Jarod Kintz

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Jarod Kintz

Goodreads Author


url

born
in Salt Lake City, The United States
March 05, 1982

gender
male

website

twitter username

genre

influences
Monty Python
Jack Handey
Ted Nancy
Steve Martin
Gary Larson
Mark Twain
Oscar...more

member since
April 2011


About this author

This is it, this is my biography. The story of Jarod Kintz begins now.

Let’s knock out the trivial first. I was born in Salt Lake City on March 5th. Now that you know my birthday, please feel free to get me birthday presents. Notice how I used the plural, presents? More than one gift would be greatly appreciated. Appropriate gifts include gold coins, bars of silver, and large tracts of land (preferably beachfront property). Or you could just buy me a drink—soda, natural, because I don’t drink either alcohol or high fructose corn syrup.

Skipping ahead a few years, and a few hundred miles, we come to Denver, Colorado. For a few years I attended Mackintosh Academy. In the second grade, along with English, I studied French, Spanish, and Japanese...more


She had eyes like sunsets, and every time she blinked it felt like the end of the world, otherwise known as night.

— Jarod Kintz (@jarodkintz1) October 13, 2014

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Published on October 13, 2014 11:06 • 26 views
Average rating: 4.11 · 1,013 ratings · 73 reviews · 57 distinct works · Similar authors
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More books by Jarod Kintz…

Upcoming Events

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“If loving someone is putting them in a straitjacket and kicking them down a flight of stairs, then yes, I have loved a few people.”
Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

“I consider conversations with people to be mind exercises, but I don't want to pull a muscle, so I stretch a lot. That's why I'm constantly either rolling my eyes or yawning.”
Jarod Kintz, It Occurred to Me

“I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me.”
Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not for Sale

Polls

Which is the most inspirational quote?

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that is is stupid." Albert Einstein
 
  4 votes, 23.5%

"When you are scared, but do it anyway, that's brave."CoralineNeil Gaiman
 
  3 votes, 17.6%

"Push through the pain and move on with life."Tiger's QuestColleen Houck
 
  3 votes, 17.6%

"There is evil in everyone. The first step toward loving someone else is to recognize that evil in yourself, so you can forgive them." AllegiantVeronica Roth
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

"Unless someone like you cares a whole awful lot, nothing is going to get better. It's not." The LoraxDr. Seuss
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

"Wounds turn into scars and scars make you tough." Aisha Tyler
 
  2 votes, 11.8%

"Be true to yourself. But that's something everyone says and no one means. No one wants you to be yourself. They want you to be the version of yourself that they like." The Young ElitesMarie Lu
 
  1 vote, 5.9%

"I want to be the kind of person that kind people like and want to be like." Jarod Kintz
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

"Regrets are only felt by those who do not understand life's purpose." Tiger's VoyageColleen Houck
 
  0 votes, 0.0%

comments and details
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Topics Mentioning This Author

topics posts views last activity  
Goodreads Librari...: Policy on Authors adding their own quotes? 112 592 Feb 10, 2014 12:35AM  
A Little Bit of E...: Quote of the Day(ish) 448 167 Oct 08, 2014 10:28AM  
Chicks On Lit: what are you reading. 11051 7147 3 hours, 11 min ago  
“If our Founding Fathers wanted us to care about the rest of the world, they wouldn't have declared their independence from it.”
Stephen Colbert

“When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”
Mark Twain

“I have left orders to be awakened at any time during national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting.”
Ronald Reagan

“If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be 'meetings.”
Dave Barry

“The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found.”
Calvin Trillin

55092 Absurd Humor — 173 members — last activity Sep 29, 2014 11:40PM
a group for anyone interested in creating or consuming ridiculous, surreal, quirky humor.
136768 The ULTIMATE in Networking Mavens — 68 members — last activity Oct 09, 2014 10:57PM
This group is intended to be a repository of stellar nuggets about the topic and skills of Effective Networking.
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A place where all Goodreads members can work together to improve the Goodreads book catalog. Non-librarians are welcome to join the group as well, to...more
64180 Dora J. Arod Best Quote Award — 104 members — last activity Feb 10, 2014 09:21AM
Searching for the best quotes!
64305 We ♥ World Classical Literature — 222 members — last activity Jul 26, 2013 03:47AM
Do you like any book from world classical literature or more books? Please join in this group and meet new people who love classical books. Just have...more
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30999 Romance, Historical or Otherwise — 2961 members — last activity 1 hour, 22 min ago
A group to discuss our favorite novels, be it Historical, Contemporary, Paranormal, Mystery, YA, Horror,Chick Lit, Fantasy, Regency, Erotica... etc, e...more
66854 Dare to Dream — 183 members — last activity Oct 22, 2014 08:31PM
WARNING: MAY BECOME ADDICTIVE A group of fun and sharing. This is a place where you can relax and make yourself at home. Believe, Wonder, and Experienc...more
56181 The Knights of the Round Table — 469 members — last activity Feb 25, 2013 10:46AM
This group is for book reviews and discussions. Please feel free to join.
63427 Ready to be published? — 25 members — last activity Feb 21, 2012 11:55PM
Prose by Design is a company designed to help new and aspiring authors realize their dream of becoming published. We offer full services for self-publ...more
More of Jarod’s groups…



Comments (showing 1-48)    post a comment »
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message 48: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Jayne Louise wrote: "Thanks Jarod. Blondie has told me a lot about you, so you know you come highly recommended. X"

:)


Jayne Louise Thanks Jarod. Blondie has told me a lot about you, so you know you come highly recommended. X


message 46: by Jillian

Jillian How did you know I adore being called a maven? Of any kind, really ;-) Thanks for the add into that group :-)

~J


message 45: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Green Elephant Girl ™ wrote: "Thanks for accepting my friend request :D"

You're very welcome :)


Green Elephant Girl ™ Thanks for accepting my friend request :D


message 43: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Sasha wrote: "Thank you Jarod.You are a star!:)"

haha thanks Sasha! GLad we are now friends :)


message 42: by Sasha (last edited Oct 27, 2013 02:30PM)

Sasha Thank you Jarod.You are a star!:)


message 41: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Abhishek wrote: "Thank you so much Mr Kintz for accepting my request, I have been hiding from my boss and reading you at my office when I am pretending to work."

haha I love that!


Abhishek Tewari Thank you so much Mr Kintz for accepting my request, I have been hiding from my boss and reading you at my office when I am pretending to work.


message 39: by Mylene

Mylene Orbase :DDDD


message 38: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Irin wrote: "thank you for your you quote..you absolutely have a funny bone in your body for sure...keep making everyone smile with your writing.."

Thank you so much, Irin :)


message 37: by Irin

Irin thank you for your you quote..you absolutely have a funny bone in your body for sure...keep making everyone smile with your writing..


message 36: by Asma

Asma Fedosia Hi, Jarod, Thks for the friend invitation.


message 35: by Emily

Emily Thanks for the add!!


Lótë (Iris) Thanks for the add!
Your quotes never fail to ammuse me.
I share them with my sister all the time :)
Your humour is amazing.


message 33: by Grace

Grace No problem! Thanks for the request ^-^


Libertarian Ann ditto, didn't know I had a "style" thanks!


message 31: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Christine wrote: "Do you have skype?"

Yes indeed. jarod.kintz


Christine Hatfield Do you have skype?


message 29: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Amanda Joy wrote: "Thanks for sharing that quote. I take all humor very seriously. And thanks for the listening...

(“The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, th..."


haha yes! how've you been?


Amanda Joy Farnsworth Thanks for sharing that quote. I take all humor very seriously. And thanks for the listening...

(“The only gift I have to give, is the ability to receive. If giving is a gift, and it surely is, then my gift to you is to allow you to give to me. 
”)


Christine Hatfield your welcome

do you write books?


Christine Hatfield thanks for being my friend


message 25: by Amy

Amy Hi, Jarod. Hope all is well! :)


Savannah Thank you for the friendship.


Michelle Hey Jarod, thanks for the add :)


message 22: by Graham

Graham Parke Hi, good to have you aboard ;)


message 21: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Amy wrote: "Hey, Jarod. How's it going? I just thought I'd drop by and say hello and I hope you're having a great weekend. :)"

Life is great! How are you?


message 20: by Amy

Amy Hey, Jarod. How's it going? I just thought I'd drop by and say hello and I hope you're having a great weekend. :)


FabulousRaye That's fabulous! I think I'm turning into my late, German next door neighbor. Her name was Edith and she was a crazy cat lady.


Kelly/yllektra Thanks for adding me! :)


message 17: by Ellen

Ellen Maze Hi Jared! I'm a fan just from your profile info. I put your book on my shelf to-read...
Have a great day!
Ellen


message 16: by S.J.

S.J. Davis Jared! You are hilarious! I look forward to getting to know you much better. Cheers!


message 15: by Nely

Nely Cab Jared,

Thanks for the add, and thanks for the humor to go with my lunch. Loved that interview!

-Nely Cab


message 14: by Becca

Becca Thx for your friendship request...you had it with the Colbert quote!!!


message 13: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz April wrote: "Thanks for the add. My Birthday is March 4th :oP"

yes! beautiful time of year, yes?


message 12: by April

April Thanks for the add. My Birthday is March 4th :oP


message 11: by Lenore

Lenore Thanks for the request. Your bio cracked me up!


message 10: by Susie

Susie Thanks for the friendship! :-)


Shanna Hey! Thanks for the friendship. I liked the picture quotes by the way, I giggled out loud at a few, earning me some funny looks. Just one question, are those tiger slippers? Lol


Jillian Peery Thanks for the add! Have a great day my friend!


message 7: by M.

M. Leighton Thanks for friending me, Jarod:) Sounds like we've got a lot in common. Well the important things anyway, things like Jack Handey and Monty Python:D If you feel the need to share your Deep Thoughts or "bring out your dead," drop me an e-mail. I'm always up for a laugh;)


Tiffany Capozzi Thank you for the friendship!! Tiffany


Veronica Thanks for the friendship.


message 4: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz P. J. wrote: "Thanks for the friendship!"

You're welcome, P.J. How are you?


message 3: by Jarod

Jarod Kintz Patricia wrote: "Thanks for the friendship request, Jarod. I like funny people. LOL."

You're welcome Patricia :) How are you doing today?


Patricia Puddle Thanks for the friendship request, Jarod. I like funny people. LOL.


message 1: by P.J.

P.J. Thanks for the friendship!


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