Craving Grace: A Story of Faith, Failure, and My Search for Sweetness by Lisa Velthouse

May 16, 2011 Kate rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: memoir, review-books

Lisa Velthouse’s distorted view of God at the beginning of Craving Grace reflects how many Christians relate to their Creator. Lisa felt that she had to please God by always doing the right thing lest God cease blessing her or worse yet, smite her for doing the wrong thing. Furthermore, she frequently made bargains with God, promising to do something good in exchange for things going her way. Craving Grace is the story of Lisa’s journey from a works and fear-based relationship with God to grace-...more

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Sep 24, 2012 Amy Kannel rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: memoir, own

the question I found myself asking over and over as I read Craving Grace: Did she really just admit that? It wasn't so much that the thoughts and actions Lisa described were so appalling, because every time I began to raise my eyebrows in judgment, it didn't take long to spot myself in her confession. It was that I couldn't believe she'd own up to such...carnality.

That's not to give a false impression of this book as titillating in its description of sin; it isn't. It's simply that for Lisa to...more the question I found myself asking over and over as I read Craving Grace: Did she really just admit that? It wasn't so much that the thoughts and actions Lisa described were so appalling, because every time I began to raise my eyebrows in judgment, it didn't take long to spot myself in her confession. It was that I couldn't believe she'd own up to such...carnality.

That's not to give a false impression of this book as titillating in its description of sin; it isn't. It's simply that for Lisa to recount her deepest thoughts the way she did took a lot of courage, a lot of humility. I tend to pride myself on being vulnerable and honest—but I typically do it in broad generalizations. The specificity with which Lisa shares the ugliness of her heart is often uncomfortable. Because it is familiar.

Shortly before I read Craving Grace, I read a profound blog post by Lisa that encapsulates exactly what her memoir succeeds in doing:

To write one’s self honestly — to take a day, a month, a year, whatever, and record what actually happened — is not a pretty experience. It’s especially harrowing for those of us who assume we are mostly good. When the veil comes off, when the real thoughts and events and conversations are put to paper, we find that we are not the delightful and winsome people we’d like to think we are. Sometimes we don’t even come close. This is why one of the biggest challenges in writing memoir is presenting the self-character fairly: not skimping on ugly portions, and not giving extra emphasis to attractive ones. There are times when the allure of over- and under-stating can feel constant.

At a most basic level, each of us would like to believe that we are not so flawed as our actions would prove. We’d like to believe we are better, and we’d like to be seen as better. But the gospel of Christ can free us from the desire to masquerade. In him, there’s no need for anything more — no exaggerated trimmings, no theatrical frills — because he is it, and with him we have enough and then some. His light falls on and around and through our sinful realities, and that illuminated darkness is a story worth telling every time. His presence puts meaning in our unseemly and bare details, and makes them spellbinding.
That's the beauty of Craving Grace. As the spotlight falls on Lisa, most of the time, it doesn't flatter her. (She actually is beautiful, at least from what I know, and really no more self-centered than the rest of us; it's just that the way she exposes her sinful heart in this book is more raw than the rest of us dare to let the world see.) Instead, the stories she tells magnify Christ and the sweetness of His grace.

All that to say...I loved the book. “Courageous” is one of the words that came to mind most frequently, in light of Lisa's transparency. But Lisa isn't just honest for authenticity's sake; she uses her honesty to relate the beautiful truths she learned about God along the way.

I did have a few minor complaints/concerns. First, it felt like Lisa was awfully derogatory toward her first book. On one hand, in the context of Craving Grace, I understand where that comes from as far as her journey out of legalism. On the other hand, I wonder how that will affect girls who responded to the first book's message. In her desire to emphasize grace and tear down the “good Christian girl who has to earn God's favor” religion she'd built, Lisa almost seemed to tear down what I think is still valid, not-necessarily-legalistic advice about purity and premarital relationships. Not having read her first book, I'm sort of speculating here, but not too wildly, I don't think.

I will also admit that it kind of seemed a little too convenient that God was sweet when Lisa got what she wanted and the pieces of her life started falling into place. On the other hand—does my skepticism here merely reflect my own warped understanding of God's character? Am I simply too cynical to accept at face value the reality that God lavishly blesses His children with good gifts that they have earnestly desired, even when their desires were often idolatrous?

Which brings me to another concern: While the gospel *was* very clear (yay!), I did notice that Lisa seemed to define sin solely on a horizontal level. Any talk of sin was focused on screwing up in relationships with other people; there wasn't (to my recollection) mention of the underlying idolatry, of sin as an offense against God. While I think that's a serious point of theology, I do recognize that this book is a memoir, not a theological treatise.

Finally, I am familiar with—and appreciate—the creative nonfiction convention of jumping back and forth in a seemingly disjointed yet artistic way. And I think for the most part Lisa used it well (the book alternates between events of three-years-ago and present-at-the-time-of-writing). But I kept flipping back, trying to orient myself. Mostly I was confused about the actual sweets fast(s). Were there multiple (failed) attempts? It's not exactly clear.

Regardless of these minor quibbles, it's really a lovely book. I was hooked from the beginning; the chapter titles alone were brilliant. And the writing delivered on what the table of contents promised. Many times I marked poignant turns of phrase and vivid metaphors. Lisa provides lots of sweet morsels to chew on in her narratives about encountering the God of extravagant grace.
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Jul 05, 2011 Jennifer Short rated it 4 of 5 stars

I rarely think of chick lit as non-fiction, but that is exactly what Lisa Velthouse has created in the book “Craving Grace”. It is funny, girlfriend-y, and laugh out loud funny, and yet is a memoir.

The book starts as Lisa experiences her first kiss. This doesn't sound that big of a deal until you realize she is the author of “Saving My First Kiss: Why I'm keeping confetti in the closet” so she has to deal with the ramifications of being a hypocrite by not living up to the premise of her book. (O...more I rarely think of chick lit as non-fiction, but that is exactly what Lisa Velthouse has created in the book “Craving Grace”. It is funny, girlfriend-y, and laugh out loud funny, and yet is a memoir.

The book starts as Lisa experiences her first kiss. This doesn't sound that big of a deal until you realize she is the author of “Saving My First Kiss: Why I'm keeping confetti in the closet” so she has to deal with the ramifications of being a hypocrite by not living up to the premise of her book. (Or is she a hypocrite? Is she no longer a self-righteous person instead?)

She keeps referring in the book to when she did “The Honey Project” when she fasted from sweets and what she during that time about God, herself, and others. As it went on, she also became more attuned to sweetness in things like ketchup. (Ketchup is sweet? Hmmmm.)

During the course of her tale, she moves into the basement of friends. It sounds like an ideal situation to me, but she obsesses over if she's doing enough chores and other things, such as sitting on the kitchen counter and leaving a pair of panties in the dryer accidentally.

The book is entitled “Craving Grace”, and Grace is exactly what Velthouse discovers. From reaction from others when she had her first kiss. From when she eats sweets during “The Honey Project”. And maybe that annoying man with the out of date hair cut in the drive through in front of her with a bunch of Christian bumper stickers. . . maybe . . . just maybe. . . he's not as obnoxious as she first thought.

I very much enjoyed this book (with the exception of her description of an annoying pastor. He reminded me too much of someone out of my past! But then again that's a trait of good writing!) I recommend this book to any woman who would like to explore the concept of grace in a lighthearted, fun way, or any lover of chick lit. You did know chick lit doesn't need to be fiction, didn't you?

I received this book from from the publisher as part of their summer reading program. The opinions of the review are my own.(less)

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Jun 24, 2011 Pat W. Kirk rated it 3 of 5 stars

This book may have begun as a diary of Lisa’s six-month fast from sweets. The reader sees her maturing spiritually and chronologically. Lisa spends her life trying to do good to earn God’s approval. Her commitment is impressive. So, to get it right, she decides to do more—she embarks on a fast from sweets for six months. When she starts, her faith feels flat to her. But it isn’t until she finds herself failing at things she had committed her life to—like saving her first kiss—she even wrote a bo...more

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May 01, 2011 Joanna rated it 5 of 5 stars

Craving Grace, by Lisa Velthouse, came as a breath of fresh air. I love memoirs, but it has been a while since I have read a memoir of faith. I am glad that this is the story that broke that drought because I found it relatable, refreshing, accessible, and extremely timely for me personally.

So many nonfiction books written within and for the Christian community seem to have some unspoken assumptions: you are new to the faith and had a spectacular conversion story, or you are a long-time Christia...more Craving Grace, by Lisa Velthouse, came as a breath of fresh air. I love memoirs, but it has been a while since I have read a memoir of faith. I am glad that this is the story that broke that drought because I found it relatable, refreshing, accessible, and extremely timely for me personally.

So many nonfiction books written within and for the Christian community seem to have some unspoken assumptions: you are new to the faith and had a spectacular conversion story, or you are a long-time Christian who is looking to refine and improve your understanding of the intricate, challengine aspects of theology and walking with the Lord. Lisa Velthouse, however, bravely presents her story of a nearly life-long Christian who came to a true understanding of God's grace after doubts, struggles, and many years of thinking she knew what it was all about.

I particularly appreciated Velthouse's honesty about her doubts, her pitfalls, her falling short, and her admitted self-righteousness. I found Velthouse, while telling her story, telling my story, too. I, too, grew up in the church and became a Christian at a young age; I, too, lived under the false belief that I needed to do everything right in order to convince God that he should give me good things; I, too, had wrestled with doubts and come to a new understanding of God's grace and goodness.

Velthouse's theology was strong and Biblical, and her writing was delightful, humorous, and self-deprecating without being grating. I found myself taking courage from her stories of her struggle with trying to perform, paying off her debt, and facing her deepest, darkest flaws and failures. Her book drove me to seek out Scripture and reimmerse myself in passages I love, and I was sad to see it end.

As I mentioned before, this book was an extremely timely read for me. It was exactly what I needed to read, and, again, I am so thankful that Velthouse chose to share her story. It may not fit our skewed, cookie-cutter idea of what the Christian life should be, but it reflects the much more realistic and true reality that walking with the Lord is a journey, and we are always in need of His strength, guidance, and wisdom to stay on the path.

I hope Velthouse continues to write because I will read it!

**I read an advanced copy through NetGalley**(less)

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Apr 14, 2012 Pilar rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: tyndale-book-review

Craving Grace is a memoir about faith, failure and her search for sweetness. The premise of this book is the author's struggle and experiences while fasting from sugar, which she refers to as the Honey Project.

"I began fasting from sweets, and suddenly I started having trouble being good. I started having a lot of trouble being good. Wherever I turned, I was making mistakes, hurting people, being misunderstood, and making a mess of things. This didn't make sense, because I was still trying to be...more Craving Grace is a memoir about faith, failure and her search for sweetness. The premise of this book is the author's struggle and experiences while fasting from sugar, which she refers to as the Honey Project.

"I began fasting from sweets, and suddenly I started having trouble being good. I started having a lot of trouble being good. Wherever I turned, I was making mistakes, hurting people, being misunderstood, and making a mess of things. This didn't make sense, because I was still trying to behave in the same careful way I had always behaved."

Isn't this the case? In that we earnestly seek to win God's approval by our works. We tell ourselves if we could only try a little bit harder, follow all the rules and be more disciplined, that maybe, just maybe we'll get His attention.

We go about assigning ourselves rules and regulations believing that if we do it flawlessly and without fail, He will loves us more and/or answer our prayers. Thankfully, that's not how grace works. Grace isn't something we can earn, but something He gives to us freely.

The following excerpt capsulizes this book for me:

"Having been accepted--more than accepted, loved--by God for exactly who they are, they can be less afraid of being rejected by people, less afraid of knowing and being known. Understanding that Christ became vulnerable for them to the point of death, they allow themselves to be vulnerable too. As recipients of God's grace, they themselves become more gracious, less judgmental toward others. They learn to accept and relish the truth that no one person is more deserving of God than any other. This shatters walls everywhere."

Overall, I think Lisa Velthouse is a good writer and her memoir Craving Grace is an interesting read. However, what I didn't anticipate was how the chapters didn't follow in sequence, but jumped around a lot. I honestly didn't enjoy that aspect of the book and personally found it to be counterintuitive.

In conclusion, I would recommend this book to young adult single women.

I want to personally extend a big thank you to Stephanie S. Smith of (In)dialogue Communications and Tyndale Publishers for sending me a complimentary copy of this book to review. (less)

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May 11, 2011 Melissa rated it 3 of 5 stars

Craving Grace by Lisa Velthouse is a good book. I have to say it took me a while to get into this book though. I very much I identified with this book in some ways. This book is about someone who practiced her faith for a long time by obeying the rules. The odd thing is that she was so busy obeying that she was not getting the love and relationship she needed from God. She could not get past the rules and felt like not matter what she did whether it meant saving her fist kiss , going to church o...more Craving Grace by Lisa Velthouse is a good book. I have to say it took me a while to get into this book though. I very much I identified with this book in some ways. This book is about someone who practiced her faith for a long time by obeying the rules. The odd thing is that she was so busy obeying that she was not getting the love and relationship she needed from God. She could not get past the rules and felt like not matter what she did whether it meant saving her fist kiss , going to church or living in a home close to her parents and work when all others her age where in way more happing places she never felt right. She never felt like she could do or live up to all the rules. She found her self alone in some ways. I have to say I have been so busy trying to do the right thing to go buy rules that I to have missed out on my relationship with God at least one that is deep. Then it happened after what seemed like the millionth sermon at church on the subject of sheep ( they bored her) she heard a documentary about how the sheep get so full of fleece that they fall over and have to be picked up right be fore the time to be sheered and it hit her. She was seeing her life like the sheep. It started the wheels a turning. Her life took on some twist and turns that she never would have expected. During this time of learning for her Lisa fasted and gave up sweets to get closer to God. This book takes you through this time in her life. The book is 244 pages and has a wonderful not page at the end with scripture. This book will get you thinking. It is good when a book makes you stop and take time even if it is a few seconds to really think about things, your life and your relationships with God. I give this book three stars. The reason I am not giving it a higher rating is because it did take me a while to get into it. I love books to just grab me this one did not. I would recommend you try reading this because I did get something out of it.
This is the time in the blog where I have to tell you to comply with new regulations introduced by the Federal Trade Commission I was provided this complimentary book by Tyndale House Publishers. The opinions are my own.
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Jun 14, 2011 Jenny rated it 1 of 5 stars

When I read the synopsis of this book, I was really intrigued and excited to give it a read. But when I started reading it, it became a different story. The time line kept switching and the author's thoughts were so circular and confusing that I had a hard time understanding where we were time line wise and what was going on.
Yes I realize that the chapter titles were the time line, but even in the midst of those chapters, it appeared as though she was switching around. I couldn't really get a go...more

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Sep 12, 2011 Julia rated it 2 of 5 stars

Shelves: non-fiction, christian

I read this book as a part of a book club, and everyone in the group really enjoyed it. I admit that I didn't enjoy it as much as everyone else, probably because I made the mistake of reading the end before I read the middle.

This book has a great message about grace and needing God. The part that had the most impact on me was an explanation of the passage "He leads me to green pastures." Green pastures don't have the same meaning in the middle east as they do here in the U.S. In Jesus' time, a...more

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Jun 17, 2011 Books to the Sky rated it 1 of 5 stars

When I read the synopsis of this book, I was really intrigued and excited to give it a read. But when I started reading it, it became a different story. The time line kept switching and the author's thoughts were so circular and confusing that I had a hard time understanding where we were time line wise and what was going on.
Yes I realize that the chapter titles were the time line, but even in the midst of those chapters, it appeared as though she was switching around. I couldn't really get a go...more

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Mar 06, 2013 Mandy rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: mandys-reads

I have to begin by saying I did not get to finish this book. So if you want to stop reading here, I don't hold it against you.

That being said, I liked what I read well enough, and certainly appreciated her overall point. Again, in the part I read. But it simply wasn't my style. I have too many book - like 300+ - on my to-read shelf to use my time reading something that isn't keeping my attention.

Since I didn't read the whole book I can't really recommend it, but I will say that if you don't have...more

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Jun 25, 2011 Bluerose's Heart rated it 3 of 5 stars

Shelves: christian, non-fiction

It's important to know that I don't like memoirs. I never have. I'm not a huge non-fiction reader, although I usually have at least 2-3 of them going at a time. I read them very slowly, though. Memoirs...I have to read them painfully slow!

When I decided to review this book, I thought it was a fiction book, and it seemed really interesting. Unfortunately, this is the second time I've mistaken a memoir for a fiction book. (I know, right!) :) And after I got the book, it plainly says {a memoir} ri...more

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Jul 20, 2011 Allyson rated it 2 of 5 stars

This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. The book is about discovering that God calls Christians to live by his sweet grace, not by works. She discovers this during a six month fast of sweets, and calls her fast The Honey Project - in the quest for discovering God’s sweetness. Unfortunately, with the way the author skips around temporally and jumps from one anecdote to the next with no logical connections, it’s hard to gather all of that. If I were an editor, I would never have picked this project up.

The biggest problem with the novel...more The book is about discovering that God calls Christians to live by his sweet grace, not by works. She discovers this during a six month fast of sweets, and calls her fast The Honey Project - in the quest for discovering God’s sweetness. Unfortunately, with the way the author skips around temporally and jumps from one anecdote to the next with no logical connections, it’s hard to gather all of that. If I were an editor, I would never have picked this project up.

The biggest problem with the novel is its temporal structure. Most stories can get away with jumping around in time because there’s a parallel structure going on and it’s tight enough that there’s no question where in time the reader is being taken. Unfortunately in nonfiction, writers have to be much more careful about jumping around because of the potential to lose and confuse readers. It didn’t take long for me to get lost in the temporal space the memoir was trying to occupy. By the end of the fourth chapter I felt very uneasy and uncertain where the author is temporally. She gives no year references or month references and it left me feeling confused and lost. I wish she had created a more rigid Before, During, and After format with occasional flash backs. When things tie together, the inclusion makes sense. The way Craving Grace stands, not much included makes sense.

In addition, she has too many little anecdotes that didn’t really tie in neatly together, or it isn’t entirely clear why they are in there and how it relates to her discovery of God’s sweetness. I would have wanted one or two really powerful stories that she could have developed in to more complete scenes and interior reflection. All I got is a bunch of scene summaries, which left me feeling like she is withholding too much from readers and that she isn’t fully ready to put everything out there. She could have avoided the task of creating composite characters because she can rename the characters that are already in those one or two really strong stories (if she didn’t want to name names).

It’s a mantra in the writing community - Show, Don’t Tell.

I’m disappointed she never really elaborated on the Ray VanderLaan moment, or the moment with the friend, Drew, who talks about what it is like fasting. Those moments continually come back into Lisa’s narrative, but she never fully comes on to explaining why she is coming back to it and I was again left feeling like she is holding back from really coming on to an epiphany or “ah ha” moment. Those are two powerful moments in her spiritual and personal life that I would have liked to see more clearly developed through out the piece. Instead she focuses on how much of a failure her love life is and how she has terrible financial habits, which I felt was not the focus of the book.

I wanted to see more of the fast. I wanted her to go in depth, get really gritty and brutally honest and I only got mentions of it and it annoyed me as a reader. I wanted more of Lisa in that book and I felt continually robbed when she was on the brink of a realization and then she’d end the chapter. I wanted her to really get in depth and flesh out the implications of this amazing discovery of God’s sweetness in her life and she never did.

In summary, stronger timeline, fewer strong moments that go really in depth and bring us into Lisa’s world, tie everything together in a neat little bow. The premise is really great but it gets lost in all of the jumps and loosely tied together anecdotes. It could have been a great book but it falls short due to its flightiness and temporal jumps.(less)

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Mar 08, 2013 Alan rated it 4 of 5 stars

Shelves: history-bio, theology-religious

Terrific memoir of faith, of dealing with failure, and receiving grace. Longer review here:
http://eyesandearsblog.blogspot.com/2...

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Sep 07, 2011 writer... rated it 3 of 5 stars

how do we move from knowing about God to knowing God? by more diligence, more duty, more effort? or might it be by spending time together pursuing relationship?
are we craving God - craving God as Grace?
or are we pursuing performance - our own?
savour the sweetness of 'Craving Grace' as Lisa Velthouse invites us on her spiritual journey into flavourful tastes of new ways of living...

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