Goodreads Blog

Hiring at Goodreads: New Opening for Hyperintelligent Pandimensional Mice

Posted by Jessica on April 01, 2012 603238

Goodreads is hiring for the following positions. Click to read more and apply on our jobs page:

Today, we'd like to spotlight our newest open position:
Hyperintelligent Pandimensional Mice

Goodreads, a US Top 150 site and the 10th largest social networking site in the galaxy, is seeking Hyperintelligent Pandimensional Mice to take charge of the Goodreads Recommendation Engine, the third greatest supercomputer in the Universe of Space and Time designed to answer the Ultimate Question of What People Like to Read Next. Qualified mice should be comfortable analyzing the mind-boggling 20 billion data points of reader likes and dislikes recorded in the Goodreads catalog to calculate the staggering improbability of reader interest in any given book.

Note: We will also consider qualified dolphins for this position.

Required Skills:

  • Proficient with SEP fields, bistromath, and complex functions involving telephone numbers.
  • Knowledge of the Great Hyperlobic Omni-Cognate Neutron Wrangler operating system.
  • Ability to predict personality problems to ten decimal places.
  • Quick learner, must be able to pick up frighteningly elegant new technologies quickly.
  • Experience with protrusion into other reading dimensions a plus.
  • Must carry own towel.

We Prefer Applicants Who:

  • Are not prone to panicking.
  • Come equipped with own Babel fish.
  • If cybernetic, come loaded with pleasant GPP.
  • Know better than to muck about in hyperspace.

About Goodreads:

  • Our environment is highly supportive, friendly, and mostly harmless.
  • We are the galaxy's largest site for readers, froods, and book recommendations.
  • Our mission is to help people find and share books they love. Along the way, we plan to improve the process of reading and learning throughout the galaxy.
  • Great location: Our office in downtown San Francisco, catty-corner from the Restaurant at the End of the Universe, is always stocked with cheese and an infinite supply of ballpoint pens.
  • Our office culture includes a Brockian Ultra Cricket league, frequent trips to Disaster Area concerts, and regular Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster happy hours.

Please submit your résumé. You can also submit the following additional information now, or if you would prefer, later in our interview process: A code sample and a paragraph or two about why you want to work for Goodreads. For a limited time, we are offering state-of-the-art digital watches as a signing bonus. Don't wait, come sass us today!

Update: As of April 2, 2012, the position has been filled. Thank you.
View our current open positions »


Comments (showing 1-50 of 180) (180 new)


message 1: by Syahira (new)

Syahira Sharif overwhelming....... *brain freeze*


message 2: by Lord Nouda (new)

Lord Nouda Lol, waaaay too over the top imho. Google's was much nicer, even though it was really obvious, the simplicity of it made it that much more awesome.


message 3: by Tariqul (new)

Tariqul Ponir Hahaha.... Hitchhikers are coming... *_*


message 4: by Moira (new)

Moira My brain just exploded. :S


message 5: by AennA (new)

AennA If I had not read THGTTG I would find this whole announcement weird! :))


message 6: by Jennifer (new)

Jennifer Awesome! Now what are you going to do for Towel Day?


message 7: by Sarah (new)

Sarah Mcmullan I love April Fools!


message 8: by Sharon (new)

Sharon  Sawtell Very good April fools


message 9: by Vinola (new)

Vinola good one, goodreads!!


message 10: by Abby (new)

Abby Will pass on to the mice in my network. Thanks!


message 11: by Jillian (new)

Jillian Byrd "OK, so ten out of ten for style, but minus several million for good thinking, yeah? " ;-)


message 12: by Kat Kennedy (new)

Kat Kennedy Love it!


message 13: by Hayes (last edited Apr 01, 2012 02:20AM) (new)

Hayes In Italian it's called a pesce d'aprile, an April fish. Well done!




message 14: by Pauline (new)

Pauline Tilbe Can I substitute Swedish Fish instead of Babel fish?


message 15: by Manny (new)

Manny Dear Jessica,

You unaccountably failed to reply last time I sent you a job application. I shall pretend it was an administrative error and give you a second chance.

Jessica, all I can say is that I would be perfect for this position. I am the only living person to have published a collection of Goodreads reviews (all the others have been terminated with extreme prejudice by my teams of highly-trained ninja assassins). I have also published two books on software engineering. Last, but definitely not least, I am a hyperintelligent pandimensional mouse.

I expect you to hire me on the spot, but, should you need to placate your superiors by going through the motions of doing a background check, I am prepared to forward you my resume.

I look forward to spending lazy afternoons at the Goodreads offices, pretending to work while I goof off and post reviews. I hope the rumors are true that claim employees are entitled to extra free votes.

Your future colleague,

Manny


message 16: by Sofia (new)

Sofia Grey Love April Fools - nice one GR :-)


Abdul-rahman Salem April fool :/


message 18: by Jason (new)

Jason Lundberg Nice. :)


message 19: by Army of Penguins (new)

Army of Penguins "Required Skills: Must carry own towel."
Great. It's always the little details that disqualify me. >_>


message 20: by Aditya (new)

Aditya Mandalemula Jane wrote: "Love April Fools - nice one GR :-)"

Ha ha. May be it is an April Fool thing. If not, a funny coincidence.


message 21: by Sharon (new)

Sharon Kaur LOL.


message 22: by Lynsey (new)

Lynsey   • The Demon Librarian You little tinkers;)


Dhriti(Annabeth)(Ginny) Chase i actually took it seriously at first...happy april fools day to one and all..


message 24: by Lynsey (new)

Lynsey   • The Demon Librarian Dhriti wrote: "i actually took it seriously at first...happy april fools day to one and all.."

Me too. I actually just thought they had a really cool refreshing approach to hiring. Shame, really.


message 25: by Celine (new)

Celine Hahaha I love it :D


Dhriti(Annabeth)(Ginny) Chase yeah...it would be nice to tell my best friend that goodreads hired me.she would turn green with envy.


message 27: by Karina (new)

Karina Kantas lol


message 28: by Barbora (new)

Barbora ROFL, you almost got me. BTW just reading Don't panic by Neil Gaiman so this joke really made my day. :D


message 29: by Ain (new)

Ain Sunaim haha..
I thought I'm stupid for not knowing that there's such OS called Great Hyperlobic Omni-Cognate Neutron Wrangler.

Nice one.. Happy Trolling Day~!


message 30: by Nicolle (new)

Nicolle HAhahaha....very clever Goodreads!


message 31: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Well isn't that clever. Only April 1st's almost over here lol.


message 32: by Joel (new)

Joel Mr Adams will be submitting his resume posthaste!


Claudia the Night Owl now submitting resume...


message 34: by Manny (last edited Apr 01, 2012 05:17AM) (new)

Manny Claudia wrote: "now submitting resume..."

So you're applying too, Claudia? Are you also a mouse? I don't want to be rude, but your avatar makes you look rather like a cat...


message 35: by Anita (new)

Anita Truong Always stocked with cheese and an infinite supply of ballpoint pens? I am so on board!


message 36: by Cynthia (new)

Cynthia Man, first the cats take over, now the mice. What is the world coming to?


message 37: by Wendy (new)

Wendy Lohr That's got to be the greatest job listing ever!!! I've got my towel! lol


message 38: by nomad (new)

nomad whats happening? Mice overcame the human race.


message 39: by Courtney (new)

Courtney Williams I applied! With a degree in maths and another in astrophysics it was either that or back to the dole queue on Monday :)


message 40: by Oceana Fern (new)

Oceana Fern April Fools?


message 41: by [deleted user] (new)

love it GR!!


message 42: by Chanelle (new)

Chanelle Goodreads got all of us who read this good.


Bookie | The BookChick Bwahahahaha. Hilarious. Just hilarious.


message 44: by Katherine (new)

Katherine Yeh love this!


message 45: by Traveller (last edited Apr 01, 2012 07:13AM) (new)

Traveller Heheheheh I just love April 1...

Would Supraintelligent ultraomniscient gerbils also come into consideration? Especially ones who know how to navigate around cyber black holes when engaging the grey ravages of cyberspace?


message 46: by Kelly (new)

Kelly I totally forgot it was April Fools day! Nice one!


message 47: by Stéphanie (new)

Stéphanie Hayes wrote: "In Italian it's called a pesce d'aprile, an April fish. Well done!

"


Ha, good to know. In french we say "poisson d'avril," so translated it's something like April's Fish too!


message 48: by Sage (new)

Sage Collins I'm totally qualified!


message 49: by C.S. (new)

C.S. Einfeld :(

Nothing for hyPOintelligent, uni-dimensional rats? :(


message 50: by Jackie (new)

Jackie No Babel fish, but I have the Costco size box of XTRA CHEDDAR GOLDFISH in the pantry. Will that do??


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