent creatio...more
Xexilia
rated it
Recommends it for:
Soon-to-be father's (Especially unplanned or adopting), pregnant women, Republicans
Recommended to Xexilia by:
No one, Dan Savage is funny.
Shelves:
books-that-rock,
humor
The Kid is a great book in support of gay and open adoptions, two very cool things. What's especially nice about this book is, thanks to Dan Savage's wit, it's worth reading for if only this; It is really funny. Dan doesn't discuss his relationship, the adoption, or parenting from a detached, pseudo-sophisticated fashion; He talks to you as if you'd been buddies for a while, now.
Dan Savage recounts everything; From the events leading to him meeting his boyfriend, to their dating,...more
Dan Savage recounts everything; From the events leading to him meeting his boyfriend, to their dating,...more
As with any Dan Savage writing, the Kid was hilariously entertaining. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it, and only give it 4 stars because it lacked the polish and broader appeal of The Commitment. I recommended The Commitment to my mom, and while she has enjoyed it, she found it a bit vulgar, and I definitely would not recommend The Kid to her.
Another interesting difference between the two books is Dan's portrayal of his mother. She is a main character in the Commitment, where she pla...more
Another interesting difference between the two books is Dan's portrayal of his mother. She is a main character in the Commitment, where she pla...more
This is, as the back of the book claims, a page turner. Savage is witty, often cynical, and occasionally so brutally honest about his personal life and motivations it gets a little uncomfortable -- but, as it turns out, the uncomfortableness usually has a point. He makes some cutting observations about the double standard that exists for adoptive parents (who must pass a long checklist of qualifications to be deemed fit parents) and bio-parents (who can simply go get pregnant).
The bo...more
The bo...more
This book gives me hope for the world. When Dan and his boyfriend set out to adopt their son, it was 1997, and no gay couples had ever successfully completed an adoption at their then radical open adoption agency. When they took their new son on plane rides, people would ask where their son's mom was. I'm not saying 2011 doesn't have plenty of issues of its own, but we're living in a world with gay couples in partnerships, in marriages (in some places), and adopting and having children through s...more
I would give this more of a 3.5 if that were a choice. By the end I couldn't put it down, but at times it was a little slow or choppy (He writes how he talks--which is a sin to some, a pleasure to me--but it can get a little muddled).
If you don't know who Dan Savage is, you should absolutely investigate it before you pick up this book; he is an acquired taste (I've read almost every column and am now working on catching up on his podcasts). You have to be quite comfortable with profu...more
If you don't know who Dan Savage is, you should absolutely investigate it before you pick up this book; he is an acquired taste (I've read almost every column and am now working on catching up on his podcasts). You have to be quite comfortable with profu...more
I love Dan Savage. So, this probably won't be an unbiased review. I think he's a really funny yet serious writer. And, he does more than tackle writing about current social issues, he lives them... then writes about them. This book especially, when he lays out his life with his boyfriend Terry and the course of their adoption.
He may be considered just a Sex Addvice columnist. But, Dan Savage is that, but so, so much more. He is good at looking at a relationship and evaluating f...more
He may be considered just a Sex Addvice columnist. But, Dan Savage is that, but so, so much more. He is good at looking at a relationship and evaluating f...more
In high school and college, I read Dan Savage's column religiously. At first, I would sneak a Pittsburgh City Paper around, open it to the last section, where "Savage Love" was sandwiched between ads for phone sex lines and escorts, read it quickly, and then toss the paper back in my bag or throw it away. It felt like a very illicit act to be reading his column at the age of 15.
So, I guess you could say I grew up reading Savage's work. I read his book The Commitment, about his wedding to his hus...more
So, I guess you could say I grew up reading Savage's work. I read his book The Commitment, about his wedding to his hus...more
Another great one by Dan Savage. I read "The Commitment" first, which takes place when the son they adopt in this is 6 years old. This is the story of deciding to adopt, choosing an "open adoption" (where the birth parents choose the adopting parents and remain in the kid's life), and all the drama that ensues.
Savage is much more in form as the sex advice columnist we all know and love. Makes for the kind of book you would expect from him. "The Commitment"...more
Savage is much more in form as the sex advice columnist we all know and love. Makes for the kind of book you would expect from him. "The Commitment"...more
This is a very good book: funny in a self-deprecating way, uncomfortably honest in a funny way, intelligently perceptive under a veneer of cynicism and comedic exaggeration, and seriously committed to family. (Savage makes a big deal about how much his Irish-Catholic roots influence him, and indeed there's a certain kinship with Frank McCourt, especially the way some of his self-putdowns really hurt and I think he's being too hard on himself.) I learned from this book, too, and when Ira Glass wr...more
I was recently introduced to Dan Savage's sex advice column, which is not for the faint of heart if you're a fairly conservative person! But what i like about Savage, a gay man with a syndicated column around the country, is how much he believes in being upfront and honest about who you are and what you want out of your partner. He just puts it all out there. In trying to learn more about Savage, I found this book.
It turns out, Savage is much more family-oriented than you might ...more
It turns out, Savage is much more family-oriented than you might ...more
Funny and touching and a fast read. Savage is an engaging writer, and this story grabbed me from the begining and kept me engaged the whole way through.
I have many gay friends and family members in my life, and in fact this was a holiday gift from one of them. He loved it and felt that it would give insight into some of the issues that he and his husband experienced as they tried to adopt (happily for everyone, successfully!) their first child. I can categorically state that he is...more
I have many gay friends and family members in my life, and in fact this was a holiday gift from one of them. He loved it and felt that it would give insight into some of the issues that he and his husband experienced as they tried to adopt (happily for everyone, successfully!) their first child. I can categorically state that he is...more
im still not convinced of open adoption. seems too tricky to me, not that anything about raising children is easy. Trying to incorporate the birth parents into the family while still maintaining your position as the legal parents and getting everybody to recognize that, and the whole thing with calling him "the kid" instead of by name, so as not to offend the birth mother, and then the birth father showing up out of nowhere, it seems that the adoptive parents have very little control. ...more
I enjoyed this book on two level. First, the story itself is complete engaging and when I was finished I googled Dan Savage and read anything that I could find that might give me information about what happened next. Fortunately there is a sequel of sorts that I'll be getting from my library soon. Second, if you are a writer looking to study the art of the chapter endings, check this book out. I was supposed to scavenge food for dinner and I was supposed to talk to my family and I was suppose...more
I've been a fan of Dan Savage for several years now, but never read any of his books. I wasn't sure how his writing style would go over for a full book. I was very happy to find that, I loved reading this book. It was a quick read, easy to go through and done too soon. I kinda wanted it to continue like a journal throughout all of D.J.'s life. Dan Savage describes his experiences in a very smart and humorous way as he and his boyfriend go through the process of open adoption. I especially liked ...more
I'm a hardcore junky when it comes to "This American Life", so naturally, after hearing Dan Savage on the show many times discussing his abhor for "The Suite Life of Zach and Cody", I was a fan. I dove into "The Kid" thinking it would be a touching story about a man and his boyfriend and the challenges a homosexual couple face trying to adopt. To my bemusement I found it savage indeed in it's literally balls out, honest summary of not only their adoption trials buto...more
Very much enjoyed reading of the relationship growing between Dan, Terry and Melissa, the homeless teen who is part of their open adoption. Very poignant and true. I did think the sections talking about the current situation of adoption, the ability of gay couples to adopt and have children together did get a bit overbearing. It could be because I wholeheartedly support the rights of gay parents to do so and wish they had all the benefits and legal guarantees that straight people do. If he was ...more
I used to think Dan Savage was an ass. I still think that.
However, I also think he does a lot of really good things. His advice is pretty good most of the time in his column, etc., and this book was well written. I really liked him as an author. This was the first book by him that I have read and it was informative, touching, and funny. He definitely is a talented author.
Granted, I found some of the thoughts he spewed disturbing, but he is nothing if not honest. It takes...more
However, I also think he does a lot of really good things. His advice is pretty good most of the time in his column, etc., and this book was well written. I really liked him as an author. This was the first book by him that I have read and it was informative, touching, and funny. He definitely is a talented author.
Granted, I found some of the thoughts he spewed disturbing, but he is nothing if not honest. It takes...more
Jackie
rated it
I decided to read some Dan Savage after seeing him being absolutely hilarious on the Colbert Report a couple times. I wasn't disappointed.
This gets three and a half stars, actually. The half I'm giving to Dan Savage because of the hilarious and not-actually-too-mean things he says about Irish Catholics. He really gets the guilt and the familial dynamics and the boozing and the love/not-like-so-much relationship with God.
My only quibble: Not all non-Chicagoan Midwesterners are close-m...more
This gets three and a half stars, actually. The half I'm giving to Dan Savage because of the hilarious and not-actually-too-mean things he says about Irish Catholics. He really gets the guilt and the familial dynamics and the boozing and the love/not-like-so-much relationship with God.
My only quibble: Not all non-Chicagoan Midwesterners are close-m...more
A funny, humorous, memorable account of a homosexual couple who want to become parents. Together they explore different options such as co-parenting with a lesbian couple, a single lesbian woman and open adoption. The honesty with which they discuss their relationship, their decisions and their lives is unforgettable. Dan Savage is great with one-liners!!
I won't go into how they come to have a child for fear I might ruin the story for someone else, but it kind of irked me that they r...more
I won't go into how they come to have a child for fear I might ruin the story for someone else, but it kind of irked me that they r...more
This book came across as honest and endearing. It was refreshing to have someone write a book on the new American family. Dan tackles the misconceptions about gay men with wit and honesty. He talks about the political and social challenges of gay adoption, but also has a remarkable way of making his story universal to all walks of life; fears of failure as a parent, etc.
I also learned a ton from this book about adoptions. Walking through the process with Dan and Terry was wonde...more
I also learned a ton from this book about adoptions. Walking through the process with Dan and Terry was wonde...more
Ciara
rated it
Recommends it for:
adoptive parents, gay parents, unexpectedly pregnant people, adopted kids
Shelves:
autobio-memoir,
read-in-2007
i guess the title of this book is fairly self-explanatory: it's all about sex columnist dan savage & his boyfriend adopting a child together. they went through an agency which put them in contact with a young pregnant homeless gutter punk who was in a family way. the agency got her an aptment to live in during the pregnancy & made sure she got good nutrition & medical care & everything. dan & his boyfriend were able to meet with her & get to know her story while she was pregnant, & they took cus...more
I read this in one day....so it was quick and fairly entertaining. I have seen Dan Savage on Larry King, so I was a little curious. I have to admit that part of made it a good book was that it takes place in Seattle and Portland. I was very familiar with all of the Portland locations....Lloyd Center, The Mallory Hotel, Rocco's Pizza etc. So that was fun. This book is about adoption, something I don't know much about....that was interesting. I liked his descriptions of his and his boyfriend'...more
I really enjoyed this book. I picked up at work on Saturday and finished it Sunday afternoon. Dan Savage, though a touch sloppy sometimes with his prose, is very readable and entertaining and I enjoyed his account of the open adoption experience. As he does in his advice column, Savage does not hold back on his fears, insecurities and concerns as a gay man embroiled in the very invasive, emotionally taxing process of adoption. I found it refreshing to read such an honest book about the perils an...more
Best of his books....I laughed, giggled....and tears fell from my eyes. All for touching reasons. You know what will happen going in, but it is fascinating to hear Dan explain all the details.
Dan and his boyfriend, Terry---go through an open adoption and you are a part of it. From announcing to his family---included his estranged grandmother, avoiding getting baby presents, meeting the gutter punk birth mother.....and taking the baby home.
This was my favorite book that Dan ...more
Dan and his boyfriend, Terry---go through an open adoption and you are a part of it. From announcing to his family---included his estranged grandmother, avoiding getting baby presents, meeting the gutter punk birth mother.....and taking the baby home.
This was my favorite book that Dan ...more
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Daniel Keenan Savage (born October 7, 1964 near Chicago, Illinois, United States) is an openly gay American sex advice columnist, author, media pundit, journalist, and newspaper editor. His strong opinions pointedly clash with both traditional conservative moral values and those put forth by what Savage has been known to call the "gay establishment." Savage has also worked as a theater d...more
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“For me, my discomfort with gay weddings was articulated by a close friend, who observed that gay people getting married is like retarded people getting together to give each other PhDs. It doesn't make them smarter, and it doesn't make us married.”
—
4 people liked it
“Terry gets annoyed when I describe his mother as cold. She isn't cold, he insists, just a little standoffish, and not so gabby as certain members of my family. While Terry's mom doesn't believe in asking intrusive questions, like "How are you?", she's still a warm and loving mom; just quiet and undemonstrative.”
—
3 people liked it
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