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Robert Brockway quotes (showing 1-13 of 13)

“Also unfortunately, Congress is far too busy asking if baseball players are really as strong as they seem and trying to choke bankers with wads of cash to grant more funds to such trifling matters as the avoidance of space bullets, so they won't give NASA the money”
Robert Brockway
“As human beings we are all keenly aware of our own mortality, but although we know we all have to die eventually, there is some small amount of comfort in knowing that maybe it’s something we could all do together, as a team. There is, after all, no “I” in “apocalypse.”
Robert Brockway, Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead
“Reach into your pocket, a few taps on your smartphone, and you can know anything. We are all omniscient. I have the complete repository of human history sitting two inches away from my dick all day, every day.”
Robert Brockway
“I fucking love Scooby-Doo. That Velma girl—she has it going on. That tight sweater, short skirt, and knee socks? You can’t tell me she got dressed in the dark. Some folks, they got it out for Daphne. But you know to look at her—she’s one of those girls that talks it up all day, but when it comes down to lights-out she just lies there and acts like she’s doing you a favor. Velma? You know she takes off those glasses and she gets to work.”
Robert Brockway, The Unnoticeables
tags: heh
“You only fall when you look down, Coyote.”
Robert Brockway, Rx: A Tale of Electronegativity
“A roster,for example, is a lovely machine - who doesn't love its warm, crispy ejaculations?”
Robert Brockway, Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead
tags: humor
“Plus, if a vat-grown pig contracts heavy metal poisoning, suffers catastrophic cell decay, or has an embolism during the return trip, who gives a shit? Even QC's eyes no longer welled up when the vat-pigs inevitably squealed and keeled over. It was a matter of exposure: Witness a tragedy every day, and it becomes routine.”
Robert Brockway, Rx: A Tale of Electronegativity
“This is boring, my brain said; nothing to see here. Let’s do something else. Let’s start a fire.”
Robert Brockway, The Unnoticeables
“what may start with a harmless frog leaping just an inch higher could well end up with a sky eternally darkened by sinister patrols of helicopter sharks.”
Robert Brockway, Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead
“Wood chips and truck-stop coffee filled my lungs. I fucking love you, Carl P. Camel, inventor of the Camel.”
Robert Brockway, The Unnoticeables
“It was like a thousand beautiful voices singing to drown out a million more screaming.”
Robert Brockway, The Unnoticeables
“Things Canadians Are Good At • Politeness • Hockey • Syrup Things Canadians Are Bad At • Basketball • “Yo momma” jokes • Starting wars Things Canadians Are Questionable At • Wrangling tornadoes”
Robert Brockway, Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead
“each blade wavering in the slight breeze like the raised swords of a tiny, victorious army. The”
Robert Brockway, Rx: A Tale of Electronegativity


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Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody: The Terrifyingly Real Ways the World Wants You Dead Everything Is Going to Kill Everybody
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The Unnoticeables The Unnoticeables
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Rx: A Tale of Electronegativity Rx
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Rx - Episode 1: The Blackouts Rx - Episode 1
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