Jake Wizner

Jake Wizner



I was supposed to be born on Hitler’s birthday. To my mother’s great relief, I arrived late and was born on Freud’s birthday instead. My parents wanted to name me Max, but my grandfather, a Holocaust refugee, strenuously objected, saying the name sounded too German. My original birth certificate read Baby Boy Wizner.

My mother was a college dean, and I spent the first ten years of my life living in a dormitory. I ate meals in the college dining hall, explored the campus tunnels, and became a foosball prodigy, sharpening my skills against opponents more than twice my age. Occasionally, I would sleepwalk around the dormitory at night, and be picked up by drunk students returning from parties in the early morning hours.

I went to Wesleyan Univer

Average rating: 3.80 · 3,522 ratings · 681 reviews · 5 distinct works · Similar authors
Spanking Shakespeare

3.84 avg rating — 3,128 ratings — published 2007 — 13 editions
Rate this book
Clear rating
Castration Celebration

3.46 avg rating — 382 ratings — published 2009 — 8 editions
Rate this book
Clear rating
Worth Writing About

4.50 avg rating — 8 ratings — published 2015
Rate this book
Clear rating
Worth Writing About Explori...

4.25 avg rating — 4 ratings — published 2015
Rate this book
Clear rating
Worth Writing About: Explor...

0.00 avg rating — 0 ratings — published 2015
Rate this book
Clear rating
More books by Jake Wizner…

Upcoming Events

No scheduled events. Add an event.

“There once was a man who was sore
'Cuz his wife wouldn't open the door.
is just not for me
Let me in, you cock-teasing whore.”
Jake Wizner, Spanking Shakespeare

“I wrote you this poem because i was afraid/ To come out and tell you i want to get laid.”
Jake Wizner



Topics Mentioning This Author

topics posts views last activity  
Wild Things: YA G...: Books Coming Up Soon - Anyone Read? 47 70 Sep 14, 2010 09:19AM  
Wild Things: YA G...: November group read winners! 35 113 Oct 27, 2011 08:51AM  
Crazy Challenge C...: 3rd Quarter Scavenger Hunt - VACATION TIME! 243 172 Jan 11, 2013 03:09PM  
Crazy Challenge C...: Summer Olympics 2012 371 250 Apr 23, 2013 10:21PM  

Is this you? Let us know. If not, help out and invite Jake to Goodreads.