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Promises, Promises

3.78 of 5 stars 3.78  ·  rating details  ·  73 ratings  ·  10 reviews
Promises, Promises: A Romp with Plenty of Dykes, a Unicorn, an Ogre, an Oracle, a Quest, a Princess, and True Love with a Happily Ever After

Sandy Blunt, witch, has big dreams but C-average magic skills. Her only noteworthy talent is for paying extravagant compliments to women. Trouble is, when she uses that gift, she unwittingly foretells the future for a pretty princess.
Paperback, 234 pages
Published March 31st 2011 by Lethe Press
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Community Reviews

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Promises, Promises: A Romp with Plenty of Dykes, a Unicorn, an Ogre, an Oracle, a Quest, a Princess, and True Love with a Happily Ever After is just fun. Sandy Blunt makes improbable promises to a princess, and telling the fortunes of princesses is illegal, so she has a year and a day to make them all come true or be she and her friends will be beheaded.

As a parody of fantasy/adventure quest stories, the characters subvert common fantasy tropes. Sandy is a wizard, b
Elaine Burnes
First a disclaimer: I happen to be a moderator on the forum run by L-J Baker,, so my objectivity could well be questioned.

Anyway, the subtitle pretty much says it, and you can probably guess this book is not meant to be taken seriously. I am not well versed in fantasy (Chainmail bikinis? Apparently.) and science fiction. Those who are, will likely get even more enjoyment out of this than I did. I think of this as a lesbian mashup of Monty Python (think Holy Grail) and Harry Po
Wrote a blurb for this a few weeks back - rollicking and hilarious send-up of fantasy genre conventions.
I started reading this a while back and it was so smarmy, cutesy humorous that I stopped at page 5. It was really annoying. I ran out of things to read on my Kindle so I started it again and this time I did finish it. Either I was in a better mood this time or it's better if you can make it past page 5. It's kind of like Princess Bride meets Lord of the Rings, only the hobbits are lesbian feminists. It's fine if you're looking for a silly beach read but it was a little too self-aware at times.
Nathan Johnson
There are very few good books that have gay or transgender characters.
This book does nothing to increase that number.

It felt like the author of The Babysitter's club decided to write Conan fanfiction where all the protagonists are transformed into women.

I can't even like this as a parody of the heaving bosom fantasy genre. The writing is terrible.
The author needs to focus more on WHO the characters are, and not WHAT they are.
This was a really great lesbian romantic adventure comedy story. The story is pretty much a fairy tale, but with great comedy in it. This gave a good laugh unlike any other book that I have read so far. The romance is not much to talk about, but it's still fun to read. The adventure was fun to follow with all the things that happen in a fantasy story. This story was simply great and I really recommend it for people who like comedy like this one.
This book has many references to popular culture.
Stars Wars
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
The Narnia Chronicles
The Lord of the Rings
The Princess Bride
Snow White
Wizard of Oz
Three Little Pigs
Hansel and Gretel
Chronicles of Thomas Covenant
The Walrus and the Carpenter
Fran Bambust
Hilarisch, fantasierijk, sexy en feministisch. Wat verwacht een mens nog meer van een fantasy-roman over een groepje lesbische heldinnen op een onmogelijke queeste. Een goede poging tot Pratchett door een niet-Pratchett. En heerlijk lesbisch :D
Utterly silly! But fun and satisfying :) I was much amused at the little in joke allusions XD
Jan 21, 2013 Calysta marked it as to-read
Just bought it, I've only just started reading it, but so far so good!
Khadijah Thompson
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L-J Baker lives in New Zealand with her civilly united spouse, more cats than is sensible, and various other critters. She spent a long time at school pursuing studies that had nothing to do with writing. She is the site admin for the online Lesbian Fiction Forum. And, yes, L-J really is her whole name.
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