George Carlin





George Carlin

Author profile


born
in New York, New York, The United States
May 12, 1937

died
June 22, 2008

gender
male

website

genre

influences
Lenny Bruce


About this author

George Denis Patrick Carlin was a Grammy-winning American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and philosopher.

Carlin was especially noted for his political and black humor and his observations on language, psychology, and religion along with many taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven Dirty Words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a narrow 5-4 decision by the justices affirmed the government's right to regulate Carlin's act on the public airwaves.

Carlin's mid-2000s stand-up routines focused on the flaws in modern-day America. He often took on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture.

A disciple of Lenny Bruce, he placed...more


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Last Words
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George Carlin Reads to You:...
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More books by George Carlin…
“The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.”
George Carlin

“Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.”
George Carlin

“Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid.”
George Carlin, When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?

Polls

What is your favorite quote?

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.Oscar Wilde
 
  98 votes, 11.2%

A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies, said Jojen. The man who never reads lives only one.George R.R. Martin
 
  94 votes, 10.7%

A woman is like a tea bag; you never know how strong it is until it's in hot water.Eleanor Roosevelt
 
  69 votes, 7.9%

Diplomacy is the art of telling people to go to hell in such a way that they ask for directions.Winston Churchill
 
  52 votes, 5.9%

The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.Jane Austen
 
  49 votes, 5.6%

Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?Abraham Lincoln
 
  47 votes, 5.4%

The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.Socrates
 
  42 votes, 4.8%

For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness.Ralph Waldo Emerson
 
  38 votes, 4.3%

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music.George Carlin
 
  38 votes, 4.3%

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. -Thomas Edison (write-in)
 
  32 votes, 3.7%

With my last breath, I’ll exhale my love for you. I hope it’s a cold day, so you can see what you meant to me.
Jarod Kintz
 
  28 votes, 3.2%

If you can make a woman laugh, you can make her do anything.Marilyn Monroe
 
  27 votes, 3.1%

“You can never get a cup of tea large enough or a book long enough to suit me.” C.S. Lewis (write-in)
 
  23 votes, 2.6%

“I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together.” (write-in)
 
  20 votes, 2.3%

"Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today." James Dean (write-in)
 
  20 votes, 2.3%

Most of the evil in this world is done by people with good intentions.T.S. Eliot
 
  18 votes, 2.1%

You don’t forget the face of the person who was your last hope.Suzanne Collins
 
  17 votes, 1.9%

"It is our choices that show who we truly are, far more than our abilities" Albus Dumbledore (write-in)
 
  17 votes, 1.9%

Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.Mark Twain
 
  15 votes, 1.7%

umm, lets see...all? (write-in)
 
  14 votes, 1.6%

Umm,let's see...all (write-in)
 
  13 votes, 1.5%

“For in dreams we enter a world that is entirely our own. Let them swim in the deepest ocean or glide over the highest cloud.” ~Albus P. W. B. Dumbledore (write-in)
 
  10 votes, 1.1%

“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” ― Marilyn Monroe (write-in)
 
  10 votes, 1.1%

It is never too late to be what you might have been ~ George Eliot (write-in)
 
  7 votes, 0.8%

most of them (write-in)
 
  7 votes, 0.8%

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all. Oscar Wylde (write-in)
 
  7 votes, 0.8%

“You can't deny laughter; when it comes, it plops down in your favorite chair and stays as long as it wants.” ― Stephen King (write-in)
 
  6 votes, 0.7%

If you're going through hell, Just keep going! Winston Churchill (write-in)
 
  6 votes, 0.7%

Outside of a dog a book is a man's best friend, inside of a dog, it's too dark to read-Grouho Marx (write-in)
 
  6 votes, 0.7%

Any words spoken by Four (write-in)
 
  5 votes, 0.6%

Go to Heaven for the climate and hell for the company. -Mark Twain (write-in)
 
  5 votes, 0.6%

Do not walk behind me, I will not lead. Do not walk in front of me, I will not follow. Just walk beside me, and be my friend. ~Albert Camus (write-in)
 
  4 votes, 0.5%

"Centrum Permanebit" -The Fiery Heart (write-in)
 
  4 votes, 0.5%

Non-cooperation with evil is a duty -- Mahatma Gandhi (write-in)
 
  4 votes, 0.5%

"don't trust anyone who hasn't brought a book with them." Lemony Snicket (write-in)
 
  3 votes, 0.3%

“And leaving you (there aren't words to untangle it) Your life, fearful and immense and blossoming, so that, sometimes frustrated, and sometimes understanding, Your life is sometimes a stone in you, and then, a star.” Rainer Maria Rilke (write-in)
 
  3 votes, 0.3%

Life is what happens while you're making your plans. - Allen Saunders (write-in)
 
  3 votes, 0.3%

"We are built like the cities of Troy on our previous selves. Every night we sleep uneasily on their rubble." --Andrew Brown (write-in)
 
  3 votes, 0.3%

Wherefore art thou Romeo (write-in)
 
  2 votes, 0.2%

"Sometimes people are beautiful. Not in looks. Not in what they say. Just in who they are." -I Am the Messanger (write-in)
 
  2 votes, 0.2%

"Chacun à son goût" (each to his own taste) -Prince Orlofsky from Die Fledermaus (write-in)
 
  2 votes, 0.2%

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.Bauvard
 
  2 votes, 0.2%

“Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.” (write-in)
 
  2 votes, 0.2%

real man (write-in)
 
  1 vote, 0.1%

The hardest thing in this work is to live in it "joss whedom (write-in)
 
  1 vote, 0.1%

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