Cara Lynn Shultz's Blog

July 7, 2015



Me when I try to reach my word count goals for the day.

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Published on July 07, 2015 16:00 • 7 views

There is a MAJOR problem with the movie Independence Day.

And I’m not going to talk about the whole virus-uploading thing. I’m going to talk about RANDY QUAID (forever referred to as Randy Quaid and not by his character’s name, because if I said, “Let’s talk about Russell Casse,” you’d ask, “Who?” and I’d say, “Randy Quaid”).

I’m going to talk about how everyone treats him like a crazy person because he says he was abducted by aliens.

During an alien invasion.

Where we are expected to believe aliens are real and invading.

I get it, he’s a drunk mess, he gets fired a lot, and he has the whole “loose cannon” vibe going on. He’s probably Charlie from It’s Always Sunny’s dad or long-lost uncle.

But come on. Aliens are invading. Is it that much of a reach? The guy saves the world, after all. 


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Published on July 07, 2015 13:56 • 3 views

July 4, 2015



The record number of hot dogs eaten at the Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest. Also? LOLOLOLOLOLOL

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Published on July 04, 2015 07:20 • 1 view

June 29, 2015

We made it.

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Published on June 29, 2015 17:39 • 8 views

June 26, 2015

I absolutely love being married.

Dave and I didn’t have a traditional wedding, but we still had a wedding. No one questioned our right to stand up in front of our friends and family and make a promise and a commitment to each other. Here’s the thing about marriage: It changes the dynamic of a relationship. It makes it stronger. It makes it more profound. 

And anyone who wants to deny that right — yes, it’s a RIGHT — to two people who are in love are in the wrong. I’m so, so happy that marriage for ALL is now legal. 


And on another note … I wonder how many dudes who told their girlfriends “Oh, I’ll marry you when it’s legal for everyone” are now crapping their pants.

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Published on June 26, 2015 10:30 • 3 views

June 24, 2015



I have never related to a cartoon as much as I relate to this one.

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Published on June 24, 2015 17:00 • 1 view

June 4, 2015



I googled “super awesome cat.” I’m not disappointed. 

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Published on June 04, 2015 16:00 • 10 views

June 2, 2015



Sometimes you just want a kitten gif. This one comes with extra derp.

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Published on June 02, 2015 16:00 • 9 views

May 31, 2015



Rain doesn’t suck when this is your umbrella. #allcateverything

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Published on May 31, 2015 11:03 • 5 views

May 29, 2015