Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces by Jud Wilhite

Feb 27, 2013 Michael Boling rated it 4 of 5 stars

Author, speaker, and pastor Jud Wilhite provides a valuable commentary on the issues we all face when it comes to dealing with understanding the why of suffering, pain, and evil that seems so rampant not just in the world but in our everyday experiences. Many noted scholars, philosophers, and theologians have wrestled with developing a theodicy that holistically answers the problem of evil. C. S. Lewis, N. T. Wright, Alvin Platinga, and others have offered their attempt at analyzing this rather...more Author, speaker, and pastor Jud Wilhite provides a valuable commentary on the issues we all face when it comes to dealing with understanding the why of suffering, pain, and evil that seems so rampant not just in the world but in our everyday experiences. Many noted scholars, philosophers, and theologians have wrestled with developing a theodicy that holistically answers the problem of evil. C. S. Lewis, N. T. Wright, Alvin Platinga, and others have offered their attempt at analyzing this rather perplexing concept of a good and loving and omnipotent God with the seeming unrelenting existence of evil. This is at times one of the reasons why many choose to reject notions of a loving God who has an overall plan of action to deal with evil. Many ask and rightly so, "If God is so powerful then why does he put an end to evil and suffering." This is an especially pointed question given this is the 10th anniversary of the tragic events of September 11, 2001.

Pastor Wilhite does an excellent job of immediately framing the question of suffering to that presented in Scripture. He comments "the most fundamental question, according to the Bible, is who. Who will we trust in the calamities and challenges of life? Who will we turn to in the reality of our pain? Who is worthy of our trust?" He admits the Bible seemingly "refuses to answer why" when it comes to the question of evil. Instead, we are commanded to place our faith and trust in a God who has existed for all eternity and who has promised in his word that in his perfect timing evil will finally be vanquished and wrongs will be righted.

So how do we deal with life on a day to day basis when we either experience pain, suffering, or evil first hand or we see the devastating impact of evil, whether natural or humanities penchant for causing pain and agony against their fellow man? When individuals question God's overarching plan because their parent died a horrifically slow and painful death at the hands of cancer or when innocent children are abused killed by a drunk driver, how can we as believers respond to such tragedy?

These seeming theological conundrums are difficult. Throughout his book, Wilhite utilizes salient stories to demonstrate real world situations where people who experienced difficulty with tragedy nevertheless continued to trust God knowing "they derived their strength from him." Wilhite rightly notes when tragedy strikes, notices this is not an "if" but rather a "when" reality, continually asking God why will typically not result in an answer. Our grief clouds our ability to correctly focus our trust on God. Wilhite avers "the danger with why questions are that they lead to a dark, confusing, frustrating, lonely, disconnected place." When life seems to tear us apart, we have realize that "the universe is truly, utterly, and completely about God - and thus not about me" and then find our "greatest happiness in celebrating this reality."

Perhaps this is best portrayed in the pages of the Psalms, in particular the imprecatory Psalms. David was anointed by God to be the King of Israel yet he seemed to be continually beset on every side by trouble. Saul and his men sought to put him to death forcing him to hide in caves. Even in what appeared to be his darkest hours, David pressed through the why questions of life and placed his faith in the God who has continually proven himself worthy of our trust. Even when the world seems to be spiraling out of control, Wilhite correctly reminds us it is "not spiraling out of God's control. It isn't barreling ahead into an unknown future with a powerless God at the helm. God isn't sitting in heaven wringing his hands in fear. He is bringing his plan to fruition. He is working in our world each day to bring himself glory. In due time he will overthrow Satan, sin, and death."
Wilhite reminds his reader of the life of Job, a man who experienced more tragedy and pain than most any of us will in our lifetime. His family, possessions, and physical health were taken away in a single day. Just like David, Job pressed through his whys instead reorienting his approach to faith in almighty God who has existed from eternity past and who has all things under his control. Wilhite also shares some valuable insights from the early church father Augustine who in his classic book City of God reflects on "Christians being killed, tortured, and raped during the fall of Rome." Despite being persecuted to the point of death, Augustine reminds us of the following:

"Death is not to be regarded as a disaster, when it follows on a good life, for the only thing that makes death evil is what comes after death. Those who must inevitably die ought not to worry overmuch about what accident will cause their death, but about their destination after dying. Christians know that the death of a poor religious man, licked by the tongues of dogs, is far better than the death of a godless rich man, dressed in purple and linen. Why then should those who have lived well be dismayed by the terrors of death in any form."

All in all, Torn is an excellent book. While it is certainly not a philosophical treatise on various past and present scholarly viewpoints of the problem of evil, it is certainly provides more on a practical level than even the best treatises have done. This is due to the approach by Wilhite to continually redirect the reader to not fall prey to asking why, not that asking why is incorrect in itself. Conversely, the message provided in Scripture is to constantly place our faith and trust in a God who has proven himself worthy. Scripture does not claim our lives will be free of tragedy, in fact it says quite the opposite. So in a time when many will be replaying the tragic events of 9/11 either on television, their computer, in conversation or in their minds-eye, we must remember that beyond asking why is the more powerful question of asking who - who will we trust will all seems like it is falling apart? We must keep in mind the words of Psalm 23:4, a powerful verse that Wilhite closes out his timely book with:

"Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me."

If you are looking for in-depth philosophical book on the problem of evil, then I would redirect you to other books on the market. However, if you are looking for an honest, practical and more importantly biblically centric overview on how to deal with difficult issues in life, then Jud Wilhite's Torn is for you.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255 : "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising." (less)

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Sep 04, 2012 Harold Cameron rated it 5 of 5 stars

When I saw the title of this book I just knew I had to get a copy of it and read it and I am glad that I did.

In his very relevant for the times we live in book, the author addresses the age old issue of trusting God when our lives falls apart around us. Having been there myself – that is, having had my world come crashing down on me into thousands of pieces which no mortal could put back together again, (“having broken life and not being able to fix it”); and only God could, I wanted to read aut...more When I saw the title of this book I just knew I had to get a copy of it and read it and I am glad that I did.

In his very relevant for the times we live in book, the author addresses the age old issue of trusting God when our lives falls apart around us. Having been there myself – that is, having had my world come crashing down on me into thousands of pieces which no mortal could put back together again, (“having broken life and not being able to fix it”); and only God could, I wanted to read author Wilhite’s perspective on the matter. In his book he hits the proverbial “nail on the head” in regards to the issue of suffering and what the proper response for a follower of Christ out to be.

The author opens his book with some insights concerning the all too familiar refrain, “It’s not fair” and then moves right on to the question almost everyone invariably asks when their lives fall apart, “Why?” But thankfully and fortunately for us as his reader he does not leave us there for any length of time…rather, he quickly takes us as his reader to the question we should all ask and answer correctly, and that is “Who?” And the “who” is God.

In Chapter 1 the author shares a personal story of friends of his; a story about a family that experienced as he called it, “Dream Detours,” when their infant son suddenly and unexpectedly died. In sharing their story he revealed the depths of their doubt, anger and pain – all very natural and human emotions; but, he also revealed what happened when the parents got the proper view of God in light of their pain and suffering and how they experienced healing as a result. Author Wilhite directs us as his reader to a high view of God and his sovereignty by quoting the Apostle Paul in Colossians 1:15-18 and then rightly states at the end of the chapter, “We can turn ground zero into a sanctuary of worship to God.” And we can, if we choose to do so.

In Chapter 2 the author writes concerning “Reframing Our Expectations;” something which is essential for us to do if we are to enjoy an abundant spiritual life – regardless of our circumstances. I especially enjoyed reading his thoughts about what he refers to as “The New Now” in that chapter.

From Chapters 2 to 9 author Wilhite shares testimonies of a number of different people who have experienced a variety of devastating experiences in their lives – including the acclaimed pastor, teacher and author Charles Haddon Spurgeon and how by directing their attention towards the “Who,” (God); and not the “Why,” for their answers and comfort, they were able to endure their tribulations and suffering and ultimately bring great glory to God. But it was not easy for them as he writes. Oft times the road was long and the way was hard, but the more they focused on God and the glory of his person, the greater the blessing was for them in the midst of their suffering. I do want to refer to Chapter’s 8 and 9 briefly as in them author Wilhite writes about the issues of depression and forgiveness.

I commend him for treating these difficult and sometimes controversial subjects among Christians in the understanding, compassionate and Biblical manner in which he does. He does not proffer any type of quick fix or advocate just attempting to put a spiritual band aid on the issues of depression or forgiveness, nor does he list a litany of short spiritual phrases or even Scriptures that one could quote to be healed. Rather, he calls upon the reader to truly focus on God in all his glory and majesty as well as to “constantly war with our attitude in fighting for joy.” And it is a war of attitude that does require a fight and sometimes the fight seems almost too overwhelming in and of ourselves, and in our own strength, but as the author reminds us in his book through sharing the testimonies of the people he does as well as through the Scriptures, our victory IS in Christ.

And he writes regarding the matter of forgiveness, “A lack of forgiveness is the number-one obstacle to our healing and our joy.” And on that point the author and I agree.

In the end the author provides us with 2 invaluable insights that if we would but accept them and appropriate them in our lives, we would all experience a greater degree of spiritual freedom and the abundant life that Jesus promised. The insights I am referring to are (1). “The world is about God and his glory more than it is about us and our comfort.” And (2) “Whatever you do, don’t go stagnant in your life. Keep moving, keep growing, keep praying, keep screaming, (I liked this one – LOL), and keep searching.” And that just about says it all. If your life is “torn” right now and you are looking for a way to put the pieces of your life back together, I consider this book a must read for you…but if you do read it…read it meditatively and prayerfully…taking the time to absorb what you read and then apply it to your life.

You can download Chapter 1 of the book by going to http://multnomahemails.com/wbmlt/pdf/...

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review"(less)

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May 15, 2012 Jenn LeBow rated it 4 of 5 stars

Though I am not currently experiencing a fresh trauma, I was interested in reading Jud Wilhite's book, Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces, because I saw that he diverts readers from "why" questions about their situations to "who" questions.

Almost seven years ago, my 31-year-old sister, athletic and slender, joyful and generous, died suddenly while she was on her regular brisk morning walk. She was at the top of her game, enjoying professional success and exploring new prospects, a...more Though I am not currently experiencing a fresh trauma, I was interested in reading Jud Wilhite's book, Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces, because I saw that he diverts readers from "why" questions about their situations to "who" questions.

Almost seven years ago, my 31-year-old sister, athletic and slender, joyful and generous, died suddenly while she was on her regular brisk morning walk. She was at the top of her game, enjoying professional success and exploring new prospects, and was only eight weeks away from her wedding day. To say that her death came as a surprise grossly understates our loss; in the ensuing days, we sought to understand our grief and her absence. My experience was that asking "why" didn't help me. A more pertinent question came to my aid, which I'll tell about later.

In Torn, Wilhite acknowledges that sometimes our pain stems from situations that cannot be adequately explained through "why" questions. He does not downplay the pain that people feel when facing death, injury, illness, betrayal, and more; instead he reminds us that "why" questions "lead to a dark, confusing, frustrating, lonely, disconnected place...'why' keeps you stuck in the pain and chokes out the potential to heal." Wilhite steers readers instead to a thorough look at a series of "who" questions. Who is in control? Who is at the center of your attention - the object of your worship? Who is just? Who can mend what is broken?

Inherent in the answers to the "who" questions, according to Wilhite, is the realization that Jesus chose to suffer on our behalf, and that "he put himself in a position alongside us, identifying with us, to redeem us from our suffering." Alongside such heroes of the faith as St. Augustine, Wilhite argues that we will suffer on this earth, and that our living a good life offers no guarantee against pain. So the final "who" question is, "Who loves you?" If you accept that the answer is God, Wilhite says, then your response, even in crisis, will be trust.

And that trust, we read in Torn, leads us to the practical questions, the "how" questions. How will we put some of the pieces back together? Wilhite asserts that living in community with others is essential. In complement to seeking out others, Wilhite suggests that waiting on God in what feels like complete radio silence develops our characters and even brings forth aspects of us that we might never let come to light otherwise. Wilhite's last instructions to those who suffer are to fight for joy and to forgive. They won't come all at once for most people, he argues, but pursuing small moments of joy and taking steps toward forgiveness will help restore a soul consumed by loss.

"How" was the question that I asked when my sister died. How can I get through this? How will I honor God in this pain? How can I reflect her joyous attitude toward others? How will I help others remember her? How will I best honor her memory?

In our pain, Wilhite says, we can feel lost, and "[t]he key to staying alive for those who get desperately lost is not knowing how to be found, but knowing how to survive until they are found."

Wilhite has a winning book in Torn. I will be ready to pass it on to others I know who are hurting, and though I hope I will not have to do so for a long time, the likelihood is that all too soon, a dear friend or family member will have need of the Christian wisdom and practicality contained in this book.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review, but the opinions expressed here are mine.(less)

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Dec 04, 2011 Kate rated it 4 of 5 stars

This book offers hope when hurting, peace from the earth's trials and love from the only one who can ease pain, God. I learned so much from this book and I took my time in reading it so the author's words and thoughts could sink in and I could reflect on what I had read. The personal life stories contained within this well written book tear at your heart and I realized that my life has not been as difficult as what others have endured. This book brings understanding and truth that no matter what...more

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Nov 17, 2011 Cindy Navarro rated it 4 of 5 stars

"When our world comes crashing down, it does more than steal our peace. Something inside us tears. We feel broken, stranded—torn." When I read that on the back cover of the book, I could immediately identify with this statement. Pastor Jud Wilhite has gone through his own moments of being torn and turned to the Bible as he sought comfort and understanding. He also found that rather than asking "Why?", he needed to ask, “Who?”. Who can be trusted to help mend the ripped pieces of your hopes, drea...more

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Jun 28, 2012 Erin rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: inspirational

"Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces" is a book that reads like a candid conversation about real life hardships. It's refreshingly honest and I knew it was going to be good when I came across this gem in the very first chapter:

"[...] the primary equipment you need to trust God in your pain and suffering is your pain and suffering. You already have the necessary tools; you just need the skilled hands of a loving God to wield them."

Wilhite tackles the age old "Why?" question with wi...more

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Nov 20, 2011 Marcus Lynn rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: discipleship

I’ve never read a book by Jud Wilhite, pastor of Central Christian Church in Las Vegas, NV, but I have heard him speak on 2 occasions. I was moved both times by his story-telling as it applied Scriptural truths to my life. In Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces he does the same thing.

He breaks his book into 2 parts: 1) trusting God when torn; and 2) Putting the pieces back together. While I have no criticisms of part one, I found Wilhite at his strongest in part 2, particularly in...more

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Aug 09, 2011 Heidi rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Christians, those who are going through problems,

Recommended to Heidi by: Goodreads giveaway

Shelves: religious-faith-based-christian-lit

As this is a goodreads giveaways book I like to write my review as I go along. This helps me to keep the book fresh in my mind as I go off and do other things, and you (the reader of this review) get the best review that I can do.

Part 1: Trusting God When Torn
I like the layout of this book so far. Reverend Jud Wilhite is not going to let you get lost in babbling. He has a great sense of humor in his writing style. It is almost as if he is sitting in the chair next to me.
There was a few quotes...more As this is a goodreads giveaways book I like to write my review as I go along. This helps me to keep the book fresh in my mind as I go off and do other things, and you (the reader of this review) get the best review that I can do.

Part 1: Trusting God When Torn
I like the layout of this book so far. Reverend Jud Wilhite is not going to let you get lost in babbling. He has a great sense of humor in his writing style. It is almost as if he is sitting in the chair next to me.
There was a few quotes that really hit me as I read so far. The first one was describing how as human beings we compare our suffering to others. Someone always has it worse. Western poverty is not the same as poverty in other areas. However, "perspective provides only so much consolation before it stops providing consolation altogether. (2)" This is so true. Even as Christians it is easy to allow Satan to overcome our trust in God. Rev. Wilhite goes on to say that "Why?" is not the question we should be asking, but who. In "who?" we decide who we trust when the problems of life arise. Why does not bring us the answers that we seek; who, however, can.
Reverend Wilhite spends some time using the story of Job as an example of how we should be. He says that "The Bible is a syringe of adrenaline plunged straight into the heart. (53)" I love that! It really made me think of all of those int he Bible who are torn.

Part 2: Putting the Pieces Back Together
Revernd Wilhite explains that we need to humble ourselves and allow others to help us with our struggles. We have been given a great gift of others to share. Whether those are people in our neighborhood, family, pastor, or The Bible itself that we turn to, they can make our struggles (not easier but) manageable.
I really, really liked the chapters that focus on depression. I think it was a great section that can help those who not only struggle with depression, but those who are family of those who do. He covers the question of medication and therapy with a grace that whatever side of the debate you are on, you can still agree with him. "The Bible indicates that joy is something we choose as much as it is something that happens to us." (148)
The last section (besides the conclusion) is entitled "Learning to Forgive". I love the connections made from stories on forgiveness. The story about Paul and Jayne and Tommy brought tears to my eyes. Forgiveness is a huge part of mending the torn lives that we live.
In the Conclusion Reverend Wilhite says "It may sound like a cheap Sunday school cop-out to suggest that a hurting person read his Bible, pray, and stay connected to the church community. But we don't have to invent new steps to get closer to God and further into healing. The "old" stuff works just fine, if we will actually do it. (175)" I thought this was poignant. Here we are looking for a way to heal our hurt and Reverend Wilhite is reminding us that Christ has laid out a method. It has been preached time and time again, but if we don't trust it, it will not work. We need to put our trust in God and do those things which he has told us to do through his works.

This book would be great for Bible Study classes as it contains a great study guide. I enjoyed sitting and pondering the opening questions before I read. It helped me to focus my study of this book.

My one critique is with the notes. As I am not a member of Rev. Wilhite's congregation I am not familiar with which version of the Bible he is using. I wish it was more specific. Some have NKJV, or KJV after the citation but others do not. I would have liked something like "if not specified these are from the .... version of the Bible", or something to that affect. Small potatoes, I know, but it would make it nice for me.

I did enjoy this book. I have never read one by Reverend Wilhite before, but I would not be opposed to reading his other works if they are in a similar style. Very down to earth.(less)

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Sep 19, 2011 April rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: christian-living

TORN: TRUSTING GOD WHEN LIFE LEAVES YOU IN PIECES by Jud Wilhite is a great Christian Living tool. It is written with details. When every question seems to go unanswered,you wonder why,but God's answers are sometimes hard for us to hear. This book explores your questions as well as God's answers and his mysteries. It gives you practical ways to have joy,deal with depression,anger,make decisions,help a broken heart,your ease your suffering while having a relationship with God. A great resource to...more

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Jan 20, 2012 Emily rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: won-giveaways

I won this book as a free giveaway.

I thought this book was tremendous. While I don't see myself as a "torn" person at the moment (thank God), I still thought that the information and advice the book provided was great. I was particularly impressed with the second half of the book. Each chapter supplied fresh insight and helpful suggestions on how to live life once you've been spiritually/emotionally/mentally/physically torn. There were great Biblical references that the author used to illustrate...more

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Nov 22, 2011 Matthew Miller rated it 5 of 5 stars

Jud wilhite skillfully talks to those in pain or who have known pain. He mixes a personal storytelling style with comforting scripture, practical thoughts and inspired direction. I know that every person at one time or another has been "Torn". There are the questions and the feelings and the searching. Wilhite is not afraid of the tough questions and facing the pain. I found several times where I just had to set the book down so that I could mull over the words and then later continue on.

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Aug 14, 2011 Trina rated it 3 of 5 stars Recommends it for: Goodreads first reads win

Shelves: first-reads

Goodreads Giveaway win!

Written in a conversational tone and references secular things for easy comparisons (movies, TV shows, Apple and Starbucks). Humor and understanding for life's big and small frustrations. Excellent summations of each chapter to clarify main points. The study guide in the book is a great resource to allow someone to talk about their pain with a group through guided discussion.

The best chapter of the book is Chapter 2 Reframing Your Expectations. An excerpt: ".... When God p...more

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Oct 11, 2011 Cindy rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: All

Shelves: finished

I found this book was insightful and full of "How to" Trust in Christ when we don't understand "why" we have this pain. This is a great read for anyone struggling with depression, or dealing with loss. This book is also helpful in counseling or helping someone who is depressed or torn by life's darker moments. I enjoyed the book format and movement, supplying many scriptures from the Bible. Highly recommend

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Oct 07, 2011 Sandy Sandmeyer marked it as to-read

(Thank you so much for using your platform for the Never Beyond poster series. As a way of thanking you, Pastor Jud Wilhite, Mike Foster, and the People of the Second Chance would like to send you a free copy of Pastor Jud’s newest book, Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces.)

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May 10, 2012 Becky Giovagnoni rated it 4 of 5 stars

This is a quick, easy read. Although nothing in it was earth shattering, it was well-written and a good reminder of the truth. I enjoyed the fact that it was clear and simple, especially in light of the fact that talking about a subject that often becomes theologically cumbersome.

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Aug 04, 2012 Angel Smith rated it 4 of 5 stars Recommends it for: those needing encouragement

Just finished reading Torn. Overall I found it to be a very good read. I appreciated the honesty of the Author and his ability to communicate the reality of the emotions that one can experience when being or feeling "Torn".

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Sep 29, 2012 Jessica Weleski rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: faith-development-read

I thought that Wilhite showed a good bit of intuition and experience as he wrote about Torn. I have a review posted to my blog: http://oneenglishteacher.wordpress.co...

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Nov 22, 2011 Melissa rated it 3 of 5 stars

This book came into my possession just one week after the sudden passing of my spouse. To read its pages were painful and necessary as I struggle in what Wilhite describes in the book as the Dark Night of the Soul (Referencing St. John of the Cross). Page after page I am reminded that God was good before my tragedy and He is still good now. I may never know why I entered into these circumstances, but by focusing on the WHO instead of the WHY, I am more apt to see God's blessing through this brok...more

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Sep 22, 2011 Kristina Franken rated it 5 of 5 stars

Shelves: jud-wilhite

Another great book by Jud. Thanks for making it a series.

I bought this book from Central's 242 Cafe and Bookstore and you can too.

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May 26, 2012 Chris Giovagnoni rated it 3 of 5 stars

As good a book as any if you're struggling with distance from God.

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Jun 19, 2011 Michele marked it as to-read

I thik I need this book.

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Jun 19, 2011 Raquel marked it as to-read

I want his book

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Jul 29, 2011 Whoa rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: independent

Goodreads giveaway!

What an awesome self help book. It's really for people who are more religious based, because, as the title says, God is the main element in here.
There's advice in there that helps you rethink situations and how to deal.

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Apr 20, 2012 Lisa rated it 4 of 5 stars

This book was very informative! I found out a lot about myself and the things i need to change in my life....
I would recommend this book to everybody wether you are going through a hard time or not.

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Aug 22, 2011 Fiona rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: first-reads, christian

I received Torn: Trusting God When Life Leaves You in Pieces in a first-reads give away. Take your time reading it. Mull it over and share it with others. Plenty to take in and a very down to earth delivery.

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Jul 08, 2012 Keri rated it 3 of 5 stars

Not my favorite, but I know others like it.

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May 19, 2013 Kim Liles rated it 4 of 5 stars

May 08, 2013 Tyson rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: counseling

Apr 25, 2013 Jessica Brito added it

Apr 22, 2013 Leslie Robl marked it as to-read

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