Bradley Sands

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Bradley Sands

Goodreads Author

in The United States
December 28




Member Since
December 2007


Bradley Sands is an author of bizarro fiction. He wrote Dodgeball High, Sorry I Ruined Your Orgy, Rico Slade Will F*cking Kill You, and other books.

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Popular Answered Questions

Bradley Sands Take a shower. Seriously. The ideas come flowing out of me and I get unblocked 90% of the time. Going for a walk also works sometimes, but not as…moreTake a shower. Seriously. The ideas come flowing out of me and I get unblocked 90% of the time. Going for a walk also works sometimes, but not as well. It's also easier for me to deal with writer's block while I'm working on an outline rather than when I'm writing the book itself. And if I'm working off an outline, I rarely get blocked when I'm writing the book.(less)
Bradley Sands Every new book is an improvement over what I wrote before it (although my books weren't all published in the order in which they were written). I'm…moreEvery new book is an improvement over what I wrote before it (although my books weren't all published in the order in which they were written). I'm proud of all my books, but it's difficult for me to read my older work without cringing. I'm sure I would enjoy it immensely if it were written by someone else, but it makes me uncomfortable because I'm so much better now.(less)
Average rating: 4.04 · 1,432 ratings · 298 reviews · 43 distinct works · Similar authors
Sorry I Ruined Your Orgy

3.58 avg rating — 159 ratings — published 2010 — 4 editions
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It Came from Below the Belt

3.84 avg rating — 61 ratings — published 2006
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Dodgeball High

4.06 avg rating — 51 ratings — published 2014 — 2 editions
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TV Snorted My Brain

4.04 avg rating — 45 ratings — published 2012 — 3 editions
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Please Do Not Shoot Me in t...

4.07 avg rating — 43 ratings — published 2011 — 2 editions
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Bust Down the Door and Eat ...

4.49 avg rating — 39 ratings — published 2007 — 2 editions
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Bust Down The Door and Eat ...

4.19 avg rating — 42 ratings — published 2008 — 2 editions
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Bust Down the Door and Eat ...

4.18 avg rating — 33 ratings — published 2010
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My Heart Said No, But the C...

3.97 avg rating — 29 ratings — published 2010 — 2 editions
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Rico Slade Will Fucking Kil...

3.69 avg rating — 404 ratings — published 2011 — 2 editions
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More books by Bradley Sands…


No other game has had such an impact upon my childhood development and made such an impression on the person who I am today than the original King’s Quest. It’s also possible that it’s the most influential piece of media that I have ever experienced in my lifetime, but that would be a difficult fact to determine.

The year was 1984 and I was six years old. I was over my friend Evan’s house, who...

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Published on January 18, 2016 20:21 • 30 views

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The Mustache Growing Competition (Literature & Fiction)
1 chapters   —   updated May 13, 2015 06:38PM
Description: Burt Reynolds is auctioning off his mustache and hundreds of other items from his film career. To celebrate this monumental event, I’m posting a chapter that was cut from my newest novel, [book: Dodgeball High]. It concerns a mustache growing competition between The Bandit himself and Justin Lucas, who is the book’s protagonist.

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More of Bradley's books…
“Sometimes the good guy rips out innocent people's throats. That's just something the world need to live with if it wants the good guy to keep saving the day.”
Bradley Sands, Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill You

“That's just how time travel looks like to the untrained eye. The reason why there aren't more travelers is that your average physicist refuses to be eaten by a giraffe in the name of science.”
Bradley Sands, It Came from Below the Belt

“I will fucking kill you and anyone else who gets in the way of me and my tunes.”
Bradley Sands, Rico Slade Will Fucking Kill You
tags: music

Topics Mentioning This Author

topics posts views last activity  
THE JAMES MASON C...: May 2011 book club pick! Stranger Will, a noir story of apathy and abortion 1 9 Mar 20, 2011 07:36AM  
The Seasonal Read...: Winter Challenge 2011: Reading Plans 45 307 Jan 17, 2012 08:52PM  
Reading with Style: Author Chains 49 104 Aug 02, 2014 03:03PM  
Bizarro Fiction: BRADLEY SANDS: 'Dodgeball High' 14 42 Apr 12, 2015 02:08PM  
Fun & Games: Author Alphabet 885 231 41 minutes ago  
“When people dis fantasy—mainstream readers and SF readers alike—they are almost always talking about one sub-genre of fantastic literature. They are talking about Tolkien, and Tolkien's innumerable heirs. Call it 'epic', or 'high', or 'genre' fantasy, this is what fantasy has come to mean. Which is misleading as well as unfortunate.

Tolkien is the wen on the arse of fantasy literature. His oeuvre is massive and contagious—you can't ignore it, so don't even try. The best you can do is consciously try to lance the boil. And there's a lot to dislike—his cod-Wagnerian pomposity, his boys-own-adventure glorying in war, his small-minded and reactionary love for hierarchical status-quos, his belief in absolute morality that blurs moral and political complexity. Tolkien's clichés—elves 'n' dwarfs 'n' magic rings—have spread like viruses. He wrote that the function of fantasy was 'consolation', thereby making it an article of policy that a fantasy writer should mollycoddle the reader.

That is a revolting idea, and one, thankfully, that plenty of fantasists have ignored. From the Surrealists through the pulps—via Mervyn Peake and Mikhael Bulgakov and Stefan Grabiński and Bruno Schulz and Michael Moorcock and M. John Harrison and I could go on—the best writers have used the fantastic aesthetic precisely to challenge, to alienate, to subvert and undermine expectations.

Of course I'm not saying that any fan of Tolkien is no friend of mine—that would cut my social circle considerably. Nor would I claim that it's impossible to write a good fantasy book with elves and dwarfs in it—Michael Swanwick's superb Iron Dragon's Daughter gives the lie to that. But given that the pleasure of fantasy is supposed to be in its limitless creativity, why not try to come up with some different themes, as well as unconventional monsters? Why not use fantasy to challenge social and aesthetic lies?

Thankfully, the alternative tradition of fantasy has never died. And it's getting stronger. Chris Wooding, Michael Swanwick, Mary Gentle, Paul di Filippo, Jeff VanderMeer, and many others, are all producing works based on fantasy's radicalism. Where traditional fantasy has been rural and bucolic, this is often urban, and frequently brutal. Characters are more than cardboard cutouts, and they're not defined by race or sex. Things are gritty and tricky, just as in real life. This is fantasy not as comfort-food, but as challenge.

The critic Gabe Chouinard has said that we're entering a new period, a renaissance in the creative radicalism of fantasy that hasn't been seen since the New Wave of the sixties and seventies, and in echo of which he has christened the Next Wave. I don't know if he's right, but I'm excited. This is a radical literature. It's the literature we most deserve.”
China Miéville

3057 Bizarro Fiction — 862 members — last activity May 27, 2016 06:09AM
This is a group devoted to lovers of bizarro fiction. Whether you write it or read it, you are welcome here. Come join us in our love of the weird and ...more
46364 The Magnificent Seven (New Bizarro Author Series 2010-11) — 271 members — last activity May 31, 2012 07:10AM
We are the second class of Eraserhead Press's New Bizarro Author Series. We're awesome.
43519 readers advisory for all — 3353 members — last activity May 27, 2016 11:26AM
life's too short to read crappy books. this is why readers' advisory exists. feel free to join if you are looking for "a book like____" or "a book tha ...more
24425 Alternative Romance — 114 members — last activity Mar 07, 2016 06:06PM
Romance as a sub-genre in more edgy catagories: horror, bizarro, noir, sub-punk, ect. The darker, but just as sweet, side of love.
6581 Q&A with Garrett Cook — 40 members — last activity May 05, 2010 09:09AM
If somebody out there is interested in asking me about Murderland part 1:H8,myself or anything of that ilk, they're welcome to come to this group and ...more
49017 Destroy this book IMMEDIATELY! — 18 members — last activity Apr 05, 2012 07:44PM
This "book" you see here is an abomination. It besmirches men like Kirk Cameron and Terry Bradshaw, men of high moral fiber, and tramples over all tha ...more
47325 PoMo and Surreal Fiction Book Club — 130 members — last activity Oct 29, 2014 10:35AM
This book club is dedicated to people who enjoy surreal and post-modern fiction and would like to explore and read a new title monthly or bi-monthly. ...more
30601 Q&A with author Jess Gulbranson — 10 members — last activity Feb 25, 2010 04:47PM
27821 Naropa Summer Writing Program — 21 members — last activity Dec 18, 2009 10:44AM
Group for the 2010 Naropa University Summer Writing Program
34682 The Velvet — 75 members — last activity Jul 26, 2015 10:13PM
The Velvet forums were originally created as a discussion forum for the works of Craig Clevenger, Will Christopher Baer, and Stephen Graham Jones but ...more
More of Bradley’s groups…

Comments (showing 1-17)    post a comment »
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message 17: by Bradley

Bradley Why is the name of one of my books now listed as one of my quotes (Sorry I Ruined Your Orgy), along with prose poem titles from that book? The "quote" with the title also lists my name, publisher, and their location. Seems kind of dumb.

message 16: by Bradley

Bradley Derek wrote: "Thank you for the add, Mr. Sands! I highly look forward to reading your body of work."

You're welcome, Derek. Nice to meet you.

message 15: by Derek

Derek Thank you for the add, Mr. Sands! I highly look forward to reading your body of work.

message 14: by Bradley

Bradley Lea wrote: "Do my eyes deceive me? Is Bradley Sands finally back? Thank god -- Rico Slade is cool and all, but I'd rather hang out with you."

Yes, I have regained control of my profile with the assistance of explosives.

message 13: by Lea

Lea Do my eyes deceive me? Is Bradley Sands finally back? Thank god -- Rico Slade is cool and all, but I'd rather hang out with you.

message 12: by Minerva

Minerva No.

Please don't kill me.

message 11: by Colin

Colin McKay Miller Hey, I'm a huge Dean Koontz fan and your book is being given away for free. If I win, it'll be cool to tear the pages from your books for use as bookmarks for his next bajillion Brother Odd novels. It's an honor really.

Elizabeth Thank you for adding me and a Belated Happy new Year to ya ......Peace

message 9: by Ruth

Ruth Khanna Thanks for adding me to your friends list!

Bert  Santibanez Hey Bradley, would you consider yourself a man of good artistic taste? If so, I'm definately looking through your reads. By the way, I hope your new project is going well. Sometime ago, I read on your blog, you were furiously working on it. When it comes out, I'm definately purchasing a copy, truely.

Jessica well if you have any florky stories, pls tell me! I haven't been on there's definitely an awkward site, it's kind of charming in its primitive backwardness, but I'm hardly a long-timer there..

message 6: by Saleh

Saleh Hi.What We Talk About When We Talk About Love?PLZ Answer The Question In My Profile.

message 5: by Bill

Bill Glover Thank you for the friend invitation. I dug the "It Came From Below the Belt" excerpt. It's on my to-read list.

Bert  Santibanez Hey Bradley, thanks for thanking people. Regardless, i'm glad i found the site. I've been reading Raymond Carver, too. I'm nearly done with "What we talk about when we talk about love." i notice you're reading "Where I'm Coming From." Yeah, my technologically advanced computer will automatically inform me on your review when it comes. its wonderous thing. peace, Bradley.

Jordan The question is.. are YOU watching the Karate Kid Part III?

Jeremy I want to apologize for the all the recommendations from me today. I wanted to share the Stoker Award news, and I only pressed the send button once--I'm not sure what happened.

Argh...this is terrible...

Again, I'm very sorry.


Jeremy Hi Bradley!

Here’s wishing you a nifty New Year filled with noiseless noses, neato nicknames, noble Nebraskans, gnarly narcoleptic nebulas, and novel novels about nut-eating narwhals and novercaphobic gnats.

-Jeremy :)

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