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1st out of 52 books
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22 voters
I Am Not Esther
by
Fleur Beale
Imagine that your mother tells you she's going away. She is going to leave you with relatives you've never heard of - and they are members of a strict religious cult. Your name is changed, and you are forced to follow the severe set of social standards set by the cult. There is no television, no radio, no newspaper. No mirrors. You must wear long, modest clothes. You don't...more
Paperback, 256 pages
Published
July 1st 2004
by Disney-Hyperion
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I really enjoyed this book, I thought the plot was great and enjoyed the characters even "grey Uncle Caleb."
Too often I have found that YA books are full of doom and gloom and angst. They try to tackle very heavy subjects, without entertainment or a satisfactory conclusion. I picked up this book after hearing a great book-talk about it and after scanning the blurb was reluctant to read it, but I was very pleasantly surprised. Although it did deal with a fairly heavy subject (religion/cult), it w...more
Too often I have found that YA books are full of doom and gloom and angst. They try to tackle very heavy subjects, without entertainment or a satisfactory conclusion. I picked up this book after hearing a great book-talk about it and after scanning the blurb was reluctant to read it, but I was very pleasantly surprised. Although it did deal with a fairly heavy subject (religion/cult), it w...more
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What would you do if your mom packed her stuff and went away to Africa, leaving you with family you've never once met? What if they don't have anything to do with the real world, and all they do is worship God?
Kirby can't watch TV, go online, read books or have anything to do with modern life. Her life must revolve around God and God only. It's a horrible lifestyle she lives. And her name is now Esther.
The plot line was fantastic and I have actually had a chance to meet this author who was lovel...more
Kirby can't watch TV, go online, read books or have anything to do with modern life. Her life must revolve around God and God only. It's a horrible lifestyle she lives. And her name is now Esther.
The plot line was fantastic and I have actually had a chance to meet this author who was lovel...more
Kirby’s Mum’s a great nurse, but not very organized. Still, that’s okay. Fourteen-year-old Kirby’s efficient enough for two. Then Mum announces they’re moving. Kirby finds herself living among religious relatives who insist on calling her Esther and make her dress and act like a character from history. She’d like to run away, but where can she run? In Wellington, New Zealand, Kirby has no friends, no relatives beyond the strangers she’s told are family, and no hope.
Soon a burgeoning care for her...more
Soon a burgeoning care for her...more
I was perusing the YA shelves while my son was and grabbed this one. The language was simple, and it was rather predictable, but it managed to keep me entirely ticked off through the whole thing!
It reaffirmed my opinion that there is no reason that you should ever forsake your children...and most certainly not in the name of your religion! It also reaffirmed my theory that most- if not all- members of these ridiculous cult-like backward communities that do not allow any outside influence, school...more
It reaffirmed my opinion that there is no reason that you should ever forsake your children...and most certainly not in the name of your religion! It also reaffirmed my theory that most- if not all- members of these ridiculous cult-like backward communities that do not allow any outside influence, school...more
My step-sister told me that it was one of her comfort re-reads growing up and I can see why. The main character is very real and it is easy to identify with her. It’s a story about being an outsider, and one who doesn’t understand the society she is thrust into – something that many teenagers identify with whole-heartedly. It’s also a novel that has an unusual society within recognisable NZ and one that is absorbing and magnetic because of its difference and the rumours and mistrust that abound...more
I really like this book, it was easy to read and don't took a lot of time. It remind me of two communities near the town I lived in my childhood in Chihuahua, Mexico, they are called "menonitas" (Amish) and I don't know much about their religion but I remember that they couldn't watch T.V. or listen the radio, the men at very young age do the work in the fields and the women and girls do all the housework including the cooking. I also remember their women dressed like in this book, like I said t...more
I picked this book up on a whim and it actually turned out to be a decent read. I knew that it would freak me out, as all novels with themes of abandonment and repression tend to do that, but I wanted to see what Kirby's reaction to all of the horrid things happening to her would be. And, yes, I kept thinking of the little pink video game character whenever her real name came up.
Her reactions to some things seemed to come from nowhere. As it's in first person I expected to see the build-up to he...more
Her reactions to some things seemed to come from nowhere. As it's in first person I expected to see the build-up to he...more
People that know me well know that the over- religious really freak me out and so this book was very disturbing to me.
The plot was a good idea, but not well executed. The character initially struggled with her identity changes, but I felt like the internal struggle was over shadowed by the focus on external rebellion. I would like to have read more of Kirby's internal dialogue that leads to the rebellious acts and less about the acts themselves. Which leads me to the predictable ending... it was...more
The plot was a good idea, but not well executed. The character initially struggled with her identity changes, but I felt like the internal struggle was over shadowed by the focus on external rebellion. I would like to have read more of Kirby's internal dialogue that leads to the rebellious acts and less about the acts themselves. Which leads me to the predictable ending... it was...more
I read this whole book in one sitting, cover to cover. It brings out so many emotions and thoughts and was a fascinating read. I can`t imagine people living that way as they were in the cult and I really can`t imagine being Kirby forced to become Esther and adopting new rules and expectations that she was forced to follow.
While I did sympathize with Ellen, Kirby`s mother and what she was going through, I cannot for the life of me understand her leaving her daughter with the cult that she herself...more
While I did sympathize with Ellen, Kirby`s mother and what she was going through, I cannot for the life of me understand her leaving her daughter with the cult that she herself...more
I chose this book because i got it at the readers and writers festival and was highly recommended.
A good quote is "I am not Esther" which is "Kirby's" catchphrase.Kirby is the main character and she remains strong through out the book insisting she is not Esther which is what the cult are trying to tell her.
Something i learned from this book is that even a cult can be set up in NZ and i thought that it was cool to have NZ in a book as well.
I thought the most interesting person on this book was U...more
A good quote is "I am not Esther" which is "Kirby's" catchphrase.Kirby is the main character and she remains strong through out the book insisting she is not Esther which is what the cult are trying to tell her.
Something i learned from this book is that even a cult can be set up in NZ and i thought that it was cool to have NZ in a book as well.
I thought the most interesting person on this book was U...more
I really related to Kirby, and to see-what basically had the feel of a cultish convent- what was going on from the person experiencing it. Her struggle between resisting and complying, between fighting and trying to salvage some happiness by just giving in. I felt like the emotions were conveyed well and we really got a sense of how difficult it can be to control who you are when you're being forced into a different world entirely from the one you know. Also the betrayal by her mother and the ki...more
Aimd at younger readers, this is a powerful book on the subject of closed religion and entrappment within them. Also how identity can be tampered with within a confined and claustraphobic atmosphere. Bale obviously has strong insights into this subject, as she later also wrote "Sins of the father", which dels with the real life story of escaping from a religious cult within New Zealand.
For anyone who has fears for friends or family being romanced or entrapped in these tight religious cults, bot...more
For anyone who has fears for friends or family being romanced or entrapped in these tight religious cults, bot...more
I had to read this book when i was about 12/13 for English. At first i sorta loathed until one day I learnt that one of my school teachers had become a part of such a cult and had to run away with her mum. She was hated and she didn't have contact with her family.
I actually loved this book and apparently I can't get it any more. I read it like twice in about 18 months. Sorta obsessive, but every time I read it I discovered something new and exciting... to the point where even today I still have...more
I actually loved this book and apparently I can't get it any more. I read it like twice in about 18 months. Sorta obsessive, but every time I read it I discovered something new and exciting... to the point where even today I still have...more
I haven't read this for a few years but I remember reading it back in 2006, and before that back in high school.
This book intrigued me, the fact that a) its based in new zealand and b) that I is based around a cult type setting, a very strict religious world that was to be honest different to anything I'd known until that point.
The society of the group, the way the characters interact and the events of the story were well put together and the language is easy to read and understand. A great YA r...more
This book intrigued me, the fact that a) its based in new zealand and b) that I is based around a cult type setting, a very strict religious world that was to be honest different to anything I'd known until that point.
The society of the group, the way the characters interact and the events of the story were well put together and the language is easy to read and understand. A great YA r...more
'I am not Esther' is another young adult novel that does a great job of adressing mature themes in an age appropriate manner. The story deals with cult membership, parent abandonment, fitting in, and sexual coersion.
I think this would make a good teen book club group because of the many discussions about fitting in that this book adresses.
Discussion questions:
Should Kirby be more respectful of her new family's way of life? Why or why not?
What did Kirby do that you agree with? Disagree with?
What...more
I think this would make a good teen book club group because of the many discussions about fitting in that this book adresses.
Discussion questions:
Should Kirby be more respectful of her new family's way of life? Why or why not?
What did Kirby do that you agree with? Disagree with?
What...more
My full I Am Not Esther review can be found at Agrippina Legit.
I'm a sucker for anything that deals with life in religious cults, whether the account be fictional or real. So, when I found this book in my partner's bookshelves, I knew it was only a matter of time before I devoured it!
In some ways, I Am Not Esther satisfied my expectations. It is impossible not to sympathise with Kirby, so infuriating is the situation that she's placed in. The demands that are made of her by her uncle would seem...more
I'm a sucker for anything that deals with life in religious cults, whether the account be fictional or real. So, when I found this book in my partner's bookshelves, I knew it was only a matter of time before I devoured it!
In some ways, I Am Not Esther satisfied my expectations. It is impossible not to sympathise with Kirby, so infuriating is the situation that she's placed in. The demands that are made of her by her uncle would seem...more
I found myself so mad at the things going on around the character at times I wanted to throw things, I was so sucked in to this novel. Just a fantastic example of how YA is supposed to work. I think that the only criticism some could level is that it isn't a balanced or nice view of religious zealotry, and I would agree...but I have to admit my own subject position by saying I don't know that I particularly care if that view is represented fairly or not. I devoured it in one sitting, and I have...more
This was such an emotionally charged read. Kirby is a girl that I feel strongly connected to for many reasons, but let's begin at the beginning. She lives with her mother, Ellen, who is a nurse but despite her position at a hospital she is very irresponsible and Kirby has to take care of the "adult" things around the house such as paying bills, grocery shopping, and cleaning. It has just always been that and Ellen's love seems to make up for it in Kirby's opinion. However, Ellen is very child-li...more
When her mother suddenly decides to volunteer at a refugee camp in Africa, 12-year-old Kirby is sent to live with relatives she never knew existed. Her uncle, aunt, and cousins belong to a religious community called Children of the Faith; they live an extremely conservative lifestyle based on the bible and eschew most outside influence. They drive cars, but have no phone or television, and dress modestly and with muted colors. They don't own any mirrors. Kirby's mother left the community at 16 a...more
EXTRA - CREDIT
I Am Not Esther is about a teenager who is thrusted into a hisitic family. Her mother is unstable and needs guidance, she is sent to the hospital but tells Esther that she is doing beneficial work in Africa. Esther must endure the religion which her mother once ran away from. In the care of Isaac, her uncle, she must follow the rules of his household. Certain things are not to be mentioned, and religion must be preserved and most of all, God must be worshiped.
While reading through...more
I Am Not Esther is about a teenager who is thrusted into a hisitic family. Her mother is unstable and needs guidance, she is sent to the hospital but tells Esther that she is doing beneficial work in Africa. Esther must endure the religion which her mother once ran away from. In the care of Isaac, her uncle, she must follow the rules of his household. Certain things are not to be mentioned, and religion must be preserved and most of all, God must be worshiped.
While reading through...more
Hauntingly real, almost terrifyingly so, I Am Not Esther tells the tale of a girl snatched from a life she knew and loved, and tossed into the turmoil of a religious cult. The beliefs of the people are thrust upon her, and she is forced into a life with no choices, no individuality, and no freedom.
I Am Not Esther is beautifully written, and I would recommend it anyone I know. I was hooked within the first page, and unable to put it down until I finished. The story of Kirby is one that is unforg...more
I Am Not Esther is beautifully written, and I would recommend it anyone I know. I was hooked within the first page, and unable to put it down until I finished. The story of Kirby is one that is unforg...more
I Am Not Esther is a heartstopping story of religion and unfairness. Kirby wishes she knew more about her Mother’s past, but her Mother never tells her anything. When she gets a letter to work in Africa, she drops Kirby off at her Uncle’s. They are a strict religious cult and suddenly Kirby’s life is filled with unfair rules and punishments. When Kirby wants to hear about her Mother, she discovers a shocking secret about her past. Can she and her Mother ever move on from this?
This book was disturbing in some aspects. It is based off a girl who is forced to live with her mother's brother, a polygamist. She is forced to forget about her worldly upbringing and is forced to follow the rules of the polygamist faith and beliefs. It is a book that disturbs you because it is known to happen. It really opens up your mind to the potential problems others face. We read about it in a book but others actually live it and that's disturbing.
Probably not the 'gripping psychological thriller' it's billed as on the back of the book, but certainly a page turner.
As an adult reading a young adults book, I found it a fascinating read......perhaps not as detailed as it could have been, but that makes it an easy read, able to be finished in several hours.
Being easy does not make it any the less compelling - I'd recommend this to any teenager, or to a time poor adult who still wants a meaningful story.
As an adult reading a young adults book, I found it a fascinating read......perhaps not as detailed as it could have been, but that makes it an easy read, able to be finished in several hours.
Being easy does not make it any the less compelling - I'd recommend this to any teenager, or to a time poor adult who still wants a meaningful story.
This book was really interesting! It was only a short read so it didn't drag on, and it contained so much detail into the lives of those living in a cult. I didn't particularly like the writing style as i found the story moved too quickly, for example, in one sentence it would be describing events from one day, and then after, the event (still in present tense) from a few days later. Regardless i still found this book an enjoyable and fascinating read and i certainly recommend you take a look!
This book was great! Its about a girl whos mom runs away and leaves her with Religious freaks. If you dont do what they say they get on their knees for an hour! And they will pray for you or beat you. I read the first few pages and they seemed boring but i kept reading and when i got to page 10... i couldnt stop. I could never put the book down i read for one whole day it was so good.
A brilliant young adult novel about a 14 year old girl being put into a fundamentalist Christian society.
The novel touches on lots of conflicting emotions as Kirby (renamed Esther - it's biblical, as is their way) struggles with thoughts of leaving the group, even though she knows she will be ostracised and must leave a family she has come to love.
I am very happy that I read it, and I feel that I learned something from it.
The novel touches on lots of conflicting emotions as Kirby (renamed Esther - it's biblical, as is their way) struggles with thoughts of leaving the group, even though she knows she will be ostracised and must leave a family she has come to love.
I am very happy that I read it, and I feel that I learned something from it.
Aug 18, 2010
Kimathy
rated it
4 of 5 stars
Recommends it for:
Fans of Phycological thrillers
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favorite-books
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
Kirby has always been the organized one and taken care of herself and her mother. Suddenly, her mom leaves her with her uncle to go to Africa. Kirby is given a new name, Esther, and forced to live in a fanatical Christian cult with repressive rules. She struggles to maintain her identity and to find out where her mother is before it is too late.
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Fleur Beale (née Corney) (born February 22, 1945) is a New Zealand teenage fiction writer, best known for her novel I am not Esther, which has been published worldwide.
Beale was one of six children of a dairy farmer Cedric Corney and of a teacher and author Estelle Corney (née Cook). She was born in Inglewood, Taranaki, New Zealand, on the farm where her father was born. Beale grew up in the town...more
More about Fleur Beale...
Beale was one of six children of a dairy farmer Cedric Corney and of a teacher and author Estelle Corney (née Cook). She was born in Inglewood, Taranaki, New Zealand, on the farm where her father was born. Beale grew up in the town...more
