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Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness
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Forgive for Good: A Proven Prescription for Health and Happiness

3.97  ·  Rating Details ·  529 Ratings  ·  58 Reviews
Based on scientific research, this groundbreaking study from the frontiers of psychology and medicine offers startling new insight into the healing powers and medical benefits of forgiveness. Through vivid examples (including his work with victims from both sides of Northern Ireland’s civil war), Dr. Fred Luskin offers a proven nine-step forgiveness method that makes it po ...more
ebook, 240 pages
Published August 17th 2010 by HarperCollins e-books (first published December 24th 2001)
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Suzy
May 08, 2008 Suzy rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
this book is really amazing and it had some unexpected benefits. i was trying to figure out how to forgive intentionally when it was really hard for me, instead of just letting it happen naturally over time. this book taught me how to do that, but also, and more powerfully, it gave me the skill of actually forgiving while something i don't really like is going on, instead of letting it bother me in the first place. unbelievable!

even better, i learned how to forgive myself, which has allowed me
...more
عــــادي
Mar 14, 2011 عــــادي rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Recommends it for: قراءته
في البدايه أشوف أن عنوان الكتاب غير جذاب ولا يشبه محتواه.. والصراحه أنا اشتريته مضطرا كوني دخلت المكتبه وهي على وشك الإغلاق فلم أشاء العودة خالي الوفاض فما كان مني الا أن انتشلت هذا الكتاب من عند المحاسب.. الا اني عندما قرأته وأدركت فكرته قدرته كثيرا وحقيقة كان مقنع ومؤثر واستفدت منه

فكرة الكتاب :

تقولك ركز في المستقبل أكثر وإترك عنك الماضي فلن تغير فيه شيئا

أعتقد العنوان يفترض ان يكون العفو خير لكم وليس خيرا لكم؟

فقرات من الكتاب
--------------
.. استئجار مساحة كبيره لخيبة الامل
 عقلك منزلك.. فلمن تؤجر
...more
Laurie
Sep 03, 2013 Laurie rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
"Of the seven deadly sins, anger is possibly the most fun.

To lick your wounds, to smack your lips over grievances long past, to roll over
your tongue the prospect of bitter confrontations still to come, to savor to the
last toothsome morsel both the pain you are given and the pain you are giving
back--in many ways it is a feast fit for a king.

The chief drawback is what you are wolfing down is yourself.

The skeleton at the feast is you."

Frederick Buechner

This quote says it all.

Luskin helped me to se
...more
booklady
What is forgiveness?
'Forgiveness is the feeling of peace that emerges as you take your hurt less personally, take responsibility for how you feel, and become a hero instead of a victim in the story you tell. Forgiveness is the experience of peace in the present moment. Forgiveness does not change the past, but it changes the present. Forgiveness means that even though you are wounded you choose to hurt and suffer less. Forgiveness means you become a part of the solution. Forgiveness is the under
...more
Ross Aalgaard
Jun 15, 2011 Ross Aalgaard rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The book is a good read, although the writing is not all that great. What makes it good is the timeless truth regarding forgiveness and the practical ways suggested for people live within forgiveness. I will recommend it to others.
Greg
Jan 24, 2017 Greg rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Have you been fuming about things that have happened years ago? Waiting for justice and apologies? How much longer do you want to be living the past? This book will help you move on!
Gil Bradshaw
Aug 01, 2011 Gil Bradshaw rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I read about this book in the Wall Street Journal's July 29th Personal Journal and picked it up on amazon.com.

In this book, Luskin finds that forgiveness (both asking for it and granting it) can be good for your health. It lowers blood pressure, decreases depression, and has a positive effect on the nervous system.

I think this is an important concept that my religion often teaches and I read this book because I wanted to get a secular perspective on forgiveness.

I will be honest, I believe thi
...more
Susan
Aug 22, 2011 Susan rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I picked up this book at a local library book giveaway. The timing was right for me to be dealing with a long-time grievance/injustice that I haven't been able to escape.

It's a secular book explaining the whys and hows of forgiveness. The author is not a Language Arts major (his writing isn't "pretty" or eloquent), but he does make some points that I found helpful. I read the book quickly, as the subject matter was important to me.

Forgiveness is one of those issues you know you are supposed to
...more
Rochelle
Jun 15, 2012 Rochelle rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
The only way I would have improved this book was in its format. However, it was a doctoral thesis project and the data was presented as part of a study. Other than that, I felt like the author clearly stated his intentions at the outset and kept his promise to the reader, to teach them the mechanics of forgiveness, to take it out of a somewhat foggy, semi-religious arena to reintroduce it as a skill which can be learned. I liked the fact that he revisits the basic ideas introduced at the beginni ...more
Margit Sage
Note: I didn't finish this book, but I don't think I need it at this point. I am a much more mindful person than I was in years past.

I think the process this book teaches will be really good for me. My dad was horrible about holding grudges, and I haven't been a hell of a lot better. I do forgive him for influencing my behavior, and take responsibility for my behavior as an adult. My husband has gotten me to lighten up some over the years, but I still have some work to do in the area of forgiven
...more
Alonzo
Dec 25, 2013 Alonzo rated it it was amazing
This is an excellent book. I thought I knew how to forgive, but when something happened that seemed to turn my world upside down, this book was one key for me to getting myself back right-side-up.

If you have any grievances that you can't stop thinking or talking about, you owe it to yourself and your sanity to read this book and to use the tools to get your life back.

You don't have to rent the space in your head to those who have hurt you, even if it is you that you need to forgive. Dr. Fred Lu
...more
Michelle
The content of this book was so disorganized. And like all self-help and business books, it all could have been said in a much shorter time. In fact, I even found the main points towards the end and wished I'd just read those. You can also find them here: http://learningtoforgive.com/9-steps/

I liked the metaphors Luskin uses, such as seeing our grudges as space we could be using that is being rented out to old grievances. My only remaining question that I wish I could pose to Mr. Luskin is this:
...more
Suzette
May 13, 2009 Suzette rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: healthcare
Insightful and easy-to-read. Dr. Luskin's research and study on forgiveness is compelling and convincing in his case on why we need to be more forgiving in our lives towards the people and situations that we may still be holding a grudge against. I have this problem, and was wondering how I could overcome feeling stuck in certain areas of my life. I don't claim this alot, but the lightbulb went off as I began to read this book, and I felt lighter and more calm as I continued. Definitely worth a ...more
Jowie
Jan 20, 2015 Jowie rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I was reading this book for a class. I found it extremely practical and straight forward. This novel teaches the importance of forgiveness and how to forgive without incorporating a religious aspect. This is important because many people choose not to forgive or think they cannot forgive because they will be showing weakness that is often associated with religion. However, Luskin provides scientific evidence to the benefits of forgiveness. There are some minor spelling and sentence errors.
Heidi
Oct 01, 2014 Heidi rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
I will admit, I haven't applied this completely, and I just skimmed the last chapters because they are what you read when you have been on the path to forgiveness and have a beyond. I haven't completely applied these teachings, but what I read, and the little I did practice seemed beneficial. I hope after fully applying it, I have the success I've been looking for.
Albert Hong
Mar 21, 2016 Albert Hong rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: community
This was really helpful in trying to work through my own issues of unforgiveness. Some really important concepts:

1) Emotions are controllable.
2) You can define what narrative expresses your life
3) We can live our lives by unenforceable rules and get angry or hurt when those rules are broken.

I'm going to recommend this for a few folks who are working through their own unforgiveness stuff.
Kim
Jun 05, 2013 Kim rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: non-fiction
The writing isn't great and his ideas aren't even all that original. The book is filled with anecdotes, especially the first half. I think it could have been smaller. That said, I really did like the second half of the book where he writes about "how to do it" and I can see why this book has helped so many people.
Scott Moore
Oct 13, 2012 Scott Moore rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: christian-growth
Next to the Bible, this is the best book I have ever read regarding the necessity for forgiveness. The illustration regarding landing the planes that represent my unwillingness to forgive that have been circling around for years in the air space of my mind was especially helpful. I highly recommend this book!
Kathleen
Dec 15, 2015 Kathleen rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is a lovely book for people who are holding onto grudges. Author Fred Luskin describes how he and his Forgiveness Project at Stanford University have found that there are negative health ramifications for people who cannot forgive. Luskin presents specific techniques people can use that help them get beyond their grievances, even while keeping themselves protected from additional hurt.
Meg Lynch
Oct 06, 2014 Meg Lynch rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Some very good ways to think about grievances, unenforceable rules and grudges, as well as how to forgive injuries and betrayals. Brings in elements of other approaches, such as meditation and HeartMath. An important section for me was on forgiving one's self. On the downside, it was somewhat repetitive, but that meant I could read it quickly!
Trung Thieu
This book should be shorter and better editted

The key messages were repeated over and over again through an unattractive voice.
It also has so many typos. Hopefully this only happens for the electronic version.
Andrea
Jul 24, 2011 Andrea rated it liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: my-best-life
The ideas in this book are great and helpful--I've taken lots of notes. The writing could be better, though--lots of repetition and "infomercial" kind of writing. If you can wade through that, there is good stuff in here about what forgiveness is and how it can help you have a better life.
Danielle
Dec 06, 2015 Danielle rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
This book is so informative. Lots and lots of practical advice and examples to go with it. It's a great resource if you struggle with unforgiveness...or even just want to become a more forgiving person!
Mimi Wolf
I have heard Fred Luskin speak and he inspired me to pick up his book. The book is mostly a series of stories about Fred's interactions with treating individuals with dealing with personal turmoil. I find this style of writing to be a cop out and not very useful.
Sharon Martin
Oct 31, 2014 Sharon Martin rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
Shelves: self-help
I will be recommending this book to many. I found it well written and full of useful strategies.
I do think more time could have been spent on helping the reader to not take hurts personally. This is a tall order and only glossed over by the author.
Awakeatone
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
Sarah
Jun 11, 2008 Sarah rated it really liked it  ·  review of another edition
This is the first book that I have read after reading about it on goodreads. It was really helpful in changing my mood and working through all the grudges I hold. I feel like most people I know could get something out of reading this book. I've been recommending it to tons of people lately.
Michael Swan
Sep 11, 2014 Michael Swan rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
A great secular view on what many might disregard as a religious topic. Luskin brings both empirical research and his experienced, yet subjective, thoughts to bear on the subject. This is a book that I could see improving many people's lives if they give it a chance and keep an open mind.
Priscilla
Jul 08, 2009 Priscilla is currently reading it  ·  review of another edition
'Am on page 46 now.. more to go.. guess 200 pages more..well i just started reading it last..July 3...nice one! It gives tranqulity and peace of mind to oneself....Thus the saying.. To forgive is human and to Err is divine..
Karen
Sep 30, 2010 Karen rated it it was amazing  ·  review of another edition
I LOVE self help books. If they made a self help book about how to spend less money on self help books I would buy it for sure. I am really enjoying this book and feel that I have gotten a lot of useful advice from it, hopefully it will stick.
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It's a book of lots of forgiveness.. 1 5 Jul 08, 2009 08:40PM  
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  • Prayer Primer: Igniting a Fire Within
  • How to Win the Culture War: A Christian Battle Plan for a Society in Crisis
  • When the Well Runs Dry: Prayer Beyond the Beginnings
  • The One Thing Is Three: How the Most Holy Trinity Explains Everything
  • Forgiveness Is a Choice
  • Gratitude Works!: A Twenty-One-Day Program for Creating Emotional Prosperity
  • Uniformity with God's Will
  • Forgiving the Dead Man Walking: Only One Woman Can Tell the Entire Story
  • Dare to Forgive: The Power of Letting Go & Moving on
  • Making Gay Okay: How Rationalizing Homosexual Behavior Is Changing Everything
  • Interior Freedom
  • Music of Silence: A Sacred Journey Through the Hours of the Day
  • Markings
  • Abuse of Language—Abuse of Power
  • Surrender! The Life Changing Power of Doing God's Will
  • Life Is Worth Living
  • Poustinia: Encountering God in Silence, Solitude and Prayer (Madonna House Classics Vol.1)

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“forgiveness helps people control their emotions so they maintain good judgment. They do not waste precious energy trapped in anger and hurt over things they can do nothing about. Forgiveness acknowledges we can’t change the past. Forgiveness allows us not to stay stuck in the past.” 3 likes
“Dr. Luskin lifts forgiveness out of the purely psychological and religious domains and anchors it in science, medicine, and health. This book is vitally needed.” —Larry Dossey, M.D., author of Healing Words “Simply the best book on the subject, adding sophistication and depth to our instinctive but sometimes uncertain understanding of how forgiveness heals both those forgiven and those who forgive. Luskin’s research also shows how modern psychology can enrich traditional moral teachings. His book will stand as a modern classic in psychology.” —Michael Murphy, cofounder of the Esalen Institute and author of Future of the Body “Combining groundbreaking research with a proven methodology, Forgive for Good is an accessible and practical guide to learning the power of forgiveness.” —John Gray, Ph.D., author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus “Straightforward, sincere, and essential.” —Dave Pelzer, author of A Child Called It and Help Yourself “A rare and marvelous book—warm, loving, solidly researched, and wise. It could change your life.” —George Leonard, author of Mastery and president of the Esalen Institute “Dr. Luskin’s wise and clinically astute methods for finding forgiveness could not be more timely … a sure-handed guide through the painful emotions of hurt, sadness and anger towards a resolution that makes peace with the past, soothes the present, and liberates the future.” 0 likes
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