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Paradise Rules

3.71  ·  Rating Details ·  55 Ratings  ·  15 Reviews


It’s only a week into summer break and already seventeen-year-old Gates has . . .

a) Hustled millionaires on the golf course

b) Tried to stop his mother from having a(nother) nervous breakdown

c) Promised to lose his virginity with his girlfriend, Mel . . . which would be great if he hadn’t already lost it to his forty-year-old godmother

d) Almost kil

Paperback, 304 pages
Published July 12th 2011 by Gallery Books
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Julie Smith (Knitting and Sundries)
This review first appeared on my blog:

First Sentence: I wish I could say I was a victim but I willingly played into the devil's hands.

Gates is a self-described sexual deviant, 17 years old, working as a caddy at a country club. His mother had a nervous breakdown two years ago, and he was molested by his godmother Alicia, a child psychologist and his mom's best friend. Since they still live with Alicia, the molestation continues, and it's causing Gates pro
Cassie (Happy Book Lovers)
Jun 08, 2013 Cassie (Happy Book Lovers) rated it really liked it
Go to my summer giveaway contest!

This was so vastly different from most young adult books that I read — you can just tell from the synopsis. I mean, the book starts with Gates's godmother walking around his house naked just so she can have sex with him. He's a sympathetic kid, and it's clear that he means well, but he can't help himself and falls prey to her multiple times through the novel. And if that wasn't bad enough, his mother should clearly not have
Jul 18, 2012 Lizzy rated it really liked it
Gates has one crazy chaotic life. He's got a mother who hasn't been present in his life since her "breakdown", and a godmother who is all sorts of vile. His girlfriend is worried that he doesn't find her beautiful, and the majority of his income comes from ripping people off during golf games. If that doesn't intrigue you I'm not sure what will.

I'm fairly certain that in Alicia I found my most hated character of 2011. Even as I'm writing this review I'm still thinking about how horrible she is!
Jul 11, 2011 Kristen rated it really liked it
Shelves: galley-grab
Originally Posted on Strawberry Splash Book Reviews

Gates, a seventeen year old from Colorado, has gone through a lot this summer. He has a deal with the owner of the golf club he is a caddy at: win lots a money off of millionaires in golf and he can play on the course. He also has been having sex with his 40 year old godmother even though he said he was going to lose his virginity to his girlfriend Mel. He loves his girlfriend and only his girlfriend but he can't sleep with her while hiding all
Jul 12, 2011 Jules rated it liked it
I rated this book a 3.5 on my blog:

This was a fun book to read with quite a few laughs and definitely some groans thrown in. Gates isn't a bad kid by any means, he just doesn't always think with his brain. (Of course that describes how many 17 year old males?)

The characters that populate this book are very well written. Many of them come across as people that we might have in our own lives. Gates is a very sympathetic kid as he really does have a great heart. He
Feb 23, 2012 Katie rated it liked it
Paradise rules” wasn’t like any other book I’ve ever read. First of, it has a male protagonist, who describes the events very well. Secondly, there’s a lot of golf involved. As a non golf player I found it very difficult sometimes what they were talking about in the book, but it was nice anyways. I really liked the different characters in the book as well: first Gates’ mom, who is really special and unpredictable, then his godmother, who’s sleeping with him (and there are many details about what ...more
Sep 09, 2011 Jen rated it it was amazing
Shelves: read-in-2011, library
UGH!!! I don't even know where to start with this review. I will say that the quotes from others about the book are pretty accurate: "Hilarious, disturbing and stylish" "Ballsy and bold" "Alternately sweet and dark...there is humor woven into every beautiful page"

I was laughing out loud as I started the book - only 5 pages in, which is always a good sign. I LOVE a good narrator and Gates is AWESOME! You can't help but LOOVE this kid, but his life is SO F'd UP that it actually made me cry. In my
Mary (BookHounds)
Jul 24, 2011 Mary (BookHounds) rated it really liked it
Gates loves his girlfriend Mel, he earns extra money by hustling golf players at a country club as a caddy, his mother is just about to have a breakdown and he stumbles on something that may just change his "normal" life. Mel knows something is wrong but just can't put her finger on it and when Gates finally decides to open up, he has what can only be described as an "epic fail". Just when he thinks he can no longer deal, he finds a strength that was there all along.

This book has everything to m
Haley Keller
Sep 22, 2014 Haley Keller rated it liked it
I won this book in a giveaway several years ago, and I had no idea what it was about until I started reading (or maybe I did and had just forgotten). I wasn't expecting the book to deal with such a heavy and serious topic as statutory rape.

I really just thought this book was okay. My biggest reason for that is just that I couldn't get into the story at all. The story made me uncomfortable, and that could have been a good thing considering the subject matter. However, I think a lot of those feeli
Jul 15, 2011 Dorothy rated it really liked it
When I read the first few pages I thought oh crap a book for teenagers.
But I was so wrong. Yeah a teenager would love this book. But so would a fifty year old woman.
The characters are well developed and interesting no one is boring is this book.
But lots of people are just so wrong.
Gates has a major crises in is life and no one to help him.
I am sure lots of us have felt that way at one time or another.
Gates has lots of people in his life and no one to understand his problem. He attempts a few tim
Jul 17, 2013 Paul rated it it was amazing
Shelves: humor, dark, boulder, aspen
If you want a dark funny book, this one delivers! An entertaining look at growing up in a dysfunctional situation, interspersed with the kind of people who do what they want and seek pleasure anyway they can get it, no matter how much wreckage they leave behind. The main Character Gates who just finished his junior year in high school, just can't seem to find "normal people" His mom is a crazy bisexual, his god mother started having an affair with him when he was 15, He is a scratch golfer who s ...more
Sep 10, 2016 Rekara rated it really liked it
I really liked this book. I read it quickly and it was witty and I was never sure of what to expect. Gates has interesting experiences, some of them I wish that I could have. Some I wish would never happen to anyone.

The book is not heavy with context and background. It's vivid; giving you only what you need to move forward, which is refreshing compared to the dense things I've read lately.
Andrea Larson
Nov 23, 2011 Andrea Larson rated it it was ok
If I could give this book two and a half stars, I would. Frankly, I'm not sure what I think about it, because it's about a seriously dysfunctional teenager, coping with a seriously dysfunctional family life. It's meant to be funny, and parts of it are, but it's so sad too. Luckily, it's fiction, so I don't have to feel badly for Gates, the main character.

Amy rated it really liked it
Oct 14, 2011
Carrie rated it it was amazing
Nov 25, 2012
Laurie Gold
Laurie Gold rated it liked it
Jul 03, 2011
Tyler Mayer
Aug 12, 2011 Tyler Mayer rated it it was amazing
Loved this book.
Lindsey rated it it was amazing
Jul 20, 2015
Briana rated it really liked it
Aug 26, 2015
Lindsay rated it really liked it
Dec 18, 2011
Guy Casavan
Guy Casavan rated it really liked it
Aug 23, 2012
Kelli rated it really liked it
Jul 29, 2014
Duyen rated it it was ok
Jul 24, 2011
Jim rated it it was amazing
Jul 06, 2014
Cynthia rated it really liked it
Mar 30, 2014
Wendy rated it it was amazing
Jun 19, 2011
Danielle Mitchell
Dec 12, 2013 Danielle Mitchell rated it it was amazing
Very good book.
Jory rated it it was ok
Jul 26, 2014
Chloe Bieber
Chloe Bieber rated it it was amazing
Dec 08, 2014
Laurie rated it it was amazing
Aug 21, 2013
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