quotes by Jeri Smith-Ready

"Sorry," she said. "I have a psychological disorder that prevents me from keeping thoughts inside my head where they belong. "
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"No wonder these people don’t believe in evolution. It obviously hasn’t worked in their favor."
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"I love eating chicken with my bare hands. It makes me want to snarl at people, even more than usual."
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"You obviously haven’t lived in D.C. very long if you think two and a half minutes is too soon to talk politics."
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"Jesus loves you.”
“Then how come he never calls?"
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"Do you always introduce yourself by insulting people?"
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"A spontaneous proposition deserves a spontaneous response."
"You gave me a spontaneous response when you said no."
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)

"This time of year," she said, "people’s consciences gnaw at them. They give away truckloads of canned goods and quote Dickens and wring their hands over the ‘less fortunate.’" We boarded the Metro and took seats perpendicular to each other. "But God forbid anyone should address why they’re poor in the first place, or try to change the structures that keep them poor. Then the ‘less fortunate’ turn into ‘welfare queens’ and ‘derelicts.’ But if I were a lobbyist whoring on behalf of some transnational corporation, I’d never hear the word ‘derelict.’"

"So when it comes to taking care of poor people," I said, "if Mother Teresa is the Hallmark card, then you’re the electric bill."
— Jeri Smith-Ready (Requiem for the Devil)