Christopher Moore's Blog
November 12, 2009
Hey Kids,
The chilly claws of winter are scratching at the door,
it gets dark at 5:00, and slick of smashed pumpkins has finally
worn off the sidewalks, which can mean only one thing… That's right,
the apocalypse is nigh!
No wait, it's the holiday season is looming over us like a great cinnamon-scented
bird of prey. And nothing hits the spot during the holidays like Zombies
No wait, it means that the holiday season is
looming over us like a great cinnamon-scented
bird of prey. And nothing hits t...
November 4, 2009
Chapter 1: Hello Kitty
Being the Journal of Abigail Von Normal,
Emergency Back-up Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Night
The city of San Francisco is being stalked by a huge, shaved vampyre cat named Chet, and only I, Abby Normal, emergency back-up mistress of the greater Bay Area night, and my manga-haired love monkey, Foo Dog, stand between the ravenous monster and a bloody massacre of the general public. Which isn't, like, as bad as it sounds, because the general public kind of sucks ass.
Sti...
October 23, 2009
I think we all remember that famous line from Othello:
"The fug are you lookin' at, ya fuggin mook?"
Which seems to be written just for the New Jersey Shakespeare Company.
Well, those fuggin mooks have invited me to invite you to a reading of scenes of Fool,
by real fuggin actors, interspersed with anecdotes and amusements by my own
self, and followed by a Q&A and whatnot, for:
T...
September 25, 2009
First, on a light post in Auvers, France. A lost kitty poster…

On the Alexandre III bridge — the clear danger of pissing off the sculpture…

In the late 19th Century, there was a lot of public art, both in France and in England, that personified different industries. It's like the ruling class just went, "I don't care what it actually is, just make it look like agriculture."

Then, there are always the national heroes:

And the institutions they founded:

You start with this, then they take one wall a...
September 23, 2009
So, I visited The Pantheon, which is the place where France keeps many of it's famous dead guys. It cost like $12 to get in, so I was really hoping for a cool animatronic display of famous dead guys, with maybe Jules Verne driving Captain Nemo's Nautilus and Marie Antoinette getting guillotined every quarter hour or so. But no, all of the famous dead people in the Parthenon are inside of boxes or jars or both.
Here is the philosopher, Jean Jacques Rousseau, who explored the ideas of...
You can't throw a stick in Paris without hitting a Gothic Cathedral (which, by the way, they are totally touchy about, so if you can control yourself, don't throw a stick while in Paris), and at each cathedral, there is an array of gargoyles, which were, back in the day, used to direct rainwater away from the stone walls.
This is how they are done. They just sit there, doing nothing, now that most cathedrals have been equipped with gutters and downspouts.

In my new, improved version, gargoyles...
You can't throw a stick in Paris without hitting a Gothic Cathedral (which, by the way, they are totally touchy about, so if you can control yourself, don't throw a stick while in Paris), and at each cathedral, there is an array of gargoyles, which were, back in the day, used to direct rainwater away from the stone walls.
This is how they are done. They just sit there, doing nothing, now that most cathedrals have been equipped with gutters and downspouts.

In my new, improved version, gargoyles...
September 17, 2009
Bon Jour. Today more art from Paris, my dusty love rodents. Come now, enjoy culture, the beauty, creepiness that is public art in Paris…
IN Jardin des Tuileries (or Garden of Tiles, which, we in the U.S. call, The Mall). This one of the many statues that depict athletics.

Our open field running rocks when we play the midget team!
Naked American Football is HUGE in France. Strangely, they use a pigeon as a ball.

The Job...
September 7, 2009
Here's some stuff that I've seen lately, out and about in Paris, for those of you who don't get the Twitter feed, and some stuff that wasn't on there.
First, if you're on the Left Bank of the Seine, and you're looking for a little fast Greek Food,
What Do You Want?
That's RIGHT! When a BIG ASS GYRO isn't enough? Also, not a bad stripper name.
Just saying.
I know you loves the French cheese, oui?
Sure, they may be behind us in some things, but they are years beyond us in Cheese.

My friends Max...
September 4, 2009
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