Kim Harrison > Quotes

“That's why I want you there, he said. You're unpredictable, and that can be the difference between success and failure. Most people make decisions in anger, fear, love, or obligation. You make decisions to irritate people.”
― Kim Harrison, For a Few Demons More

“And then there are the rare ones who know love, who understand it. Who freely give of themselves, demanding only a return of that love,that trust.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Hey, ah, does anyone want a cookie or something? Oh yeah. A cookie. That would make everything better. Dunked in a shot of tequila , maybe? Or better yet, just the bottle? Yeah, that ought to do it.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“Plan B?' Ivy said. 'What is plan B?'
Jenks reddened. 'Grab the fish and run like hell,' he muttered, and I almost giggled.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“...treat people with understanding when you can, and fake it when you can't
until you do understand.”
― Kim Harrison

“Maybe he thinks he can rescue me? No one is that stupid. ”
― Kim Harrison, The Outlaw Demon Wails

“I told you, computers are like women. If you shout at them or ask them to do too many things at once, they shut down and you won't even get a sniff" pg. 4”
― Kim Harrison, The Good, the Bad, and the Undead

“What are you?" I rasped.
It smiled. "Whatever scares you.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“Growing up is hard, love. Otherwise everyone would do it.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“Oh for the sweet humpin' love of Tink! ~ Jenks”
― Kim Harrison, The Outlaw Demon Wails

“Tink's Panties!”
― Kim Harrison

“I'm only going to be here for a time, then leave you." His gaze met mine. "And I will cry when I go, because I could love you forever.”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“Face it, you stupid little cookie maker,” Jenks said, almost sounding fond, “in the last couple of days you’ve seen what it’s like to be in a family, with all the touchy tempers and irritation that goes on. Now you get to see the other side, where we do stupid stuff for each other just because we like you. Rache is the little sister. Ivy’s the big sister. I’m the uncle from out of state, and you’re the rich nephew no one likes but we put up with you anyway because we feel sorry for you. Just let me help, huh? It won’t kill you.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“The mistakes don't matter. It's what you do when you mess up that does.”
― Kim Harrison, Early to Death, Early to Rise

“You try getting through the Hollows traffic with a stoned redhead hanging out the window shouting, 'I'm king of the world!' ~Lee”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“Most of the upper management of I.S. were undead. I always thought it was because the job was easier if you didn't have a soul.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“Tagged by a whiny little vamp. Rache, take this sword and stick it in me. Just go and stick it in me. I'm a back-drafted, crumpled-winged, dust-caked, dew-assed excuse of a backup. Worthless as a pixy condom. Taken down by my own partner. Just tape my ass shut and let me fart out my mouth.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“Tink's a Disneyland whore!"-Jenks”
― Kim Harrison

“By Tink's diaphram...!”
― Kim Harrison

“A witch, a vampire, and a pixy walk into a bar, I thought as I led the way into the Squirrel’s End. It was early, and the sun had yet to set when the door swung shut behind Jenks, sealing us in the warm air smelling faintly of smoke. Immediately Nick yanked it open to come in behind us. And there’s the punch line.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“As the joke goes, you don’t have to be faster than the wolf chasing you, just faster than everyone else running away.”
― Kim Harrison, A Fistful of Charms

“Join us next time for Days of the Undead when Rachel learns her long lost brother is really a crown prince from outer space.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“What are you doing in Nicky's room, Rachel? Oooh! He summoned you to the west coast, didn't he? Did you kill him? Good for you taking care of that little problem? I should give you a bunny!" - Algaliarept”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“I was cold, hungry, and in a hole in the ground. But at least I had my elven porn, damnit!”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction

“You need a new hobby, Rachel. Something other than nasty little men with visions of world domination.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“Ivy turned. 'He bit you on the neck?' she said, deadpan serious but for her eyes. 'Oh, then it's got to be love. She won't let me bite her neck.”
― Kim Harrison, Dead Witch Walking

“Just so you know, I’ve trusted you since camp.”
― Kim Harrison, Pale Demon

“Go to sleep, baby,Mama will sing. Of blue butterflies, and dragonfly wings. Moonlight and sunbeams, raiments so fine. Silver and gold, for baby of mine. Go to sleep, baby. Sister will tell, of wolves and of lambs, and demons who fell.-Pierce's Lullaby

Kim Harrison (Black Magic Sanction)”
― Kim Harrison

“Hey, you freakin' bastard," I breathed. "You hit me again and I'll take care of your family planning.”
― Kim Harrison, Every Which Way But Dead

“I smell pancakes," Al said as he jauntily smacked Pierce's hat back on the witch's head. "Did the runt make you breakfast?" Al said, leaning over the stove. "Quickest way to a woman's crotch is through her gullet, eh?" he said, leering at Pierce, who was now rinsing out the percolator. "Is it working? I'd be curious to know. I'd buy her a cake or something.”
― Kim Harrison, Black Magic Sanction