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Phil Robertson quotes (showing 1-30 of 54)

“Our founding fathers started this country and built it on God and His Word, and this country sure would be a better place to live and raise our children if we still followed their ideals and beliefs.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“If men were in charge of carrying and birthing our babies, we'd have a lot fewer people on Earth, because we'd only do it once- I can promise you that!”
Phil Robertson
“Happy happy happy”
Phil Robertson
“I'm standing under a sign that says, 'Budweiser is king of beers,' and everybody's got their beers here today," I told them. "But I'm here to talk about the King of Kings. I know I might look like a preacher, but I'm not. Here's how you can tell whether someone's a preacher or not: if he gets up and says some words and passes a hat for you to put money in, that's a preacher. This is free. This if free of charge, which proves I'm not a preacher.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Let me tell you something: I salute womanhood worldwide, because women are exceptionally tough for enduring the misery of childbirth. I've cleaned hogs and gutted deer, but in my experience on Earth I've never witnessed such a brutal event.”
Phil Robertson
“I have a God-given right to pursue happiness, and happiness to me is killing things, skinning them, plucking them, and then having a good meal. What makes me happy is going out and blowing a duck's head off.”
Phil Robertson
“Everywhere my sons and I go, we're telling people the good news about Jesus, blowing duck calls, and making people, happy, happy– then down the road we go.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Whether it was hunting, fishing, or playing sports, my children were going to grow up outside. They weren't going to be sitting on the couch inside. At least they didn't grow up to be nerds.”
Phil Robertson
“I've been on this earth for sixty-six years, and I've reached a conclusion and it's a fact: women are strange creatures.”
Phil Robertson
tags: women
“Whenever I think of all the people we've baptized over the years, I always recall a conversation Jep had with on of his buddies in the backseat of our car when he was really young. Jep's friend Harvey asked him what it meant to be a christian.
"Well, when you get to be about thirteen or fourteen years old, my daddy will sit you down and study the Bible with you," Jep told him. "He'll make sure you know what he's talking about. And then he'll tell you that Jesus is going to be your Lord and when that happens, you can't act bad anymore. If you say yes, we're all going down to the river. We'll be so excited that we'll be skipping down there. My daddy will put you under the water, but he won't drown you. He'll bring you back up and everybody will be clapping and smiling. That's what he'll do.”
Phil Robertson
“It's like Jase says: when you don't know what you're doing, it's best to do it quickly!”
Phil Robertson
“Lord, if You bless me, I’ll thank You; but if You don’t, I’ll be thankful for what I have. I have plenty. I’m in good shape.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“The ungodly put the ungodly in office. And now we’re expecting them to be godly and treat us with love and kindness? It is impossible for the ungodly to elect the ungodly and then expect godliness to come from them. The corrupt elect the corrupt and the corruption continues. The depraved elect the depraved and the depravity continues. If you want kindness, love, peace, patience, goodness, and faithfulness—the characteristics you will find in godly men and women—you better get godly in a hurry and elect as many godly politicians as you can.”
Phil Robertson, unPHILtered: The Way I See It
“Like I said earlier, Jase was the only one of our four sons who stayed the course and never deviated to the right or left. He always looked straight ahead; he never drank, never cursed, and always lived his life the way God wanted him to live. I think one of the reasons Jase and Willie never strayed too far is because they were so involved in the youth group at White’s Ferry Road Church. Willie’s only problem was that he believed he was a ladie’s man until he met Korie. He was always jumping from one girl to the next until he settled down. It really made an impact on both of them. Jase was always looking out for his brothers. Even though Jase and Willie were very competitive growing up, Jase always had Willie’s best interest at heart. One time, Willie and Jase were at a friend’s house in high school. Jase walked into the basement and found Willie playing strip poker with some other kids.
“What are you doing?” Jase asked him.
“Playing strip poker,” Willie replied.
“You’ve stripped enough,” Jase told him. “Let’s go.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Since I was a little kid, I've had this profound connection and love for the deep, dark, unmolested woods. I've always had a longing to be in the deep woods or in the water. I want to be on lakes, streams, and rivers and surrounded by everything that comes with it - the ducks, birds, fish, and other wildlife. I guess it's in my DNA, and I just love being out there. Even to this day, it's where I want to be.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“When people dream something as a child, it doesn’t always come true. But my childhood dream of what kind of man I would marry and spend the rest of my life with did come true.
I always knew my husband would be tall, dark, and handsome, but he also had to have a rugged look, as if he’d just walked out of the wilderness. He had to love the outdoors and be able to survive there if needed. I also wanted him to be able to take command of any situation when needed.
I wanted him to be a leader but with a sense of humor, too. I wanted him to work and make a living. I wanted him to be a man’s man, but with gentleness and love for me and his children, and be ready to defend us at all times. More than anything else, I wanted to feel loved and protected.
What I didn’t know when I found the man who filled my dreams was that I had found a diamond in the rough. It would take a lifetime to perfect that diamond on the long journey of life.
Phil and I have had many good years, some hard years, a few sad years, and a lot of struggling years to get where we are now. God put us in each other’s paths. It has always been a wonderful ride for me.
I have a husband who is my best buddy and friend, my lover, my Christian brother, my champion, and the person who will always be there through thick and thin.
There is no greater love than your love for God, but right under that is your love for your husband, your partner in life. One of the greatest tragedies I see is people not putting every effort into the foundation of their marriage. My grandmother told me that it’s one man and one woman for life and that your marriage is worth fighting for. We had a few hard and bumpy years, but prayer, patience, and some suffering and hope-plus remembering an old lady’s words-were what got me through the difficult times. We have given it our all for our marriage and family, and my dreams did come true. Phil is and will always be my hero!”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“I’m not going askew from the principles on which the United States was built; I’m right there with our founding fathers. I’m a patriot and a Christian, and I’m moving forth with what they started. But now it’s gotten to where I’m some kind of nut or Bible beater.
I say, so be it. I’ll still go across the country spreading God’s Word, like I’ve done since I was twenty-eight. I may be only one man reading Scripture and quotes, carrying his Bible, and blowing duck calls to crowds, but, hey, it has to start somewhere. It’s what makes me happy, happy, happy.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Then one day our phone rang, and the voice on the other end said, “I need to talk to Mr. Robertson.”
“Yeah, that’s me,” I answered.
“Are you the one who’s getting duck calls into Walmart stores?” the man asked me.
“Yes, that’s me,” I told him.
“Son, let me ask you a question,” he said. “How did you get duck calls into the Walmart chain without going through me?”
“Well, just who are you?” I asked.
“I’m the buyer for Walmart!” he screamed.
There was a pause.
“One store at a time,” I told him.
There was a long pause.
“Let me get this right,” he said. “You mean to tell me you’ve been driving around in your pickup truck and convincing our sporting goods departments to buy duck calls without even conferring with me, who’s supposed to be doing the buying for the whole Walmart chain?”
“Sir, I didn’t mean to slight you or anything,” I said. “Look, I didn’t even know who you were. Bentonville’s a long way. I’m just trying to survive down here!”
He thought about that for a minute, then said, “I’ll tell you what I’m going to do. Anybody who can pull a stunt like that, I’m going to write you a letter authorizing you to do what you’ve been doing.”
“Man, I appreciate that,” I told him.
“I’m going to authorize you to go into our stores,” he said. “You’ll have that letter from me, and that makes it all aboveboard.”
“Hey, I’d appreciate any help you can give me,” I said.
So the buyer in Bentonville wrote me a letter and sent it to me. I got the letter and showed it to every store manager I met. They all told me, “Come on in, Mr. Robertson.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“By the time these kids are young adults, they're going to have to go to Walmart to buy a personality.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“If you provide the drive, dream, and vision, with God’s help, you can accomplish anything.”
Phil Robertson, unPHILtered: The Way I See It
“We really need to decide what’s important in our lives. Life doesn’t have to be so complicated. We need to figure out the people we want to spend our time with and what we want to accomplish. We need to examine our commitments and declutter our lives. If we have stress coming out of our pores, we need to commit to doing less each day.”
Phil Robertson, unPHILtered: The Way I See It
“Kids in America today are overweight and lazy, and it's their parents fault for letting it happen.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Save your money, buy only what you need, give generously, and, most important, prepare yourself for God’s inheritance.”
Phil Robertson, unPHILtered: The Way I See It
“Please know that I never make any judgments about who's going to heaven and hell. That's the Almighty's job. My job is to love Him, love you, share the Good News, and then move on down the road.”
Phil Robertson
“The thing I really like about Jase is that he’s as obsessed with ducks as I am. I rarely took my boys hunting with me when they were very young. In fact, I never took them when I was still an outlaw. “Not this time, boys, we might be running from the game warden,” I’d tell them. But after I repented and came to Jesus Christ, I started taking my sons hunting with me, beginning with Alan. Before we moved to where we live now, it was a pretty long haul from town to the Ouachita River bottoms. Alan got carsick nearly every time I took him hunting, but he didn’t think I knew. We stopped at the same gas station every time, and he’d walk around back and lose his breakfast before he climbed back into the truck. I was proud of him for never complaining.
I took Jase hunting for the first time when he was five. He was shooting Pa’s heavy Belgium-made Browning twelve-gauge shotgun, which he could barely even hold up. It kicked like a mule! The first time Jase shot the gun, it kicked him to the back of the blind and flipped him over a bench.
“Did I get him?” Jase asked.
I knew right then that I had another hunter in the family, and Jase is still the most skilled hunter of all my boys. I trained Jase to take over the company by teaching him the nuances of duck calls and fowl hunting, and he is still the person in charge of making sure every duck call sounds like a duck. Not only did Jase design the first gadwall drake call to hit the market, he also invented the first triple-reed duck caller. Jase and I live to hunt ducks. We track ducks during the season through a nationwide network of hunters, asking how many ducks are in their areas and what movements are expected. Then we check conditions of wind and weather fronts that might influence duck movement. We talk it all over during the day and again each morning, before the day’s hunt, as we prepare to leave for the blind.
When Kay and I began to ponder becoming less active in the Duck Commander business, we offered its management to Jase, who had been most deeply involved in the company. But he had no desire to get into management. Jase likes building duck calls and doesn’t really enjoy the business aspects of the company, like making sales calls or dealing with clients and sponsors. Like me, Jase is most comfortable when he’s in a duck blind and doesn’t care for the details that come with running a company. Jase only wants to build duck calls, shoot ducks, and spend time with his family (he and his wife, Missy, have three kids).”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“The more makeup a woman wears, the more she’s trying to hide; makeup can hide a lot of evil.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“I like to think of myself as a guerilla fighter for Jesus.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“I’ll never forget one night Jep was coming home late and got his truck stuck in a muddy road close to where we live. It was in the late 1990s, so Jep had one of the early cell phones in a bag in his truck. It was after midnight, and he called home and Kay woke me up to get Jep out of the mud. I had a Jeep that I bought brand-new in 1974, but it was pretty old by then, and the lights didn’t work anymore. I usually only drove the Jeep to my duck hole and back. So I had Kay follow me in her car to provide lights for me to see. It was still raining pretty heavily when we got to the field where Jep’s truck was stuck. I jumped out of my Jeep to winch his truck out, but then Kay pulled up right next to me, not realizing she’d driven into the soft mud! Now Jep was stuck in front of me, and Kay was stuck behind me. “I am surrounded by idiots!” I screamed.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Not everyone on campus was fond of my hobbies. After football practice one day, one of my coaches informed me that the dean of men wanted to see me. I wasn’t sure what I had done wrong, but I knew they had me on something. I walked into the office, and he asked me to close the door.
“We have a problem,” he said. “Do you know what street you live on? Do you know the name of it?”
“Vetville?” I asked him.
“Let me refresh your memory,” he said. “You live on Scholar Drive.”
Apparently, the president of Louisiana Tech had given members of the board of trustees a tour of campus the day before.
“When we went to where you live, it wasn’t very scholarly,” the dean told me. “There were old boats, motors, duck decoys, and fishnets littering your front yard. He was embarrassed. This is an institution of higher learning.”
“That’s my equipment,” I told him.
“But everybody’s yard is mowed-except yours,” he replied.
“At least the frost will get it,” I said. “It will lay down flat as a pancake when the frost gets it.”
“It’s July,” the dean said. “Cut your grass.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy
“Kay found six and a half acres of land just off the Ouachita River at the mouth of Cypress Creek outside of West Monroe, Louisiana. It was at the end of a dirt road in one of the most heavily forested areas on the river. The classified advertisement in the newspaper described it as a “Sportsman’s Paraside.” When we drove out to see the land, I knew it was perfect as soon as we crested the hill that leads down to the house where we still live today. The place was absolutely perfect.
The real estate lady sensed my excitement and told me, “Now, Mr. Robertson, I’m required by law to inform you that this home sits in a floodplain.”
“Perfect,” I told her. “I wouldn’t want it if it didn’t.”
Phil Robertson, Happy, Happy, Happy

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