Absolutely no one at all has asked me who would win in a fight between Taro, the vampire ninja hero of BLOOD NINJA, and Edward, from those obscure, hard-to-find books by Stephenie Meyer.

Which is a shame, because I could answer them very simply: Taro would win. Why? Dude is a NINJA. As we all know, thanks to the mine of valuable information that is the internet, a ninja can whale on anyone's *ss. Even a pirate's. And yes, even Edward's. ESPECIALLY Edward's. Even if Taro wasn't a vampire, he'd win. Has Edward got throwing stars? No.

But of course, as BLOOD NINJA teaches us, all ninjas are actually vampires - that's why they sneak around at night, and why they're so super stealthy, silent, and deadly. So since Taro is a ninja AND a vampire, he would DOUBLE kill Edward. He would kill him, and then kill him again just for the hell of it.

Let's review the scenarios:

1) Taro is asked to assassinate Edward. In this scenario, there isn't even a fight. Taro finds where Edward is sleeping, scales the wall, breaks in through the window and decapitates him before you can even say, "Jasper, come quick."

2) Taro and Edward fight in daylight. Edward is all, like, "Look at me, I'm sparkling." And Taro is like, "Look at my sword. It's sticking out of your heart. And you didn't even see me move."

3) Taro and Edward fight in the dark. Seriously, this one doesn't even get off the ground. Edward doesn't see Taro coming. The end.

Full disclaimer: I actually like Edward and am not ashamed, as a full-grown man, to say I like Twilight too. Actually I'm one of the few people who snagged a copy of the first edition UK hardback, way back in the day - so I've been Team Edward since day one, Twihards. It's just that Taro would totally slaughter him, I'm afraid.

Full disclaimer part two: no, it's not for sale.


Get more on Nick Lake at SimonandSchuster.com
5 likes · Like  •  7 comments  •  flag
Published on December 04, 2009 00:00 • 759 views
Comments (showing 1-7 of 7) (7 new)    post a comment »
dateDown arrow    newest »

message 1: by Alaecia (last edited Jan 20, 2010 10:04AM) (new)

Alaecia NO, of course I Love BLOOD NINJA but NO Edward would win. Edwards skin is harder than rock so that Sword of Taros would break in half plus Edward doesnt sleep so ha! I like Taro better than Edward ANYDAY but of course Edward would win. Sorry Nick...


message 2: by [deleted user] (new)

ha. that is so incredibly awesome.
you are so right.

darn, it's not for sale? if it were, i would definitely buy it, lulz.

...
ja.


twinArmageddons Nick has got to be outta his mind if he is not going to publish Blood Ninja 2. I will wait centries if I have to. I will get and read that book if it is one of the last things I will do. P.S. Blood Ninja is my favorite book I have read ever right now. So that book must be published!


message 4: by [deleted user] (new)

Alex wrote: "Nick has got to be outta his mind if he is not going to publish Blood Ninja 2. I will wait centries if I have to. I will get and read that book if it is one of the last things I will do. P.S. Blood..."

Ugh! I can't wait! But I don't get why we Blood Ninja fans have to wait till December! DECEMBER!! >_<
I really really really really wanna read it now! I might even hyperventilate in the shower!


message 5: by Jessica (new)

Jessica I completely agree that Taro would kick Edward's butt. Jacob is better anyway. XP


message 6: by BOOK BUTTERFLY (new)

BOOK BUTTERFLY I agree- Taro would kick Edward's butt no problem! Nick- I love this book and was wondering if you'd want to coordinate an interview for my book blog? Let me know! :)


message 7: by Nandanie (new)

Nandanie I was wondering if there was a book 3 to this. I absoluletly loved the second book and it would be a shame to end the series so quick!


back to top