Goodreads helps you keep track of books you want to read.
Start by marking “Love Is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships” as Want to Read:
Love Is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships
Enlarge cover
Rate this book
Clear rating
Open Preview

Love Is a Story: A New Theory of Relationships

3.75  ·  Rating Details ·  91 Ratings  ·  10 Reviews
In this groundbreaking work, Robert Sternberg opens the book of love and shows you how to discover your own story--and how to read your relationships in a whole new light.
What draws us so strongly to some people and repels us from others? What makes some relationships work so smoothly and others burst into flames? Sternberg gives us new answers to these questions by showi
Paperback, 256 pages
Published June 3rd 1999 by Oxford University Press, USA (first published February 12th 1998)
More Details... edit details

Friend Reviews

To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up.

Reader Q&A

To ask other readers questions about Love Is a Story, please sign up.

Be the first to ask a question about Love Is a Story

This book is not yet featured on Listopia. Add this book to your favorite list »

Community Reviews

(showing 1-30)
filter  |  sort: default (?)  |  Rating Details
Aug 30, 2011 Liam rated it liked it
“We fall in love with a person, but perhaps it is even more accurate to say that we fall in love with a story about a person.” (34)
Jun 11, 2011 Xaka rated it it was amazing
This book is a must-have for folks who have been dissatisfied by the partners they've chosen in their previous relationships. The theory breaks down various types of stories people are trying to create or believe in creating when it comes to their relationships and talks about the advantages and disadvantages of all of them. For instance, people who believe in war stories might have fulfilling argumentative relationships that last forever even though outsiders can't understand what is keeping th ...more
Jul 24, 2016 Sven rated it it was amazing
Robert Sternberg describes relationships through the lens of storytelling. Depending on the stories we unconciously chose for ourselves, we play out different roles in our relationships.

There's an infinite amount of possible stories, but he presents some of the more common he found in his studies (25). Interestingly they correspond for the most part with the stories we like to experience in movies, books and other media.

For example, there's the mystery story, the war story, even the horror story
May 09, 2009 Izlinda rated it it was amazing
Recommended to Izlinda by: Bridgett Mahoney
Shelves: psychology
Written in a flowing style, this book is entertaining and also educational. It may be a bit shallow, giving 20-plus "stories" people hold about love without going more in-depth into the advantages and disadvantages of each "story" but it is a good introduction. I'm sure there are plenty of other books (psychological or self-help) where the specific "stories" explored in depth, even if, for example, they are not called "horror" or "police" stories per se.
Feb 10, 2009 Nubia rated it liked it
A very novel idea, a theory that I believe is very real and a smooth way of teling it. Very good book, though the last 1/3 was kind of boring to me since I was able to predict the descriptions of cases that were ilustrating each story. That much I integrated his analysis!
Jul 23, 2016 Cici rated it did not like it
I picked up this book out of curiosity since it is mentioned in the "animal spirit" by Akerlof and Shiller. What a dirge! A complete waste of time to go through these baby-talking narratives of "love stories".
Debby Chang
Oct 01, 2014 Debby Chang rated it liked it
Very entertaining but not necessarily convincing as a methodology for relationship diagnosis. Also played uncomfortably into my natural inclinations to treat life like a Hollywood popcorn movie
Sally Raskoff
Apr 16, 2015 Sally Raskoff rated it liked it
I got this for a class I'm teaching - I teach Sternberg's Triangular Theory and wanted to see what he's up to..
Jaz rated it really liked it
Apr 15, 2011
John rated it really liked it
Jan 17, 2015
Bita rated it it was ok
May 28, 2010
Ana rated it did not like it
Jun 03, 2011
Fari rated it it was ok
May 11, 2012
Ели rated it really liked it
May 21, 2013
Kaye Gallego
Kaye Gallego rated it really liked it
Aug 17, 2015
Jane Venus-Dugaduga
Jane Venus-Dugaduga rated it really liked it
Aug 10, 2016
Debbie Flint
Debbie Flint rated it it was amazing
Jul 10, 2014
Jepa rated it really liked it
Nov 17, 2014
Janet rated it it was ok
Mar 16, 2011
Roberto Ingles
Roberto Ingles rated it liked it
Dec 02, 2014
Jenn rated it really liked it
Dec 19, 2009
Ali rated it it was amazing
Jun 18, 2011
Amy rated it really liked it
May 11, 2013
Shelley rated it liked it
Feb 06, 2016
Ben rated it it was ok
Jan 25, 2015
Matin MB
Matin MB rated it really liked it
Oct 14, 2016
Robyn rated it liked it
Jun 25, 2012
Josh rated it it was amazing
Oct 15, 2008
Erudite Investor
Erudite Investor rated it really liked it
Sep 28, 2013
Kevin R
Kevin R rated it really liked it
Jan 10, 2013
« previous 1 3 4 next »
There are no discussion topics on this book yet. Be the first to start one »
  • Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others: The Fascinating Research That Can Land You the Husband of Your Dreams
  • All About Love: Anatomy of an Unruly Emotion
  • The Erotic Phenomenon
  • Love: A History
  • Psyche and Symbol: A Selection from the Writings of C.G. Jung
  • To Love as God Loves
  • Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation
  • Show Me God: What the Message from Space is Telling Us about God
  • Models of God
  • Falling in Love: Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose
  • To Love and Be Loved
  • Happiness: Unlocking the Mysteries of Psychological Wealth
  • The Dance of Anger / The Dance of Intimacy / The Dance of Deception
  • Existential Psychology
  • Art and Feminism
  • Lying in Weight: The Hidden Epidemic of Eating Disorders in Adult Women
  • Love and Living
  • The Faith of the Faithless: Experiments in Political Theology
Robert J. Sternberg's spectacular research career in psychology had a rather inauspicious beginning. In elementary school he performed poorly on IQ tests, and his teachers' actions conveyed their low expectations for his future progress. Everything changed when his fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Alexa, saw that he had potential and challenged him to do better. With her encouragement, he became a high- ...more
More about Robert J. Sternberg...

Share This Book