"So many books, so little time."
— Frank Zappa

"Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible."
— Frank Zappa

"Jazz isn't dead. It just smells funny."
— Frank Zappa

"Information is not knowledge.
Knowledge is not wisdom.
Wisdom is not truth.
Truth is not beauty.
Beauty is not love.
Love is not music.
Music is THE BEST."
— Frank Zappa

"If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library."
— Frank Zappa

"Without music to decorate it, time is just a bunch of boring production deadlines or dates by which bills must be paid."
— Frank Zappa (Real Frank Zappa Book)

"Definition of rock journalism: People who can't write, doing interviews with people who can't think, in order to prepare articles for people who can't read."
— Frank Zappa (The Real Frank Zappa Book)

"A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open."
— Frank Zappa

"If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it."
— Frank Zappa

"There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life."
— Frank Zappa

"Interviewer: 'So Frank, you have long hair. Does that make you a woman?'
Frank Zappa: 'You have a wooden leg. Does that make you a table?'"
— Frank Zappa

"Music is the only religion that delivers the goods."
— Frank Zappa

"Communism doesn't work because people like to own stuff."
— Frank Zappa

"The United States is a nation of laws, badly written and randomly enforced."
— Frank Zappa

"All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff."
— Frank Zappa

"Art is making something out of nothing, and selling it."
— Frank Zappa

"There's a big difference between kneeling down and bending over."
— Frank Zappa

"Drop out of school before your mind rots from exposure to our mediocre educational system. Forget about the Senior Prom and go to the library and educate yourself if you've got any guts. Some of you like Pep rallies and plastic robots who tell you what to read. "
— Frank Zappa

"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline - it helps if you have some kind of football team, or some nuclear weapons, but in the very least you need a beer."
— Frank Zappa

"I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird."
— Frank Zappa

"The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater."
— Frank Zappa

"I think it is good that books still exist, but they do make me sleepy."
— Frank Zappa

"There is no such thing as a dirty word. Nor is there a word so powerful, that it's going to send the listener to the lake of fire upon hearing it."
— Frank Zappa

"Take the Kama Sutra. How many people died from the Kama Sutra as opposed to the Bible? Who wins?"
— Frank Zappa

"Tobacco is my favorite vegetable."
— Frank Zappa

"Government is the Entertainment division of the military-industrial complex."
— Frank Zappa

"I have an important message to deliver to all the cute people all over the world. If you're out there and you're cute, maybe you're beautiful. I just want to tell you somethin' — there's more of us UGLY MOTHERFUCKERS than you are, hey-y, so watch out."
— Frank Zappa

"Some scientists claim that hydrogen, because it is so plentiful, is the basic building block of the universe. I dispute that. I say there is more stupidity than hydrogen, and that is the basic building block of the universe."
— Frank Zappa

"The most important thing in art is The Frame. For painting: literally; for other arts: figuratively-- because, without this humble appliance, you can't know where The Art stops and The Real World begins. You have to put a 'box' around it because otherwise, what is that shit on the wall?"
— Frank Zappa

"Anything Anytime Anyplace For No Reason At All (or AAAFNRAA)"
— Frank Zappa

"Drugs will turn you into your parents."
— Frank Zappa

"It's better to have something to remember than anything to regret."
— Frank Zappa (The Real Frank Zappa Book)

"I wrote a song about dental floss but did anyone's teeth get cleaner?"
— Frank Zappa

"The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down."
— Frank Zappa

"The essence of Christianity is told us in the Garden of Eden history. The fruit that was forbidden was on the tree of knowledge. The subtext is, All the suffering you have is because you wanted to find out what was going on. You could be in the Garden of Eden if you had just keep your fucking mouth shut and hadn't asked any questions."
— Frank Zappa

"A wise man once said, never discuss philosophy or politics in a disco environment. "
— Frank Zappa

"If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they'll murder you in your sleep."
— Frank Zappa

"In a fight between yourself and the world, always side with the world."
— Frank Zappa

"I'm vile and perverted.
I'm obsessed and deranged.
I've existed for years but very little has changed.
I'm the tool of the government and industry too.
For I'm destined to rule and regulate you.
You may think I'm pernicious, but you can't look away.
I'll make you think I'm delicious with the stuff that I say.
I'm the best you can get... have you guessed me yet?
I'm the slime oozing out of your TV set...."
— Frank Zappa

"A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians."
— Frank Zappa

"I never set out to be weird. It was always other people who called me weird."
— Frank Zappa

"The mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work unless it's open"
— Frank Zappa

"L'esprit, c'est comme un parachute: s'il reste fermé, on s'écrase."
— Frank Zappa

"A true Zen saying: "Nothing is what I want."
— Frank Zappa

""So many books, so little time."
"
— Frank Zappa

""So many books so little time""
— Frank Zappa

"Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on."
— Frank Zappa

"Anyone who is disturbed by the idea of newts in a nightclub is potentially dangerous.
"
— Frank Zappa

"dont eat the yellow snow"
— Frank Zappa

"The bassoon is one of my favorite instruments. It has a medieval aroma, like the days when everything used to sound like that. Some people crave baseball...I find this unfathomable, but I can easily understand why a person could get excited about playing the bassoon."
— Frank Zappa