Celia Rivenbark
Author profile
born
The United States
gender
female
website
genre
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We're Just Like You, Only Prettier: Confessions of a Tarnished Southern Belle
— published 2004 — 7 editions |
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Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank: And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom
— published 2006 — 6 editions |
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Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
— published 2000 — 4 editions |
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You Can't Drink All Day If You Don't Start in the Morning
— published 2009 — 5 editions |
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Belle Weather: Mostly Sunny with a Chance of Scattered Hissy Fits
— published 2008 — 8 editions |
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You Don't Sweat Much for a Fat Girl: Observations on Life from the Shallow End of the Pool
— published 2011 — 3 editions |
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She Drives Me Crazy: Three Favorite Essays
— published 2011 — 2 editions |
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Rude Bitches Make Me Tired
— expected publication 2013 — 2 editions |
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The Height of Rudeness: Four Sneak Peek Essays Plus One Exclusive!
— expected publication 2013 |
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“I really loathe [the bumper sticker] 'Proud Parent of a Terrific Kid!'
Why not a bumper sticker for the unlucky parents, something like: 'My Fifteen-Year-Old's in Detox and Not Speaking to Any of Us' or 'My Kid Robbed a 7-Eleven and is in a Center for Youthful Offenders.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
Why not a bumper sticker for the unlucky parents, something like: 'My Fifteen-Year-Old's in Detox and Not Speaking to Any of Us' or 'My Kid Robbed a 7-Eleven and is in a Center for Youthful Offenders.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
“[Home Economics Textbook from 1950]: "Prepare yourself. Take fifteen minutes to rest so you'll look refreshed when hubby comes home from work. Touch up makeup and put a ribbon in your hair. He's just been with work-weary people. Be a little gay. His boring day needs a lift."
Mama Celia: "Get knee-walking drunk. You've earned it. You've been with four kids under the age of seven all day. Put a ribbon in your nose and try to pull it out of your mouth. You're wasted, after all. Announce you're gay. The look on his face will give you a lift.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
Mama Celia: "Get knee-walking drunk. You've earned it. You've been with four kids under the age of seven all day. Put a ribbon in your nose and try to pull it out of your mouth. You're wasted, after all. Announce you're gay. The look on his face will give you a lift.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
“I'd sooner wear white shoes in February, drink unsweetened tea, and eat Miracle Whip instead of Duke's than utter the words 'you guys'.”
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
― Celia Rivenbark, Bless Your Heart, Tramp: And Other Southern Endearments
Topics Mentioning This Author
| topics | posts | views | last activity | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| The Next Best Boo...: Books That Made You LOL | 60 | 422 | Dec 01, 2009 06:58am | |
| The Next Best Boo...: April's Group Read Are!!! | 123 | 595 | Apr 02, 2010 04:42pm | |
| The Seasonal Read...: 20.1 (The Most Improved Player - Cindy AL - April Fool) | 73 | 165 | May 20, 2010 01:41pm | |
| M/T Reading Friends: august 2010 - sandi | 11 | 39 | Sep 08, 2010 06:16am | |
| Readers and Reading: August 2010 reads | 25 | 80 | Sep 19, 2010 09:12am | |
| Challenge: 50 Books: KERRI's Looking Beyond 50 for 2010! | 136 | 186 | Oct 31, 2010 08:38pm | |
| Pick-a-Shelf: Emily's YOU CHOOSE Challenge | 11 | 40 | Nov 01, 2010 12:16pm | |
| Cozy Mysteries : Worst/Funniest Book Title | 50 | 184 | Nov 07, 2010 02:24pm | |
| Audiobooks: Recommendations? | 59 | 108 | Dec 23, 2010 12:08pm |
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