"Garcia wondered why people with JESUS stickers on their bumper always drove twenty miles per hour under the speed limit. If God was my co-pilot, he thought, I'd be doing a hundred and twenty."
— Carl Hiaasen (Strip Tease)

"Hey. Sometimes life is a shit flavored Popsicle."
— Carl Hiaasen (Nature Girl)

"...Right now there's a pair of bad cops on their way out here to shoot me'
'You don't know that,'
'Yeah, you're right,' Stranahan said. 'They're probably just collecting Toys for Tots. Now go.'"
— Carl Hiaasen

"'Remember what happened last time with the 'cuda.'
"
— Carl Hiaasen