Goodreads helps you follow your favorite authors. Be the first to learn about new releases!
Start by following Dossie Easton.

Dossie Easton Dossie Easton > Quotes


Dossie Easton quotes (showing 1-30 of 35)

“The real test of love is when a person—including you—can know your weaknesses, your stupidities and your smallnesses, and still love you.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“One remedy for the fear of not being loved is to remember how good it feels to love someone. If you're feeling unloved and you want to feel better, go love someone, and see what happens.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“The cultural ban on having sex with your friends is an inevitable offshoot of a societal belief that the only acceptable reason to have sex is to lead to a monogamous marriagelike relationship.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“It felt so wonderful that she concluded that the existence of her clitoris was proof positive that God loved her.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“A lot of people describe having sex with only one person as 'being faithful'.
It seems to me that faithfulness has very little to do with who you have sex with.
Faithfulness is about honoring your commitments and respecting your friends and lovers, about caring for their well-being as well as your own.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“Most of us need some support in asking for what we want. When we are involved in making agreements, we need to feel sure that the needs we reveal will not be held against us. Most of us feel pretty vulnerable in and around our emotional limits, so it’s important to recognize that these limits are valid: “I need to feel loved,” “I need to feel that I’m important to you,” “I need to know that you find me attractive,” “I need you to listen and care about me when I feel hurt.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“If you believe that you can use sex to shore up your fragile self-esteem by stealing someone else's, we feel sorry for you, because this will never work to build a solid sense of self worth, and you will have to go on stealing more and more and never getting fulfilled.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“When penetration is desired, the focus is on what works for the recipient: we have yet to meet a dildo that got hung up on its own needs.”
Dossie Easton
“One of the most valuable things we can learn from open sexual lifestyles is that our programming is changeable.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“This kind of love can be thrilling and overwhelming and sometimes a hell of a lot of fun, but it is not the only “real” kind of love, nor is it always a good basis for an ongoing relationship. Yet as George Bernard Shaw famously remarked, “When two people are under the influence of the most violent, most insane, most delusive, and most transient of passions, they are required to swear that they will remain in that excited, abnormal, and exhausting condition continuously until death do them part.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Love is not a real-world limit: the mother of nine children can love each of them as much as the mother of an only child.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“the most successful long-term relationships are the ones with enough flexibility to redefine themselves over and over again through the years.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“GREAT SLUTS are made, not born.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Some people habitually respond to a lover’s pain and confusion with an intense desire to fix something. Fix-it messages can feel like invalidation to the person who is trying to express an emotion. “Why don’t you just do this … try that … forget about it … relax!” sends the message that the person expressing the emotion has overlooked some obvious and simple solution and is an idiot for feeling bad in the first place. Such messages are disempowering and invalidating.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Fighting is the ultimate act of intimacy.
(...) Intimacy is based on shared vulnerability.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“A final note about love: One remedy for the fear of not being loved is to remember how good it feels to love someone. If you’re feeling unloved and you want to feel better, go love someone, and see what happens.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Nymphomaniac: a woamn that has more sex than you.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“Once you have a handle on loving yourself, you can practice sharing that love with others. You’ve probably been taught to reserve the language of love for when you’re feeling overwhelmingly tender and passionate, and only for those who have made huge commitments to you. We recommend instead learning to recognize and acknowledge all the sweet feelings that make life worthwhile even when they don’t knock you over—and, moreover, learning to communicate those feelings to the people who inspire them.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
“The problem is that when you blame someone else for how you feel, you disempower yourself from finding solutions. If this is someone else’s fault, only that person can fix it, right? So poor you can’t do anything but sit there and moan. On”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“When we tell our partners that we feel jealous, we are making ourselves vulnerable in a very profound way. When our partners respond with respect, listen to us, validate our feelings, support and reassure us, we feel better taken care of than we would have if no difficulty had arisen in the first place. So we strongly recommend that you and your partners give each other the profoundly bonding experience of sharing your vulnerabilities. We are all human, we are all vulnerable, and we all need validation.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“How are we to teach our children to say “no” to an abusive adult if we are not frank about what it is that they should say “no” to? When we try to keep sex secret from our kids, they are aware that something is going on, but they don’t know what. And if we leave them to get their sex information in the playground or on the street, from equally ill-informed other kids, we consign them to the jungle.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“When you find yourself responding to someone else’s behavior, it can be easy to dwell on what that person has done and how terrible it is and what exactly they should should do to fix it. Instead, try looking at your own feelings as a true message about your internal state of being, and decide how you want to deal with whatever’s going on.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“A friend of ours, when she trips over some surprisingly intense emotional response, says, philosophically, “Oh well—AFOG,” which stands, she says, for Another Fucking Opportunity for Growth.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“It seems to me that faithfulness has very little to do with who you have sex with.” Faithfulness is about honoring your commitments and respecting your friends and lovers, about caring for their well-being as well as your own. If”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“People often learn about starvation economies in childhood, when parents who are emotionally depleted or unavailable teach us that we must work hard to get our emotional needs met, so that if we relax our vigilance for even a moment, a mysterious someone or something may take the love we need away from us.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Only actions can be crimes. Let us repeat that one: emotions are never wrong; only actions can be wrong. Emotions are an expression of our emotional truth, and truth cannot be wrong. Nor do they need to be justified. They just need to be felt. Remember,”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“The problem is that when you blame someone else for how you feel, you disempower yourself from finding solutions.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Introducing your lovers helps prevent one of the scariest aspects of jealousy, which is the part where you imagine that your lover’s other lover is taller, thinner, smarter, sexier, and in all ways preferable to funky old you. When you meet that other person or when your lovers meet each other, they meet real people, warts and all, and so often wind up feeling safer. Introducing”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“The binary nature of monogamy-centrist thinking tends, we think, to cause problems: you’re either the love of my life, or you’re out of here.”
Dossie Easton, The Ethical Slut : A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures
“Practice self-nurturing, not only to get you through hard times but to guide you into a loving relationship with yourself. When you follow through with a simple act like comforting yourself with homemade soup, bringing home a fragrant flower for your night table, or taking a sweet solitary walk in a beautiful place, then you get an experience of being kind to yourself that can answer all those questions about “what do they mean, love myself?” This question is more easily answered by doing than by thinking.”
Dossie Easton

« previous 1

All Quotes | Add A Quote
Play The 'Guess That Quote' Game

The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities The Ethical Slut
7,216 ratings
The New Bottoming Book The New Bottoming Book
909 ratings
Open Preview
Radical Ecstasy: SM Journeys to Transcendence Radical Ecstasy
134 ratings
Open Preview
When Someone You Love is Kinky When Someone You Love is Kinky
108 ratings
Open Preview