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Jana Deleon quotes (showing 1-30 of 43)

“I've barely said five words to you. What indication could you possibly have that I am a Yankee?"

"Well, we could start with the words 'what indication.' Someone from south of the Mason-Dixon would have said, 'Who the hell are you calling a Yankee?' Then we would have fought.”
Jana Deleon
“Are you sure you weren't adopted?"
"Mom would like to think so, but it was a natural birth, so her memory's real clear.”
Jana Deleon, Unlucky
“Facebook had to be the biggest playground for self-absorbed assholes that the world had ever seen.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“I’d always gone out of my way to streamline my life—removing all potential complication. I suddenly realized that mostly meant not having people around. Clearly, people were the biggest complication life threw at you.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“Lord save us all from the machinations of an intelligent female.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“Slapping a man across the face with a fish hasn’t been sexy since the fifties.”
Jana Deleon, Lethal Bayou Beauty
“To my husband, Harold, I leave the Lower Bayou Motel. You’ve spent so many nights there with other women that I felt you should call the place home. It’s been operating in the red for the last eight years, owes back taxes since 1986, and is covered with deadly asbestos. Nothing but the best for you, dear.”
Jana Deleon, Trouble in Mudbug
“True,'' Ida Belle said, ''but despite all of that, he's still interested. I may be an old maid, but I know what male interest looks like.''
Gertie waved a hand at her. ''Walter slipping you a free pack of toilet paper with your grocery order hardly qualifies as the ultimate in male interest. But despite Ida Belles overblown description of her knowledge of how men think, I think she's right this time”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Sniper
“God doesn't care about drinking beer. All those rules were made up by people trying to prevent you from doing something really wrong. Drunks make stupid decisions. If you don't drink, there’s less chance of doing something stupid.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“If we can’t laugh at ourselves, who can we laugh at?” I stared at her. “Other people?”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Team 3
“You’re implying that Gertie is too old to be having fun, and that’s wrong. If Gertie wants to dress like a hooker and ride an alligator float down the bayou when she’s a hundred and two, she should do it.”
Jana Deleon, Soldiers of Fortune
“The dead didn’t show up to their own funerals and call people assholes.”
Jana Deleon, Trouble in Mudbug
“Pity was for those who couldn’t do anything about it.”
Jana Deleon, Ghost-in-Law Series 1-3 Boxset
“Marshmallow Man dressed in Pepto-Bismol.”
Jana Deleon, Trouble in Mudbug
“She closed her eyes and shook her head. I was fairly certain she was praying—whether it was for strength or a vial of untraceable poison, I wasn’t certain.”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Team 3
“wasn’t any place on my body I”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“pistol.”
Jana Deleon, Soldiers of Fortune
“Ida Belle nodded. "All sorts of things rose out of the ground during Edgar. Why, my mother's coffin popped straight up out of the grave and cruised down Main Street. I always said you couldn't keep Moter down”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“Forrest Gump had gotten it all wrong. Life wasn’t a box of chocolates. It was a box of ex-lax, and I felt like I’d consumed the entire thing.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“Did you ever think you had all the answers when you were in the thick of something, but then when you take a step back, you realize you were so busy getting things done that you never stopped to ask yourself if it’s what you really want to do?”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“Is a couple of hairs above my lip really worthy of this much effort?” I asked. “Yes,” they both replied at once.”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Team 3
“Emma ended the call and slipped her phone back into”
Jana Deleon, Malevolent
“Maryse stared. “You hear her, too?” Luc grimaced. “Unfortunately. Why do you think I looked behind you when”
Jana Deleon, Trouble in Mudbug
“thought”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Team 3
“Forrest Gump had gotten it all wrong. Life wasn't a box of chocolates. It was a box of ex-lax, and I felt like I'd consumed the entire thing.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot
“The idiot wrote that message on his utility bill.”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Sniper
“Gertie hit the brakes and tried to stop, but she tripped over a lip in the sidewalk and went sprawling right into the burro, then hit the pavement, her tutu skirt flipped up over her back, exposing her camouflage underwear. Tiny swung his head around to see what all the racket was and launched off the car door, setting off down the sidewalk toward the burro-Gertie wreck at high speed.”
Jana Deleon, Gator Bait
“I don’t know whether to be happy he’s made my job so easy,” Carter said, “or pissed off that someone that stupid not only roams the earth, but lives in my hometown.”
Jana Deleon, Swamp Sniper
“Run!” Helena cried and ran down the staircase. Maryse took the steps two at a time, passing Helena on the way, and almost fell as she hit the foyer floor. The scream of police sirens was far too close for comfort, and Maryse struggled to pick up the pace. Skidding on the polished wood, she dashed around the corner and onto the textured tile in the kitchen, where her shoes had a much better grip and she picked up some speed. She ran into the laundry room, shoving down the window where she’d entered the house. Then she rushed out the side door, locking it before she slammed it behind her. She made for the huge hedge of bushes that separated Helena”
Jana Deleon, Ghost-in-Law Series 1-3 Boxset
“And that pissed me all the way off.”
Jana Deleon, Louisiana Longshot

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Jana Deleon
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Trouble in Mudbug (Ghost-in-Law, #1) Trouble in Mudbug
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Louisiana Longshot (Miss Fortune Mystery #1) Louisiana Longshot
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