Jon Konrath

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Jon Konrath

Goodreads Author


Born
in Grand Forks AFB, The United States
Website

Twitter

Genre

Influences

Member Since
December 2007

URL


Jon Konrath has written and published a dozen or so books, including Summer Rain and Rumored to Exist. He is the principal of Paragraph Line Books and editor of the literary journal Paragraph Line (ParagraphLine.com), and written for many other zines and publications. He is also an inventor, computer programmer, and amateur x-ray technician. He lives in Oakland, and has bought 40 acres of land in the mountains of Colorado, where he plans to build a heavily-armed compound. He can be found online at rumored.com and paragraphline.com.

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Jon Konrath I have a buddy who lives in India that can get me really good cough syrup, like the kind of stuff you can't leave around the house if you have kids…moreI have a buddy who lives in India that can get me really good cough syrup, like the kind of stuff you can't leave around the house if you have kids because it will kill them, like that has chunks of codeine in it so big you can see them floating around like that weird soda with the balls of gelatin in it from the 90s. I drink about four or five bottles of that, put on the first Black Sabbath album, and then throw shit out of my third story window until I can write again. It works!!!(less)
Jon Konrath Spell check is for pussies. And all of the best writers made their own covers with MS Paint. Don't spend time trying to correct your stuff to get more…moreSpell check is for pussies. And all of the best writers made their own covers with MS Paint. Don't spend time trying to correct your stuff to get more readers. Just turn out as shitty a product as possible - this is all about volume. (less)
Average rating: 4.23 · 377 ratings · 166 reviews · 21 distinct works · Similar authors
Atmospheres

4.06 avg rating — 32 ratings — published 2014 — 3 editions
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Thunderbird

4.42 avg rating — 26 ratings — published 2013 — 2 editions
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The Earworm Inception

4.03 avg rating — 29 ratings — published 2012 — 3 editions
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Sleep Has No Master

4.52 avg rating — 21 ratings — published 2012 — 3 editions
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He

4.73 avg rating — 15 ratings — published 2015 — 2 editions
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Rumored to Exist

4.36 avg rating — 14 ratings — published 2002 — 5 editions
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Mandatory Laxative #14

4.80 avg rating — 10 ratings
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The Memory Hunter

4.73 avg rating — 11 ratings — published 2014 — 3 editions
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Fistful of Pizza

4.06 avg rating — 17 ratings — published 2011 — 3 editions
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Air in the Paragraph Line #13

by
4.88 avg rating — 8 ratings — published 2007
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More books by Jon Konrath…

I’m back from a week-long trip to London. Had a decent time, but caught a cold and flew back with it, which has rendered me deaf, voiceless, and stupid. Spent the weekend on NyQuil, trying to sleep it off, but I’m still not there yet.


The weather wasn’t entirely cooperative, but that meant more time in museums. A brief rundown:



Science Museum – I actually went here twice. The Apollo 10 command mo... Read more of this blog post »
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Published on June 06, 2016 16:59 • 5 views

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I bought this at the gift store in the Handel&Hendrix museum in London, and probably should have read up on it before the impulse purchase.

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“We worship Satan and only eat GMO foods. All hail Monsanto!”
Jon Konrath, He

“He set down his chili dog, and after a pondering moment of silence, he replied with words of wisdom I’d never forget: “Fuck women. Fuck school. Fuck money. Go write some books, get a good agent, lift weights, get tattoos, and never do a film with Keanu Reeves.”
Jon Konrath, Fistful of Pizza

“I go to look up the elevation of the Golden Gate bridge on Wikipedia, and an hour later I’m watching four guys in lucha libre masks fuck a dolphin.”
Jon Konrath, Atmospheres

“When his life was ruined, his family killed, his farm destroyed, Job knelt down on the ground and yelled up to the heavens, "Why god? Why me?" and the thundering voice of God answered, There's just something about you that pisses me off.”
Stephen King, Storm of the Century: An Original Screenplay

“I learned to write because I am one of those people who somehow cannot manage the common communications of smiles and gestures, but must use words to get across things that other people would never need to say.”
Bill James

“I figured out years ago that the human species is totally fucked and has been for a long time. I also know that the sick, media-consumer culture in America continues to make this so-called problem worse. But the trick, folks, is not to give a fuck. Like me. I really don't
care. I stopped worrying about all this temporal bullshit a long time ago. It's meaningless. ”
George Carlin

“there is enough treachery, hatred violence absurdity in the average
human being to supply any given army on any given day and the best at murder are those who preach against it
and the best at hate are those who preach love and the best at war finally are those who preach peace”
Charles Bukowski

“Fucking GUNS are fucking AWESOME and when you SHOOT them at SHIT, they fucking KILL it!”
Shamus McCarty, Texas Biker Zombies From Outer Space

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