Sue Julsen's Blog - Posts Tagged "poetry"

I was nine years old when I wrote my first poem, Why Mama?

My mother had been buried earlier that day, and I had so many thoughts; so many feelings running rampant. Not knowing how to quiet the noise inside my head, I grabbed pen and paper and just started writing whatever came to mind.

I hadn't cried since I'd been told of Mama's accidental death, but that night, when I'd finished writing, one lonely tear fell onto the page. The sadness that I couldn't share with another soul had gone down in black and white, and only then did the voices inside my head become silent...


Why Mama?

Mama, why did you go away?
I wanted to be with you
I wanted to make the hurt go away.

He told me you were dead
Then one day, you were there.
You said you looked for me for six years
You said you wanted to take me home with you.
So, why did you go away?

I never had a home
Then one day you were there.
You said, "Let's go back to Texas
That is your home, you know."

I remember the red dress
I looked for holes burned through
But there were none to find.
You were so pretty Mama
Why did you go away?

— Sue Julsen



My life before Mama's death helped inspire me to write my story. In upcoming blogs I'll tell a little more about what happened in my early life that led up to the writing of my memoir.


I believe: IF I FOLLOW MY DREAMS and DON'T QUIT, I will succeed...
And I won't quit until my story is in the homes of all my readers.


NOTE: Poem is copyright protected and may not be reproduced or copied in any form or by any means - graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or information storage and retrieval systems - without written permission of the author.


http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

2 likes · Like  •  1 comment  •  flag
Published on September 24, 2011 15:30 • 99 views • Tags: death, dreams, memoir, poem, poetry, sadness, writing
(Memoir) More on Poetry

Like I told you last time, my first poem was written when I was nine years old. That was a sad time in my life—as was most of my childhood—which I'll get into more later, but I continued to write poetry for many years.

My only problem was: if I wasn't depressed I couldn't write a word! Therefore, most of what I wrote was at the lowest points in my life, and when my depression lifted, I had to give up writing poetry.

Still, I believe, without this means of escape, my life would've been much worse.

After my mother died, I didn't have anyone to talk to. No one to tell my fears to...no one to tell me it would get better...no one to tell me in time the hurt would go away.

In a crowded room I really was all alone.
These were the words that poured out of me.




ALONE

I miss the time of being alone
Alone
To dream.
Alone
To wander.
To run through fields in my mind
To scream if need be.
Sitting by the fireplace
The blaze glowing
So bright and warm.
Letting my mind escape
Floating to the clouds
Bouncing from star to star
To visit the moon if I so desire.
To sit alone
With my own special dreams.
All the special moments
Only found
In being
Alone.

—Sue Julsen




NOTE: Poem is copyright protected and may not be reproduced or copied in any form or by any means - graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or information storage and retrieval systems - without written permission of the author.


http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

2 likes · Like  •  1 comment  •  flag
Published on September 24, 2011 15:39 • 82 views • Tags: childhood, dreams, poem, poetry, sadness
My newest book, From The Heart: A Collection of Poems and Stories, is available in Kindle and also as an audiobook.

The narrator is Beth MacEwan, and she did an awesome job of bringing life to this very special book that exposes feelings never shared before now.


Follow the link below to listen to a sample of From The Heart:

http://www.audible.com/pd/ref=det_twe...

Visit my website to see all of my books and to find out what's coming out soon:
http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen
2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag
Published on November 03, 2012 17:07 • 129 views • Tags: audio, audiobook, book, dreams, family, feelings, happiness, kindle, life, poems, poetry, sadness, short-stories, spiritual

From The Heart is a book of fifteen poems, exposing feelings never shared before. It also includes stories behind what inspired each poem in this book to be written.

If you’ve read Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival and the other two books in this series, then you already know my story, and you’ll recognize several poems from that time in my life.

If you haven't read my other books yet, to learn the full story, you’ll just have to read the bitter memories trilogy.

For so many years my life was a living hell on earth, but here's one of the poems in FROM THE HEART written after I'd gone on a three-day retreat. This was when my life began to improve, but I still had a long way to go before I found true peace. Enjoy!

THE BRIDGE TO LIFE

I knew one day I would find a place
A place where all fears would fade away.
I spent my entire life trying to hide
Trying clever ways, I thought, to conceal
Afraid to let anyone see the real me.

I knew one day I would find a place
A place to build a bridge to You.
I was looking for a road or a path
A narrow road to love, to strength
A path to understanding.
I knew one day I would find a place
A place of sparkling waters.
There’s been so much missing in my life
I want to let love enter in
I no longer want to go it alone.

Did I let it just happen?
Or, did someone bring me here?
This place of peace and contentment
The place to build a bridge to You.
Never to go alone again, or, in fear.

I have found the place I looked for
The place to let my feelings free.
A place to let God enter in
With His love, His strength
His understanding.

* * *

I hope you'll get a copy of FROM THE HEART and take a short walk back in time with me. Or, get the audio version; sit back, relax, and listen as Beth MacEwan narrates.

I personally was totally blown away when I first heard Beth bringing life to my simple words, speaking with all the passion I felt during the writing.
The audiobook is truly awesome!

http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag

BOOKS THAT WOULD BE A GREAT GIFT FOR CHRISTMAS...

Excerpt from Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival:
For once, I didn't care about food or anything else. I just wanted to sleep until the pain inside went away. I felt more sadness than I ever dreamed possible in my short three years, but I didn't know that was only the beginning of much more misery—and pain. NOTE: Strong language and heart-breaking content -- not suitable for children.

Excerpt from Trophy Murders, second in the bitter memories trilogy:
Henry lowered his voice, and stated, "Olivia, I'm dealing with murders all over town and I'm not coming home to this shit. I'm only going to tell you this once. If you ever beat Sarah like that again, I'll use that damn paddle on you. Do I make myself clear?"

Excerpt from Cutter's Revenge, the last in the trilogy:
He had to come home with new prey tonight to stop the racket; the persistent hammering in his head. He had to put an end, even temporarily, to the chatter, the laughter, and the nightmares that were driving him insane.


Visit my website to learn more about these books, and also my poetry book, From The Heart.

http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

3 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag

Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival

A True Story of a little girl (me) kidnapped at 3 years old...


IMAGINE: Taken from my home, my mother, my grandparents — everything I knew and loved — now living in the backseat of the car, feeling lost, scared and alone, not knowing if I'd ever go home again...



Please visit my website to learn more about the bitter memories trilogy, and my other book, From The Heart a Collection of Poems and Stories.


http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

NOTE: This is not a cozy, feel-good book. It's a true story of extreme child abuse and the will to survive. Strong language, heart-wrenching content!

2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag
Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival
True Story of a little girl (me) kidnapped by her father...

Constantly on the road day and night, I hadn't had anything to eat since we'd left home, and that had been several days ago. I was so hungry my stomach hurt.

Daddy was still acting very strange, but he kept telling me to go back to sleep and we'd get something to eat when we got to a town.

When I awoke to find the car not moving, I sat up to look around and I saw Daddy...



Please visit my website to learn more about the bitter memories trilogy, and my poetry book, From The Heart, also based on events in my life, that includes short stories that inspired the writing of each poem. From The Heart is also available in audio. You can listen to a preview at Amazon — it is awesome!


http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

NOTE: This is not a cozy, feel-good book. It's a true story of extreme child abuse and the will to survive. Strong language, heart-wrenching content!

2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag
Published on December 06, 2012 12:21 • 115 views • Tags: child-abuse, cutters-revenge, e-book, family-saga, fear, gifts, hate, kidnapping, kindle, love, memories, poems, poetry, serial-killer, series, trilogy, trophy-murders, true-story

Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival
True Story of a little girl (me) kidnapped by her father...

The farther Daddy drove from Texas the more he began to relax. Finally seeing him smile, I decided to try and talk to him and sat up in the backseat. I needed to know if Mama was all right, and I also wanted to know when we’d go home.

He became furious the moment I asked about Mama and told me to never mention her name again. With fire in his eyes, he told me she didn’t love him, or me...

Back home - Mama was going out of her mind. She was scared that she’d never see me again, and as more and more time passed without hearing a word about me, out of grief she turned to alcohol as a means of escape…


Please visit my website to learn more about the bitter memories trilogy, and my poetry book, From The Heart, also based on events in my life, that includes short stories that inspired the writing of each poem. From The Heart is also available in audio, and you can also listen to a sample at Amazon — it is awesome!

http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

NOTE: This is not a cozy, feel-good book. It's a true story of extreme child abuse and the will to survive. Strong language, heart-wrenching content!

3 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag

Trophy Murders, the second in the bitter memories trilogy, inspired from the true story Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival, combines truth with fiction to make an action-packed crime story while delving more into my life after going to live with my mother's brother, Henry (the cop) and his heavy-handed wife, Olivia.





While Uncle Henry is dealing with murders all over town, I'm trying to deal with my opinionated Aunt Olivia...

The first day at my new school doesn't turn out as I expected it would when a fight in the main hallway lands me in the principal's office.

Furious, my aunt stomps up the steps and into the office where she sees me sitting in the corner. Instantly, her alien mouth twisted and her black monster eyes glared...




Please visit my website to learn more about the bitter memories trilogy, and my poetry book, From The Heart, also based on events in my life, that includes short stories that inspired the writing of each poem. From The Heart is available in e-book and audio. You can listen to a sample at Amazon — it is awesome!

http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

NOTE: Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival is not a cozy, feel-good book. It's a true story of extreme child abuse and the will to survive. Contains strong language and heart-wrenching content!

Trophy Murders and Cutter's Revenge the language has been tamed down, a lot.

2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag
Published on December 10, 2012 12:06 • 108 views • Tags: child-abuse, cutters-revenge, family-saga, fiction, gifts, kindle, memoir, non-fiction, poetry, serial-killer, series, trilogy, trophy-murders, true-story

Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival
True Story of a little girl (me) kidnapped by her father...


** We stopped at a restaurant so Daddy could pick up his next "score" but not finding anyone he liked, he said he'd find someone better, and younger, at our next stop. After eating, we left unnoticed.

With a strange look on his face, Daddy drove for awhile before telling me to sit up and listen to him. Moving forward on the backseat, Daddy told me he'd called home and he had bad news about Mama... **


Other books in this series:
Trophy Murders combines truth with fiction to make an action-packed crime story while delving more into my life after going to live with my mother's brother, Henry (the cop) and his heavy-handed wife, Olivia.

Cutter's Revenge, again mixing truth with fiction, continues my story after being adopted. While another serial killer, maybe more ruthless than the gang of killers in the last book, stalks Henry's little town, I'm living a dream as I write my story's ending the way I wished it could have been.


To learn more about the bitter memories trilogy, and From The Heart, my new poetry book that includes stories that inspired the writing of each poem, please visit my website.

All my books, based on or from events in my life, have received 4 and 5 star reviews, and would make a great gift for Christmas.

NOTE: Bitter Memories: A Memoir of Heartache & Survival is not a cozy, feel-good book. It's a true story of extreme child abuse and the will to survive. It contains strong language and heart-wrenching content, while Trophy Murders and Cutter's Revenge has the raw language toned down, a lot.



http://sj2448.wix.com/suejulsen

2 likes · Like  •  0 comments  •  flag