Carlton Mellick III

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Carlton Mellick III

Goodreads Author

in Phoenix, Arizona, The United States




Member Since
May 2008

Carlton Mellick III (July 2, 1977, Phoenix, Arizona) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He calls his style of writing "avant-punk," and is currently one of the leading authors in the recent 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature[citation needed] with Steve Aylett, Chris Genoa and D. Harlan Wilson.

Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.

Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ev

My new book, “Every Time We Meet at the Dairy Queen, Your Whole Fucking Face Explodes,” is now available.


Ethan is in love with the weird girl in school. The one with the twitchy eyes and spiders in her hair. The one who can’t sit still for even a minute and speaks in an odd squeaky voice. The one they call Spiderweb.


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Published on April 27, 2016 03:32 • 35 views
Average rating: 3.82 · 13,296 ratings · 1,691 reviews · 77 distinct works · Similar authors
Satan Burger

3.57 avg rating — 1,405 ratings — published 2001 — 5 editions
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The Haunted Vagina

3.60 avg rating — 1,229 ratings — published 2006 — 6 editions
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3.72 avg rating — 826 ratings — published 2008 — 3 editions
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The Baby Jesus Butt Plug

3.56 avg rating — 675 ratings — published 2004 — 3 editions
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The Cannibals of Candyland

3.92 avg rating — 629 ratings — published 2009 — 7 editions
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Zombies and Shit

4.19 avg rating — 493 ratings — published 2010 — 3 editions
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The Bizarro Starter Kit

3.83 avg rating — 456 ratings — published 2006
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The Menstruating Mall

3.69 avg rating — 517 ratings — published 2005 — 3 editions
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Razor Wire Pubic Hair

3.40 avg rating — 474 ratings — published 2003 — 5 editions
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War Slut

3.41 avg rating — 366 ratings — published 2006 — 4 editions
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More books by Carlton Mellick III…

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Carlton's Recent Updates

Carlton III is now friends with Levan Dzneladze
" Not any time soon. Back catalog is getting kindle-ized first, at a rate of about 1 book every 6 weeks. With 30 books to go it could take a while. "
Carlton III made a comment on OUT NOW: Clownfellas
" It was published through Hydra, an ebook-only imprint of Random House. They usually only do ebook editions. "
HELP!  A Bear is Eating Me! by Mykle Hansen
Smashed, Squashed, Splattered, Chewed, Chunked and Spewed by Lance Carbuncle
Vote on this list »
Carlton III made a comment on Works in Progress
" There might also be two more after that one. "
" cuddly holocausts are next "
MPD Psycho, Volume 7 by Eiji Otsuka
" Awesome! I hope they'll do the same with Eden: It's an Endless World. "
Carlton III rated a book it was amazing
A Hundred Horrible Sorrows of Ogner Stump by Andrew Goldfarb
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Slag Attack by Andersen Prunty
Slag Attack
by Andersen Prunty (Goodreads Author)
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Carlton III rated a book it was amazing
The Magazine of Bizarro Fiction by Jeff Burk
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More of Carlton's books…
“Closing your mind to religion is no different than the close-mindedness that
religions can cause.”
Carlton Mellick III, Satan Burger

“Maybe I’m drunk right now, even though I don’t remember drinking anything.
When I’m drunk, I say things without thinking. Drinking numbs you from your ability to
reason. It makes you forget your own character and become a crazy. Maybe I am a
crazy now; I’m going through so much chaos these days that reality is hard to grasp.”
Carlton Mellick III, Satan Burger

“That is the moral of this story, kids. No matter how many people try to stomp on your happiness, you have the power to do whatever you want with your life.”
Carlton Mellick III, The Faggiest Vampire


Which book would you like to read for August's group read?

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12 total votes

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 Mike Thanks for accepting my friend request wanted to ask you if you would jump on over to there is a call for submissions for an anthology there and a bunch of other cool stuff

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