Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles by Kim Newman

Jun 07, 2012 Walt O'Hara rated it 4 of 5 stars

Initial response: So far, pretty darned funny. Like a Holmes and Watson through the looking glass, with a sprinkling of Flashman for fun!

Final Review:

Professor Moriarity: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles is a collection of short stories by Kim Newman, the author of the Anno Dracula novels. The collection features a series of tales recounting the memoirs of Colonel Sebastian Moran, being written or dictated in some remote spot, long after retiring. The seven stories and introductory material recou...more Initial response: So far, pretty darned funny. Like a Holmes and Watson through the looking glass, with a sprinkling of Flashman for fun!

Final Review:

Professor Moriarity: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles is a collection of short stories by Kim Newman, the author of the Anno Dracula novels. The collection features a series of tales recounting the memoirs of Colonel Sebastian Moran, being written or dictated in some remote spot, long after retiring. The seven stories and introductory material recount a ten year period in the criminal career of Colonel Moran, with a large part of the narrative focusing on the exploits and actions of James Moriarity, the villain of the Sherlock Holmes stories.

Every tale is a pastiche (or homage through a dark mirror) to a particular Holmes story or some other famous Victorian fictional reference-- "A Shambles in Belgravia" for "A Scandal in Bohemia", the titular "Hound of the D'Urbervilles" as a stand in for "the Hound of the Baskervilles", etc. In this reverse mirror of the Holmes stories, it is Moran who acts as Boswell to his mentor, Moriarity, exactly as Watson does for Holmes.

If you've ever read any of the novels set in Kim Newman's Anno Dracula universe, you already know that he can weave a tale laden with references that will have you scurrying for Jess Nevin's The Encyclopedia of Fantastic Victoriana. He is more than a one trick pony here; we are given the references in an offhand manner, it's up to us to be in the know about what Colonel Moran is narrating. For a reader like me, it's just ducky discovering Victorian references I have had no notion of (as in the Vivisectionist Doctor Jack Quartz, Professor Moriarity's American rival) or Madame Sara, "The Sorceress of the Strand". I never tire of such references; this is why I read and enjoy Kim Newman's books. Interestingly, Sherlock Holmes himself is hardly mentioned in these stories, he doesn't make an appearance until the last one.

On top of all the fun name dropping is a meta-level where the reader gets a distinct sense of Moran coming to grips with his own mortality.. an encroaching feeling that he is becoming a heroic dinosaur in the face of the Modern Age. As A.C. Doyle does not portray Moran as anything but a one-dimensional villain, I preferred this version.

Professor Moriarity is a very fast read, I had it done in about a day and a half, and I found it thoroughly enjoyable. Highly Recommended.(less)

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Aug 19, 2012 Daniel Cann rated it 4 of 5 stars

This new and completely original Holmes Universe novel, from acclaimed author Kim Newman, shows once again his flair and talent for mixing characters from fiction and placing them together in thrilling and unexpected adventures together.

After reading this, I could not believe that there have not been other Moriarty and Moran adventures. John Gardner, perhaps more famous for writing the James Bond continuation novels in the 1980s and 90s, wrote three Moriarty novels, but no one has actually writt...more This new and completely original Holmes Universe novel, from acclaimed author Kim Newman, shows once again his flair and talent for mixing characters from fiction and placing them together in thrilling and unexpected adventures together.

After reading this, I could not believe that there have not been other Moriarty and Moran adventures. John Gardner, perhaps more famous for writing the James Bond continuation novels in the 1980s and 90s, wrote three Moriarty novels, but no one has actually written a Watson styled narrative from the criminal duo’s perspective. This is simply a comic and creative first.

Moriarty and Moran are cast as the evil alter-ego’s of Holmes and Watson; they even have a housekeeper in Mrs Halifax, instead of dear old Mrs Hudson, with one major difference: their lodgings in Conduit Street is in fact a brothel with Mrs Halifax, their landlady, as Madam.

Newman has ingeniously written seven short stories in much the same style as Sir Arthur Conan Doyle did (with Watson as Holmes’ chronicler and biographer); this time Moran is the author. So rather than the customary moral indignation and sense of fair play from the pen of the good doctor, we have the politically incorrect and self-centred musings of the criminal that is Moran.

Newman has managed to expertly subvert and twist the Holmes canon to suit this dastardly pair, so, instead of “The Hound of the Baskervilles”, we have “The Hound of the D’Urbervilles”, in the place of “A Scandal In Bohemia”, we have “A Shambles In Belgravia”, and rather than “The Red-Headed League”, we have instead “The Red Planet League”, making for ingenious and riotous fun.

Clearly, as he has demonstrated with his “Anno Dracula” series, Newman has an encyclopaedic knowledge of Victorian fiction, and here he turns his sights on all things Holmesian, with a twist.

These are the criminal activities and exploits as told by a first class cad, card cheat, game hunter and braggart. The personalities, mannerisms and quirks of both Moriarty and Moran are expertly brought to life.

This collection of short stories is packed with incident and action. There is violence, gothic horror, the occult, mystery, suspense and plenty of belly laughs.

Holmes enthusiasts will have plenty to chew on; even non-initiates will be thoroughly amused and entertained, with the characters from different universes brought together for these unlikely tales.

Newman has once again produced a fantastically entertaining and fulfilling re-imagining of popular fictional characters, putting them into adventures of his own imagining, whilst succeeding in being both reverential as well as mischievous.
(less)

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Jul 08, 2012 James Taintor rated it 5 of 5 stars

I'd put off reading this one for a while, faced with the obvious fact that no book could ever live up to a title like Hound of the D'Urbervilles, but of course I am now filled with chagrin for underestimating Newman's literary skill. The underlying concept (what if Professor Moriarty had had his own Watson, a rough second back from the wars and given sometimes to scribbling accounts of his boss's similar and often-in-fact-analogous clever exploits) never descends into any rote formula. Newman's...more I'd put off reading this one for a while, faced with the obvious fact that no book could ever live up to a title like Hound of the D'Urbervilles, but of course I am now filled with chagrin for underestimating Newman's literary skill. The underlying concept (what if Professor Moriarty had had his own Watson, a rough second back from the wars and given sometimes to scribbling accounts of his boss's similar and often-in-fact-analogous clever exploits) never descends into any rote formula. Newman's careful to make each story stand completely on its own, never content to rest on its parody, inversion, or subversion of the original ~~Conan Doyle, Sir Arthur~~ Dr. John Watson text.

Here's some exemplia gratia for you, by the way, carefully chosen to avoid spoilage:

1. parody: "Only an idiot guesses or reasons or deduces," the Professor said, patiently.

   OR

In a battle which might interest scholars of modern urban warfare, the Conduit Street Comanche whipped the tar out of an irregular band of crybaby destitutes who pledged allegience to the Watson's departed mucker-wallah.

2. inversion: To Professor Moriarty, she is always that bitch.

   OR

well, the entire personality of Colonel Sebastian Moran.

3. subversion: "Dullards would have you believe that once you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth... but to a mathematical mind, the impossible is simply a theorem to be solved. We must not eliminate the impossible, we must conquer it, suborn it to our purpose. Whatever remains, however dully probable, will satisfy earthbound thinkers, while we have the profit of the hitherto inconceivable."

   OR

the Truth of What Happened at Reichenbach Fall, and just exactly What It Signified.

But my point is, even if you'd never read the originals and didn't chuckle at each new twist, almost every story in this book stands well on its own, while several (especially "The Adventure of the Six Maledictions" and "The Greek Invertebrate," despite the clearly telegraphed conclusion of the former) defy any categorization shy of "ripping yarn." Colonel Moran, sadistic thrillseeker and thorough degenerate, remains a charming narrator throughout, demonstrating enough development as a personality to avoid easy dismissal as Watson-through-a-glass-darkly but nonetheless deliciously roguish to the last page. Moriarty himself is developed splendidly, and comes closer to effecting a three-dimensional Bond villain than anything Fleming or his imitators have attempted-- just wait for the story that explores his family background. And the cases themselves, though frequently constructed around a formulaic combination of a ~~Doyle~~ Watson original and another contemporary literary or historical allusion, are well-executed to a one. Hell, there's even some contemporary social relevance, as in Moran's disparagement of the Pinkerton Agency: if you operate in a country where captains of industry and hogs of politics make murder legal as long as it's a union organizer being murdered, what's the point, eh?

A+, would lose a few long summer afternoons to again.(less)

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Apr 15, 2012 Vaughn Entwistle rated it 5 of 5 stars

More than just a spoof of Sherlock Holmes stories. in in this inverted tale told from the criminal point of view, Professor Moriarty is the hero with the "thin man" Sherlock Holmes more nuisance than Nemesis of the Napoleon of crime. Colonel Moran, the crackshot criminal who brought back Sherlock Holmes from the presumed dead in the in "The Adventure of the Empty House" plays a meaner, deadlier Watson to Moriart's "consulting criminal." Author Kim Newton's novel is a hilarious mash up of victori...more

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Nov 12, 2011 Elizabeth rated it 5 of 5 stars

If you love Holmes, you really must get Newman's latest. Colonel "Tiger" Moran, aka "Basher" Moran to the ladies, tells his side of the Moriarty story. As always, Newman is extremely erudite (the footnotes alone are worth the price of the book) and, compared to Professor Moriarty' evil ways, Moran is patriot and a saint. Hound of the D'urbervilles bears more than a passing relationship to the Flashman novels (in at least one of which, Flashman and the Tiger, Moran makes an appearance). So be war...more

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Jul 07, 2012 Natalie rated it 5 of 5 stars

There are books that you just EXPECT to love. For me this is one of those. The narrative itself mirrors the basic line of the infamous Watson/Holmes stories.. but with a intriguingly different slant. Instead of the familiar John Watson - a wounded soldier presenting us with stories of his adventures with Sherlock Holmes - we have Colonel Sebastian 'Basher' Moran - a wounded soldier presenting us with stories of his adventures with Professor James Moriarty. And, honestly, it's an angle I just cou...more

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Feb 19, 2012 Claude rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: sherlock-holmes

The Hound of the D'Urbervilles is a thoroughly enjoyable book which delivers precisely what it promises: a crude, close-up look at the most dangerous man in London.

Our narrator is Moran, a twisted parallel of Watson. He is gloating instead of humble, lewd instead of graceful. For all his unpleasant habits, he makes surprisingly likeable character. He does have a tendency to dominate the narrative, frequently relegating even the estimable Moriarty to the background, but he is so dynamic that thi...more

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May 08, 2013 Troy Rodgers rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: mystery, historical-fiction

Nobody spins Victorian literature on its ear quite like Kim Newman. I'm already a shameless fan of his Anno-Dracula series, and I have yet to read anything else of his that I thought was less than sub-par. This book fits right in with his proven track record.

This particular story is actually a handful of stories, all written from the memoirs of Moriarty's right-hand thug, Col. Sebastian Moran. What's inside? Depravity, cunning, top-notch characterization, and humor.

Not only do we get to see insi...more

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Jan 19, 2012 Lady Entropy rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

Acabei de ler o "Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'ubbervilles" de Kim Newman.

E tenho que afirmar que a minha adoração pelo cavalheiro em nada diminuiu, ainda que este livro não fosse fantasia urbana. Desta feita, leva-nos ao mundo do Sherlock Holmes, visto por um espelho reverso - aqui são contadas as aventuras do némesis do Holmes, o Professor Moriarty - pela pena do seu segundo, Sebastian "Basher" Moran, um reflexo negro do fiel Watson.

Imitando os mais famosos livros do Detective, são 7...more

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Jun 18, 2012 Christopher Everest rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: crime

This is one of those amusing (but not laugh out loud) recounted stories - ie. Somebody finds a manuscript that tells a previously untold story. It does for the Sherlock Holmes-James Moriarty afficionado what Flashman did for the same period. It works and is beautifully written. It shapes itself from being an apologetic collection of short stories to work up to the famous scene at the Reichenbach falls. The use of footnotes is slightly irritating but does fit in to the construct of an editorial p...more

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Dec 16, 2011 Bradley rated it 4 of 5 stars

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. Brilliant.

This is an imaginatively conceived book that examines the most famous nemesis of all the Victorian murder mysteries. Interestingly, I don't recall the book actually naming Sherlock Holmes in its pages...perhaps a copyright issue...but like many of the characters presented in this collection of individual adventures, he is referred to primarily by the derogatory nickname that Moriarty and his cronies give him.

I would have given this book a fifth star but for two reasons; the first of wh...more

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Jan 10, 2013 Mick rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: general-fiction

Mathematics professor and master criminal James Moriarty is so instrinsically a part of the Holmes canon in the popular imagination that it's sometimes easy to forget he only ever featured in two of Conan Doyle's original stories. In "Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles" (the title alone made me laugh out loud) Kim Newman (Anno Dracula) explores the rise and fall of the "Napoleon of crime" through the eyes of his very own Watson figure, the violent and sadistic marksman Colonel Se...more

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Oct 11, 2011 Wolf rated it 5 of 5 stars

You don't need to be a fan of Sherlock Holmes to know of Professor Moriaty, the original arch-villain, the Napoleon of Crime. Of course, he has always had to play second fiddle to the Great Detective. `Professor Moriaty: The Hound of the d'Urbervilles' sets out to give us his story - Moriaty's adventures beyond the Reichenbach Falls. Newman gives us a witty, entertaining and thoroughly enjoyable inversion of the Holmes cannon.

Although a novel, the book appears to be collection of short stories,...more You don't need to be a fan of Sherlock Holmes to know of Professor Moriaty, the original arch-villain, the Napoleon of Crime. Of course, he has always had to play second fiddle to the Great Detective. `Professor Moriaty: The Hound of the d'Urbervilles' sets out to give us his story - Moriaty's adventures beyond the Reichenbach Falls. Newman gives us a witty, entertaining and thoroughly enjoyable inversion of the Holmes cannon.

Although a novel, the book appears to be collection of short stories, aping the form of the Holmes collections. The stories twist the Holmesian originals. Moriaty breeds wasps not bees. Colonel Sebastian Moran (Moriaty's former right hand man in `The Return of Sherlock Holmes') is our Watson, narrating the stories. The titles mimic Doyle's originals: from `A Volume in Vermillion' through to `The Problem of the Final Adventure'. Their plots similarly either are inspired by, intertwine with or springboard off the original stories. There is a joy in recognising the allusions to Watson's accounts of events (though there are footnotes to help out when your memory fails) or characters from them. Irene Adler turns up, for example, to frustrate Holmes's dark mirror too (`To Moriaty she was always that bitch.')

Whilst an amusing conceit in itself, this could easily become somewhat one note and tiring over the course of more than 450 pages. What gives it life is the way that Newman interweaves these elements from Doyle with other creations and the language used to express it.

Newman plunders freely from other literature of the end of the nineteenth century. Hardy's Wessex provides us with the d'Urberville family of the title story (and also other Wessex characters such as the reddleman from `Return of the Native'). Various members of the cast from `The Prisoner of Zenda' show up, as do Fu Manchu (under an alias), Raffles, the Maltese Falcon and some more obscure fictional objects and people. One doesn't need to get every reference to enjoy the feeling of recognition as these elements are woven into the narrative.

Perhaps the greatest achievement here though is Colonel Sebastian `Basher' Moran himself. It is after all his voice that gives life to the characters and the story. And what a charming rogue he is - a cross between George MacDonald Fraser's Flashman and Mark Gatiss's Lucifer Box. Amusing and smart, he seems utterly unimpressed by the intellectual aspects of the adventures and contests. Like Bertie Wooster, he makes his Jeeves look all the brighter by having an entirely different outlook and set of interests. He also has a fine line in witty metaphor and simile. A thug reunited with a much used cosh `hug[s] the cane like a long-missing gold coin.'

This may not be deepest book I've read this year, it might not engage the truth of the human condition as much as some, but it has been one of the most pleasurable to read. Any fan of Holmes stories or of Flashman-esque capers might want to check this out. (less)

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Feb 21, 2012 Bracari.iris is currently reading it

Shelves: crime

"And I relaxed. I knew. My destiny and his wound together. It was a sensation I’d never got before upon meeting a man. When I’d had it from women, the upshot ranged from disappointment to attempted murder.
Understand me, Professor James Moriarty was a hateful man, the most hateful, hateable, creature I have ever known, not excluding Sir Augustus and Kali’s Kitten and the Abominable Bloody Snow-Bastard and the
Reverend Henry James Prince [1]. He was something man-shaped that had crawled out from un...more

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Oct 18, 2011 Riju Ganguly rated it 5 of 5 stars

Wise men (and women) have considered literature as mirror of society. That presupposition inevitably leads to several pesky questions, one among of them being: "who is getting reflected into whom"? If the Victorian world seen through the eyes of that faithful Army Pensioner and highly respectable Dr. Watson of 221B Baker Street and presented as "The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes" is the 'real' thing, then the 'virtual' must be this book: the view from Conduit Street, as depicted by Colonel Sebas...more Wise men (and women) have considered literature as mirror of society. That presupposition inevitably leads to several pesky questions, one among of them being: "who is getting reflected into whom"? If the Victorian world seen through the eyes of that faithful Army Pensioner and highly respectable Dr. Watson of 221B Baker Street and presented as "The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes" is the 'real' thing, then the 'virtual' must be this book: the view from Conduit Street, as depicted by Colonel Sebastian 'Basher' Moran. In every imaginable (and unimaginable) manner, Kim Newman creates this unique 'inverted' world that is known (with tantalising glimpses of the 'real' world and comfortably known things mentioned in the said "Adventures" and numerous other exploits of heroes and anti-heroesand) yet unknown and horrifying, repelling and fascinating, 'fun' and sombre. But let me mention the "bad-ventures" included in this book, and check if the titles rattle a few tumblers in the safe of your mind:

(*) Preface: the incidents that allow the unearthing of the manuscript, after the collapse of the "Box Brothers" where it had been kept.

1) Chapter One: A Volume in Vermilion: induction of Moran in Moriarty's orbit, and the prequel to "A Study in Scarlet".
2) Chapter Two: A Shambles In Belgravia: Irene Adler had not rubbed only ONE mastermind the wrong way, as you would know after reading this piece.
3) Chapter Three: The Red Planet League: Moriarty getting one over his arch-nemesis (no, NOT Holmes).
4) Chapter Four: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles: the most gothic & chilling story in this collection.
5) Chapter Five: The Adventure of the Six Maledictions: an one-line summary would be insulting for a story of this complexity, and yet so enjoyable. You better leave this story for a slow and relaxed reading, just to appreciate it over a long time.
6) Chapter Six: The Greek Invertebrate: a Moriarty family reunion, our first introduction to several enigmatic charatcers mentioned in other most memorable adventures (NO, I am NOT going to list them here, but this adventure also deserves your utmost attention), and our only look into Moriarty's childhood. And YES, THAT is utterly terrifying.
7) Chapter Seven: The Problem of the Final Adventure: a neat clearing-up of the mess created by "The Final Problem", "The Empty House" and the interpretations proposed by all & sundry, with an unexpected degree of seriousness, and the right amount of ambiguity at the last line, allowing us to draw our conclusion.

This book does not present Moriarty as a likeable fellow, going against Michael Kurland's conception. But it portrays a neglected and foot-noted character in brilliant & vivid shades: Colonel Moran himself. I can only pray that Da Man feels inspired enough to conjure a few more anecdotes from the pool of this narrator's memory, in whose presence all other narrators of Sherlockiana (& Moriartiana??) are bound to appear colourless. Highly recommended would be a huge understatement. Go, get the book!(less)

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Jul 22, 2012 Michael Logan rated it 4 of 5 stars

This was very smart and a lot of fun, although I felt the ending was rather rushed and the big showdown with Moriarty's nemesis (not Holmes) was glossed over, almost as though the author just wasn't sure how to resolve it.

Still, I loved the narrator, a bounder who murders, steals and connives but is so shameless about it you can't help but like him. The obvious comparison was with Flashman, and it was nice to see George MacDonald Fraser's classic character given a shout-out in the acknowledgeme...more

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Apr 28, 2012 Matt Lindsey rated it 5 of 5 stars

This is the second book I read by Kim Newman, and I've always been a Sherlock Holmes fan. But I've often wondered why Moriarty was considered Holmes' nemesis when he's really only in two of Doyle's stories? This book I feel answered that, for it Newman explained why Moriarty is truly the Napoleon of Crime. I enjoyed the spin on the classic Watson narration with the stories being told by Col. Moran, who was also fleshed out by this book. These stories go beyond Doyle's stories and into other clas...more

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May 07, 2013 Elena rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: babele-challenge, mystery, read-in-english, 2013

I'm usually quite faithful to the ACD canon and a little sceptic of the other Sherlock Holmes fictions. However, I've always had a weak spot both for James Moriarty and Sebastian Moran, and been disappointed that they weren't more featured in the original stories, so I really couldn't resist this book... and I can happily say I immensely enjoyed it!
The volume is a collection of short stories narrated by Moran about his and Moriarty's criminal adventures, in a very Sherlock Holmes style, and yet...more I'm usually quite faithful to the ACD canon and a little sceptic of the other Sherlock Holmes fictions. However, I've always had a weak spot both for James Moriarty and Sebastian Moran, and been disappointed that they weren't more featured in the original stories, so I really couldn't resist this book... and I can happily say I immensely enjoyed it!
The volume is a collection of short stories narrated by Moran about his and Moriarty's criminal adventures, in a very Sherlock Holmes style, and yet in a very different way: after all, instead of a brave consulting detective we have a ruthless consulting criminal, and instead of a good-hearted doctor we have a politically incorrect right-hand man.
The titles of the stories are a parody of the most famous Holmes adventures, which is of course endless fun for the Sherlockians, as it is for the subtle references to well known Holmes cases, and for the apparitions of other ACD characters, like the superb Irene Adler. Newman also plays with other Victorian fictional characters, as well as real crimes (I was so excited to see Constance Kent cited here; the Road Hill House murder, anyone?). The stories are all very clever, with a lot of twists and an endless black humour. It's really difficult to choose one favourite, but it's likely "The Hound of the D'Urbervilles" deserves that title just for Moriarty's exhilarating disguise.
Moran's voice is witty and highly entertaining, and Moriarty is cleverly drawn, being both truly creepy and slightly amusing, especially when are mentioned parallelisisms with Sherlock Holmes (Moriarty's preference for waps and contempt for bees, Moriarty's poor disguises, the woman/that bitch etc.). Even though both characters are portrayed in a totally satisfying way, you can't help but wanting more once you get to the end.
All things considered, I think this book is a gem for all the Sherlockians out there, but I highly recommend it to non-ACD fans too. Who knows, maybe after reading this book you'll feel the sudden need to go and read some Sherlock Holmes stories too...(less)

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May 04, 2012 Jamesdamadan rated it 5 of 5 stars

Just finished Kim Newman's Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles. Perfect ending. I'm torn between calling for more and unfortunately getting an answer to the final mystery. I can recommend this book to any Baker Street Irregular, fan of the Great Detective, connoisseur of Victorian and psuedo-Victorian fiction.

in longer books, it helps if I can like the narrator or one of the lead or supporting characters. While I can't say I liked Colonel Moran, or even admire him, I can say I enjoyed the h...more

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Dec 30, 2011 Nigel rated it 5 of 5 stars

This collection of fiendishly clever, delightfully witty and yet brilliantly human and insightful short stories build up to a coherent and satisfying novel. Moriarty and Moran, a twisted reflection of Holmes and Watson, criminal genius and murderous Boswell in partnership as consulting criminals. The Newman genius for literary gamesmanship is in full effect here. The layers of references and jokes and obscure characters belie a deft and confident writing style and a dazzling plotter. Moran is a...more

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Sep 08, 2012 Kristen rated it 1 of 5 stars

I thought this sounded quite interesting - an opportunity for a Sherlock Holmes fan to find out more about the nefarious Professor Moriarty. I had high hopes for the book, but found it very disappointing.

First off the book is written - in style similar to the Holmes stories - by Moriarty's version of Watson. Colonel Sebastien "Basher" Moran is a former soldier turned hired assassin, who's become Moriarty's second in command in the Professor's criminal corporation. Moran is a singularly rude, vio...more I thought this sounded quite interesting - an opportunity for a Sherlock Holmes fan to find out more about the nefarious Professor Moriarty. I had high hopes for the book, but found it very disappointing.

First off the book is written - in style similar to the Holmes stories - by Moriarty's version of Watson. Colonel Sebastien "Basher" Moran is a former soldier turned hired assassin, who's become Moriarty's second in command in the Professor's criminal corporation. Moran is a singularly rude, violent and unlikeable character. I found nothing at all about him to be intriguing or quirky, or anything but distasteful.

Of Moriarty himself, there is suprisingly little. We are treated to some of his oddities through Moran's narrative, and there are one or two aspects that I found interesting, but on the whole, there was very small presence of the man who is ostensibly the title character of the book.

The stories themselves - again, similar to the Holmes stories - are presented as individual "operations" or crimes that Moriarty and Basher get up to, and they weren't terrible. There was some creativity in the author's creation of the criminal enterprises Moriarty takes on. But even these were mostly just angry, in Moran's case, and superficially necessary, in Moriarty's, situations for either pleasure or profit. These stories are peopled end-to-end with unpleasant, nasty characters and they are not softened in any way by quirks or idiosyncracies that might make a reader want to like them

You might say: "but this IS a book about a criminal mastermind! What else did you expect?!" Well, I'll tell you what I expected - I expected some level of quirkiness or style on the part of the most well-known and fearsome criminals in the history of fiction! If you're going to write a book purporting to tell the other side of the Holmes mystique, then I expect there will be something about the characters that will somehow make me want to read about Moriarty in the same way that scores of readers devour the Holmes stories year-after-year. That simply was not here for me.

The best part of the entire book, in my opinion, is the preface, which is set decades after the events of the main story, in which a university professor is asked to meet with the last remaining member of the Box Brothers Bank, which has been accused of fraud and is systematically being sold off to pay debtors. Box Brothers is the known favourite of every criminal who wants to keep his ill-gotten gains safe and secret from authorities, but now that there's not much left, the current CEO - Philomela Box is selling off everything she can find - including anything that might have been left in safe deposit boxes at bank headquarters. One of those things is the manuscript written by Moran, which she wants the professor to authenticate so it can be sold for publication. The interaction between these two women, which totals only nine pages of the 476-page book, but is the only portion I would say I throughly enjoyed.

There are, admittedly a few quite good lines in the book. My absolute favourite is: "Crooked as a corkscrew but not half as handy, he'd done some minor minionage about town . . ." As a former, but unwilling minion myself, I found that quite amusing. Also a pretty good line is this: "Les Vampires are French, no more need be said of them!"

On the whole, this book was a big disappointment, and I would not recommend it, particularly if you are hoping for anything even slightly resembling the quirky, off-centre but clever aspects of the Sherlock Holmes stories. I found none of that here.(less)

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Jan 15, 2012 Rozonda rated it 5 of 5 stars

Imagine a Victorian fantasy with Moriarty and Moran taking the place of Holmes and Watson but being perverse, twisted, amoral and cruel. Characters of Victorian related books, comics and movies (and sometimes not-wtf is Bianca Castafiore doing here???)keep popping up and adding to the fun if you reocgnize them, mixed up with perverted, twisted-up Canon characters. Sounds demented??? Well, it is, but it is also brilliantly executed and a lot of fun. Moran as badmouthed, dirty Watson and Irene Adl...more

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Jun 06, 2012 Kelly rated it 4 of 5 stars

It should not surprise you that Kim Newman produced a work like this. Professor Moriarity is a romp through the Holmes mythos. Its fun, clever, and thoroughly entertaining. Its written from the unique perspective of Moriarty's henchman Moran... a fellow who is a cut above the normal sacrificial lambs, and who offers unique insight into the criminal mastermind. If you want a immensely fun read, with no strings attached, removed from the wilted world we often find ourselves in... then by all means...more

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Sep 21, 2012 Caitlin rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: holmesian

A wonderful read. Told through the memoirs of Sebastian Moran, I found I couldn't put the book down. There are some amazingly witty and hilarious moments, spanning from Moriarty's encounter with Irene Adler, Moran's debut at the Royal Opera, and the most fantastic response I've ever read thrown at Professor Moriarty (page 204).
The final page was absolutely gripping, I'd love to read Newman's thoughts on what happened next; and I must say, I loved how Newman incorporated and reinvented some of t...more

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Jan 20, 2013 Devon rated it 5 of 5 stars

I finished reading this book after months of going at it (because I was lazy, not because it wasn't interesting. It was lovely!)

Some of the complaints I've seen on here include that this book has too many references and too many Victorian characters that make it hard to grasp for those not familiar. Know what I say to that--wah! Do you know how exciting it is to see characters that you know and love interacting and perhaps interfering with Messrs M & M? Especially some characters that are no...more

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Jan 29, 2013 Els rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: sherlock-holmes, alternate-history

My overall impression with Newman's novel is mostly "meh" but also a lot of eye-rolling. I found that I was initially excited for Moran's viewpoint and then everything sort of fell flat. From the forced slang, to the descriptions of, "Look how bad I am, I'm so bad I drown puppies," to the weird reptilian thing Moriarty had going on.

Oscillation is not a word you use or read that often but the number of times I read that word in reference to Moriarty probably filled my quota of how many times I n...more My overall impression with Newman's novel is mostly "meh" but also a lot of eye-rolling. I found that I was initially excited for Moran's viewpoint and then everything sort of fell flat. From the forced slang, to the descriptions of, "Look how bad I am, I'm so bad I drown puppies," to the weird reptilian thing Moriarty had going on.

Oscillation is not a word you use or read that often but the number of times I read that word in reference to Moriarty probably filled my quota of how many times I need to come in contact with 'oscillation' in a lifetime. And the "Basher Moran Special" or BMS has Moran likes to abbreviate it to. Apparently everything in a skirt is liable to fall victim to Moran's special form of bedroom antics and that includes Irene Adler (who has a relatively small role in the novel).

I understand that making Moran appear vile is all part of the character and he's racist, and sexist and a bunch of other "-ism's" and "-ist's" that'll take up too much room going over but none of that really added to the character I felt. He is a product of his "time" so Newman making a special point to use a racist phrase but ex out the word (view spoiler) when using Moran's voice was, to me, the equivalent of a fart joke. It's shocking and uncomfortable but overall immature and rarely gets the reactions it intended.

All those things aside though I think the best way to tackle this novel is to talk about the three main characters: Moran, Moriarty and Irene. It's debatable if Irene is really a main character but she does crop up at least once in each story, either in passing or because she's directly involved in that particular storyline. I think Newman did a great disservice to Irene Addler (Chapter Two: A Shambles in Belgravia) and reduced her to a bawdy version of herself that merely traipsed about shaking her boobs at people for amusement. This is supposed to be an alternate universe sort of thing but that doesn't excuse the fact that an intelligent female character was reduced down to a fetishization. I was not amused.

Now as far as Moriarty I'm not really sure what to make of him. The best "performance" Moriarty has is in Chapter Three: The Red Planet League (probably the only chapter worth reading to be honest) where he systematically tears down Sir Nevil Stent. This chapter, out of all seven, shows a Moriarty everyone is more familiar with. He's cold, calculating, and exacts his own personal form of vengeance in the best way he knows how: elaborately. I wish that all the chapter's had been this well thought out, maybe not in the same pattern because that would get old, but it would have made the stories a lot more bearable and less like Newman pasted together individual stories he had written with some transitional sentences. Other than that I didn't find Moriarty terribly impressive or overly diabolical. The thing with the kitten in the first chapter, that was definitely evil (you'll know it once you read it) but for a character that was constantly referred to as being devoid of most emotions and all empirical I didn't see it.

I could rant about Moran but as one review put it, he's an old dog at the end of his glory days. This doesn't really come in to play until the last two chapters but Chapter Seven: The Problem of the Final Adventure really hits you over the head with a hammer about it. It actually creates a problematic overtone because when you reflect back over the other stories there really are not many tie-ins for that sort of arch. Allegedly the seven chapters are suppose to be Moran's coming to Jesus moment wherein he realizes, "I'm too old for this shit," and his number is up. It's also difficult for the reader to grasp time in this universe because the stories are told in a way that makes it feel these events happen in rather close proximity but by the end you realize Moran has been with Moriarty for ten years. Now, there are two arguments for this time displacement. One: is that it's editors oversight. Two: Newman was genius by pulling the reader into this time warp so that when Moran realizes he's spent ten years with Moriarty, the reader is just as shocked as Moran that some much time has gone by. I am disinclined to believe Newman was so forward thinking.

My last comment about the book is really about Newman I think. The Hound of the D'Urberville's is probably enjoyable for people who are familiar with Newman's other novels and are use to his writing style. Having never read anything else by Newman I'm not sure if this is a common thing with his writing but I found the extent to which Newman name dropped other fictional characters a bit exhausting because I had to constantly stop and look these people up to understand the references. The fact that the fake endnotes didn't help were more aggravating than informational because many of the endnotes needed to be looked up as well (with the exclusion of all the Sherlock Holmes references).

I believe it would have been beneficial for Newman to have continued the theme of diary/memoir turned pseudo-autobiography throughout the whole novel. The very beginning introduces Moran's manuscript via a Dr. Christina Temple and I would have liked to see at the end of each chapter a summary or helpful footnotes about the chapter using Dr. Temple's voice. I would also have appreciated an epilogue by Dr. Temple but maybe some pages were torn out of my copy. I can only hope.
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Jul 03, 2012 kho rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: favorites

Who doesn’t love Sherlock Holmes?

I admit, I’m a latecomer to the series, but fell quick and hard for the tall thin man and his ruminating doctor companion. It started with BBC’s Sherlock, then gravitated into the original stories by Author Conan Doyle, by which I’ve read all save for The Casebook of Sherlock Holmes. After, I took to the Basil Rathbone renditions (and I do love his Holmes – more kindly than Benedict Cumberbatch’s, although Cumberbatch seems more spot on with his character).Yet, t...more

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Dec 22, 2012 Nina at Death Books and Tea rated it 5 of 5 stars

Review: Moriarty and Moran-the criminal equivalent of Holmes and Watson. This collection of short stories charts their running around London and the rest of England, living with a woman who runs a brothel, and taking on their fair share of cases.
Literary mashup galore in here! Obviously, the Sherlock-verse is the major recipient of Kim's treatment, but there are characters from many other Victorian stories. The titles are all plays on the more-known Sherlock Holmes stories, and all feature
In th...more Review: Moriarty and Moran-the criminal equivalent of Holmes and Watson. This collection of short stories charts their running around London and the rest of England, living with a woman who runs a brothel, and taking on their fair share of cases.
Literary mashup galore in here! Obviously, the Sherlock-verse is the major recipient of Kim's treatment, but there are characters from many other Victorian stories. The titles are all plays on the more-known Sherlock Holmes stories, and all feature
In the author's note, we're told that the first to be written was A Shambles in Belgravia. In my opinion, this one was the best. The opening line is my favourite in the whole novel: "To Professor Moriarty, she is always that bitch." Compare this to the reverance that Sherlock holds for the same woman, Irene Adler, and you should understand why this book is amazing.
A Volume in Vermillion keeps introductions a rather neat parallel to A Study in Scarlet, before putting Moran in his first spot of trouble. I didn't really enjoy The Red Planet League. It just didn't hold my attention. The Hound of the D'Urbervilles was good at bringing together various literary characters from everywhere, as was The Adventure of the Six Maledictions. The Greek Invertebrate is the best paced story, and The Problem of the Final Adventure brings back characters from the previous stories. It also leaves Sherlock and Moriarty's fates really, really ambiguous.
The stories are written as a set of diaries from Moran. The writing style is very entertaining, with most of it about the case, but a lot of interruptions pertaining to Mrs Halifax's girls and what Moran wants to do with them.
Sebastian Moran is fully built up characterwise, and the kind of guy that you might want to be friends with if you like people loud, strong opinioned and a little mad. It's also good to see his character and his attitudes to things develop with exposure to Moriarty.
Professor James Moriarty. Painted very well, much more elaborately than Conan Doyle ever did. His attitudes are strange and roundabout, and you can't always understand him. I really like what Newman has done-given him two brothers also called James. The Moriarty family are all as eccentric as eachother, but the Professor was my favourite of the three.
He's not my favourite character in the whole thing though. That goes to Sophy, a Greek woman who joins Moriarty's family of crime and is a really good actress. Close second is Irene Adler, who has remained as an opera singer, albeit one that caused a man to kill himself after her performance. In addition to these two women, there's a large cast of criminals and clients making up the supporting cast. Interestingly, Watson is quoted a couple of times as Moran gives his uncomplimentary view on the same event, and Sherlock is reduced to being only "The Thin Man".

Overall: Strength 5 tea to a book taking many things I love and throwing them together.(less)

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Feb 13, 2012 Christine rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: fantasy-and-science-fiction

I had expected to find that a new modern take on the Sherlock Holmes franchise would disappoint me. After all, not many mystery writers can hold a candle to the inventiveness of Arthur Conan Doyle.

I ended up pleasantly surprised with Newman's book. While it is not as good as Doyle's stories (of course) many of the stories are well thought out, clever, and interesting. Moriarty and Basher develop well as characters throughout the book, and who doesn't enjoy reading about crafty villians?

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Feb 20, 2012 Cherise rated it 5 of 5 stars

Truly a must read for any Sherlock Holmes fan. Wonderfully written, completely sucks you in and leaves you wanting more and for it not to end. Moran was painted in a way that was very much in character and yet almost likable in his own way. Kept with the Canon of the characters and yet added it's own twist. Through the whole thing, you don't want to read the original stories, these ones far more gripping, but that final sentence, suddenly, that's all you want to do. Already a top favourite in my...more

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title link	preview: Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles
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