George Carlin

George Carlin

Author profile

in New York, New York, The United States
May 12, 1937

June 22, 2008




Lenny Bruce

About this author

George Denis Patrick Carlin was a Grammy-winning American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and philosopher.

Carlin was especially noted for his political and black humor and his observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven Dirty Words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a narrow 5-4 decision by the justices affirmed the government's right to regulate Carlin's act on the public airwaves.

Carlin's mid-2000s stand-up routines focused on the flaws in modern-day America. He often took on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture.

A disciple of Lenny Bruce, he placed...more

Average rating: 4.04 · 34,536 ratings · 1,445 reviews · 29 distinct works · Similar authors
Napalm & Silly Putty
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Brain Droppings
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When Will Jesus Bring the P...
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Last Words
4.04 of 5 stars 4.04 avg rating — 6,095 ratings — published 2009 — 18 editions
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3 x Carlin: An Orgy of George
4.42 of 5 stars 4.42 avg rating — 514 ratings — published 2006 — 3 editions
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More Napalm and Silly Putty
4.19 of 5 stars 4.19 avg rating — 199 ratings — published 2002 — 3 editions
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Class Clown
4.42 of 5 stars 4.42 avg rating — 142 ratings
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George Carlin Reads to You:...
3.69 of 5 stars 3.69 avg rating — 235 ratings — published 2004 — 4 editions
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The Best of Brain Droppings
4.2 of 5 stars 4.20 avg rating — 95 ratings — published 2007
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What Am I Doing in New Jersey
4.48 of 5 stars 4.48 avg rating — 71 ratings — published 2000
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More books by George Carlin…
“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
George Carlin

“Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.”
George Carlin

“Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.”
George Carlin, When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?


What is your favorite quote?

A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies, said Jojen. The man who never reads lives only one.George R.R. Martin
  59 votes, 12.7%

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.Oscar Wilde
  47 votes, 10.1%

Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?Abraham Lincoln
  38 votes, 8.2%

Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions.Winston Churchill
  31 votes, 6.7%

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water.Eleanor Roosevelt
  28 votes, 6.0%

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.George Carlin
  28 votes, 6.0%

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.Jane Austen
  26 votes, 5.6%

The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.Socrates
  25 votes, 5.4%

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. -Thomas Edison (write-in)
  24 votes, 5.2%

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.Ralph Waldo Emerson
  18 votes, 3.9%

With my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for you. I hope it’s a cold day, so you can see what you meant to me.
Jarod Kintz
  15 votes, 3.2%

“You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.” C.S. Lewis (write-in)
  14 votes, 3.0%

You don’t forget the face of the person who was your last hope.Suzanne Collins
  13 votes, 2.8%

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.Marilyn Monroe
  13 votes, 2.8%

Most of the evil in this world is done by people with good intentions.T.S. Eliot
  12 votes, 2.6%

"Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today." James Dean (write-in)
  12 votes, 2.6%

Umm,let's see...all (write-in)
  11 votes, 2.4%

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.Mark Twain
  9 votes, 1.9%

"It is our choices that show who we truly are, far more than our abilities" Albus Dumbledore (write-in)
  9 votes, 1.9%

umm, lets see...all? (write-in)
  8 votes, 1.7%

“You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.” ― Stephen King (write-in)
  4 votes, 0.9%

Non-cooperation with evil is a duty -- Mahatma Gandhi (write-in)
  3 votes, 0.6%

"Centrum Permanebit" -The Fiery Heart (write-in)
  3 votes, 0.6%

It is never too late to be what you might have been ~ George Eliot (write-in)
  3 votes, 0.6%

"We are built like the cities of Troy on our previous selves. Every night we sleep uneasily on their rubble." --Andrew Brown (write-in)
  2 votes, 0.4%

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. Oscar Wylde (write-in)
  2 votes, 0.4%

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.Bauvard
  2 votes, 0.4%

Outside of a dog a book is a man's best friend, inside of a dog, it's too dark to read-Grouho Marx (write-in)
  1 vote, 0.2%

“And leaving you (there aren't words to untangle it) Your life, fearful and immense and blossoming, so that, sometimes frustrated, and sometimes understanding, Your life is sometimes a stone in you, and then, a star.” Rainer Maria Rilke (write-in)
  1 vote, 0.2%

Any words spoken by Four (write-in)
  1 vote, 0.2%

"Chacun à son goût" (each to his own taste) -Prince Orlofsky from Die Fledermaus (write-in)
  1 vote, 0.2%

real man (write-in)
  1 vote, 0.2%

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” (write-in)
  0 votes, 0.0%


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